The usually thirty minute long run from our apartment building to the gym took just half the time despite deep snow and ice, yet my breathing was calm and relaxed when I stepped inside the automatic doors. My body honestly felt amazing after the minor exertion, and I was looking forward to a couple of hours doing some proper physical activity after almost seven days of rest.
Unless you count me beating up a diseased criminal as ‘proper’ physical activity.
I shuddered, and made an attempt to shake the thought out of my head, which only resulted in a flurry of snowflakes falling from my hair. Steam rose from my warm skin as the frozen crystals melted in the controlled air temperature, and hit me as droplets of cold water. The running had worked as an excellent warm up, and I was eager to get the warm winter clothes off.
Inside Supernova’s lobby were a few other people either getting ready to start their workout, or coming out from one. There were more people than I was used to, and while the room was plenty large enough for me to not overhear any conversations, it still felt a little cramped in there.
“Holy shit, Ashton!?” The sudden words came from an open door, where I saw neon green hair wrapped in a tight ponytail, sticking out behind a stack of boxes that were being carried by who I could only assume was Tyler. The boxes were quickly dropped, and sure enough, behind them was the familiar face of Tyler, although with a new and unfamiliar hair color.
I thought I’d try to say something clever, but before I got the chance, she rushed forward and grabbed my shoulders. Her usual perfect service provider smile was gone, exchanged for a wide, white toothed grin. The joy on her face surprised me, and I could feel my ears burn at the genuineness of it all. Then she spoke.
“You’re actually here! I heard from your sister that you survived the explosion, but I kind of thought you’d died in the coma after not hearing anything else. You’re incredible, dude!” Okay, correction, she was screaming. Several people looked over at her outburst, but she didn’t seem to mind. I was too busy wishing the floor would open and swallow me whole to do anything else than hiding my face in my jacket collar. I could hear murmurs from the watching crowd, and people from inside the training studio were looking at us through the glass wall.
The exhilaration from my run was gone. The walls felt too close, I was dizzy, and a low buzzing hum in my ears was slowly growing louder. The relaxing chat I’d fantasized about on the way here was quickly turning into a nightmare, and all I wanted was to run away and hide.
“Hey, are you alright?” Tyler asked. Her voice sounded muffled. I wanted to just nod my head like a normal guy, and say it was fine, but I couldn’t. I knew there’d be more people here than when I usually came to work out, but the stares and whispers almost paralyzed me. I shook my head, still hiding my face in my jacket.
Tyler turned her head side to side, finally noticing all the faces turned in our direction.
“It’s all of them, isn’t it,” she said quietly, so only I could hear. I nodded again, daring to look up from the floor and into her eyes. They looked serious. She nodded back, once, then grabbed my arm and spun around, pulling me along with her.
“If anyone needs something from the front desk it will have to wait,” she said at the room, then she stuck her head just past the glass door into the studio. “If anyone asks, I’m in a meeting!” Several hands rose to indicate they’d heard her incredibly loud shout, and one dude shouted back, “No sweat, Ty, I’ll get the front in a sec!”
“Thanks!” She turned and crossed the floor, still dragging me after her, and opened one of the ‘Staff Only’ doors on the side.
“There, all alone,” she said after closing the door behind us and turning on the lights. It was a medium sized staff lounge, with a small kitchen, a couple of couches and two work desks next to a shelf full of fitness products. I looked around the little room, and eventually let go of the tension in my shoulders after making sure there really were no one else in there with us. Tyler had walked over to the fridge, and had pulled out what looked like a bag of dried grass, which she zipped open and poured some in a cup.
“Take your shoes off over there, and hang your jacket on that pole,” she said and pointed at the back of the room. I did as I was told. In the meantime Tyler poured water in a boiler, then set the thing to heat up. By the time I’d sat down on the nearest couch the water was fully bubbling, and she poured it over the leaves in the mug. She stirred it with a spoon, and when she set the mug in front of me the leaves were gone, and the water had a dark golden color to it.
“Drink it,” she said and sat down in the couch opposite mine. “Uhm… What is it?” I asked. “It’s tea,” she said, as if I knew what that meant. My confusion must have been plain on my face because she chuckled lightly, then smiled reassuringly. “It’s something I learned about from my grandmother. She worked with plants back in the day.” She leaned forward and dipped a finger into the steaming liquid. She pulled it back out almost as soon as her skin broke the surface.
“Ooh, yep, still hot!”
She put the finger in her mouth and sucked it for a second, before pulling it out and blowing on it. I did my best not to stare. The whole situation felt incredibly surreal.
