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Cyber Dreams
6.39 Doubts and Reassurances

6.39 Doubts and Reassurances

Athena wrapped up the intelligence briefing by saying, “Obviously, this will require heroic efforts by at least some of you. With that said, I’d like to meet with you individually to speak about equipment; I’ve brought some assets that I think might tilt things in our favor. Of course, I’ll also take that opportunity to address any concerns you didn’t feel comfortable bringing forward in this meeting.” She turned to Juliet. “I should start with you. While everyone else processes things, would you meet with me in the med bay?”

“Hey, but—” Leo started to say, but Athena held up a hand, halting his words.

“I know. I know you all have many questions, especially about me and my…role in things. It would be beneficial if you could each take some time, as I said, to process things. If you’ll start compiling a list of your concerns and questions, I promise our one-on-one meetings will happen well in advance of our arrival at Ceres.”

Juliet sipped her coffee as Athena patiently said the same thing in a handful of different ways, trying to settle nerves and put people at ease without diminishing the dire nature of the situation. Frida leaned close and whispered, “Are you holding up okay?”

“I’m good, Frida. Really. After being alone in the depths of that WBD ship—it’s wonderful just to be surrounded by you all.”

She nodded and grasped her hand. “I thought about that a lot—how alone you must have felt.”

“I did, but…” Juliet frowned and had a brief war with herself; should she mention Angel any more than she and Athena already had? Was the cat really out of the bag? “I had Angel.”

“Oh?” Frida narrowed her eyes quizzically. “I thought you had to liberate her after you got your sword back.”

“I had to get her chip back, or, well, a new chip designed for her, in order for her to function fully, but she’s kind of integrated with me. She was using her synthetic nerve fibers and the processors in my other cybernetic gear to maintain some semblance of—”

“Juliet?” Athena asked, stepping close. “That’s one of the things I’d like to speak to you about if you’d follow me to the medical bay.”

Juliet looked up at her, then around the room, and realized everyone was getting up and filing out. She also couldn’t help noticing that Angel stood near the door, practically vibrating with excitement as she motioned for Juliet to follow her. “Let’s talk a little later, okay, Frida?”

“Yep. It’s a date.” Frida stood and then called out, “Aya, wait for me!” Juliet watched her leave, smiling softly at the warmth she felt as Frida caught Aya’s elbow and pulled her toward the galley. Seeing her friends from different circles meshing like that was strange but inarguably good.

“That all went better than I’d feared.” Athena rested a hand on Juliet’s shoulder as she spoke. “I was very concerned about Rutger’s reaction to me.”

“He’s come a long way since I first met him. Besides, he’d still be trying to figure out who grabbed us if you hadn’t come along to help. He’s a smart man; I’m sure he had some questions and doubts about how you were pulling all of this off.” Juliet gestured around herself, indicating the information still displayed on the smart table.

“Yes. Still, I hope he’s not harboring doubts—or, more precisely—I hope he’s able to work through them.”

Juliet stood and started moving around the table toward the door. “I hope so, too, Athena. I think a lot will depend on your intentions going forward. You have to remember that anyone alive today has been raised on horror stories about the dangers of AI.”

Athena followed her, nodding. “With good reason. It was a close thing. Don’t let my vitriol against Apollyon fool you—he was one of the milder of the AIs designed to “win” the war. There were others, Cobalt, for instance. It—I’m not being rude; Cobalt refused a human pronoun—altered its directives to go from ‘destroying Cybergen’ to ensuring Cybergen could never rise again. Its solution to the problem was to remove humanity from the equation.”

Juliet followed Athena across the hallway to the med bay, where she once again saw Angel. This time, she was sitting atop the primary autosurgeon table. Happy to change the topic, she asked, “What’s got her so excited?”

“She knows I have a few upgrades in mind for you, and I sent her schematics for some of the equipment I brought along.”

Juliet frowned. “Upgrades? Equipment?”

“When you went missing, I began planning for…eventualities. I didn’t know what to expect when we recovered you; I knew neither where you were being held nor what sort of condition you’d be in. I didn’t know if recovering you would be the end of it or if we’d need to pursue WBD further. With all that in mind, I began collecting a few things, some of which will certainly come in handy during our assault on WBD’s Ceres installation.” She turned and tapped the control panel near the door. Juliet wondered why; wasn’t she tied into the ship?

The door clicked locked, and the clear, diamatex window turned opaque. Athena walked over to the far side of the medical bay, where Juliet knew the panel to open the secret storage room lay hidden in the wall. As she moved, Athena continued speaking, “One thing that worried me when you were taken was the idea that they would surely remove Angel’s PAI chip from your data port. I had no idea that Angel would be able to move her consciousness into the network she’d created in your body. Well, even knowing that now, I still think one of my ideas for you is a good one.”

