“Daddy! Daddy!”

Maybe if I just ignore her she’ll go away, I thought. The sound of feet stomping up to me proved the thought was hopeless.

“Daddy! I know you can hear me!”

I opened one eye to see a very frustrated ten year old girl staring at me, then closed it again.

“Don’t make me do it, Daddy!” she warned.

I continued sitting where I was, a smile tugging at the corner of my lips as I pretended to ignore her.

“Don’t say I didn’t warn you.” This statement was quickly followed by a distinctive POP I had heard many times before, and I suddenly felt two pairs of hands on me, a pair on each shoulder, shaking me back and forth with alternating cries of “Daddy!” “Dad!” “Daddy!” “Dad!”

With a roar, I swung my arms out and hooked two pairs of legs around their thighs and jumped to my feet, lifting Angela and Aisha up and spinning in a circle. Their shrieks of alarm quickly changed to laughter as I helicoptered them under the same tree I once had a breakdown under. I liked to come here every now and then to decompress, the serene lake one of my favorite places to visit on Genesis. Coming to a stop, I gave the twins a chance to get their bearings again.

“So, what do you little troublemakers want today?” I asked them.

“Mother sent us to get you,” Angela said.

“Aunt Effie is back. She says she has news,” said Aisha.

“Really? Well, why didn’t you say so?” I teased as I put them down. They instantly popped back into Anai. I still hadn’t figured out the reasons she had for deciding to be Anai or separating into the twins. She was unique in the household for having three rooms. One for Anai, and one each for Angela and Aisha, and all three rooms had distinctive personalities. I reflected back on Ephine’s words ten years ago and wondered just what would happen if she ever started dating. I shook the thought out of my head. She’s only ten, let’s leave future headaches for Future John.

Present Anai stomped her foot. “I tried to, but you ignored me!”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I said as I took her hand and we started walking home. Coming over the rise I was greeted with the sight of the manor I had built. My grand castle idea was almost immediately vetoed by everyone, most notably Su and Hannah, who came at the idea from a maid’s perspective, and none of them had any desire to maintain a building that large. It still had a grandeur that put most residences Earthside to shame though. I grew up a man of simple means and remembered being happy in my one bedroom apartment before the Event, but for once I wanted something just a little ostentatious. The result was a mansion that blended inspiration from English manors, Southern plantations, and just a hint of all those stuffy old colleges that liked to look down on community college graduates like me.

The house was built on the plot that the old residence used to occupy and then some. We debated that particular issue a while when I informed everyone of my plans. Understandably, the only holdouts were the ones who’d been there the longest, but they all suddenly changed their minds one day while I was Earthside at the founding of a new church in the world’s first underwater city in the East China Sea, Sanbao City. I’m not entirely sure what was said while I was gone, and I’ve never asked, but Su had me build a separate building behind the manor that’s essentially an apartment complex for the girls that work for us, each having a spacious apartment for their own use, and most of them have the option of popping down to Earth periodically for a change in routine. During a couple comics conventions they were even allowed to walk around openly where they were an overwhelming hit with the cosplay community.

Approaching the front doors, I saw Ephine kneeling down and hugging our seven year old son, Uther. She’d been away for a while, off doing whatever it was a galactic goddess does. It’s not that she hasn’t told me everything involved with her responsibilities, it’s just that they were so much more massive than mine. I had one planet to think about right now. She had all of them, and that kept her away for months or, sometimes, years at a time. She’d been gone for a year this time. Watching over the reuniting mother and child were a pleased looking Persia and Rhia, while Ryo was bounding around everyone.

“Daddy!” Uther yelled upon seeing me and darted away from Ephine to launch himself in my direction. “Look! Mommy’s home!”

I plucked the yellow haired ball of energy out of the air with my free hand and swung him around on to my back where he grabbed on like a monkey. “I see that, buddy! What do you think, should we go play video games?”

“If you don’t kiss me hello, you won’t be capable of playing any video games,” Ephine said with a wicked grin as she sauntered over to us.