“Mm, okay, so, you know how some plants are used for medicine and stuff, and how others can be used for spices and things? Well, my grandmother taught me how to dry and mix a whole bunch of different types of leaves and herbs to make this.” She gestured at the drink in the mug in front of me. I bent over the cup and smelled the contents. There was in fact an aroma of herbs in the scent I smelled, but there was no chance I could identify whatever the ingredients were.
“Smells good, right?” She said, smiling eagerly. “Just wait until you taste it. It’s gonna be faint, but that’s kind of the point of it.”
“Faint how?" I asked.
“You’ll see,” she said. “It’s meant to sort of be the spiritual opposite to coffee. It doesn’t necessarily make you sleepy, at least not this blend, but it does calm you down.” She looked me up and down, her eyes lingering at my tense shoulders. “Trust me, it’ll be good for you.”
I eyed her somewhat suspiciously, but reached out and grabbed the mug.
“Sip it carefully, our water cooker is industrial grade,” she said with a bit of added drama to her voice. She was a lot calmer than I’d expected from a woman like her. Judging by the loud colors she wore, her personality among other people, and the casual way she would dance to the music on the gym speaker system, I’d always thought of her as the wild, extrovert type. Don’t get me wrong, I liked that side of her, but at the moment I very much appreciated the calm, gentle way she was acting.
I lifted the cup to my lips and tasted the drink she’d made me. At first it tasted a little bitter, kind of like coffee, but it was a lot smoother. Tyler watched quietly while I held the cup and tried to identify all the flavors I was tasting. I couldn’t place a single one, so I did the next best thing I could think of, and started chugging.
“Woah, hey, take it easy,” Tyler said and reached out reflexively. She stopped herself halfway to avoid bumping into me, and watched as I emptied the cup in a final gulp.
“Dude, that was boiling a minute ago! How did you not burn your whole mouth right now?” Tyler was staring at me wide eyed. I winced. I’d forgotten about my apparent immunity to temperatures.
“I’m okay, I drink a lot of coffee, so I’m pretty used to the heat,” I said, trying my best to sound reassuring. “Besides, I think it helped. I feel alot better now, so, uh… thank you.”
She eyed me for a second, then slowly leaned back into the seat cushions. “You’re welcome,” she said, still studying my face. Her eyes softened then, and she gave a light sigh, before crossing over to come sit in the same couch as me. I scooched over to give her extra room. She smiled at that, then sat down, leaning sideways on the seat.
“So,” she said in a more serious voice. “Are you gonna tell me what happened? Out there, I mean.” She gestured towards the door to the entrance hall. “I heard from your sister what happened at Lodestar. Kinda why I thought you were dead. Sorry.” She smirked apologetically and looked away. “It’s… Don’t worry ‘bout it. I’m tougher than I look, I guess,” I said, and smirked back. It was weird, the blunt way she spoke about Lodestar made it easy to just brush it off. Or at least, not feel so depressing.
“Well, maybe physically,” I continued. I didn’t love having this conversation. It reminded me of all the things I didn’t like about myself, and I hated how it meant I still needed to do something about it. Still, I’d done it before, I could do it again.
“It’s what you guessed, really,” I began. Tyler inched closer on the couch, probably because I was speaking down at my feet, trying to avoid being seen.
“I don’t handle people very well. Groups, specifically.” I picked at my nails. “I do fine with individuals, and I can handle it at my job, but if there are a lot of people somewhere, I generally stay away. That’s why I try to come here in the mornings, when there's less… People.” I sighed.
She waited silently for me to continue, giving me space to breathe and think. I lifted my head and inhaled deeply though my nose, then exhaled through my mouth. I repeated the process twice more, then continued.
“I have this irrational fear of letting people down, and if I ever become the center of attention in any kind of way, it compounds several times over. I can’t handle the pressure of somehow providing a conclusion to their attention that would satisfy their reason for giving it, so I do my best to stay unnoticed.”
The words came slowly, and I had to sometimes stop and consider the best way to phrase it in a way that sounded coherent. I didn’t have all that much practice explaining this issue. Deimos had asked about it before, and I’d told him some, but he quickly inferred the general meaning, and had decided to act as a wall if the need would arise.
No more of that anymore either. Unless that was just another lie. Fuck… I miss my friend.
“I just want to live a nice life, where I can spend my time how I want, without having to justify my existence to the world,” I said, and finally looked at Tyler. She was still leaning sideways, head resting in her hand, with a small smile that curled up and behind her palm.
Cute, I thought quietly.
“That’s everything?” Tyler asked after a couple seconds.
