For context, once upon a time, there was a powerful Goddess of Destiny. Her only lover and husband was a mere mortal man whose fate she tweaked. From that union spawned three children. Well, not children exactly; she birthed monsters that could become man or beast. Each went on to become the first of their kind. Thanks to her maneuvering, of course.
Unable to stop herself, she spun and weaved the fate and likeness of two of her children to be the spitting image of their father. The third was made in her own.
You'd think the third would be the one she favored, but the third grew to become the one she loathed the most. That third child took something away from the Goddess of Destiny that no one could bring back. And she tried hard with everything she could to do so.
The Goddess of Destiny messed up her third child's fate as punishment. According to history, the third child had multiple curses placed upon them. The third child lost their true form and name. The bereaved Goddess of Destiny even took death away to ensure that that exit was closed forever for her hated spawn. This was why the third child went from a fire monstrous bird to what would become known as a phoenix. A bright bird doomed to burn repeatedly, each time taking on a new face and identity.
Anyone reading my diary can guess by this point that that third child was my ancestor. Her name wasn't Sunny but something else entirely.
Maybe she missed her real name and just wanted someone to say it. Is that why she was so sweet but cruel to me? We technically are family, just distantly related.
And I think I got it right. I must have because I wasn't dead. The Phoenix Goddess was my family ancestor; thanks to her blood, our family was powerful. Her true name was cursed and not to be spoken ever…
I was thinking about this as I slowly woke up. Yet again, I was being carried around by my ancestor in male form. We were walking through the Unruly Forest. I ignored the trees and stared at him as if I could determine his motives.
"Who is John?" I said when the silence grew too thick.
"My current toy." The Phoenix God said simply.
"What should I call you if I can't use your real name?" It was written in bold ink in the family history books what the rules regarding it were. That name could be seen but never spoken. It was suggested to never even think about it due to the curse woven into its being. In the books, the name was spaced out so that even by accident, they couldn't combine to form her name. Before she became who she was, she was just a demi-god whose mother lost her mind. There was a lull in the stories because she must have ascended somehow. Or I underestimated just how powerful a demi-god could become.
"It doesn't matter. Mordecai, Keeper, Girru, Aphra, Bellona, or any others I've used would work." He said, sighing. "Now, can you shut up? You're rather heavy."
How could a God balk at carrying a small, growing girl like myself? He was clearly lying. "Aphra? Isn't that a Goddess from this world?" I asked. He told me to shut up, but I had questions. A few more couldn't hurt.
Oh, but it did; he tossed me cruelly to the ground. "You can walk yourself to your house."
I rubbed my butt and glared up at him. "Is that any way to treat family?"
"Distant family."
"Mordecai blood will out!" I said, standing to square off. The first name that he stated would work for now. It was also better than calling him Keeper like on the Effaced box.
"Not in this body. You have no blood that comes from me." Mordecai gave an uppercut of logic I couldn't combat or see coming. I was mentally knocked to the ground, and I mourned the loss.
"Why are you here then?" I said.
"You left your family's library," Mordecai said. He pulled out a familiar coin and played with it across his knuckles. "When your soul came here, the danger you were in was brought to my attention."
"Danger from you," I said snarkily.
He gave a chirp of a laugh, "Never from me."
"Then who?" I said, my voice a quiet murmur.
"Anyone that wants a piece of me." He said with an uncaring smirk.
Easy for him to laugh and smirk at that when I had to live in secret most of my life. "So it's your fault my family has had to hide," I said. "Doesn't that mean the danger does come from you?"
"By association, my dear Gwendolyn. But those dead relatives of ours have themselves to blame. Power attracts attention, and no matter how far removed, those with the blood of the divine have it in spades."
"Why go through all this trouble?" This was something I was dying to know. He didn't have to do all this extra stuff if he was just checking in on me.
"This world was a fun puzzle to crack. I wanted to know why it would be reset more than once. It's not a time loop exactly, and due to your godblood, you set off a chain of events I needed to facilitate and observe."
"Needed to or wanted to because you were bored," I said with narrow eyes. I felt like I was getting answers to questions I would have in twenty years, not the answers I needed right now.
"I want to see if you can beat the odds, Gwendolyn. I want to see if you will beat fate."
I made a face at that and opted for a new strategy. "Where's Sunny and Sonja?" I asked him. That should have been my first question, but I hesitated to know what he would say.