“You should kiss her, Daddy. Girls like being kissed hello,” said Anai with authority.

“We’re going to talk about how you came about this knowledge later. For now, however…” my words trailed off as Ephine leaned down and greeted me with a long, lingering kiss. The kids disengaged themselves from me and ran off to play with Ryo, not that I noticed right away, occupied as I was. After who knew how long, a cleared throat caught our attention and we disengaged from each other. “To be continued?” I asked.

“Oh you know it. You still owe me a daughter,” she smiled at me. “My next stop after this is with Su to clear your calendar for tonight.”

“I think tonight was her night,” offered Persia. “You’ll probably have better luck asking to join instead of getting her to give it up.”

Ephine smiled and nodded, then turned serious. “John, you’re going to have company.”

“Company?”

She nodded. “Yes. There are ships heading your way from some of the worlds that have started worshipping your name. They’ll be here in a couple months. I don’t sense any hostility from them, and as we agreed I’m not going to interfere, since this is a local matter that doesn’t jeopardize the galaxy at large but keep your guard up. This could just be a group of pilgrims, it could be representatives of other gods, or it could be the gods themselves.”

I looked at her suspiciously, and she affected an innocent look while glancing over at Uther as he chased Ryo. “You know what’s coming, don’t you?”

“I’m sure I don’t know what you mean,” she said.

“You know, but you want to see how it plays out.”

She huffed. “Of course, I know! How could I not? But where would be the fun in telling you? Listen, you have a far better grasp on your capabilities now than you did ten years ago. You have one of the fastest growing followings on Earth. You’ve got five active Oracles and you’re married to three goddesses, one of whom runs the galaxy. No matter what these ships have, you’ll be fine.”

I nodded. “I’m sure I will be, if only because you all have helped me become the man I am.”

“You’re a god, sweetheart. So much more than a mere man,” Rhia said. “Anyway, your daughter is being fussy and wants her daddy.”

“Which one?”

“The baby.”

I raised an eyebrow.

Rhia sighed. “Right, there are more than one now, aren’t there?”

“So, Miranda?”

“That’s the one,” said Rhia, chuckling.

“You should really stop calling her a baby. She’s four now,” I said as we made our way inside. “She in her room?”

“Kitchen,” Persia said.

“I should have known. We’ll talk more about our guests later. Let me go see what our own little Tsumugi wants,” I laughed and headed towards the kitchen. Miranda had inherited Lily’s taste for odd food, if not her pink hair, and spent a lot of time in the kitchen testing every creation they came up with, very reminiscent of the little girl in Sweetness and Lightning. The little brunette girl was seated on her customary stool watching Lyfsertale coordinate the preparation of lunch for everyone. These days she had staff to work with, since the number of people she had to feed was far larger than it used to be.

“Daddy!” Miranda said happily when she saw me. She turned in her seat and raised her arms up to be lifted, which I obliged. “Miss Liff was teaching me how to make cheeseburgers!”

“Oh really? Did you help at all?”

“Yes she did, My Lord,” the chef said as she worked the grill. “You can see the patty she made right here.”

I walked and stood next to her and Miranda pointed at her masterpiece, which looked as good as you imagine a four year old’s hamburger patty to look. She was proud of it though, and I of course praised her efforts, then set her on the counter so I could speak with her face to face.

“Aunt Rhia says you’re being fussy.”

Miranda sat there playing with her hands. “I was bored. No one wanted to play.”

“Oh, so you came here?” She nodded, thinking she was in trouble. I ruffled her hair and smiled. “Alright. As long as you’re staying out of trouble. If Miss Liff asks you to do something, be sure and listen to her, ok? She’s not in the way, is she?” I asked the chef.

She shook her head. “Not at all. If she wants to learn how to cook, I’m more than happy to teach her.”

“I can’t imagine her having a better teacher.”