“More or less. There are nuances. Some people are worse than others, stuff like that.” I leaned sideways to fully face her. “I handle things like this just fine, although I had to work at it from when I was a kid. You are never gonna see me do public speaking, though.” She laughed at that. I chuckled too, but felt my cheeks flush just a little, nonetheless. I dragged a hand through my hair, pulling the still dewy spikes out of my face. The hum in my ears had completely died down, and I was breathing steady again.
“I think I’m… I feel a lot better now. Thank you.” Tyler grinned and grabbed me by the shoulder. “Good,” she said. “I’m glad to be of help. You can come talk to me whenever I got time, alright?” I nodded and smiled back at her.
“Speaking of time, I need to get back to work soon. Are you going to be alright?” She held my gaze, smiling at me. “I will be.”
“Good,” she said and slapped me hard on the back. “Because your pre-workout shake has been waiting for you for way too long, and I have a kickass list playing over the speakers right now!”
“You’re right. I was coming here to get a workout after all. Can’t let a coma get in the way of my health, right?” I tried sounding cool, but I’m pretty sure it came off a little dorky. Tyler smiled anyway, so I guess it wasn’t a complete failure.
“Hell yeah, there we go!” She rose from the couch and started towards the door. “You can change and leave your stuff here. Just call my name when you’re done training, and I’ll unlock the door for you. It auto locks when closed, but can always be opened from inside. See you out there!”
Then she was gone, out the door. I looked after her for a few seconds, then picked my bag up and got changed.
I am gonna crush this workout!
⬨⬨⬨
With a lighter mood, and fresh caffeine coursing through me, I entered the training studio of Supernova Gym. I’d gotten a little stiff from sitting and talking to Tyler, so I warmed up with another run on the treadmill. Physically I still felt amazing, and as soon as I started running I quickly pushed the speed past my usual pace. Minute after minute went by faster and faster, while my feet thundered along the wide rubber lane of the treadmill. I ran four kilometers in record time, clearing the distance in only ten minutes. And I could probably have gone faster.
I got off the treadmill breathing a little quicker than normal, but not by much. I took a sip from my water bottle and wiped down the interface panel, then headed over to the large area for bodyweight training. I did some stretching and basic exercises, and once again I managed to go way past anything I’d ever managed before.
My body felt light and flexible, as well as strong and solid, all at the same time. On top of that it felt like I had endless stamina, and at some point I just stopped counting each squat or pushup, figuring I’d stop when I got bored. I usually trained like this to make sure every part of me was properly warm and limber, but I still hadn’t broken a sweat. Not that I wasn’t warm, however. In fact, I felt like I could dive into a tub of dry ice and take a nap.
I should probably have been a little more worried about… well, me, I guess. If I had seen anyone else do the things I did that day, I would suspect them of some form of cheating, either mechanical or medicinal. There were several reliable ways to exceed the human limit, both physically and mentally. Stimulants were expensive, sure, but people would do anything to gain an edge. International relief forces were supported by doctors to make sure they always operated to the best of their ability. Heroes dodged the stigma even further, being sponsored by many of the manufacturers, and their respective governments. A hero failing their duty reflected poorly on their cities leaders, whose responsibility it was to make sure they were able to do their job. “Bulwark against forces of Evil” and all that.
I was no hero, though. No government would ever bankroll an ordinary citizen, much less me. I was just some guy. A guy who felt like he was on fucking fire.
I walked away from the bodyweight section after doing a double set of my planned program. I considered going on one of the machines I usually used for just a second, then made a sharp turn towards the free weight area. Large stacks of plates, dumbbells and metal bars were organized by weight, and the area was populated by absolutely huge men. The intimidation factor of this area was enough to keep me from working out there when it was full. I only did free weight lifts if it was almost empty, that way I didn’t have to ask anyone how much they had left, or if a bench was taken.
This time I ignored them all. I walked in there and sat down in one of the squat racks, and pulled my shoes off. Despite the intense warm up and bodyweight work I’d already done, I hadn’t broken a sweat, and no odor came from my feet. So I tossed my shoes to the sides, grabbed a nearby bar and got ready to squat. Habit demanded a warm up set with just the bar across my shoulders, but once that was done I went to the stack of weights and pulled off two 20kg plates. It would be heavy, sure, but nothing I couldn’t handle.
Before, my maximum squat weight was around a hundred and twenty kilograms. Not extremely impressive, but respectable enough. I could probably have gotten up to one-thirty with some help, but I didn’t want to bother anyone for a spot, and when I trained with Deimos I blamed soreness for not pushing my hardest. In all honesty I was scared. Scared I would fail and need help. Scared I would hurt myself, or worse. Scared that, if something wrong happened, it would affect everyone at the gym. I couldn’t handle that, so I just accepted never reaching my full potential. But that was before.