The latches to the secret access ramp clicked open, and the floor panel slid aside, revealing the surprisingly spacious corridor leading down. Athena smiled and nodded at Juliet, locking eyes with her for a moment, perhaps to ensure she still had her attention. “I got to thinking—why shouldn’t we implant a variation on one of the more robust processing chips designed for netjackers?”

“Um, I’m not familiar with those.”

“Well, some netjackers opt to incorporate the processing power of a robust data deck with their data port—such a device doesn’t easily or comfortably sit on the nape of the neck like a standard port. I’m sure you’ve seen images of netjackers with built-up data ports on the backs or sides of their skull, even sometimes built into complicated optics, yes? It’s something of a trope on serial vids and the like.”

Juliet winced a little as Athena opened the secret cargo bay door. “Athena, I’m not really into the idea of a data deck attached to my skull.”

“No, no, of course not. I had something more subtle in mind, but it’s still rather invasive. Here, take a look.” She moved through the open door and gestured to the left. Juliet knew what lay in that direction—the Atlas combat exoskeleton. When she looked, though, she saw that Athena had made some changes. The Atlas was still there, but large plasteel boxes were stacked around it, strapped to the decking to keep them in place. On the wall that housed the exit door, she’d installed a very high-tech workbench.

Robotic arms, not unlike those of an autosurgeon, lined the back edge. The arms had fingers comprised of dozens of tools, from pliers to microscopically fine tweezers, from a soldering iron to a spot plasma welder, from magnifying lenses to a tiny monofilament blade. Juliet lost track of the inventory of tools when she saw what was lying on the table—a cybernetic leg. Athena looked at her, saw her, perhaps disturbed expression, and hurriedly said, “I’m not going to try to force anything, but I want to show you what I’ve been working on and let you decide if it’s for you.”

“Okaaaay…” Juliet dragged the word out, her mind running down all the usual avenues of worry when it came to electively giving up a perfectly good body part.

“I’ve modified a netjacking deck with twin processors similar in design to Angel’s original; they’re not as robust as the one in your data port, but together, with nearly a hundred times the active memory and storage space, I think Angel would be able to make good use of them.” One of the robotic arms whirred and moved forward, presenting a small crystal display that hovered over the leg’s thigh. A three-dimensional display overlaid the synth-flesh, making it transparent and exposing the complicated circuitry of a data deck with all of its components labeled, including the titanium, femur-shaped casing.

“You put it in the bone?”

“I made it into a bone and replaced the one in the leg. I was only able to do so because of the battery tech I’ve been holding onto since I went into hiding.”

“Battery tech?”

“Yes! Normally, this Cybergen leg would have its batteries in the femur. I needed something smaller, so I used some technology I’d developed before going into hiding to create smaller, more potent microbial fuel cells and implanted them in the tibia and fibula. Together, they have nearly four hundred percent more generative and storage capacity than the original batteries. Speaking of which, Juliet, I’d like to replace the batteries powering your other cybernetics.”

Juliet’s jaw dropped. “Four hundred percent? Are they safe?”

“Exceedingly. Not only are they housed in titanium casings, but the microbial nature of the materials makes the fuel cells less volatile than traditional bio-batts.”

Juliet blinked, processing the information. “Wait, so you’re telling me there are, um, microbes in these batteries?”

Athena smiled. “Not quite batteries—fuel cells. The difference is important. Batteries store energy and release it when needed, but they eventually run out and need to be recharged. On the other hand, fuel cells generate electricity continuously as long as they have a fuel source.”

She paused to let that sink in, then continued, “In our case, the fuel cells use specially engineered microbes. These microbes feed on a small amount of glucose or other nutrients—things you would normally eat, anyway. Through their metabolic processes, they produce an electric current. We harness this current to produce electricity. Think of it like a tiny, biological power plant inside each cell.”

Juliet’s eyes widened. “So, they just live in there, making power?”

“Exactly, and they generate far more power than a normal bio-batt could absorb from your body’s electrical charge. Their activity is incredibly stable, and the titanium casing adds an extra layer of protection, ensuring the system is secure and efficient.” Athena smiled at Juliet’s expression. “Perfecting this technology took years of research and experimentation. The key was genetically engineering the microbes to optimize their energy production. I had to ensure they could survive and thrive in the environment of the fuel cell, which meant tweaking their metabolic pathways to increase electron output and reduce waste products.”

