The Legend of the Tiger (I like the name Tiger, a nice strong name) started in the year 2XXX, the year I was born. Now we might have to fast forward a couple years because even a legend like me struggles when they’re one or two years old. At that time I hadn’t even learned to swear. But you know, the most important thing is that I had a Mama and a Papa and an older sister and they all fucking loved me.

(That’s great Tiger! With my question, I meant more if you could tell us about before you were kidnapped.)

Shut up! I’m the main character in this story. So I had a mother, a father, an older sister and they all fucking loved me. We lived in this apartment building with a doorman and gym and a swimming pool and okay the swimming pool could only fit one person maybe two people if they were tight and the doorman didn’t speak English but these were lifestyle choices. We were rich.

When I was a kid I was at home a lot. I don’t know why. I’m not weak, I don’t get sick. I just needed some time to build strength, to level up. That’s all it was. But I got to spend a lot of time with my family so it was all good. Tigers hunt in packs after all!

(They don’t.)

My Mama, she worked as a receptionist in some company. And my sister, she worked bagging groceries. But my Papa, he was an ‘investor.’

You know, he made money. He told me a lot, looking at the paper, that this company would go up tomorrow. And it would go up. Or that this company would go down. And it’d go down. He’d talk and talk and talk and he’d never make a bad investment. Never ever ever ever. Sometimes he could talk too much. Sometimes he could be angry. But I loved him.

Unlawfully taken from Royal Road, this story should be reported if seen on Amazon.

(Lily, is taking notes really going to be that helpful?)

(Yuri, I’m listening to the story)

But, one day he invested too much. It was an incredible company. They give you - how much? A metric fuck ton of money every month. Every month. You just couldn’t sell for a year, but after that year we’d be SET. We were already rich, but we’d be super rich. The kind of rich where I’d pay you to rub my feet, no, one person for each toe. That kind of stinkin rich!

It was some kind of medicine company. And um, it was a great opportunity for the family. The whole family. My Mama and my sister, they were mad. Really mad. But he already used all the money, for this great opportunity. There was an article in the paper about it, it had a great website, his research was great. And Papa, if they got mad, he could get more mad.

And the company. What happened to the company was…

(Tiger? Are you okay?)

Well, it did well. At first it did really really well. But then the stock went down. Well, it wasn’t a stock, it was like - a bond? a coin? Whatever it was. And then it closed. Boom. The exec fucked us.

And then the apartment, it was gone. I mean, we were still rich. Probably richer than before. Papa and Mama, they each had their own apartment now. And I got to go between them. I mostly lived with Mama. But Papa got a lawyer and said, that, you know, we’ll take on that fucking company and all of us together would buy a great big mansion for all of us together one day.

A few years fly away. Those years weren’t fun. But we won! We won the case. But the company was bankrupt, and we never saw a cent.

We were rich. Absolutely. But it was hard, hard for Mama and Papa to buy a lot of things. I mean, it was a lifestyle choice. Of course it was. Just like their choice to live separately. So, I just started taking things. And taking, and taking, and taking. It turns out, most people don’t get caught.

So I told myself I’d never let me, or my family get fucked with ever again. I’ll fight. That’s the lesson, that’s what you can learn from the Tiger’s tale. If you don't get it, then I'll bash it into you, understand?