“You’re too kind, My Lord. Now shoo. We still have more patties to make,” she waved her hands at me to clear me out of the kitchen. I raised my hands in surrender, knowing if the chef says leave, you leave. I made my way upstairs to Hannah’s room to check on her and our newest family member. Ever since the twins were born, the gloves had pretty much come off the ladies’ baby fever, with the count currently sitting at four kids, plus the twins who fluctuate the count. John Jr was currently Earthside with Linda, so the daily rumbles between him and Uther were on hold for now, which was a blessing, as it gave little one month old Laina and Hannah a break from their rough housing. The boys loved each other as brothers usually do and showed that love by getting into as much mischief as possible. That usually led to the two seven year olds bringing the ambient noise level in the large house up a surprising percentage and disturbing the younger children.

I poked my head into Hannah’s room and smiled as I saw her and Su fussing over Laina as they tag teamed changing her diaper. Both were old pros at it by now, having helped with the older children. Su looked up and saw me enter, smiling warmly as she lifted Laina up and cradled her. Hannah turned and smiled.

“Hey, hubby. Checking on your favorite wives?”

“Don’t let Ephine hear you say that. She’s convinced she’s my favorite,” I laughed as walked up to them. I gave Su a quick kiss, then took my daughter from her arms. Her blonde hair was already growing quickly, and she had her mother’s tanned skin, but my hazel eyes. “You make pretty babies, Akomin.”

Hannah pouted. “I knew telling you my homeworld name was a bad idea.” Then she smiled. “And of course I do!” She leaned in to look at our daughter, happiness radiating from her. “We should make more!”

“Slow down, cowgirl. Aura’s due in another couple months, and Rhia not long after that. Not to mention you just had one. There’s no reason to rush. We’re going to be together for a very long time,” I reminded her as I planted a kiss on her cheek. “Will you two be joining us for lunch? Miranda is helping make it today.”

“Oh? She’s grown quite fond of the kitchen lately, hasn’t she?” remarked Su.

“Yeah. If she sticks with it, maybe I’ll look into a chef school for her to go to. Then again, she’s only four, so I’m sure her tastes will change when she gets older. Speaking of school, how are the kids doing?”

Su grinned. “Quite well. Anai is your typical ten year old in class, while Angela and Aisha couldn’t be more different from each other. Angela concentrates harder than any of the others, while Aisha spends most of her time staring out the window or trying to play with the class’ pet moon rabbit. Junior and Uther are doing much better now that I have them sitting on opposite sides of the room, and Miranda has gotten quite good at coloring.”

I nodded at the progress report. Su had taken the job of teacher, since the kids were still too young to actually attend school Earthside without raising too many questions. Then there was the fact that the twins and Uther actually had divine power to deal with. For the most part, Ephine and I had had ensured their power was sealed, only allowing enough juice for them to get used to handling it, but we didn’t want them so dependent on it that they couldn’t function without it. Eventually, however, we’d have to sit down and discuss with them about going Earthside for high school. The twins had an especially difficult choice about whether they’d rather go as twins or Anai. I knew it wouldn’t be too difficult to find someone to teach them here, but I wanted them to have an understanding of life among humans and also a life without powers, so they’d fully appreciate what they’ve got. Ephine agreed with me on this, since she’s watched so many other divine beings get lost in their own sense of self-importance.

“That’s great. I don’t know what we can do about Aisha beyond letting Persia handle it. You know I suck at disciplining the kids. Maybe if we tailor lessons for her towards something to do with nature? She does spend most of her time running through the woods around the house.”

Su cocked her head a little. “That’s not a bad idea. Individualized lessons will be harder to put together, but it’s only the five of them, so it shouldn’t be too hard. Could I pull some of the staff to help?”

This story originates from Royal Road. Ensure the author gets the support they deserve by reading it there.

I laughed. “They’re your staff, babe. Do what you want with them. Talk to Drake’s people too. Oh!” A thought struck me out of the blue. I’m actually surprised it took me this long. “Why not set up a school with the Junaian children as well? Get a couple of the adults to help. I’m sure Bellata would be thrilled to not have to worry about Zeke and Paris for a few hours a day, and the other dozen or so children in the village that are old enough for schooling.”