"Sunny was just the body I used to get close to you. I needed to study you. Sonja never existed. She was a bit of twisted magic that created the illusion of life. Wyatt was sent back to the fish place if that's what you want to ask about next."
It was good to know that Wyatt was safe. Given how much he hid his true strength, I wasn't surprised to hear that. What was more shocking was what he said about Sonja. The question about which one in the clearing was Sonja was clearly just a setup. If Sonja wasn't real, then the answer was neither. It was just a trick.
Speaking of weird tricks.
"What was with all those weird games in the clearing," I said they were chaotic and disorganized, and they didn't make any sense to me.
"I needed to make sure that you met Wyatt and keep the timeline on the correct path."
"Why not just do it?" I said with a scrunched expression.
"Why should I do anything for nothing?" Mordecai countered.
There was a lull as I opened my mouth to ask Mordecai why he was carrying me instead of teleporting us to my house.
Before I could bombard him with another question, the man grinned at me with malice. "It's time for you to grow up. Stop ignoring things until it comes smacking you in the head. Or you'll regret it because I'll make you learn the hard way until it gets through. You know what you're forcing yourself to disregard."
My mouth fell open at the sudden assault.
His smile dropped from his face, and he looked serious for half a second before the smile came back. "I want you to win against the odds. You're my last descendant, after all."
I tilted my head to the side, ignoring everything else he said, "No, I'm not. My grandma and Gus are still around."
Mordecai gave a ghost of a smile. "Are they?" And disappeared.
Cold fear grabbed my heart at his words. Did that mean they died while I was here?
I don't know how I stumbled through the forest, but I made it somehow. I needed to sleep off whatever the hell all of that was and then go find Wyatt for some answers. Then leave this world. I wasn't running away precisely, but it was not comforting that a shape-changing God was watching me. His spores floated all around my forest and I made a face. They were magical glowing fungi that could attack and likely spy on me as well.
My body was aching and tired, and I didn't need the dark sky to tell me it was past bedtime. I couldn't do much if I was going to pass out halfway.
My plans were paused, however, by the sight of Adam. He stood on the front porch stiff with an expression I couldn't read in the dark.
"Adam?" I said. "What are you doing here?" I ran up to him, and he barely moved. He stood tall and obscured by darkness. I might have balked if this was anyone else, but this was Adam. Something was off about him. I got up on my tippy toes to touch his cheek. It was icy to the touch.
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"How long have you been out here? Let's go inside." I reached for his hand and held tight as I tried to direct us into the home.
"Where were you?" Adam's voice was full of emotion, and he dug his heels, pulling on our connected hands. This stopped me from moving, and I turned to look at him.
It was dark, and I couldn't see his expression. Maybe it was time to start worrying. "A distant relative stopped by and tied me up."
"For two weeks?" Adam said.
I blinked as I processed that. I was gone for two weeks? "How is that possible? I…” My mouth flapped open as I tried to think about the time I spent being spirited around by Mordecai.
"I'm sorry. I don't know it was that long."
He lifted me, and unlike the times Mordecai held me, I clung to Adam. I wrapped my hands around his neck and said, "I'm so sorry."
"That's not enough," Adam said and quickly strode into the house and tossed me onto my bed. Before I could catch my breath, he pressed down on me.
His clothing felt cold on my skin, but his lips were hot. He inhaled me, not allowing me any air that didn't come from him, and I breathed him in.
Adam all but ripped the Glutt sweater off me and the sweats I wore under them. In seconds, I was laid bare for his perusal, and he scanned me from head to toe with his smoldering eyes and chilly fingers.
I gasped as he prodded every inch of my body with his tongue and hands.
"Adam…" I tried to question him, but I ended up just saying his name over and over as he set my body ablaze.
I was wet, pilant and ready and even after I came I expected Adam to pull away, to stop himself like before. Instead, he got naked. I lay panting on the bed as I watched him rip off his clothing. His body was taut with concentration, and I reached out to touch him, but he used his tie to restrain my hands together.
"You are mine," Adam said and entered me. Pain from the entry brought a whimper from me, and he cupped my face to kiss the tears. Gentle, regular Adam would have paused, but this was a beast of a man, and he instead found my sweet spots as he maintained his pace.
Adam's skin was heating up against my own, and I could feel pleasure intermingle with the pain until the pleasure won. We're finally one.
