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Chapter 5– Eye Opening.
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"So, Ben, what is your story? Also, what is your connection to Spider-Man?" She asks as she begins to haphazardly pour herself some red wine and spill some all over the white sofa staining it practically forever because she is trying to focus on the TV while fixing herself a drink. She also doesn't seem to care about anything in this luxury penthouse suite because it doesn't belong to her.
It is also kind of pissing me off that she asks me such an important question about my life, like it doesn't really matter. This woman is paying more attention to her wine and TV show than she is to an impertinent question about my existence. I don't think I will answer her. I am not even sure why I am here.
"I'm not saying anything. why do you even want to know? Honestly, I am wasting my time. I don't even know why I came." I really don't. All I know is that she said some hard-hitting things that really hit the nail on the head for me, and when she told me to follow her, I ended up doing so. Maybe it was because she flashed a little skin at me, and I followed, being controlled by my other head.
I really am not Peter am I, as he would have definitely not done that, and yet I did. So I guess at least half of me is not Peter which means I will obviously make some different decisions than him, but then again, Peter is also the cleverer half, so this was probably just a bad call made by my idiot half that was blinded by the sway of her succulent flesh, I need to get out of here before I make any more mistakes.
"Come on now, Ben. You know why you came here? It's because you have nowhere else to go. So now come here and take a seat. Do you like The Office? Do you want some wine? I have beers as well?" So what the hell am I doing? I really don't know, but I go and sit down anyway. Still, I make sure to sit on the sofa chair instead of on the same couch as her as I am sure that if I do, then I might end up making some serious mistakes, so I cross my arms and sit stiffly on the chair as if that will somehow make my mindset rigid and unchanging.
"No thanks, I'm good," I say, rejecting the glass of wine she was offering me, and she just shrugs and takes a sip showing she doesn't care about my rejection. My more ordinary side constantly worried about saying the wrong thing or offending someone by accident and forever breaking that bridge, which is probably why that side didn't really achieve much. I will be better than that. I will be better than both of them.
"So Ben, you clearly don't want to talk about it. And that is fine. It is actually normal. But we are not normal people, are we? I go out and steal all sorts of things while dressed as a cat. I don't even steal valuable things sometimes, like one time I stole a small plushie of a cat from a gift store at a museum I robbed and completely forgot about what I came for and left with just the plushie." I actually, for some reason, that actually makes me feel a bit better.
"I still have that plushie in my room right now. And you, well, you are dressed like Spider-Man, have the same powers as Spider-Man, you sound, talk and quip like him and yet, you are not Spider-Man, not at all. It isn't hard to make some guesses. I mean, there are all sorts of stuff in this world, and you hear quite a lot of bizarre things. I am sure you are not the weirdest thing to ever exist." I am not the weirdest thing in the world, and it probably isn't the most incredible thing in the world, but to know that there are others in more abnormal and worse situations than myself makes me feel better.
"You came here. You followed me because you had nowhere else to go. I was like that once, I trusted the wrong person and let my guard down, and they took advantage and abused the trust I had for them. They didn't even think they did anything wrong, which made me so angry that I felt like ripping him to shreds. I quit college and completely pushed everything else out of my mind except for him. I got rid of everything and focused only on him and how I would make him pay." This does sound familiar. I think I have heard it somewhere before.
"When I was finally going to get him, he got run over by a car and died on the asphalt, having not felt any of the pain that I felt. My rage grew even bigger and more toxic, knowing that I had nowhere for it to go and knowing that I would never satisfy the ire inside me. I was lost, and I had nothing when someone came out of nowhere. A friend of my father's came, and he gave me direction and somewhere to channel the feelings inside me, so I trained and worked till is sweat blood until I became the best thief in the world." I mean, I knew some of her origins and had a general idea thanks to my other half's knowledge, but I...
"You are just like me, Ben, like I used to be. You had something that you lived for, that was your single purpose for being, and now you don't. You are lost like I was, and that is why you followed me because you thought that I was going to carry the torch and light the way for you. But I am not gonna do that. It is too much responsibility for me. But I can help you by showing you how I dealt with everything I felt and my lost purpose." So I suppose she could be correct, and that is why I followed her.