“That could work,” Su said thoughtfully. “Oh, they don’t go by Junaians anymore.”

That caught me off-guard. “What? Since when? What do they call themselves now?”

Su smiled. “I’m not sure when they officially changed over, but now they call themselves Genesians. They said it was a symbol of their new start, and they all officially worship Persia, but you already knew that part.”

I laughed, remembering how embarrassed Persia looked when they unveiled their shrine dedicated to her. Ephine even blessed it for them. Persia wouldn’t gain any power from their direct worship, according to Ephine, but every act of compassion would be met with benefits. It all sounded so karmic, but everyone came out a winner, so who was I remark on how odd it sounded to me?

“Alright, the Genesians then. Go ahead and set something up. If you want to set up a campus or something just let me know and I’ll take care of it.”

The intercom barked to life, and Hannah bolted for the volume control before whatever announcement could wake the sleeping beauty in my arms. She made it just in time as Miranda’s voice powered through the speaker, not realizing she didn’t need to yell.

“…Like this? Ok. I got it! Ahem, LUNCH IS READY! IT’S CHEESEBURGERS THAT I HELPED MAKE! How do I turn it off? Like this? I ju-” and her voice cut out. The three of us shook our heads and chuckled.

“Well, ladies? Lunch is apparently ready. It’s cheeseburgers,” I said.

“We’ll be right along. Just let me put her down for her nap,” said Hannah, taking Laina from my arms. As they were laying her down I made my way downstairs, running into a yawning Lily along the way, her pink hair a mess as she plodded down the stairs. “Taking a nap?”

“Not anymore,” she said wryly. “I thought I’d get some peace and quiet when she ran to the kitchen, but that didn’t last long.”

“Welcome to motherhood,” I said.

“It’s your fault, you know,” she said as she slipped her arm in mine.

“I seem to remember you being quite willing at the time.”

She smacked my arm with her free hand. “I meant today, you big lug. No one wanted to play today, and her daddy disappeared on us.”

“Sorry about that. I needed some time to myself to think.”

“Texas?” she asked.

“Yeah. Thanks to Ephine’s training, I have a better handle on my powers than I did when I created this world. I can easily heal the scar and bring life back to the region, but I’m not sure how it would go over. I have to talk it over with the president first. It’ll be easier now then a few years ago, thanks to them absorbing the six northern Mexican states into the U.S., but that doesn’t mean the people will allow me to do anything there. The whole area is treated as a memorial, and I can certainly understand why, but it’s been almost twenty years. That’s a lot of land that could be put to good use. As long as they don’t rebuild Houston. Fuck that place.”

Lily shook her head at my last comment but patted my arm reassuringly. “You’ll figure it out. You always do. People are listening to you more. You’ve proven that you’re only looking out for their best interests. There may be some pushback, but I honestly think most people would be in favor of it.”

I looked into her silver eyes as we walked into the dining room and saw the admiration she had for me in them. I kissed her forehead and thanked her, then noticed that the room was empty.

“Didn’t she say lunch was ready?” I asked. Lily shrugged in response.

“Mommy! Daddy! Out here!” We turned to see Miranda poking her head into the dining room. “Outside!” she said happily. Smiling, we followed her. Of course we were having a picnic in the front lawn. Miranda loved picnics. Guess it helped having a parent that could control the weather so it was always pleasant. Miranda, and Junior for that matter, hadn’t shown any trace of my divinity in them. They were just normal, happy humans. They knew about my powers, but oddly seemed okay with not having any themselves. I knew if I were in their shoes I’d be jealous of my brother and sisters that did have powers. This may change in time, but for now, I took it as the blessing it was. Lily and I settled on the ground with everyone else and helped ourselves to a couple burgers and the arrayed fixings on a large blanket before Miranda plopped down in between us, already stuffing her face.

