Amari

I decide to be patient, reasonable even, in what I ask.

It is hard not to be delicate with Astraea now that I see the state she’s in. She is putting on a brave face, but the marks on her flesh don’t match the size of Idra’s hands. The worst is around her neck, but the hand marks are everywhere I work up the courage to search for them.

“Is there… Anything I can do for you?” I eventually ask, feeling helpless all of a sudden. No spectral hands manifest or smite me where I stand, so I sit down across from Astraea with the intent to hear her out.

Astraea goes still. Her gaze unfocuses long before she works up the courage to speak.. “What is left to do? We have already tried to fix…” The name Ayre dies on her lips as she denies herself the right to speak it.

I… Focus on maintaining the appearance of being supportive. Any judgements I have are secondary to anything I can do to ensure Astraea is okay. “Your side is worth hearing. If there is any doubt, I encourage you to push through them.”

Astraea tries and fails to hold my gaze. “She really tried to. Didn’t leave me any room to doubt her… Sincerity.” Her voice hollows out at that. “On Ayre’s terms, she claimed. Her touch was intended to be a blessing freely given. A token that would prove my sincerity.” Her shoulders and voice fall away into a haunted whisper. “We are all far too late for Ayre to live a life as anything more than….”

When Astraea does not elaborate, I give her a calculated nudge. “What happened?”

Her delicate words become a pained wail. “She hurt them! Lady Midnight swore to me that she merely tried to stir whatever remained of the Divine Mantle of Life in them, to show them that they would not need us to heal themselves! And, in doing so she… We only caused them pain! Enough to deepen whatever divide already exists between Ayre and Lenore’s body.” Astraea buries her face in her hands for a moment, before silently responding to Idra rushing back into the room. “If they’re doing any better, it’s because they fixed it without any input from me or my Goddess.”

The blacksmith swiftly but gently negotiates wrapping Astraea within a tender embrace.

Astraea continues, through panicked sobs. “Senseless! Everything I’ve tried to come and do here has amounted to unnecessary pain to those who have already experienced far too much!”

There is a long silence after that. Idra treats Astraea like she’s made of glass. The longer I think about it, the more I am inclined to think she is right to do so. So much of what I’m hearing frames her Goddess as more in the wrong than Astraea. Did Astraea contest her Goddess’s perspective?

Has the Astraea I’m listening to now caved in? Or are we really dealing with something that even divine gifts are struggling to resolve?

It shouldn’t be unusual at all for divine gifts to get through to even the most outwardly stubborn souls.

When Astrea next feels compelled to speak, all emotion has drained out of her. “Whatever Ayre and Lenore are now, they are no longer not what I have come to save.” Her voice is dry enough that Idra presses a glass into her shaking hands. Astraea spills more than a few drops, prompting Idra’s firm hand to steady the glass enough for Astraea to drink.

Idra and I are treated to a thankful ghost of a smile aimed at both of us in return.

It is a shame I feel the need to press her further. “So what’s your plan?”

Astraea looks at me with empty eyes. “What do you mean? Weren’t you listening?”

I sigh, unsure of how much I should really expect out of her.. “I didn’t hear anything to suggest you remain unwilling to help Ayre and Lenore. Or did you never care about the people attached to your reason for being here?”

“Gales, Amari!” Idra barks in disbelief.

I maintain a hard and unforgiving stare.

Just a little more pressure.

Astraea looks so small as she shrinks deeper into Idra’s embrace. "She’s right. I chose this. But I never wanted… No. I deserve this…”

There’s the guilt I’m looking for. Absolutely poisonous levels of it.

“That’s enough!" I bark, this time in Astraea’s defense. Only belatedly do I realize how much I have shown my fangs and elevated my voice.

And Astraea Wyrmsbane, Midnight’s Herald to the Goddess of Redemption… Flinches at being interrupted.

I’m crossing lines, assuming that Astraea is old and experienced enough to shrug off… A situation that is more complicated than I expected.

She’s not invincible.

And deities aren’t capable of fixing everything.

I need a moment to calm myself before deciding on a different approach.

Astraea tries to turn away, only for Idra to cradle her chin and nudge her into making eye contact. “You made a mistake. So what?”

I softly elaborate, attempting to provide context and reestablish that I’m trying to help. “It’s when you think you know better enough to stop listening to everyone else that has me so upset with you. None of us can do this alone.”

“I should be able to.” Astraea tightens her voice around those words like they are all she has left.

Oh Astraea.

What is it that convinced you, even in a moment of weakness, to believe that you alone can make the only difference that matters?

Is there something you see that we cannot?

“Oh!” Idra takes my thoughtful silence as permission to take a crack at Astraea as she raises an eyebrow. “So you dissolve your crew to protect us and still think you can take on the world alone?”