Could it be because I had suddenly lost Aunt May and Mary Jane, who were the critical factors in my life as Peter Parker and the only people I still had access to? But I couldn't even go to them as there was already a Peter there who was precisely the person that they remembered instead of whatever person I am now?
Maybe I was just looking for some sort of companionship? Perhaps I was desperate for it? And that is why I followed this woman who showed a bit of herself to me, craving something that resembled what I had with them. Even my other side wanted it, never having ever had the sort of relationships that Peter had himself.
"And what is that? How did you deal with it, oh wise cat burglar?" She is a bloody thief. How in the hell is she supposed to help me with my problems? And yet even though I am asking her sarcastically, there is still some part of me that is hoping beyond hope that she might actually have one iota of actual knowledge. Something that may be able to help me or give me some direction on what to do with myself since I am entirely unsure of what to do past my first goal of acquiring money.
She looks at me, taking her eye off her comedy show and regarding me for a second before picking up the remote and pausing the show and placing her glass of wine on the table. Then, finally, she takes her feet off that table and sits up straight to face me with a serious look on her face.
"Hm, okay, I'll tell you then. I started to live for myself. I started living for myself and only myself, and everything is so much better when you only have to worry about yourself. You don't have to worry about others. You don't have to change your life in order to fit into other people's schedules. You do what you want to do and only what you want to do. You don't even have to pay any attention to the law or how what you do affects other people because you are living for yourself. It is okay to be selfish. You have already given yourself, and everything you were to others, and they took advantage and used you till there was nothing left of you. it is time to live for yourself and not others." I don't really, I mean.
This is how my other half pretty much lived, except he was a bit too much of a coward to do whatever he wanted without regard for the law, too afraid of the consequences, but this does resignate with the part of him inside me. Even my more noble half is resignating with this. Peter has given a lot and sacrificed a lot. He lost his Uncle because of his selfishness, but that was not his fault. It was not his job to stop thieves, even if he did have powers. He was still just a kid back then.
Becoming Spider-Man and trying to save others took more from Peter than being selfish ever had. First, he had basically killed the father of his only love, and not only that, he even lost the greatest love of his life due to his own foolish actions. The Goblin might have pushed her off the ledge, but it was his web that snapped her spine into two. And then, just when he began to heal and move forward in his life with the wondrous Mary Jane, the clone of Gwen Stacy showed up and brought all the guilt to the forefront of his being again.
And because he was Spider-Man, Gwen was not even allowed to rest in peace. Having a facsimile of her brought back to life was all his fault and would never have happened if he was not Spider-Man. And now he can't even be with Mary Jane because he is no longer the man she fell in love with. The other Peter is, regardless of who was the actual clone. So maybe it is time to be selfish. The death of Uncle Ben was a terrible thing, but it did not occur because he was being selfish. In contrast, being selfless has consistently brought misery and misfortune to his life and the people surrounding him.
I am broken out of my musing by Felicia. she is talking to me again. "So, come on. I told you about myself, so tell me about yourself. I might just come across Spider-Man one of these days, and maybe I will tell him about the curious encounter I had with someone who looked exactly like him. I am sure he will- AH!" My hand is wrapped around her throat and pressed down hard, constricting her breathing and turning her face red.
She can still breathe, but just barely, and I know that if I were to squeeze just a little harder, I could completely cut off her airway and stop her breathing forever. To have such power in your hands is intoxicating. I can feel myself getting absorbed by it. Suddenly, Aunt May and Uncle Ben flash through my head, and I quickly shake my feelings away and slightly loosen my grip around her throat to let her breathe easier.
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With the newly found oxygen making its way into her lungs, she begins to look less ruddy, and her arms suddenly move up and grasp around my arm. I ready myself for another battle with this woman- "Harder." -She pulls my arm further in to press against her throat, and I quickly release my grip and jump backwards away from the redfaced woman who is panting heavily.
Massaging her throat, she smirks naughtily at me and sits up a bit to right her position on the sofa, not at all showing any anger at my actions. If anything, I would say that she is disappointed that I removed my hand from her oesophagus.
"So, are you gonna tell me or not? Or do you wanna go back to choking me? It is up to you, really." She casually says, acting like I wasn't just choking her within an inch of her life, which catches me flat-footed as I am unsure of what to do in this situation.