Looking around, I smiled at my family. Rhia and Aura were sitting together, talking about each other’s pregnancies. Rhia had a bump showing at five months, while at seven months Aura looked like she was smuggling a Volkswagen. There was no way there was only one baby in there, but I wasn’t allowed to know. Only a select few knew anything, and Aura told me that she wanted to surprise me. Persia was sitting next to them, silent but smiling as she nibbled on her burger. Anai was carefully putting together hers, clearly wanting it to look like the cheeseburgers she saw pictures of when she used the divine internet I’d set up, which was really just an offshoot of the screen I’d been using since day one up here. Ephine and Uther were sitting on my other side, Ephine leaning in to me as she ate and watched Uther devour his lunch. Su and Hannah joined us shortly and started eating, praising Miranda on her skills, causing the little girl to grin broadly, ketchup and bits of meat falling out of mouth in the process. Only Linda, Shu and John Jr were missing, but I know Junior was having the time of his life down in Sanbao City, so I didn’t feel too bad about their absence. I planned on visiting them soon anyway.

“So, what are you up to lately?” Ephine asked in between bites.

“Elephant’s foot today. Maybe a couple other things if I have the time. Then back here to properly welcome my wife home.” She smiled at the last, but then pointed at Uther.

“Take him with you? When’s the last time he was Earthside?”

I smiled. “Bring your kid to work day? Okay, I can do that. We went to see the Ghibli movie marathon last month. Kid loves Castle in the Sky. I have a feeling I know what his first project will be once we unseal his powers,” I laughed. Uther looked up at the mention of the movie. “I was telling your mother what we did last month. Want to come with me today? We’re going to fix up some land so people don’t get sick anymore.”

Since his mouth was too full to speak, he gave me a thumbs up. Ephine smiled and stroked his hair, her black complexion contrasting sharply with his yellow hair and the fair skin that he got from me.

“I’m glad he looks more like you. He can walk around your planet easily. I have to change so much just to avoid shocking people.”

“One day we’ll be able to reveal your presence, babe. We just need to solidify my faith base first before letting the world know there are even higher beings out there. Of course, being my wife should ease the blow a bit and not cost me too much in followers.”

She sighed. “That day may be sooner than you think. The ships heading here aren’t like Kamiki’s asteroid ship. These will clearly be artificial ships, and there’s no way the people down there will miss them. You’re going to have to ramp up your miracle work to bring more people under your influence. Some of the religions down there won’t take too kindly to finding out that they’re not the be all end all of creation, like those annoying camps scattered across the Middle East that you’ve left alone for some reason.”

I sighed. “We’ve talked about this. I can’t take care of every problem they have. Most people in the region are pretty cool and can’t stand them either. Even if I just snapped my fingers and banished them from existence, more would crop up. The best that I can do is occasionally embarrass whatever guy is in charge and undercut his authority. The real killer blow comes when their own followers start doubting what the boss is preaching, and everyone else finally rallies to drive them out. Remember what happened in North Korea when I made their internet truly world wide and the people got a look at things without the government filter? That little fat bastard running the country packed his bags and bolted so fast his shadow took a day to catch up to him. I just need to keep nibbling away at these assholes running their little terror cells until even their own followers start to question everything they say.”

Ephine nodded and Lily looked over at us. “Whatever happened to that dude anyway?”

“He tried seeking asylum in Moscow. Officially, he was attacked by a bear while hunting last year. Unofficially, he committed suicide by shooting himself twice in the back of the head and feeding himself to a bear.”

“Cool,” said Uther.

“Eat your lunch,” said Ephine, giving me a dirty look. Lily stared at me wide eyed.

“What? Moscow is still fighting against the message I’m sending for some reason, but that doesn’t mean they don’t have their uses every now and then.”

