“I don’t think these breasts are going to work for me,” Femme told me sometime later, as she drove her spear through the squealing body of a surprisingly aggressive rabbit. The rabbit struggled feebly then stilled as its blood began to drip down the hard wooden shaft.

Surprisingly gorey, I thought to myself, with a bit of distaste, but I kept it out of my voice as I replied, “Yeah?” to Femme’s comment. We’d already been hunting all afternoon, and while I was showing “Hungry” on my status screen, I didn’t really feel anything but a mild desire to call it quits and try some rabbit stew. The oppressive heat of the sweltering jungle and the constant abrasions of thorns on my exposed legs were also something I was aware of, but they didn’t bother me much. Was this body used to such hardship, or was I remembering a body that wasn’t? It was hard to judge what was normal when I was basically only half a day old in terms of experience.

“I remember hearing that real amazons would chop off their left breast to better use a bow,” Femme told me matter of factily, as if she weren’t discussing mutilating herself.

“Eww,” I said, as I took aim with my own bow, trusting in my body to properly handle the weapon as I loosed an arrow at a distant rabbit who seemed completely incapable of hiding in the ample brush all around us. Did they deliberately stand out in the open just so we could see them? I wondered. The arrow flew true, and I was rewarded with another horrible squeal and a brief “+10 experience points, +1.5 skill points (bow)” message.

“They get in the way, I mean, I can use my spear just fine, but I’ve twacked my boob with a bowstring twice today, and that shit hurts, man.”

“No it doesn’t” I said with a disbelieving snort, “you got that chainmail bikini on.”

“I’m telling you it does,” Femme said with conviction, “they are surprisingly sensitive, even through the armor,” she told me, craddling her bosom with her left arm as she tried to shake the dead rabbit off her spear. “Also, my bikini is heavier than before, but the armor value is the same, that’s like a hidden “extra weight” debuff right there, not to mention how much higher my center of gravity is,” she complained.

“Does the extra weight from the boobs themselves slow you down?” I asked, morbidly curious despite myself.

Femme grunted as the rabbit finally slid off, “Dunno, the game hides those stats from us, all I can tell is how much heavier the bikini is by doing an identify. Do you think I could weigh these boobs somehow?” She asked me, flopping the body parts in question by bouncing up and down on her heels, “they do feel kind of heavy,” she admitted. I watched the movement closely.

To tear my eyes from the distracting physics, I put away my bow, took out my knife, and poked the dead rabbit. It instantly transformed into a neatly skinned pelt. “+3 skill points (knife)” the message flashed. “Any way to turn off these messages I get after every time I do something?” I asked Femme.

“Sure, everything is voice operated, just say; system messages off. If you start your sentence with the word “system” the game knows you are talking directly to it.” Femme explained, then frowned, “Why would you get skill points for skinning the rabbit?” she asked, “Unless you have the knife skill?” She frowned at me suspiciously, “I thought this was your first character?”

I looked up at Femme as I was in the middle of picking up the rabbit skin. “It is my first character, I was given a knife skill book by a customer service rep because my memories are temporarily glitched,” I told her, “some sort of technical issue. I can’t remember anything from the real world,” I admitted.

“Wow, that sucks,” Femme said with concern, “Well, I mean, I wouldn’t really care if I couldn’t remember the real world,” she admitted, “That place sucks, but I’d be pissed if I couldn’t remember everything I learned from my last character.”

“You wouldn’t miss knowing about your real life?” I asked, surprised.

Femme cocked her head at me. “I’m a college student who only shows up to classes to take tests. I always ace the tests because I pay to have the information in the textbooks uploaded into my brain beforehand, it’s not even against the rules to do that, that’s what they expect you to do. My parents are paying people to upload the answers into my brain for the tests those same people give me. The whole place is some glorified social club my rich parents forced me to attend, I could have gotten the same education from uploads and skipped all the boredom, hardly anyone bothers to actually learn things the old fashioned way these days.”

“That does sound dull, if you aren’t into socializing,” I admitted.

“I’m not, if I were, would I be here?” She pointed out with a frown. “It hardly matters though, the time I spend bored in the real world is hard to remember, I spend six hours a day inside IF at sixty times acceleration. So, to me, the real world is just these dull 18 hour periods in between 360 hours stretches inside the game world. I spend like 5% of my time in the real world.”

I nodded, thinking to myself that when described like that, it didn’t really seem like I was missing much by not remembering the real world. Was I someone who was also bored by reality who’d come to flee into this world?