On the bar were two 20kg plates on either side, with 10kg plates on top of that, also on both sides. With the bar itself being twenty kilograms, I was now carrying one hundred and twenty kilograms across my shoulders. I took a deep breath, then bent my knees and hip, going into a deep squat.
Okay, this feels lighter than expected… a lot lighter, actually.
Let’s see how it is on the way up.
I tightened my stomach, activated my thighs, and began pushing as hard as I dared. I felt my feet press firmly against the floor, and it was almost like it gave way, as I quickly shot up to a standing position. Suddenly that firm press of the floor against my feet disappeared, as I’d pushed so hard I actually jumped. With a hundred and twenty kilograms on my back.
It wasn’t high, only about a centimeter, but for half a second it was like gravity had just let me go. Then I landed, and had to take a quick, stabilizing step backwards so I wouldn’t fall. A grin crept its way onto my face, and I reset my position. With relative ease I did another nine repetitions, then put the bar back on the pins that held it in place. I stared blankly at myself in the mirror in front of me. I looked… bigger. Not just physically, there was something else too. Something I couldn’t explain. Silver eyes stared back from my reflection.
Are my eyes… glowing?
It was hard to catch, but I saw it. In the deep recesses of my pupils, a tiny pinprick of light shone. Like a single star on a clear night sky. The more I looked, the more I realized that my iris was glowing as well, like someone was shining a weak nightlight inside my skull. It was almost imperceptible, but I swear I saw it. A second or two later, it faded, and my eyes were normal again.
Still silver, though, as if that wasn’t reason enough for concern.
I looked away.
Weight. I need more weight.
Reading on this site? This novel is published elsewhere. Support the author by seeking out the original.
I left the safety of my squat rack and ventured out between the other strong lifters, looking for any unused stacks of weight I could find. In a few moments I’d built several small towers around my rack, then started adding them to the bar. It quickly filled up on either side, with the plates growing smaller and lighter towards the ends, until the last plates only weighed two-point-five kilogram. That still left me with a couple of extra plates that wouldn’t fit on the bar, unless I switched some out.
Don’t look, I told myself, again and again. You can’t be anxious if you don’t look.
If I failed, the pins would save me from being crushed by the bar, and I would just have to accept that. But if I succeeded… Well, let’s just say I’d be able to put my name up on the record wall.
The bar pressed down hard across my neck and shoulders as I wedged myself under it. I was facing away from the mirror, trying to focus on nothing but the weight on my back. The bar bent on either side as I pressed my feet down and stood up. The metal bounced lightly as I took a single step forward. I took a deep breath, and bent down.
The weight immediately threatened to break my posture, and I fought to keep myself from collapsing. The further down I got, the harder I had to fight, and when I finally got far enough to stop, it felt like my feet were digging into the sole of my shoes. My toes curled hard, trying to find more grip, and my legs shook with the exertion of just staying upright enough not to fall. A loud groan born of desperate effort escaped my lips, and I saw a couple other guys turn their heads toward me.
No no, not now, I begged silently. I was stuck.
“Hey man, need a spot?”
I don’t know who asked. I grunted a response to the negative, but two burly guys quickly jogged over anyway. All I saw was their shoes as they carefully approached me. A pair of white sneakers with a blue circle, and a red and blue pair with elevated heel pads.
“Dude, you got this,” I heard one of them say encouragingly. Elevated heel pad, I thought.
“Sheesh, he’s been holding that position forever,” I hear from White Sneakers. “This guy’s fuckin’ radiates, bro!”
I tried to ignore their comments, but they kept hyping me up, trying to help me focus. It was not working very well, and my legs were starting to give. I had to get up quickly, or I’d fail.
“Bro, just take a deep breath. I can see you’re struggling, but we got you.” It was Elevated Heel again. “You just focus on standing up, got it?”
“Can’t.” I grunted. "Legs. Failing.” A red outline tinted the edge of my vision.
“Don’t worry about your legs, bro,” came from White Sneaker. “It’s just gravity tryin’ to keep you down. Don’t succumb to the world like that, trust in your muscles to do what they were made for. Just stand up.” He spoke in a deep calm, but commanding voice, as if what he was saying wasn’t merely a suggestion.
Don’t succumb to gravity? Just stand up!? What in the absolute-
“Three, two, one, UP!” They barked in unison. The word shocked me so much I almost forgot where I was and what I was doing, but in doing so they gave me a strange form of clarity I had never experienced before.
Just ignore it. All of it. The noise, the light, the weight. Stand up.