“No talking about work at lunch, Daddy! You promised!” Miranda scolded me. I apologized, raising my hands in surrender to my little girl. Satisfied, she went back to happily eating her food and basking in the sunlight. The women around the blanket giggled, amused at how she had me wrapped around her finger. We continued eating and making small talk until the food was gone. After that, Anai split into the twins, with Angela finding a tree to read under nearby and Aisha disappearing into the woods. Uther grabbed an old tennis ball I hadn’t noticed before and was doing his best to throw the ball as far as he could as Ryo bounded after it, the low gravity carrying her faster and further than she was ever capable of on Earth. Miranda made her way over to the miniature castle I built years ago. It was the only concession I was given when I proposed the Moon Castle idea. Now I had one, and it was a playhouse for the kids. Well, at least they were happy.

After the kids had departed, talk turned to our schedules for the afternoon. I was headed to the Ukraine with Uther, and everyone was going to laze around the house. There was nothing immediately pressing going on, and Aura wanted a day to relax before she called a meeting of the Oracles. After hearing of Ephine’s news, she wanted to verify no one had any visions or the like that appeared to be negative. I smirked and nudged Ephine as we noticed Uther trying not to obviously listen in on Aura’s plan. An Oracle meeting meant Isabella would be coming. Isabella coming meant Petra might come. He had developed a bit of a crush on her lately, although the fifteen year old treated him like a kid brother. It still didn’t stop him from ogling her when she visited, which was almost every time Isabella came up here. I did have to admire the boy’s taste. Petra was growing up to be a beautiful young woman, although I’d never see her as anything more than a beloved niece. Maybe daughter-in-law in the future? I thought, mentally shrugging at the idea. It’s not like an eight year age gap was a big deal. Especially to anyone here. Aside from Lily, I was the youngest one here in my fifties, with everyone else being in the triple digit age range and higher, a couple much higher.

Careful, Ephine thought at me, squinting her eyes at me as she picked up my thought train. Smiling, I kissed her cheek and immediately felt warmth blossom under my lips. I couldn’t see her blush thanks to her black skin, but that didn’t mean she wasn’t capable of it. I stood up, waving Uther over.

“We should probably get going, before Uther’s ear pops off and lands in Aura’s lap. If he strains any harder listening for Petra’s name, the poor guy will give himself a stroke.” The boy in question heard my last comment and turned beet red, but didn’t say anything. I laughed and dropped an arm over his shoulder. “Ready for a field trip, buddy?”

*

“Hey! It looks just like that video game we played!” Uther exclaimed as we explored the ruins of the city.

“Yeah, no assassination mission this time though. Now we’re here to fix it.” Thanks to our divinity, we were both protected from the background radiation rendering the city uninhabitable, but there were still hundreds in the region that had decided to attempt it anyway. It had been almost fifty years since Pripyat had been evacuated, and it showed. With our help today, we were hoping to make the region safe for habitation again. My goal was actually Reactor Four in the Chernobyl Power Station, mostly out of symbolism than any actual need to be there to clear out the radioactivity. That and the idea of standing in the most dangerous room on the planet had a certain appeal to the both of us.

As we made our way over to the distant buildings and the easily identifiable containment arch, we talked and explored. In the distance we saw a small group of people. It wasn’t as dangerous as it used to be around here, and tours lasted longer than they would have even fifteen years ago, with many staying overnight in hotels that had recently started to go up.

“What do you think, son? Should we do this quietly and let them discover it on their own, or should we go big and flashy and tell the whole world?”

Uther seemed to think about this for a bit, then got a big grin on his face. “Flashy, Daddy. Everyone likes flashy!”

I laughed. “Alright, flashy it is, but when I do this, you’ll have to stay out of sight. Remember why?”

“If people knew you were my daddy, they’d never leave me alone any time I came down here.”

“Exactly. When you’re older you can make that decision on your own, but until then it’s better if everyone thinks you’re a normal human kid.”

We continued making our way there on the scenic route, but I could tell his attention was starting to wane. Frankly I was surprised it took as long as it did. We’d already seen the famous landmarks from the photos and video games: the bumper cars, the ferris wheel, the pool, etc. I guess now it was time to show him what I thought the highlight would be, and immediately popped us inside the old reactor.