I am also warring with the contradicting thoughts and feelings inside of myself, with one half of me thinking that I should either take her up on her offer or get rid of her for the sake of my future in this world, while my more heroic half is vehemently against it not wanting to harm someone even if it is for my own sake. I need to sort out this had of mine and reaffirm just what kind of person I am now instead of pussyfooting around and being indecisive. If I do this at the wrong time, I could very quickly end up dead.
"I am a clone of spider-man." Ah, it just slipped out of my mouth. Goddamn, you stupid Peter side, you just knew that my more cynical half was probably going to kill this woman because I sure as shit did not want to tell this woman anything about my background, especially because she is a cat burglar and a thief which obviously means she is untrustworthy and that I can not trust her as far as I can throw her because I can throw her quite far, at least three city blocks. I don't know what I would have done in this situation.
I definitely did not want to tell her anything, so chances are I would have ended up physically confronting her, and I don't know how far I would have gone, especially with the sly threats she was making me. So I guess that my Peter side probably did the right thing. What would she do with that information anyway? Probably best not to think about that. What's said is said, and now I am just going to have to deal with it and move forward. I really need to get my head in order.
"Oh, a clone?" She says, and I wait for her to continue, but she doesn't. Instead, she just reaches down, picks up her glass to take another sip of her red wine, and relaxes on the couch with her legs rising to rest on her coffee table.
She languishes on the couch like I didn't just tell her I was proof of one of the most researched subjects in the world, that my literal existence would make kings and representatives of nations all across the globe drop everything they are doing in the hopes of acquiring my body and the secrets of cloning held within my body.
"I-Is, is that it? No, how is that possible? No, who in the hell made you? I-I am a clone, a copy of Spider-Man made on the whims of a mad scientist, and all you can say is, oh, a clone?" I-I am a... What is wrong with this woman? Is that the correct response when confronted with such a mind-blowing revelation, human life fully cloned and copied, an entirely new separate life created from someone else's cells? Someone took the role of god and put something new onto this Earth, and it is not even an average human that was cloned, but a superhuman and all she can say is, oh.
"Hm, what do you want me to say? Oh my, a clone of Spider-Man! Just think, if I can discover the secrets of cloning from his body, then I can continuously clone thousands of Spider-Men and create a Spider-Army. With such an army, I can take over New York, nay, the entirety of planet Earth. And then I can live out the rest of my days as the empress of Earth, having my Spider-Men continuously attend to my every need and having weekly orgies with them. Is that what you expected? Well, sorry to disappoint, but I am delighted with my current station in life. I enjoy looking out for only myself, and it seems like my happy life would be seriously upset if I took such actions, though I am quite curious about your origins, so just so I can avoid him in the future, but who was this mad scientist?"
"O~kay, the orgy part was unnecessary, but I think you made your point."
"Really? I thought that was the most crucial point. If you rule the world, you will obviously have orgies. It is just a matter of fact." I shake my head at her words. I mean, if I did rule the world and I had no one trying to upset my rule, then yeah, I probably would have orgies, but that is just a fantasy. I would also probably try to keep my distance from a touchy subject like cloning. If everybody knew you had all the secrets of cloning, you probably wouldn't get any time to yourself.
"You don't have to worry about the mad scientist. He is most likely dead, and if he isn't, you just have to keep your distance from Spider-Man, don't get too close to him, and you will be fine. As for my origins, well, I am a perfect clone of Spider-Man down to the very last cell and memory, though I am more jaded than he is, which is to be expected with me being an artificially created life. Brewed in a test tube."
Felicia lets out a laugh. "And I was a C-Section. What's your point? There are quite a few test-tube babies in the world. Just because you were made as an exact copy of someone and were probably aged up doesn't mean you are any different from them. Seriously, stop bitching. As far as I can see, you have just been given a fresh lease on life with none of the previous commitments, not to mention you have a superpowered body, make the most of it and enjoy life instead of complaining about it. Also, you have all of his memories and the same body, right? I can tell that you have that same juicy rump, but are you the same everywhere, or are there some differences?" She seriously confuses me, this woman.
Why can't she just stay on one topic instead of switching every which way and continuing to catch me off guard? I hate it even more since she actually makes some good points apart from some of the stuff she says, which tells me that she obviously doesn't have much of a background when it comes to scientific subjects.