I pushed.
Just stand up.
Everything around me went still. Not like my vision went black, or my ears turned deaf, or anything like that. Everything literally stopped around me as I straightened my legs and calmly stood up. Then the world started moving again, but slowly, like it was catching itself back up to speed. The same happened to all sounds, like they had stopped, and were now spinning back up. The only sound I heard clearly was the vibrating hum in my ears that seemed to come from inside my own head.
I turned my head from side to side, taking in my surroundings in the stillness. The bar was still bending under the weight of all the plates, but it had stopped digging into me, and I felt my grip relax. Next to me I saw the excited faces of two regular gym bros, a blond, green-eyed guy in a black tank top and white sneakers, and a black haired, red-eyed man in a brown hoodie with red and blue shoes with elevated heels.
It felt like I had to look up at them, which was strange because I was certain they were both around my own height. Then I looked down at the floor again.
It seemed to me like I was standing in a smooth crater, like a small breakfast bowl, with only a very slight curve upwards. The curve was even flattening out as I watched, at the same pace that sound and motion returned to normal. In a matter of seconds the stillness passed, leaving me to wonder if it had ever even happened.
“Woah!”
“Shit, watch out!”
The surprised exclamations from the gym bros confused me. I’d been stable the whole time, but they acted like I’d almost hit them with the bar on the way up. I stumbled back a step, and felt the bar stop as it clanged against the metal of the rack. The weight shifted on to the pins, and I released my grip and sat down on my knees. I inhaled deeply, then stood up slowly while I exhaled. I wasn’t tired at all.
“Dude, it ain’t cool to pretend like that,” said the blond guy with the white sneakers. “I thought you were really struggling there, me and Vince were ready to catch you anytime. Then all of a sudden you get up so fast I thought you were gonna leap off the floor. I mean, it looked effortless!” His buddy nodded along, looking suspiciously at the plates on my bar.
“I’m sorry,” I said. “But I really was struggling. I was stuck at the bottom and couldn’t get up, but then you came and told me to just stand up, so uh…” I trailed off, not really knowing how to explain what had happened.
The blond guy raised an eyebrow at me, then he gave the other guy, Vince, a questioning look. Vince, who had taken a couple of plates off of the bar, shook his head in response, confusion and wonder apparent on his face.
“Stand up?” the blonde said incredulously. “You just ‘stood up’ with almost two hundred and sixty kilos across your back, after struggling at the bottom for nearly half a minute?!” He crossed his arms over his wide chest and scowled skeptically at me. Vince came back after putting my weights down and started whispering something to the blonde guy.
Two hundred and… what?
I counted the weights on the bar, including those Vince had taken off. The blonde guy was right, it summed up to two hundred and fifty seven and a half kilograms of weight, all in all. Definitely a new personal best.
“Sorry for asking this, but you’re not, you know… sponsored, are you?”
It was Vince’s turn to ask, and by the look of it he felt quite guilty about the question. To be fair, I would have thought the same if I saw someone like me suddenly do something like that.
“No, absolutely not, I promise. I’m far from being important or famous enough for anything like that,” I answered sheepishly. All these questions and suspicions made me uneasy, and I just wanted this whole thing over with. “I’m all organic.”
Or, as organic as someone without a pulse can be, I guess.
The last few days had not exactly reinforced my confidence about what was happening to me.
The two burly guys looked at each other, seemingly coming to some form of agreement, then turned back to me. They were both looking at me with a hard, serious expression. A spike of dread shot up my spine as Vince grabbed me by the shoulders and locked his red eyes with mine.
“We’re sorry we doubted you,” he said.
What?
Another hand slapped me on the back.
“Yeah, we apologize,” said the blonde man.
Expardon me?
My head spun with contradicting emotions. I was sure these tank-like men were about to rip me to shreds and throw me out on the street. This complete one-eighty was the last thing I’d expected. The apologies were so genuine, I had no idea what to say, so I defaulted to what I usually did in situations like these.
“Huh?” I said, with all the wisdom and confidence I owned. Which was none.
“Let’s start over,” said the blonde guy. “Hi, my name is Donald, or Don to my friends. This is Vincent.” He waved his hand at his friend. Vincent smiled. I nodded slowly.
“We saw you warm up earlier, and we were very impressed with your routine. It’s rare to see someone take their bodyweight training that seriously, and then move on as if it was a light jog. I mean, you look pretty athletic, but that was some Equinox level effort.”
That was incredibly high praise. I was so confused.