“Hey, since you got comp’d a free knife skill tome, I got a gift for you,” Femme said excitedly. “I was thinking of using this today, but decided not to since these boobs were too mighty, couldn’t properly use one!” She said, demonstrating how the rapid close movements of slashing with the knife that had suddenly appeared in her hands caused her arms and breasts to smash into each other with considerable force. “Ouch…” the knife fell to the dirt floor of the jungle as Femme puased to rub her breasts again.

I shook my head in disbelief and reached down to pick up the dropped knife, examining it closely. A blue screen popped up. “Jackrabbit Ripper: This knife was specifically designed to slaughter cute and cuddly rabbits, you are a monster for even owning such a thing. Bonus physical damage: +150%, Bonus magic damage: +150%, Bonus attack speed; +25%, Special modifiers; Rabbit Bane: x2 damage against any rabbit type creature, Cruel Weapon: x2 damage with any on hit damage over time effect that causes pain.”

Physically, the knife looked quite sinister. It boosted a serrated edge with grooves for what I assumed blood or poison to flow, it was slightly curved to better suit a slashing style of combat, though it also had a wickedly sharp point. The hilt was clearly made of rabbit fur. “I can’t tell how good this weapon is,” I admitted.

“It’s a powerful weapon, multiples both your physical and magic damage by 2.5? That’s high end. Times five against bunnies? Insane damage. You wouldn’t know, but weapons in this game aren’t level locked, instead, they just scale off your base damage. So that weapon in the hands of my level 180 assassin would tear up a Titanic Death Rabbit in a single blow. In your hands, well, it should be enough to let us move up to higher level rabbits further in. We need to pick up the pace a bit, I think. Consider this gift an investment I’m making so our team can hit level 5 faster than that ass back at NAPIL.”

You might be reading a pirated copy. Look for the official release to support the author.

“Why the magic damage though?” I asked, puzzled.

“Most mage type classes can use knives, so most knives offer some magic damage bonus,” Femme explained. “That means that just holding it will make your magic stronger. As an assassin that bonus effect from cruel weapons is super nice too, my old character uses a lot of poison, too bad that’s a class specific skill,” Femme noticed my puzzled look and clarifed, “ah a skill only assassins can use, every class has several, you’ll learn one when we finish this quest.”

It was nice having an experienced player along to explain these things, I thought to myself. “I thought you were a new player too, since you didn’t know your armor changed size when you made your boobs bigger,” I told her with a chuckle.

Femme flushed slightly, “Well, I never modified my old character’s appearance, he’s a dude, looked the same the day I made him as he did the last time I played him. This is my first time playing as a girl character.” She admitted. “I thought big boobs would be cool, but turns out they are only cool when someone else has them, not when you have them yourself.”

I swung the knife a few times to get the feel for it, it felt good in my hands, and I found myself doing the same elaborate set of moves that Femme had tried, a series of quick slashes with arms held close to the chest. My body seemed to perform the motions of its own accord, and my own modest breasts did not interfere. “Thanks, I’ll use this then, appreciate the gift,” I told Femme.

“Don’t mention it,” Femme said, “I got a whole bank full of cool knives going to waste, it’s the big advantage of starting new characters, your bank is linked to you, not your characters, so you can equip your low level characters with cool stuff your main character aquired.”

I nodded, but inwardly I wondered, who was my bank account linked to? I was just this one character, I had nothing else to fall back on, no other frame of reference. I was this character, it was a strange distinction, because Femme was not. She was wearing her character, but she didn’t even consider it her “main”, much less her true self.

“There’s a ravine up ahead, according to my map,” Femme said, gesturing at empty air at some screen only she could see, “It has infant vorpral rabbits, those are level 10. We should be able to take them on now that we are both using high level gear, what do you say, want to live dangerously?” She asked with a grin.

“Sure,” I said, how bad could vorpal bunnies be?

Turns out, pretty bad.

“Oh god, I can’t stop the bleeding!” I yelled, wrapping my hands around the gushing wound on Femme’s neck.

“Relax,” Femme coughed, spraying me with yet more blood, “I can’t die here,” she groaned, “but it does kinda hurt. Just pour some of this healing potion on it.” Femme instructed, conjuring a health potion from her inventory.

I took the offered bottle out of her hands and poured it liberally on the wound, watching it seal up completely within seconds. Femme sighed with relief. “Never leave town without a healing potion,” she told me. “Now if only I had brought a holy hand grenade, that wouldn’t have been so hard,” she added, chuckling.

“Sorry, what is a holy hand grenade?” I asked blankly.