He didn't untie my hands and kept me pinned as he dominated my body. I'd never seen this side of Adam. He wasn't one to lose his cool or give into passion. I wanted to reach out to touch him, but he sort of tied my hands. I rubbed our noses among the motion and whispered, "I'll always be yours."
We didn't finish for quite some time. And when we did he fell asleep pressing me down.
I woke up first as was often the case. The sun was slowly entering the sky but I couldn't greet it. Adam hadn't untied my hands, and I stared at his sleeping face, which was planted on my chest.
The rise and fall of my chest lifted his head, and I laughed a little as I playful breathed heavily to watch it. "You never stop playing, do you?" Adam's rumbly voice tickled my breast, as did the beard he'd been hard at work growing while I was gone. I suppose that was why his face was hidden in the shadows before.
"Untie me, and I'll behave."
"No," Adam said, and my heart jumped at how good his early morning voice sounded. "You never behave. That's not a fair deal." He lifted his head up to scan my face.
"You're the most misbehaved. What came over you last night?" My tone was still joking, but I was genuinely confused. For as long as we'd been together, he'd never ripped pleasure out of me like that. It was hot and fun, but what happened while I was gone?
"My uncle mentioned he saw you at the store," Adam said, and my heart began to race.
"Oh, did he?" I averted my gaze as I spoke, noting how beautiful the lemon trees looked this morning. I had been away, but they looked as well taken care of as ever.
"He said you were buying a pregnancy test." Adam's voice was neutral, but there was an undercurrent of something in his tone.
"That's strange. What would I need to buy one of those for?" I wished I could run off and do something, but Adam trapped me.
"Then you disappeared from Alcom before you were supposed to leave. And Wyatt did as well." Adam's neutral tone was gone, and there was icy venom all but falling off the last few words.
So it was my Wyatt, I mean this world's Wyatt, kidnapped by my ancestor.
"He returned a few days ago, but you were still gone. Wendy, where did you go?" Adam was watching me closely as I wondered how the fuck I was going to answer his question.
"My relative held me up. I told you that already. He grabbed Wyatt as well, though I don't quite understand. What did Wyatt say?" I said, trying not to bite my tongue or look nervous.
"He said the same thing. Lucia also said the pregnancy test was for her." Adam's voice was back to neutral.
"My relative was strange, and I thought only a few hours had passed. I wouldn't have stayed away that long had I known otherwise." This might seem like a wild tale to anyone else. Still, with all that I've experienced and Adam had seen, unquestionably he'd believe me.
Oh, my gods. He didn't. I could see mistrust in his eyes when he looked at me, and my heart cracked a little.
"You told Lucia that I'm not your life partner," Adam said accusingly.
Lucia wouldn't have told on me I would bet the farm on that. That meant, "You were in Wyatt's room, weren't you." That noise I heard after I mentioned the pregnancy test likely came from that. "Why didn't you come out to join us?"
"Don't change the subject, Wendy." Adam grabbed my face and locked eyes with me. "Why did you say you're not good enough for me then disappear for two weeks?"
It was obvious that my actions looked extremely bad when you put it into that context. I thought as our noses touched. "I didn't say anything about going away because I didn't plan on going anywhere."
"Why did you say those things to Lucia?" Adam's voice was thick with emotion, and I could feel myself wavering.
I'd been delaying this, but honestly, there were a slew of reasons. Things that hadn't quite added up when it came to Adam, and the truth of the matter is…why were there so many blank spots in my knowledge of him?
"You keep me separate from half your life, Adam. What was I supposed to think?" My voice was steady. These thoughts weren't known and only gained traction as I dwelled on them. I had yet to meet his sister or his father. Heck, I didn't even know their names. I didn't know his last name, and there was so much more. I had no idea where his home was or what he lived like when I wasn't there. I had half the blame because I never tried to break into that part of his world. If he wasn't holding the door to let me into it then maybe he didn't want me there...
He separated me completely from a part of his life that mattered to him.
Adam had a stunned expression, and instead of answering, he flopped his head on my chest. "I'm not keeping you separate because I plan on finding a wife."
"But you are keeping me separate. And there's things you're not telling me." I said. If we're going to get this all out into the air, then let's air out this duvet of issues properly.
Adam said something against my skin, but all I felt was the prickling sensation of his beard.
"Adam," I said, giving into the desire to dig my hands into his hair. It was harder to do with the tie on my wrists, but his luscious brown locks were worth it.