“Yeah, I took you for some kind of gymnast, or martial artist at first.” It was Vincent’s turn to speak. “Kinda blew me away when you started repping out one-twenty like it was a paperweight.” He nodded approvingly, but stopped and made a face as he considered his next words. “Buuut we got kinda concerned when you more than doubled it. We thought you had bit off a little more than you could chew, so we wanted to step in and help you out. You even said so yourself, right? You couldn’t get up.”
I just kind of stood there, waiting for the other shoe to drop.
What the fuck is happening right now?
I didn’t understand why they were being so nice to me. I still wasn’t saying anything either, mostly out of not knowing what to say, but that seemed just fine with the two gym bros.
“And look, we have tons of experience with situations like that,” Vince continued. He was getting fired up. “And once that happens, the best thing to do is just block the world out and push as hard as you can. Focus on that one thing you have to do, and then let your body follow that signal, and nothing else.”
“But then you surprise us by not just getting up, you make it look easy!” Donald said. “No offense, but you don’t exactly look like the type of guy who could do that, and so we thought… well, you know.” Donald trailed off , but Vince quickly picked up again. He seemed to be the better talker amongst the two.
“It’s hard to forget that it’s not always about mass and strength. There’s technique, breathing, your mental state, muscle recruitment, all those things that might seem small, but that really adds up, right? So, we figure, obviously you know something we don’t.” The way his face lit up like a childs on their birthday gave me the impression that he, and probably Donald as well, took their gym time very seriously. I had a bad feeling I knew what Vince was about to say.
“Come work out with us, and teach us what that is!”
“If you can, of course!” Donald quickly added to Vincent’s plea. I stared at them, slack jawed, eyes flicking between them.
Shit.
⬨⬨⬨
Donald and Vincent were actually pretty calm guys. It turned out they were twins, and had been training partners since forever. Kept them motivated and driven, Vincent had said. Looked to me like it worked wonders. Both had wives and a couple of kids, worked full time jobs, and were a few years younger than me, but still they had stellar physiques.
They looked like professional athletes, with thick thighs, wide chests, and arms so defined they were like carved rock. On top of all that they were both very handsome men, and it all accumulated into making me very unaccomplished and uncomfortable.
After my initial shock and confusion faded, I managed to hesitantly explain what seemed to happen the second they had shouted at me to get up. I was worried they wouldn’t believe me when I told them about how the world had stopped moving, and how the sensation of weight just evaporated, but they just nodded along, as if it was something that could just happen whenever.
“It’s pretty normal for weightlifters to go through something like that when they get in the zone, know what I mean?” Donald said. Vincent nodded along with a serious expression, as if this was some profound wisdom.
“Get in the zone,” I echoed. I’d heard the expression before, but mostly only used by older generations. “I think I get it, that’s when you find an acute sense of focus that lets you perform difficult things better, right?”
“That’s the idea,” said Vince. “Some people do it by playing familiar music, others through a series of breathing techniques.” He sat up on the bench he was lying on, turning his head sideways so as not to collide with the metal bar resting on the raised handles.
“Personally, me and Don prefer aggro.”
“Aggro?”
"Aggression." Donald explained simply. I still wasn’t following. “Here, watch.” He motioned for Vincent to get back under the bar, then took up a position at the top, where Vincent’s head laid. He helped Vincent pick the bar up, and then crouched with his hands held forward, ready to help at any time. It was loaded to a total of a hundred and forty kilos.
“You stable?” Donald asked.
“Yup.” Vincent sucked in a deep breath, just like I always did.
“Good,” Donald said, his voice low and husky. “Now go get your hate.”
I blinked, dumbfounded.
“Get your hate, and shove it, shove all of it, into that bar. That bar is nothing but steel and pain. Use your pain, Vince, and twist that fucking steel into a useless pile of scrapmetal.”
Donalds words were quiet, almost a whisper, but I still felt the intense force behind them, as Vincent lowered the bar slowly to his chest, then pressed it back up with a roar.
“Hnnnnggraaah!” Loud and quick, the sound scared me, but also fascinated me. There was so much emotion and personality in the way the large man handled the weight in his hands. Muscles rippled, and striations ran under his skin as it was pulled, taught under the power of his movements. The bar lowered and rose several times, before eventually Donald grabbed the bar and pulled it back to the handles above the bench.
“Good work,” Donald told his brother, then turned to me. “See that? That’s aggro. I know it can be a little scary-looking and stuff, but it’s what works best for us.” I swallowed, and looked at Vincent, who was sitting up and stretching his arms over his head. “Sorry ‘bout the noise, I kinda forget there’s other people around,” he said.