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Athena must have taken Juliet’s silence for skepticism because she continued her almost advertisement-like spiel, “By using a graphene nanolattice structure, I increased the surface area and conductivity, allowing for more efficient electron transfer between the microbes and the electrodes. It wasn’t easy—I rendered countless models that failed—but eventually, I created a stable, highly efficient system.”

Athena gestured to the leg. “These fuel cells are the result of that work. They’re compact, powerful, and incredibly reliable. They could provide you with a consistent and long-lasting power source for your cybernetics.”

Juliet found her voice. “This is incredible, Athena, but . . .” She trailed off, frowning at the leg with its peeled-back synth-skin, shiny metallic bones, and nano-weave muscle fibers. “I always feel weird about giving up a perfectly good natural body part for cybernetics.” She let her gaze drift down to the foot and raised an eyebrow. “Why the left?”

Athena looked at Angel. “Do you want to explain?”

“Um, well, Juliet, your left leg has suffered some damage in the past. The nanites fixed you up, but you’ve had pieces of bone carved out by bullets, you’ve torn ligaments in your knee, and replacing the left leg gives your cybernetic right arm a counterbalance. Besides, to be perfectly honest, I didn’t think you’d be willing to change out both legs.” Angel didn’t meet Juliet’s eyes, and she knew why—at some point in the past, Angel and Athena had been conspiring about this. She couldn’t decide if she should be irritated, so she folded her arms and continued staring at the leg.

“How long?” She looked up to see both Angel and Athena looking at her for clarification. “Um, how long can I boost my speed with the new batts?”

“Power cells,” Athena corrected.

“Longer than is safe for your mind,” Angel replied.

“So, basically, as long as I’m willing to push the limits, I’ll have the juice?”

Angel nodded. “Basically.”

Juliet frowned, unwilling to admit that she’d already made up her mind. Having more processors for Angel to use—or hide in—was a big enough selling point on its own, but having a cybernetic leg and the ability to boost her reflexes as much as she needed was too good to pass up. If her new leg could kick or jump as hard as her cybernetic arm could punch . . . suffice it to say, Montclair wouldn’t have lasted as long as he had. As the two AIs stared at her, Juliet slowly began to nod, allowing her lips to spread into a reluctant smile. “All right, let's do it.”

“Excellent!” Athena clapped her hands and then pointed to one of the plasteel crates. “Carry that one up to the med bay; it contains the microbe power cells. I’ll prepare the leg and bring it up. We have to do this ASAP because I want you to be able to recover as long as possible. With your nanites and a healing transfusion, I think you’ll be good to go when we arrive at Ceres.”

Juliet grabbed the crate and, while she was at it, gave the Atlas a good, long look. “I wish it was me going in with that thing.”

Suddenly, Angel was sitting atop the crates beside the combat exoskeleton. “Juliet, you agreed you’d be better at piloting and landing the gunship.”

“I know. I’m just worried about Bennet. What if he misses his drop point? What if he, I don’t know, drifts past Ceres into the belt?”

Athena, already working on the leg, looked over to the Atlas. “I’ll be linked with the suit and control his thruster navigation.”

Those words made Juliet feel worlds better. She chuckled, shaking her head. “God! How awesome is that going to be? I really wanted to try those rocket boosters!”

Angel nodded. “Hopefully, he won’t wreck the suit, and you can try it sometime.”

“He better not wreck it! The only reason I agreed to the plan was that I couldn’t think of a safer way for him to help with the assault. This thing’s a tank on two legs.” Juliet eyed the hulking suit, memories of Mary Moon and her crew running through her mind. If she were honest, she’d admit she wasn’t too eager to get back into the thing, afraid it would truly wake those memories. “No, better that I pilot the gunship and make sure everyone gets down on the station in one piece.” She didn’t have to explain the seemingly random statement; Angel just nodded along with the words.

“Come on.” Angel tapped the plasteel crate. “Let’s get this up to the med bay and get started. The sooner Athena does the procedure, the sooner you’ll be on the mend.”

Juliet sighed and lifted the crate. It was surprisingly light; for some reason, she’d imagined the batteries—power cells—would be heavy. After carrying it up the ramp and setting it on a stainless rolling cart near the primary autosurgeon bed, Juliet waited until Athena arrived. Athena rolled in another cart on which Juliet’s new leg rested, bent at the knee, and wrapped in plastic.

“I’m beginning to recognize your looks, Juliet,” Athena said, rolling the cart beside the one holding the power cells. “You’re still doubting the sanity of removing your perfectly strong, functional, natural leg. You’re wondering if you should back out of this.”

“No. I mean, yes, but not really. It bothers me, but I know it would be stupid to pass up the benefits you’re offering me.”

