“After our fight with those wizards, it seems like the beasts chasing after us became less, and most of them only watches from a distance.” Elas said relieved.
“Yes, it has been two days, but no one dared to attack us. I guess that grand magic of Fryr made them heedful of Fryr’s magic, and Hagu’s… uh.. thew.” Eros said a bit unsure.
Fryr looked at Eros and began explaining. “They’re not wary of us. All of the vacuous ones could not go in the higher area of the mountain, and all that’s left on our tail are the canny ones. These slightly shrewd beasts are only waiting for the right time to attack, so be on your guard, for some of them are probably stronger than everything you’ve fought so far.” He then glanced ahead and continued. “But, don’t worry, we’re almost there, most of them would not dare step on the peak of the hill of despair.”
“What’s at the peak?” Elas asked.
“I’m not sure either, but some say that a spirit dwells there, and everyone who had a glimpse of the spirit was filled with never ending despair, which they say ‘death is even better in every way.’” Fryr said in a serious manner.
“It seems like what they saw was the spirit of the hill.” Elas said.
Fryr then sighed and said. “Even I am not sure, but I hope we don’t meet such creature.” When Fryr finished his last word, his face flinched and he looked back. There he saw several beasts releasing deadly magic and some even rushing towards their group.
“Run for it!” Fryr shouted. Then he lifted his arm “Katara Thureos” he said, creating a red shield in a form of a skull that attempted to block the enemies magical attack. Hagu dashed along with Eros and Elas, while Fryr stood on Hagu’s shoulder maintaining the shield. “Why are they suddenly attacking?” Elas asked a bit vexed, because near him a scaly creature appeared, and almost caught him in a blitz. Luckily his irk for such creature triggered him to impulsively attack which toppled the creatures strike.
“Maybe we’re close enough to the hill’s peak and they have no other choice but to charge or they’ll lose us.” Fryr said a bit groggy, as the shield absorbed numerous magic. “Too bad, they’re not my match.” He then said with a harrumph.
Attacks did not stop as more blocked their path. These beasts weren’t cooperating but instead they were racing on who gets the first kill. However, everything that blocks Hagu’s path get shredded or crushed by every swing of his massive hand. Even Elas was terrified that he might get caught by Hagu’s punch that sends blood and gore splattering to the ground.
Elas kept dodging and attacking, shooting arrows to incinerate or freeze enemies without warning. His movement was extremely agile as his dexterity of the bow proved to be not just for show. His attacks weren’t as destructive but were enough to get the advantage.
Eros also unleashed several attacks, but he could not focus since a voice randomly calls him from a distance. “Come..” The voice continuously said whenever they ascend. Ignoring the words, he could only hold onto Hagu while slaughtering the weaker foes.
“Fryr!” Elas shouted. “Do you know how far we are to the top of the hill? We’ve been running for some time, and these guys just won’t calm down.”
“I’m not sure, but I know were close enough. Just bear with it for a while.”
“No we’re almost there.” Eros said while looking ahead.
Elas glanced at Eros and asked while unleashing another attack. “How did you know that?”
“I’’m not sure, but I somehow know.” Eros said slowly as if he’s entranced by some unknown entity.
In his thought he can hear the voice frequently calling him. “Come.. I shall tell you my tale.”
As every minute passed, the beasts became aggressive and wild. It was as if they were trying to kill Eros’ group in the shortest amount of time. This became apparent to Fryr who then ordered Hagu to ignore his rear and focus on running. Elas also gritted his teeth and dashed in a flash, it was as if the wind was carrying him towards the hill top. Eros who was riding the rushing orc, did his best to hold onto Hagu’s shoulder. Even Fryr was now obviously flying to increase his own speed while guarding the rear.
Up ahead was a land without greenery, instead it was plain and rocky. There were boulders scattered around, and some magical stone formation which appears to be someone’s creation. Some of them were arranged neatly, and some seem to be still working properly, but could only possibly be used briefly.
Nothing seems to be special above, but when Eros’ group neared the top, the monsters that were running wild, suddenly stopped to a halt.
“Is this the top?” Elas asked while breathing heavily, who obviously exhausted most of his energy.
“It seems like it kid.” Fryr said lowering his hand causing the shield to dissipate without trace.
Hagu then stretched his body and said. “That was a good exercise.” Which made everyone glance at him and sigh.
With no one chasing them, they walked slowly and cautious of any possible enemy. It was the top of the hill, so there’s a possibly stronger opponent there. While walking, Fryr occasionally scanned the space using magic to ensure that there’s no one in the area. After walking for some time, he sighed in relief and pulled back his magic, then said. “Seems like there’s really no one here; we could look for clues on the location of Door of Sin without much worry.”
