Chapter 4

The Punchline

Self Reflection

The self is the path. The self is the greatest ally. The self is the past, the present and future. The self is all.

The self is the trap. The self is the first enemy. The self is the destroyer, the seducer, and the end. The self is all.

We are everything. We are all the good and all the bad.

The self is all and there is no escaping it.

I do not remember closing my eyes, so when I open them I am surprised to find the area around me to be in disarray. Trees are uprooted and tossed aside willy nilly. Boulders are shattered here and split perfectly in half there. The river has been made fallow its streams diverted into smaller puddles and streams.

The grass is gone.

I panic for a moment.

I quickly look for Great Grandfathers body and my heart calms down quickly. His body lays perfectly intact. The grass that had surrounded him was gone, but a layer of leaves had fallen upon him becoming a blanket.

If an outsider were to gaze upon him they would likely think him asleep instead of dead.

I kneel next to him. He is completely untouched by the elements. I thank the leaves and ask them to maintain their vigil over my Great Grandfather for just a little longer.

Then I turn to the destroyed land before me and sigh.

Great Grandfather said I shouldn't break things for no reason. He also said no dinner until I fixed whatever it was that I had broken properly.

If I felt like it I fixed what I broke. If I didn't I regretfully went without dinner. If it were possible I would go without dinner forever if he would wake up.

But there was no time for any of that.

~^~

I am no Terra Fae.

I have to actually speak with the elements to be understood by them and often only if they felt like listening to me. It was actually strange for the winds to be so sociable.

From what I gather it sounds like no one really cares to speak with them at all which I find quite sad really.

Anyway, the Terra Fae often manipulated the world with song. They sang to the trees and the rocks and earth. They sang to the animals the birds and the stars.

Their trees would grow a bit taller. The rocks would be a bit stronger. The earth would be a bit firmer or a bit softer depending on the need, sometimes they would call forth a meteor and level a country that overfished their favorite Kraken species.

When I still had Zaza and Mama I would try to sing along with them.

Storm and Lightning answered my voice.

The Terra said that was rare.

"But I sounded terrible!"

"You did, but that is what they like to hear little storm. Storm and Lightning have terrible taste in music."

You could be reading stolen content. Head to the original site for the genuine story.

I do not like the Terra Fae but the Patriarch at the time found my flailing attempts to keep trying amusing enough to teach me to be at least passable.

He still said I had the voice of a dying boar.

Did I mention I do not like the Terra Fae?

I do not like them. Why none of the Demon Emperors, Grand Councilors, or Alliance Lords never asked me to kill them all is beyond me.

But I digress at the very least I would make use of some of there teachings.

I sang to the earth, to the winds, to the stones, to the waters, to the roots and more.

I sang and the trees stood back up and gathered their broken branches and the wind gathered their fallen leaves. They walked to their proper places and I helped put their branches back where they belong. I carefully put each leaf back where they belonged though I left the leaves resting upon Great Grandfather last.

I sang again and the stones big and small gathered and I painstakingly put each and every one of them back to their proper place, like a big puzzle.

I don't like puzzles.

I sang to the river… I sang to the tide. I never knew quite understood the nature of water. It was simply beyond me, but I put my best step forward. It was the least I could do.

I sang to the grass and to the insects big and small.

I sang and sang until my voice became hoarse and I couldn't do it anymore. Then I rested. I rested next to Great Grandfather.

When I woke I bid the place I meditated on goodbye and good fortune. I placed the leaves that had sheltered him back to there proper place then I carefully picked Great Grandfather up and placed him upon my back.

He was much lighter than before.

I turned toward the Thumb Mountain and took two steps forward.

~^~

And stood in the shadow of the Thumb Mountain.

~^~

From a distance the average Finger Mountain looks like it may be touching the sky. That if they are allowed to grow just a bit taller that they might touch space.

Up close a Finger Mountain IS the sky. It is the clouds and the space.