"As I said before, I am a perfect clone of Spider-Man. You can basically think of it as a different timeline. You know how in Back To The Future, they go back in time and change the past, which creates a separate branch of the future. It is kind of like that. My memories are basically the same as the originals up until I woke up in that massive test tube. At that time, I had branched off and become an entirely different existence completely separate from the original. It would make a lot more sense if I could use some visuals. Do you have a chalkboard or something?" That is about the best way to describe how my and the other Peter's existence correlate together.
But that doesn't even consider the appearance of my other memories from another world. Also, our existence didn't separate when I came out of a test tube, but when I emerged from the top of that smokestack, but I don't want to tell Felicia about that.
"Nerd. But I get it. I don't need any visuals, so stop with the medical mumbo jumbo. You are the exact same until that point, so that means he looks exactly like you do under that mask." I... did not think about that when I was explaining things, crap baskets. I am the exact same as him except for my newly blonde hair, so I have just basically fucked him over even though that was the one thing I did not want to do. I just wanted to leave this city and leave Peter and Aunt May and everybody behind to live their lives without me.
Still, I have just basically revealed his identity to one of the criminals Peter confronts weekly. Though Peter is not exactly famous, and there are probably a thousand people in this city that could look similar to him, it is perhaps not the end of the world if she has an idea of what she looks like. I plan on leaving, and my image will slightly fade from her mind afterwards, so she will most likely not find him anytime soon, and if she does, that will be his fault and not mine.
"He lives in a city of millions, and he doesn't exactly stand out. You would be hard-pressed to even find him, you would be looking for a random white dude with blonde hair, and you are definitely not gonna run into him when he is out of costume. So it honestly doesn't matter if you know what he looks like. the chances of you running into him without his underoos is a billion to one." I say, leaving in the red herring of Peter having blonde hair though I can't do much in the way of my other features.
Hopefully, if she begins to search for him, that will become a crucial part of her search criteria, which will eliminate Peter from her searches even if he looks the exact same as me. People can be dumb like that sometimes, hiding in plain sight, as it were.
"Hmm, well, I don't particularly care. I was just wondering if he is as good-looking as you are. Also, I just wanted to confirm that I wasn't flirting with some weird guy. you can't always be too sure who you are dealing with or who it is under the mask, after all." She says while shrugging before grabbing the TV remote and resuming her show, leaving me awkwardly sitting there, not knowing what to do. I honestly didn't know what would happen when I followed her here, but I expected something else instead of just sitting here and watching her drink wine and watch a comedy.
I sit there and watch the comedy with her for a while as she just sips her wine and laughs at the show, but eventually, I get tired of just sitting here and not doing anything. I need to be doing something to better my situation, and this is clearly not it. I let out a sigh and got to my feet, knowing that I at least gained something here, which was a new perspective on life. Walking towards the balcony, I at least know that I have some kind of idea of what I want to do with my life, and that is whatever I want to do. At least Felicia gave me some-
"Hey, where are you going? Sit down and watch the show. if you're hungry, I have some snacks and stuff in the kitchen." She calls out to me, stopping me from heading onto the balcony, resuming my life, and getting away from whatever weird little pitstop this was.
"I'm going, Felicia. I appreciate your help, and your words did help me in some way, so thank you. But I need to go now. I don't have the luxury to continue wasting my time here. Goodbye, Felicia." I resume my steps, hearing her pause her show once more and get to her feet, but I don't let that stop me as I get to the glass doors and place my hand on its handle. I go to put-
"Ben did you not even listen to what I said. So you don't have the luxury? I literally just told you to start being selfish and enjoy yourself, but I suppose I can understand some of your aversion to that being who you used to be. But maybe this will change your mind, you only have whatever is on your body right now, and that is it, don't you? I have connections and can help you get identification and whatever else you need. And if it is money you need, well, I can help with that too." She gestures to the pile of jewellery and cash on the table, which does catch my eye. After all, I was just trying to steal it from her less than an hour ago.
"We can deal with all that stuff tomorrow, though, for now. You can sleep on the couch, or if you prefer... You can join me in my room. my bed is big enough for two." She slinks over to her door and presses the handle down before pushing it open and leaning sultrily against the doorway with one hand caressing the other side of the doorframe, inviting me into her room to spend the night.
I am... I really need to sort my head out.