“The top of the hill doesn’t seem to be that wide, so you should’ve found the door by now. Did you scan the place properly?” Elas asked curiously.
“Yes, I am sure that I scanned the whole place already, but sadly, the Door of Sin could not be detected that easily. It is something that disregards the laws of space, so relying to magic to find it is a waste. We should look for it manually and just walk around in hope that we stumble on it normally.”
“Alright, we should start walking now then.” Elas said as rushed as always.
When they were about to start walking, all of them suddenly shivered, their mind reeled and their eyes widened. “Fryr… I thought you already scanned the area?” Elas said trembling.
“Yes.. I did.” Were the only words Fryr could say, for he himself was filled with fear.
In front of them was a boy sitting on a boulder. He seemed to be looking at a distant place no one could come over. Only his back faced the group who was scared to even move. He was ordinary in every way; however, something about him could make anyone tremble in fear. He did not move and only stayed on his spot, even when the group stared at him in fright. Even Hagu somehow paused because of the terror the boy have caused.
“So you have come.” The voice resounded in Eros’ mind. He glanced around and found out that everyone around him fell on their knees on the ground. Their pupils were trembling and their lips were twitching, it was as if they were in a trance, however, Eros could tell that despair filled their mind with a simple glance.
When he looked back in front, the boy was gone in an instant. Then suddenly, everything around him started to turn white. He could not tell if it was only an illusion or if he was being transferred to a different location. He tried to shout, but his voice won’t come out. A form suddenly appeared in his sight; it was his mother still beautiful and filled with delight. However, in an instant her skin wrinkled, her body weakened, and her life force withered. She said. “We love you Eros.” Her voice was exactly the same as his mom, so he immediately felt down. His mind is telling him that the whole thing is an illusion, but he could not control his emotion.
“Mother…” was the word he said, but unfortunately no voice came out no matter how much he shouted. He tried to move towards his mother, but he could not get close to her. No matter how fast he run, the distance remained unchanged. He could only watch his mother slowly wither and ceased to exist. In the same instant that his mother turned to nothing but ash, an image formed with his father’s appearance. He wore the same clothes before his death, and same smile that made Eros feel deep regret. Slowly, the body of his father, twisted and compressed, then suddenly after his last words, he exploded into bits, sending blood into Eros’ face. The feeling of rage he felt could not be described by simple words; despair filled his thoughts as another image of people appeared which made him deluge in remorse. Cory who was wearing an ordinary garment, but was filled with her kind deportment, glanced at Eros with her usual uneasy countenance, which reflected her adore. Suddenly, her head fell on her feet sliced by a hand of a wizard glowing in heat. Along with her, many other people familiar to Eros appeared who suffered the same fate. It was apparent that these events happened after Eros fled. He wasn’t sure if these events actually ensued after he disappeared, but it still crushed his heart to the greatest extent, especially the death of Cory who always cared for him since he was a baby.
“Cory.. Everyone..” Eros said while tears flowed down his cheeks. “I am sorry.”
The scenes played several times, which Eros did not even find unusual. He was so deeply submerged in despair, and felt that the world is unfair. Currently, he could not even tell the difference between reality and illusion, and it seems that nothing could wake him up from his situation.
Up above, a boy appeared, he simply hovered in the empty space watching Eros suffer in distress whose face twisting with rage. The boy seemed ordinary if viewed from afar, however, shockingly, even though he felt like he was watching Eros intently, nothing could be seen in his face. It was blank, no eyes, nose and lips, simply smooth skin covering his face. Still, one could still notice, the despair seeping out of his flesh.
He observed for several hours seemingly waiting for something to occur. “Was I wrong?” A voice came out from his blank face.
Suddenly, after he said those words, a weird glow appeared on Eros’ eyes, which caught the boy’s interest. “So he’s starting to understand those emotions.” The boy said while slowly hovering towards Eros’ location.
After a full day of observation, a mark appeared on Eros’ eyes. It was the mark of Orcus which he hated from the bottom of his heart. When it appeared, the illusions shattered and Eros caught sight of the faceless boy standing extremely close to his face.
Eros stumbled backward, shocked of the boy who was staring at his eyes. “Who.. Who are you?” Eros asked stuttering.
The boy did not speak for a while, and only directed his attention towards Eros, who was slowly edging backwards. “Curse.. Such complex curse.” The boy murmured.
“Your understanding for emotion is deep that this space could not compete. Let me tell you my tale, for you are the only one I have been able to communicate after such a long time.”