"I'm doing it to keep you safe from it all." He said, barely lifting his gaze to stare at me.
"Safe from what?" I persisted, unwilling to reach my conclusion until the tight-lipped man said it all.
"You're pure, Wendy, far too pure for that lifestyle. It's full of malice and power-grubbing people."
"It's your world, Adam," I said, my voice as soft as the hands running through his hair.
"I don't want you to know that side of me. The side of me that thrives among that kind of people." He said, turning his face so I couldn't see his expression. He looked adorable and snuggled on my bare chest.
"I'm not blind. I saw it from the start. You've become gentler without your bodyguards, but you've never been subtle." I said, recalling our first few meetings and how he commanded without a word. What he managed to do wasn't something a normal kid could accomplish.
"Didn't you say the world would end? And that the trappings from the past wouldn't matter? So why is that holding you back? All we have is time on our side." Adam said.
I did the one time I accidentally got drunk a few months ago. I said a lot of things I shouldn't have then.
"I don't care about the trappings. I care about you. There's so much I don't know when it comes to you. I feel like these secrets will break us up." I said and looked down. Adam's place was in this world. That meant he had a predetermined partner somewhere, right? Anxiety had bloomed like a green flower in my heart and was making it hard to breathe when he wasn't here.
"They won't." He said with a severe look that could have been part of a cologne ad. That simple assurance from him would have customarily killed that little green flower of envy, but today, it only grew. That envious flower knew this man initially belonged to someone else. I was a thief taking him from whoever this world designed for him. That lucky woman.
What would happen when that woman appeared? She had to be beautifully perfect, intelligent, and wealthy to be with Adam. There's no way someone as amazing as Adam would have anything less than the best.
I'm not sure that girl is me. I looked at Adam as these thoughts ran rampant in my head. It was time to continue being as selfish as possible. I didn't want to let him go. Even when that girl made an appearance. I was going to hold on tight to Adam. My silence made Adam wary because he sat up to examine my face.
"You will know everything in time. I'll tell you anything you want to know." Adam said. He sat up and grabbed me by the back of my neck. He massaged it as he rubbed our noses together and untied me.
"I told you all those years prior that I wouldn't fall in love with someone else. I'm already yours." Adam pulled away and gave a rather roguish smile as he left the bed.
I blinked on the bed, wondering when he would have said that. As realization dawned on me, I tried to run after him. I tripped on the sheets and almost landed flat on my face. He caught me, appearing just before my nose hit the floor.
Adam rarely chuckled, and I should be savoring the sweet, blessed sound, but I couldn't.
"That wasn't a fever dream?" I grabbed his chest, trying not to ogle at the fact that he was still naked.
All I got in response was a smile.
I chased after Adam when he left to go to the bathroom and was promptly distracted by kisses. We had a brief intermission in which we both had too much fun in the bath cleaning up. Adam followed me into my walk-in closet, but instead of staring at my bras or undies, he looked at a dress I had hanging. It was out of place with the rest because it was front and center. I had made it with the plan to wear it to my birthday party.
Adam was holding part of it with a strange concentration. It wasn't because I messed it up. I have to say it was rather well done. I managed to stitch in Originis and some of the other Unruly trees in great detail. I left out the scarring my attempts at magic had created in the bark. I felt a little off about that, but no one else had found the tree. My friends were knowledgeable in the woods but not that versed. I was the only one who knew better what the tree truly looked like.
He let go of it, and his standard mask was on his face. Before I could say anything, he distracted me by grabbing me close.
It took some time for us to finally emerge clean of body and dress from my room.
I had Adam sitting down at the table while I worked on what to cook.
"What do you want to eat?" I looked at what I had on hand. I was gone for two weeks, so the food was likely expired. I found, however, that things had been restocked. I poked my head out of the fridge to catch Adam smiling a little too smugly.
"It seems like I have just the right ingredients for beef stew." My lips quivered as I spoke. That was Adam's favorite meal. The first meal I made, and it was what he ate when we first met, too.
"How fortuitous," Adam said.
He stocked the fridge and waited for me. "You knew I was coming back?" I said. Did Adam have any doubts? How was I the only one that did about us?
He came up to me then and engulfed me in his arms. "I knew you were coming back. I wouldn't be here if you didn't."
Before I could respond, there was a knock at the door. And someone for whom I had one thousand and one questions appeared.