The difference between the Mountain and the sky, the clouds and the void of space are one and the same. There is nothing above that the Mountain is not… and some say it is dangerous to suggest it be otherwise within the shadow of a Finger.

That is what my scroll tells me at least.

I don't disagree being able to truly see it for myself. It was morning when I left the place I chose to rest at. I cannot feel the sun so close to the Mountain.

Instead I feel the Moon and Stars. I feel the Night here… I look up at the Mountain.

It is covered in mist to deep to see through, a few trees puncture the mist. There is the beating mules of beasts echoing through it, there is the whispering secrets of night flowing through it, there is the cries of the lost sneaking through the clouds.

I look at my scroll again and then back at the Mountain.

A staircase that was not there before sits. It is made of cool stone and rough pavement. It leads into the mist and gives no clue to where it may end. I can only hope it goes up… because if it does not.

I will break this Mountain.

~^~

I expected the climb to be a lonely one. I figured that maybe just maybe… I would get to fight something, but no such luck pervades my path.

Instead all I meet are people. A lot of people.

I thought this Mountain was supposed to be dangerous or something. I just feel… overwhelmed I guess? All the people I pass are either walking down the steps of the staircase or sitting upon them. Some are heavily injured, some are missing limbs and appendages.

Some are small, some are huge to the point that they should really not need stairs. Some have multiple limbs. Some are adorned poorly, others are over adorned in silks and gems. Some are much too young to be walking down a mountain let alone climbing up it. Some are much too old.

All are silent to an inhuman degree. All shield their faces from me, so I can't quite recognize them no matter how hard I try.

But still I cannot help but feel familiar with all of them, but I have a hard time putting my finger on where… well if it was important I would remember it eventually… probably. Maybe.

I decided instead of trying to figure out who these people I would instead start telling Great Grandfather stories, not about embarrassing stuff though. Before he left this world for good I wanted him to know more about me. I wanted him to know about my other families from other worlds.

It was a little selfish I think but I am hoping he would forgive me that. I am a princess of course!

"Princesses are allowed to be a bit selfish after all!" He would say. I never really spoke with any princesses before so I had taken him at his word. I definitely killed quite a few though!

I began my story when my name was Tori, daughter of Varima and Selca! I was of the Siva Fae!

~^~

I lost track of time as I climbed the stairs of the Mountain. In fairness I had been engrossed in telling Great Grandfather my story I didn't really care to.

The Mountain was tall and I had a lot to tell and to be perfectly honest the abridged version really cut out a lot of details!

But the Mountain wasn't that tall… I knew because as I finished my story I realized I had made it to the last step… I hadn't even noticed that those who journeyed down below had stopped doing so in there entirety.

Instead they now looked up at me and I could finally recognize some of them.

One I recognize more immediately steps forward.

She looks me in the eyes with a strange look in her own. She speaks softly but with conviction.

"Did… did we win? The Hero… did he win?"

Huh. I guess that is something that would be important to her.

"Yeah he won."

"Oh."

"Yep. You guys did a good job setting him up. Just a little less and I might have pulled through in the end."

"Oh."

Tears form in the apparitions eyes before crystallizing and shattering. The conviction that once firmed her slipping away. The apparition collapses on to her knees sobbing.

"We did it? We really did it?"

"Yes. Yes. You did it. You did great.

"You're not mad?"

"Why would I be mad?"

"Y-You lost?"

The words don't seem real to the ghost.

"I got to do what I loved, for just short of three hundred thousand years. I got to kill all kinds of things. I got to see all kinds of new and exciting people and exotic creatures and kill them. I bore witness to phenomena unrecorded by historians because I destroyed them.

I sigh a little at all the nostalgia.

"I loved what I did and if I could do it all over again with the knowledge that it would end all the same. I would choose the same path every time."

I looked at all those assembled before me. I had nothing to hide. I had nothing to regret.

"I was me to the very end."

I turned away from them and took the last step.