“That’s not…” Astraea sputters.

Idra turns to me. “Let me guess. Did she try and pull off something similar here? Maybe an attempt at spiriting away this Princess of yours the night before they tie the knot with the Seers?”

There’s no need for me to reply, not when Astraea is already taking Idra’s bait.

“I let everyone down, okay? You try being a force for good and redemption for the whole world as it breaks under your watch!” There is the start of a fire in Astraea’s eyes now. Even as her voice strains, she finds it within her to rise to her feet.

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Her indignation might only be dimly directed at Idra.

But it’s there.

Idra passes Astraea’s attention to me. “Apologies, captain. I’ve got her all warmed up for ya, she-fox..”

I smile, holding back any other expression of amusement as I reach for the most reassuring voice I can. “Astraea. You still get to choose.”

Astraea snarls as she turns to me with something resembling an unvoiced accusation.

“Let me finish.” I make it a soft plea. “We all do. Everyone here has their own areas of expertise and knowledge that helps us make better choices. In choosing what is right for Ayre, you’re cutting them off the rest of the support they’re starting to rely on.”

“That’s what Ayre has been conditioned to respond to.” Astraea replies through clenched teeth and fists.

I can see it in her eyes, that she knows what she’s done is wrong.

“I know. And navigating that balance in order to accommodate Ayre earned you their trust. You should be commended for that. Your dedication is the kind of support that likely played a large part in Ayre deciding to go on and feel safe opening up to others. But the kind of change we’re working toward is going to take more than just you or Ayre.”

Astraea makes an exasperated sound. “This is a terrible environment for Ayre!”

Idra raises an eyebrow. “I’ve been managing just fine. Lunarian groves tend to vary wildly between the tyrants running them, but there’s an acceptance of monsters here on account of the alliance with Vylia that most other places lack.” She thumbs at a bolt thrower on the wall with a design intended to accommodate more than just two arms. “Some of em have gotta earn it, but for the right temperament? Your princess could do far worse than having the favor of Mel’Viora.”

Astraea looks between the two of us, straining her eyes and twisting her lips into a pained grimace. “Fine. Maybe even I can be out of my depth. I wanted to get Ayre the help they need elsewhere, but you’re probably right. Truth be told, I didn’t expect to find a Fevir Sea company representative here. Let alone a familiar face, but I could see excuses under which we could smuggle Ayre and their dolls out.”

I allow myself a wide grin of satisfaction. “Where the powerful crave resources, the resourceful find opportunities.”

Astraea punctuates our exchange slipping back into her chair and penning a rather princely sum into the contract. “Can we just… Are you both done with me yet?”

I lean forward, resting my face in a hand over the counter. “Only if you’re ready to choose to stop beating yourself up. Forget about the rest of us if you need to.” I gesture to the contract. “You’ve already chosen to provide Ayre steady access to addressing any and all material concerns for the near future, entirely independent of those who would demand concessions for this kind of support. But the Seers really aren’t too bad if you let their binding ceremony go through. There is enough grief between them that I think they’ll be good for each other.” I sigh, before deciding to qualify that statement. “Given enough time and space free from the withering gaze of their elders and…” I gesture to myself. “A level head in the room, of course.”

Astraea seems to relax at that as she allows herself to piece together what I have long intended. As the realizations pile up, I watch as she breathes out a sigh of relief. When she speaks, it is the voice of someone who is making peace with her situation. “Idra, draft a letter to Sosima.”

Idra crosses her arms, putting on a serious expression that fails to hide an alighted interest in her eyes. “What do you want to say?”

There’s a long pause before Astraea expresses a hopeful smile. “Tell her I’m… Coming home. Maybe thank her for looking after Jessamine on my behalf? I don’t know. You can tell her I’m hurting, but this isn’t the lowest I’ve sunk.”

Idra shakes her head before spreading yet another parchment in front of Astraea. “You know what? I’ve decided that you’re not my captain anymore. Tell her yourself.”

Astraea looks at Idra, her spaded tail curling as her eyes go wide. “No. That’s… A terrible idea. I’ve been avoiding them for so long. What worth would my words have?”

“Astraea.” Idra leans over her chair, taking Astraea by the chin as she looms over her. “Neither of them would be alive if it weren’t for you. Were you not the first to see Sosima not as a monster, but someone sick and in need of help? Your friends would have killed Sosima without remorse had you not intervened. Jessamine would not fare much better, either having her body taken or remaining a Lich’s plaything if not for your intervention.”

Astraea squirms, silenced before she can issue a reply by a forceful kiss from Idra that leaves her making flustered noises.