“I forget you have no memories of pop culture. I guess losing your real world memories really is a terrible thing,” Femme said with a snort as she sat up.

The fast moving rabbit had managed to gnaw out her neck by jumping onto the chainmail bikini. From that ample platform, it had managed to bite into Femme’s neck by taking advantage of the good grip offered by the chainmail bikini and our combined inability to attack it properly while it was so perched. After it had ripped out a chunk of flesh, I’d managed to land a glancing knife blow that caused the foul little beastie to literally explode from the overkill damage dealt; the 5x damage modifier making what should have been a mild wound into a fountain of gore. We were both soaked in a mix of human and rabbit blood. “We need a bath,” I opined.

“Agreed, my map says there's a river over here,” she told me, jabbing her finger at a spot of air in front of her where only she could see a screen.

I nodded, unwilling to point out that I couldn’t see what she was pointing at, but she took a look at my face and shook her head with a smile. “I forget you don’t know how to set your interface up properly. Say, “System show mini map”,” she told me.

I did so, and a bird’s eye view of the surrounding area appeared in the upper left corner of my field of view, and I discovered that whenever Femme touched her own map, a little red “ping” appeared on my own map, accompanied by the characteristic sound of a ping. For a minute or two as we walked, Femme enterained herself by pinging my map constantly until I finally told her to stop.

I found the map distracting enough without the added distractions of pings, as it constantly convinced my brain that I was spotting movement when it moved with the motion of my head and eyes, like having a floating display buzzing about. I resolved to turn off the feature later, but eventually I got used to it, and left it on. It was funny to see myself from above as I walked, and I once paused to try to wave at the spot where the floating viewpoint would have to be, but there was nothing to see in the sky above me. Had I been expecting to see a drone?

At the river, Femme immediately stripped down naked, and jumped in. I averted my eyes.

“Look, they float!” She exclaimed, forcing me to turn to look at her, chest deep in water, with her busty bosom bobbing up and down. I blushed and looked away again. “What are you doing, strip and get in you noob!” she yelled.

Reluctantly, I did so, stripping off my blood soaked T-Shirt, then at Femme’s stern look, also the chain mail bikini which, she argued; “Don’t go in water with an iron bikini, it might rust!” It was a claim I doubted, but seeing Femme’s determination to have get naked, I complied, then gingerly waded into the cold river.

“You are such a prude,” She told me, confirming my fears, as I stood with my arm crossed in front of my own breasts.

“Sorry,” I mumbled, crestfallen.

“Don’t be sorry,” Femme laughed, walking up to me and grabbing me in a tight hug that smooshed her breasts against the back of my arm, “It’s so adorable, makes me want to tease you. I don’t think I’ve ever met any player who still has any real modesty left.”

“You seemed upset when that Thotslayer made fun of you.” I pointed out.

“Not for saying I should get naked, if she’d said it differently, I might actually have done it,” Femme replied, “I got upset because of the scorn, because she was making fun of me because I didn’t know the clothes changed sizes to fit. She was mocking me because he thought I was a noob, so it made me want to prove that I wasn’t. Seems silly now that I say that out loud,” She admitted as she rubbed her ample bosom against me, slowly forcing my arm out of the way until she managed to rub her nipples directly against mine.

“What are you doing?” I gasped, startled.

“Trying to seduce you, duh,” She said with a laugh.

“Here, in the middle of the woods, at night?” For dusk had fallen and we were standing in the middle of an icy river in the bright moonlit night.

“It’s supposed to be romantic,” she whispered huskily, leaning in to kiss me.

“Wait, I’m not sure about this,” I said weakly, starting to back up.

“Come on,” Femme insisted, “we got to try out these new girl bodies. I know we are probably both men playing women characters, but there’s nothing gay about a little friendly exploration between two hot chicks.”

“Two women having sex isn’t gay?” I asked, confused. “And I don’t know that I’m really a guy, this is the only body I’ve ever known.”

Femme nibbled on my neck as I tried to keep her lips away from mine. “Dude, come on, you know you find me attractive with these boobs. I can feel how hard your nipples are.”

“This is a cold river,” I protested.

“And these boobs are probably getting nerfed tommorow,” Femme countered, “After that rabbit used them as a perch to gnaw my throat out, I am totally saying farwell to to these F cups. This is the only chance either of us will ever have to truly experience these awesome boobs as they are meant to be experienced.”

I admit I was starting to come around to the idea, as Femme’s hands snuck under the water and starting doing things to me. I was curious and my resistance had been worn down, so that night, Femme took my virginity.