Eros did not know what to do and what the boy mean. He only wanted to escape the situation he’s in. With the terrifying aura the boy was emitting, he could not move in resistance to anything that the boy could do to him.
The boy ignored his struggle, and simply lifted his arm towards Eros, causing ripples to cover the space around them and made everything simply disappear. When Eros opened his eyes, the sun shone in his face, for some reason, he knew that he wasn’t himself and was in a body of a small earth creature, but the personality of this creature suppressed his own, making him act how the creature would do so, while aware of everything he’s doing.
“So I am stuck in this body of a small earth creature, with all his memories combined with mine. Now that I think about it, I am starting get unsure which is the real me. Is this memory of a boy in me a fake memory?” Eros in his new form thought.
While thinking deeply, a girl came leisurely walking towards a tree. She knelt down and planted a seed below the tree and said. “Since you can’t bear a fruit and I can’t bring you with me, I will gift you with a partner that would accompany you forever.” Then the girl smiled cheerfully walking away from the tree.
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Eros approached her involuntarily, and looked at her deeply. “Oh hello little gaios. What’s your name?” The girl said merrily.
Eros thought deeply, but in his memory as a gaios, he had no name, so he quickly shook his head and tried to say. “I have no name.” But what came to his mouth were only the words. “No Name.”
He quickly realized that his ability to speak was reduced to the level of an infant which made him feel more confused of the situation he was in.
“Oh! I’ll name you Oms.” It’s a simple name you’ll be easily able to pronounce. The girl then lifted him up with her small hands, and smiled while asking. “Do you like that name?”
Eros wasn’t sure what’s happening, but he simply stared at her obediently nodding. He also noticed that he had no ability to feel emotions, but something about the girl doesn’t even make him a bit cautious.
“I’m Emma, do you want to be friends?” The girl asked with a wide smile which reflected even in her eyes.
Eros again nodded, and could not help but stare at the girl’s happy face. After the introduction, they played for the whole afternoon, while Emma taught her a lot of things and even human speech.
Emma noticed that even though they were playing, he seemed to be not smiling, so she asked. “Are you not happy with what we’re doing?”
Eros glanced at her and answered with a bit of effort. “A Gaios… no emotions.”
Emma squinted her charming green eyes, and said. “Maybe you should try mimicking mine.” Then she gave another bright smile.
Eros tried but for some reason, he could not feel a thing even though he’s smiling. Emma then softly pinched Eros and said. “There! Make sure you do that every day, so that you’ll start to learn how to feel.”
They continued their routine for several days, only playing and trying to have fun ignoring how much time has passed by. Gradually, Eros’ thought that his memory as a human boy was probably only a dream, and wasn’t even real. He also started forgetting them like it was nothing.
Soon, after a whole year being friends with the girl, he completely forgot about the memories as Eros in him. He was completely sure that he was a gaios, and a friend of this charming girl who named him Oms. He learned a lot of things from the girl which he tried to remember as much as he can. Even his speech got better, which made their communication easier.
They began learning magic, and Emma showed a lot of talent. Eros was an earth spirit so his affinity with magic was easier than expected. He can draw the energy in nature in a simple gesture. However, he was just a small ordinary gaios so his growth stopped as soon as he reached his limit. Contrary, Emma, showed drastic progress which left a huge gap in their levels. But, Emma remained the same; kind and nice to Eros who was someone not even worth mentioning.
Their friendship grew stronger even with their gap in society becoming wider. Emma became a wizard, who was strong enough to gain admiration from the people of the nation. Eros could only watch her still carrying, the same smile when she was a kid still playing. For years he tried to copy her emotions, but still nothing he did made him able to mimic her beautiful smile, that made Eros yearn to have emotions.
He had no emotions and it was impossible for him to feel it, but for some reason, he thought that maybe he would be able to understand it. So with all all his effort, he tried to create a magic to help him understand emotion and eventually experience it. Day and night, he invested a considerable amount of time in a magic that he never thought that would change his life.
“Oms!” Emma said excitedly. “I haven’t seen you for quite a while, what have you been doing all this time?”
He did not respond, but instead looked at her in the eye. There he saw emotions, he long wished to understand. This time he felt it for the first time; his magic was working and he was able to understand Emma’s emotion deep inside. He could not yet feel it for himself, yet simply understanding it gave him hope to do his best. “I could do this!” He thought, then after a while of chatting, he left Emma to focus on his research. He did not tell her about the magic he was creating, since he wanted to show her his face filled with emotion; real and smiling.
After several years, he fully understood emotions, but he did not stop there, what he wished was not simply to understand it, but to instead to have it. So he evolved his magic into something different, something that would make him experience it, and eventually become inherent.