“Astraea Bitter Heart, if you’ll forgive me for using your chosen name in front of a stranger, I need this fox to know you as I do.” Idra’s grin only widens as Astraea nods her assent. “Before any acknowledged you as Lady Wyrmsbane or Bone Fist’s daughter, you earned your place as captain of a condemned ship that you crewed with those others would sooner write off. Never forget that it was you who gave Sosima a new body, sprung Greed and I from prisons, bargained for Jessamine’s freedom, and swept Farah off her feet in front of her inquisitor of a father” Idra pauses only to share a wolfish grin as her words bring Astraea to tears.

Astraea nuzzles back into Idra’s embrace, her fingers digging into the latter’s muscled form. “But I couldn’t save Farah. And and Sosima chose s-someone else. You can’t just… I can’t forgive myself for all of this! Not with Ayre and…”

Idra thumbs at Astraea’s cheek, catching the first of many tears. “So what? You can start by choosing to tell Sosima how you feel anyway. Do I really need to remind you that your value is not measured in what you’ve done for us? No one has followed you through storms and shattered lands on account of your parents or some fancy titles. It’s always been on account of who you have always been that pushes you to do right when you see wrongs. Even when it’s not easy. Gales, you’re the one we trust most when things seem hopeless. I assure you, Astraea, all who have ever sailed with you will love and welcome you back with open arms regardless of the state you return to us in.”

Astraea’s breath hitches. “Sosima? L-lov… I don’t deser…” She bites back the word with a fierce intensity as her eyes shoot in my direction, freely drawing blood without so much as a disappointed wag of my tail. “I’m going to struggle to accept that.” Are the words she settles on.

Idra lets out a low bark of a laugh. “Need I remind you that Sosima calls herself a Merchant Princess now? Who do you think she’s trying to impress?” Idra flashes a wink in my direction, much to Astraea’s protest. “Greed even went on to serve as her second when you disbanded us. Do you really think a girl like Sosima, who has never for a moment failed to provide the material needs of all the lives you’ve touched, is going to settle for just one wife?” Idra pushes the parchment more firmly into Astraea’s shaking hands.

We give Astraea all the time she needs to steady her breathing, hands, and dry her tears enough to take up the quill once more.

“Feelings. Ink.” Idra says with a playful growl.

“O-okay.” Astrea stammers. “How I feel. No. How I’ve always felt.”

Standing over Astraea in a way that only I can see, Idra rolls her eyes as she shares a private grin with me.

Still seated across from Astraea, I hide all but fractions of a thankful smile as my tail more openly betrays my satisfaction with this outcome.

Idra watches for a few moments, seeming satisfied with Astraea’s choice of words. “And would it kill you to write to Greed’s kid? Sosima isn’t the only one you secured a new body and all.”

“Of course.” Astraea stops to sob for a moment, her tears staining the page as she pours her heart into what is turning out to be the first of many letters.

To confirm this, Idra produces a number of more pages of parchment.

I take this opportunity to excuse myself. My thoughts race with a newfound understanding of what must be done. Whatever our plans to save my sisters, I must ensure the cost does not demand Astraea’s life.

Sosima’s coin and the resources of a proper merchant company will just have to make up the difference for what we will lose by sending Astraea home to her loved ones..

But just in case, I think it’s time I try to help Ayre pick out a proper ally or two.

No sooner does the thought clarify my intent, a Lunarian with four spiral horns steps into the crafting quarter.

Behind her, two Lunarians in Watcher attire wheel a pair of carts filled with drake scales in my direction.

“I do not believe we’ve met.” The horned Lunarian says by way of greeting. “I am Sapling Seer Eluned. You are one of Ayre’s, yes?”

In the interests of alerting Astraea and Indra, I make my reply as loud as it is formal. “It is as you claim, Sapling Seer. Allow me to humbly introduce myself as a Merchant and Advisor in service to Ayre.” I neglect to mention that Prince Threnodias paid in enough blood to end slavery in the entirety of a neighboring republic’s holdings before claiming my sisters and I as his own.

Eluned wastes no time in getting to the point. “I trust your business with the Siren Armorer Idra has concluded then?”

That she hasn’t immediately called me some beast, threatened me, or expressed the slightest hint of disgust is certainly a point in her favor.

Maybe… Just maybe.

I flash her a sharp smile. “Ayre’s Sworn Blade will be finished with her momentarily. In the meantime, is there a question or two I can run by you about today’s ceremonies?”

Eluned gestures for the watchers to set down the carts before lifting her chin in my direction. “I don’t see why not. Seeing these scales fashioned into a gift for your Seed Prince is the only task that demands my attention before the Binding Ceremony begins in earnest. Seeing as that is more Idra's problem than my own, I'd be happy to answer your questions. Assuming of course you're willing to answer some of my own.”