Uther’s eyes shot wide as he took in what was in front of him.

“Is that it?” he asked.

“Yep,” I replied.

“Doesn’t look like much.”

“It isn’t,” I laughed. “There are a few areas down here that are far more dangerous. Shall we get started?” He smiled widely and ran for the other side of the room. Transforming into Zekken form, I popped a screen up in front of me, allowing me to see the message I was about to send to the world. Positioning myself so that the elephant foot was clearly visible behind me, I smiled widely and held my arms out as I immediately took over every major news channel on the planet with a thought.

“Greetings, everyone! I apologize for interrupting your daily dose of political propaganda masquerading as ‘news’ (air quotes). I’m sure no introduction is needed, but not doing so would be rude. I am Zekken and, as you know, I am here to help guide you towards a better future! As such, we’ll begin today in the past. Forty-nine years ago a catastrophe occurred that was said to be irreversible and would leave this land uninhabitable for thousands of years. Behind me you can see one of the most recognizable symbols of that horrific accident. The Elephant’s Foot was once so dangerous that merely taking a peek at it from around the corner was enough to be fatal. Nowadays, not so much, but still not something you want to be around for too long. Watch.”

Feeling out the radioactivity around us, I made it visible to the naked eye, coloring it green, because when you think nuclear, green comes to mind. At least it does mine. I expanded the effect to cover the dangerous isotopes covering the entire region, pushing the screen out to show the world the extent of the spread of the radiation. Well, the worst of it, which was basically the Exclusion Zone the surrounding region. The actual spread was pretty much worldwide, and most of that wasn’t harmful. This immediate region though, was what was famous, so that’s what I showed everyone. Feeling that everyone got the idea, I zoomed back in on me.

“What I’m about to give you is a gift. I trust that the mistakes of the past, like what happened here, won’t be repeated. So far this is your only home, this small blue planet. Maybe one day you’ll pull your heads out and focus on things that are actually important, and not which political party is the craziest.” I placed my hand against the side of my mouth like I was going to tell everyone a secret, then stage whispered, “Spoiler alert: They all are!” Straightening back up, I smiled again. “And now, on with the show!”

Strictly speaking, I could have done this without moving a muscle, but that would be boring, and it helped people accept that I could do things of this magnitude if I made it look like I actually put in some effort. So I waved my arms around, making it look like I was pulling the dangerous radiation towards me. Uther was bouncing on his toes as he watched, almost about to clap at my theatrics before remembering he was supposed to stay silent during my performance. I shot him a quick wink, then decided I’d pretend to be a character from one of his favorite shows. I couldn't stand it, but it was for my son, and I would do anything for my kids, including pretending to be the most stupidly overpowered character in anime. His eyes nearly bugged out when I brought my hands to my side, holding them about a foot apart as I collected all the radiation between them into an ever expanding ball of lethal energy. I knew weebs around the world were losing their shit right about now, and I would have been one of them as well if I wasn’t the one doing it.

As I sensed the last of the radiation disappear from the land I paused for effect, then I yelled the name of the first Hawaiian king (seriously, look it up), and fired the ball straight up, sending the radiation out into space, mentally dispersing it once no one on Earth could see it. Then I faced my screen again.

“This land is clean now. There are other areas that I intend to visit as well in the near future. Use them well once I am done and pray I don’t have to do this again. Once is an accident, twice is incompetence, anything more is criminal. Learn from your mistakes, don’t cut corners, and for the love of Me, put more money into researching cleaner, safer sources of energy. You’re destroying my planet like this, and I’m not happy about it. With that, I now return you to whatever political manipulations are scheduled for this hour.” I gave a bow, then cut the feed.

“That was so cool!” Uther said as he ran over, imitating what I’d just done with the radiation. I ruffled his hair as his eyes sparkled. “Can we do that again?”

“Not here. I sense this place is about to get very crowded. Want to get some ice cream or something? I know a great place in London.” He grabbed my hand and we were out of there before his head stopped nodding.