Eventually, he was able to create a magic able to absorb emotions and for him to be able to make it his own. Quickly, upon activation of his new magic, emotions filled him and for the first time, he actually experienced joy. Happiness filled him, as he laughed uproariously. It was a laugh filled with delight. He never thought that having his own emotion would give him ability to make such expression.
While thinking about his past with Emma, his heart jumped with exhilaration. He could now feel joy by simply thinking about memories he cherished. This time, he was filled with exultation of being able to successfully feel emotion.
“I need to show this to Emma!” That was the first thing that came to his mind. However, when he came looking for her, only then did he found out that she went to war, and that the enemy has the advantage and they weren’t on par.
He tried to wait for Emma to return. For months, he absorbed innumerable amount of emotion which made him bigger and stronger. It wasn’t long before his size became as large as a boy. But, as he consumed more emotion from other people, he started to get confused from it. Various emotions always rushed in him, causing him to feel even sorrow and pain. He did not want to feel it, but he could not stop it. When he made his magic, he made sure that it would become permanent, and he was certain that there will be no such time that he would not want it.
So, quickly, he became crazed as his sized continuously increased. On the other hand, Emma did not return yet, a year have passed, but only news of her defending the border came back to him. Because of his emotions, he felt anxious of many possible situations, thinking that Emma might have been caught in something perilous. His obsession to see Emma grew stronger, which made him decide that he should just go look for her. With determination, he marched towards the war zone, where he felt extreme despair of everyone there. Dying was everywhere; magical attacks flew every time in the air. No place was safe for him to hide, but he pushed on to be by Emma’s side.
As he pushed on further, he grew larger. His magic which consumes emotions became stronger, and it activated on its own which he was unable to control. Days, weeks, months, and years passed, he became 5 meter tall land mass. He was filled with different type of emotions, but most of it was sadness and despair. He also started slaying mages on his way, causing him to learn the feeling of winning and killing. He got indulged in winning all his fights, and he was filled with fervor which intensified his might.
Soon, he lost his purpose. He became a simple monster bringing disaster. He was consumed by his own magic, which he never thought would cause something tragic. One day, he reached a location where many mages and wizards have set up a formation. In it was a fort which was erected to withstood attacks of any sort. No one would dare to enter such strong defense which was even coupled with a magical barrier. However, not far, there were thousands of wizards and mages of different race advancing towards the shield, inside, the wizards also activated a magic symbols which filled the whole field.
With a loud bang, the magic of thousand wizards collided with the barrier; cracks appeared on it which made it significantly weaker. Everyone was tense; a huge war would break out anytime the barrier collapse into million pieces.
In a few breaths, the barrier shattered and the fight started. Cry of rage and determination rang at the same time. Many died at an instant, but many also survived to slay more in the fight.
Eros who was caught up in the battle, started his slaughter. Many died in his hands, but he also sustained injuries after several bouts. Soon, he lost count of how much he slaughtered, and was fully intoxicated. For some reason, no matter how much he got injured, it healed in a matter of seconds. It was as if emotions in the whole battlefield were being absorbed in his body in extremely large quantities.
At one point in the war, he faced a valiant grand wizard whose strength was unmatched. In a short time, he was suppressed, but for some reason, he was spared. The grand wizard however was caught in a bind as many wizards attacked at once. Eros who was simply watching, quickly recovered from his wounds and also attacked the grand wizard who tried not to lose.
Eros who was growing stronger as the fight drags longer, dealt a blow which severely injured the grand wizard. She then fell onto the ground unable to get up while looking at Eros with a complex smile. However, Eros did not care; he only wanted to slay her. So with a strong attack, he pierced the body of the grand wizard. But before he could laugh, he looked at her in the eye and suddenly remembered something he should have never forgotten.
“You grew up quite fast.” The grand wizard said with a smile, as she slowly lifted her arms towards Eros who was now horrified of what he has done. “Oms,I’m sorry I can’t accompany you forever, I should’ve given you a partner instead of bringing you along and lived together. Just like the tree that I was friend with where we first met.” As she spoke her voice became weaker and soft. She was exhibiting emotions that shook Eros to the core. After a long time since he created his magic, it was the first time that he felt it became complete.
Suddenly, his eyes cleared and his first tears flowed. “Emma… I.. I’m sorry..” There were several words he wanted to say but he was clouded with despair. When he said those words, Emma closed her eyes, and her face had no hate towards Eros who just killed her. Eros then also stopped moving, he just remained there looking at his friend who was slowly dying. There was nothing he could do, and healing her was something impossible with her injury.