“No problem.” I stared at the heavy bar. I wanted to try, but I was nervous. “I don’t know if I understand it, but at the same time it makes sense.” It wasn’t about pushing yourself to do something, it was about letting go of the world around you, and just do it. Then the world had no choice but to be affected by the power you owned, no matter how big or small that effect was. Once you could make that happen at will, you could progress and expand upon it.
“Dude, are you okay?” I vaguely heard one of the twins say. “Uh-huh,” I answered without looking at either of them. My brain felt like a storm. Neurons were firing on all cylinders in a hurricane of thought, and in the eye was a bead of silver light, blinding me from the inside.
“Don, wait, don’t touch him,” said Vincent. “Give the man some space. I think Ashton just had an epiphany.” I started walking towards Vincent, who jumped off the bench to give me space.
“You sure about that? He looks kind of… blank. Hey, Ashton, mind telling us what’s going on in there? Are you good?” Donald was concerned for me, which was nice of him, but ultimately a waste of time. I didn’t really register it. I didn’t have room for distractions.
“Let go of the world, and trust the muscles to do the work,” I mumbled, as the raging storm inside me grew wilder.
“See, I told you he realized something,” Vincent remarked, somewhere far away. I laid down and slipped my hands around the steel of the bar above my face. It felt warm as my fingers squeezed it. I braced my shoulders against the bench, and took a deep breath. The storm in my mind came to a dead stop, and right as I pressed the bar up from its handles, I heard Donald's voice with total clarity.
“Is it just me, or are his eyes glowing?”
Yeah, apparently they do that sometimes, I thought to myself, and lowered the bar gently to my chest. It laid there for a solid second. Then I sucked in a sharp breath, and lifted the bar with such force, that when it reached the end of how far my arms could stretch, the momentum lifted me off the bench for a split second, before gravity reclaimed control, and slammed me back onto the thin cushion that separated my back from the metal surface of the bench itself.
I held the bar there, in that outstretched position, and saw that once again the world had stopped moving. Everywhere I looked felt like looking ‘up’, and the surface of the bench bent under my weight. I blinked my eyes, and it was over. The world was back to normal, and the storm in my head was gone. A hand closed around the bar and pulled it back onto the rack, and I let go of it. I sat up and stared down into my hands, then rubbed them together. It was like touching a smoldering furnace, but it didn’t hurt.
“How was that?” I asked absentmindedly.
“That looked… good.” Donald remarked hesitantly from behind me. “Your form could use some work when you lift off from the rack, but otherwise no notes. Tell me, what do you usually do most at the gym?” I had to think about that for a bit.
“Well, I try to do as much as I can.” I answered honestly. “I run, I do bodyweight training, sometimes I do some basic martial arts stuff, and then I lift. Mostly legs or shoulders.” I tried to gauge Donald’s reaction, but I didn’t know the man well enough to decipher more than his friendly smile. I found it weird that some people could just be that jovial and sociable, but then I thought about Emily. She was also like that, so maybe I shouldn’t judge too much.
“That’s a tough routine, you must have great endurance,” said Vincent as he re-racked a couple of dumbbells. “I guess so. I used to be in pretty bad shape a few years ago. A friend helped me start working out. Taught me what to do and how to do it, and eventually I learned to really like it.”
Donald chuckled. “No better way to start than getting dragged along by a friend, huh? Bet you two are pretty close.” I frowned slightly. Images of Deimos flashed through my mind from all the good times we’d had, all the way up to our last moment of friendship, laughing together in the hotel room provided to him by Lodestar at the convention.
“Yeah,” I mumbled quietly. “Pretty close.” The twins shared a concerned look at that, but I didn’t want to ruin the mood any further. I slapped my cheeks with both hands and raised my voice.
“Never mind any of that, we’re here to train, right? Give me those dumbbells, Vince, let’s get serious.”
I didn’t care to wait for a response, but the gym bros were quick to pick up on my vibe. Before long we were all standing with weights in our hands, determined to do our best. We spoke little, and in the silence I tried focusing like I’d done before, and let go of the world around me, but I couldn’t quite get it. I finished the workout without any more flashes of inspiration.
When we finished the twins went straight to the showers, but not before making me promise to work out with them again sometime. I saved Vincent’s contact info on my band before they left, then went to go stretch. I’d been working out for a little over two hours at that point, but I still showed no signs of fatigue. It felt like my body was able to keep going like that for several more hours, and I probably would have too, if it wasn’t for the growing hunger I soon had to deal with.
At least that never changes. Small victories, I guess.
“Hey there.”
“Gah!”
“Sorry! Sorry, it’s just me,” said Tyler as she took a step back, trying to hide her wide grin behind her hands. She must have snuck up on me, because I hadn’t heard any footsteps coming my way. I grabbed her outstretched hand and let her pull me up from the floor I’d fallen down on.