The fighting continued, but Eros was ignored by everyone, since he only sat there on a daze in front of his love one. The familial love he now felt, was something he always dreamed to get. However, he never imagined, that the time he would feel it will be at her friend’s death.
Time passed, the fighting ended, and the place was littered with corpses. Eros who was with his friend’s corpse, still remained in his location filled with remorse. Easily, a year passed, and many other battles occurred in the same area, but Eros still remained at the same spot without moving an inch. His mind lost, while his body kept absorbing emotions that’s still in his location. He grew in size as years went on, until such time that he merged with the soil that he previously stood on.
One day, he suddenly awakened. He was filled with despair that he accumulated. He observed his surroundings and noticed that he have grown bigger, but something seems to be missing. He suddenly remembered how he killed his friend, but, his mind trembled as realized that he forgot some of the memory about her before they fought.
He panicked, but it did nothing to stop the memories from fading. He realized that he was already a hill and could not move on his own will. The only thing he could do was absorb more emotions that he deeply wished to stop in his own volition. He tried and tried to stop his own magic, but nothing he did could stop it. Innumerable years passed and all his happy memories of her faded, he doesn’t know if it was because of the passage of time, or because of the negative emotions he have built up throughout the time. However, he was sure of one thing, he never wanted to forget the remaining memory of his friend which he hold dear. Since the only remaining memory he could remember was the time he killed her, he continued to absorb despair to help him preserve the remaining memory of her. This time, he was able to stop absorbing other emotions and focus on absorbing despair which for years, kept the memory he cherished.
Soon, he became a large hill, which was part of the legends and was named Hill of Despair by many people who pass along him on a regular basis.
He lived his life absorbing despair to make sure he could retain the remaining memory of Emma, even though it was a memory of her death, It was the only memory he have left. Even after several years, he remained to do the same; not willing to give up the memory of her.
One day, he murmured. “Emotions.. What is it really?... Is it something that we simply use.. Or is something that controls us. Sometimes it causes situations that are beyond our control. It can cause war by simple burst of anger of one man.”
Then again, he thought deeply, but this time, the whole massive body was shaking intensely. “Was my understanding of it wrong? And it ended up controlling me that lead in this situation? I guess my understanding is lacking, but I realized something. That it can be controlled and that I have the ability to do so.”
When he said those words, his mind spun and something in him made him remember. “I am Eros..” He thought.
This one line made the memories he have forgotten to resurface again. It was triggered by the first layer of curse of Orcus inside him. He was flooded with memory, which then sent unbearable pain in his whole body. Then with it, his eyes snapped open! In front of him he saw the same faceless boy, but oddly, blurred closed eyes seemed to be forming in his face, which then slowly opened and glowed with bright rays. These rays struck Eros and filled him with unexplainable emotion that he has never ever felt before.
"So you have gained something.” A voice echoed in his head. “I was right that you could understand it; mortal emotion which I have long studied.”
Then when the rays died down, he saw the boy, but now carrying a charming face and a bright smile. It was the same smile that Emma taught her the first day they met and something that he wished to show Emma before she met her tragic fate.
“I had a glimpse of it.” Said the boy. “Thank you. I have forgotten those memories for so long, If not for you, it would have remained locked deep in me. Even though I know it is impossible to keep these flash of memories which you have given access to me, I still thank you for giving me opportunity to glance at my life before I created this magic that destroyed me.”
Eros then looked at the boy softly and said. “Even though Emma could not see that smile, I believe she would be happy, that you were able to do it even though it took you a long time.”
Then the boy slowly vanished along with the white space, revealing his previous location at the top of the Hill of Despair. There he saw Fryr, Elas and Hagu, who seemed to be stuck in an illusion that makes them filled with despair.
He then tapped each of their foreheads, waking them up from their dreams. Each one of them was startled and asked. “What happened? My head hurts and I can’t seem to remember something.”
Eros simply smiled and ignored the three, he knew that they experienced the same illusion as him, however, they failed to gain understanding. If not for him, they would have been stuck in the illusion forever, never to wake up again.
“If one understands his magic, he could free himself from it, which would also allow that earth spirit to regain the experience you got from it. I am glad he was able to remember something precious to him. I hope he could someday start absorbing positive emotion and retain the memory he got from me.”
“My head hurts. It’s like I forgot something that happened for a very long time.” Fryr said while thinking deeply.
“Me too, It hurts. “ Hagu said.
“Oh, I wonder what hurts inside there.” Fryr said in mockery, and then glanced at Eros who was staring at the direction of a stone formation, where a door seemed to be floating surrounded by massive amount of natural energy.
“The Door of Sin!” Fryr said filled with exhilaration. “We found it!”