“I didn’t mean to scare you that bad,” she said while choking down a fit of laughter. “You just looked so focused with your eyes closed like that, I couldn’t help myself.” She stuck her tongue out and winked at me. I coughed and looked away, trying to hide how shy she made me feel.
“It’s fine, you’re not that scary,” I said, acting cool. “You just startled me.”
“Alright, whatever you say.” She smiled slyly. “Anyway, who were those guys you were working out with today?” She waved a sleek hand at the free weight area.
“Donald and Vincent. They’re twins. For some reason they took an interest in me, and helped me figure some stuff out. Strange guys, but nice enough after a little while. They seemed really serious about their fitness, and even asked for my input.”
“Huh.” Tyler looked out towards the reception, one hand on her hip. “Are they friends of yours?” Her tone was slightly apprehensive as she surveyed the gym, one section at a time.
“Not, really. I met them today. Why, is something wrong?”
“Come with me,” she said, then grabbed my arm before I had the chance to react. She took me to the front desk, and sat me down next to her as she got on the computer. “What were their names again?”
“Donald and Vincent.” She typed in the first name on the keypad beneath the screen, and a list of people named Donald appeared. There were more than I’d expected, around eleven or twelve. Some basic information was listed beside each person, like date of birth, contact information and membership status. After staring at the short list for about a minute, Tyler opened a new window and made a new search, typing in Vincent’s name this time.
Another list appeared, however this one was much shorter. Only three names appeared.
“Okay, at least this’ll be easy,” Tyler mumbled as she read the information next to the names. With a motion of her wrist the two lists aligned next to each other in individual windows. She studied them back and forth for a bit, then slumped into her chair, rubbing her neck.
“What’s up?” I asked. She pointed at the two lists in front of us. “You know I’m here pretty much all the time, right?” I nodded. “And because of that I see pretty much every face that comes through those doors. Except…” she hesitated and bit her bottom lip.
“Except what?” I was getting extremely curious. “Except,” she let go of her lip and looked at me. “I have never seen them here before.” I eyed her. “Aaand, it can’t be because they’re new members, because none of these people got a membership this week, or even have the same birth date.” She pointed at the screen. “I don’t think I even saw them come in, and that’s literally my job.” She huffed and tapped a long nail against the plastwood desk.
“Okay, so what does any of that mean?” I asked her nervously. She stopped tapping, and looked at me. Her face softened and she let out a sigh. “I don’t know. Honestly, it could be nothing. I just like knowing, you know?” Something told me that wasn’t entirely right, but I went along with it anyway.
“I do,” I said. “Mm, I thought so. No one likes being left in the dark.” The way she said it made me think she meant it in more ways than one. Her low, soft tone, and the words it formed reminded me of another darkness. The void I’d seen during and after the events at the convention.
The void… Something happened in there, didn’t it? I spoke to some…thing?
I was pulled away from my thoughts when Tyler suddenly slapped my shoulder. “Shit, speaking of! I worried about you after leaving you in the staff room, but apparently there was no need for that! I don’t think I’ve ever seen you put in that much effort before.” She brushed her acid green hair to the side and gave me another of her sly smiles.
“Uh, thanks, I guess?” I wasn’t entirely sure if it was a compliment. Then I realized what she’d just indirectly told me. She noticed me during my workouts.
“You’re welcome.” Her cheerful tone reminded me of Emily. Which reminded me of what she’d said about taking good care of myself, and that I was absolutely starving. I needed to eat something, and fast.
“I better get going,” I muttered and rose from the little office chair. “I, uh… I’m really hungry.” Tyler stayed sitting, but patted me on the back as I stood. “Thanks for today,” I said. “I think I really needed it.”
“Anytime,” she said. “Text me before your next session. I bet I’m a much better workout buddy than whoever you met today.” She winked and tapped my wrist. A second later a light shone that indicated I’d received a direct message from someone. It was a loop of an animated black cat in a skin tight suit, dancing to a nonexistent beat. The name of the sender was Valerie Tyler Kyoh.
“Valerie?” I asked.
“Forget you saw that,” said Tyler. I thought for a second she was joking, but then I looked back at her. The hard look in her eyes could have crushed rocks into dust. She was not joking. I gulped, then laughed nervously and edited her name on the message screen. The second I finished, her expression turned back to normal. Her attractive, sharp features returned, and her eyes showed no signs of wanting to commit murder.
“Good,” she said, almost entirely without the threat that had belied her words a second ago. “See you soon then?”
“Yeah, Tyler. See you soon.”