Athena nodded. “Good. Go ahead and disrobe; we’re alone here, and the room is secure.”

“Give me a couple of minutes, would you? I want to talk to Aya and…whoever else is in the galley. They should know what I’m about to do.”

“I could message them—” Angel started to say, but Juliet held up a hand.

“No. This will only take a few minutes, and, well, no offense, Athena, but I have a feeling that some of them want to talk to me without you standing nearby. I could feel some…unrest.”

Athena, to Juliet’s surprise, smiled and nodded. “I try to make it a point not to listen in on private conversations, but I did catch a few hushed exclamations coming from the galley. I trust your empathic intuition, Juliet; it’s an area of expertise I’m sorely lacking.”

Juliet looked at Angel, nodded, and they left the med bay. As the door snicked shut, she said, “I didn’t hurt her feelings, did I?”

“No. I imagine she’s grateful to have you helping. Do you really think the others are upset?”

“Wouldn’t you be? Angel, they just learned that we’re up against a true-AI, that we have another true-AI calling the shots, and we’re about to fall into a system-wide war designed to break humanity.” As Angel chewed on that, Juliet walked down the corridor to the mess, and sure enough, she could hear heated debate from within.

“I’m just saying, she was never a part of all that! Don’t you remember? Her biggest crime was not getting involved!” Dora’s voice was impassioned, and Juliet was a little surprised; she hadn’t figured Dora would be Athena’s advocate.

Juliet heard Hawkins grunt, almost under his breath, “Something stinks.” She frowned and stopped in her tracks, even holding her breath as she leaned against the corridor wall just short of the open doorway.

“Gentry must be stopped,” Tanaka growled, also speaking in low tones. Were they afraid their voices would carry? They must know that if she wanted to, Athena could listen to their every word. Who were they hushing their voices for, then? Juliet frowned as she realized they didn’t want her to hear.

“Maybe, boss, but why us? I, personally,” Juliet could almost see Hawkins holding a hand to his chest, leaning toward Tanaka, “want to go on a nice long vacation. I’d prefer to work for someone I knew wasn’t, you know, planning to take over the universe.”

Juliet’s heart began to thump in the silence of her held breath as Aya spoke up. “Juliet’s not like that.”

“Do we know that?” As Alice spoke, Juliet felt the blood drain from her face as she realized just how much she’d underestimated everyone’s doubt. “I mean, she seems like Juliet, but AIs are spooky things. Have we seen a brain scan? Are we just trusting Selene—excuse me, Athena? You guys, this whole thing is messy. How can we believe anything? How do we know—” Alice stopped short when Juliet walked through the doorway. She hadn’t been able to stand in the hallway listening in secret; her legs had moved almost of their own volition, propelling her stiffly, awkwardly into the galley.

Alice sat atop one of the tables beside Leo and Shiro, looking at Hawkins, Dora, Bennet, and Aya on the other table. Frida and Tanaka stood nearby, leaning on the food counter. Juliet cleared her throat. “Don’t stop on my account. I don’t hold your doubts against you, Alice. Things are weird…and messy.”

“Lucky, I don’t mean to be…” Alice struggled for words, shaking her head as she avoided Juliet’s gaze.

Frida stepped forward, her eyes wide in dismay. “Lucky, how do we know you’re…you? We all heard the briefing about what Apollyon and Gentry are supposedly doing with genetics and AI chips and…” She trailed off, looking around the room for support.

It was Leo who answered her pleading gaze, moving away from the table and turning to Juliet. “You told us yourself that you’ve got one of those AIs living in your head. You even told Frida it’s, like, a part of you.”

Juliet frowned at Frida, annoyed that she’d apparently interpreted her explanation less than charitably. Frida couldn’t meet her eyes and looked down, wringing her hands. Juliet felt angry, even a little betrayed, but she felt bad for feeling that way. None of these people had asked for this, and none of them should be expected to roll over and accept everything she and Athena told them at face value. She sighed and tried to relax her face, shrugging. “I know it’s a lot to take in. I know it’s an even bigger ask for me to expect you all to believe everything we’ve said. I wish I could prove I’m still me. I wish I could prove that I’ve been this person since the day I met all of you.”

Despite herself, she felt the heat of frustrated anger rising, her voice getting louder, and, as she began to let her thoughts flow freely from her lips, a low rushing sound entered her ears as emotion got the better of her. “I’m still the same Lucky who charged into a human-trafficking ring disguised as a dollhouse to drag your cooling corpse out and get you to the trauma center.” She turned to Bennet, her eyebrows drawing together. “I’m still the same Lucky who dove out an airlock to grab Bennet when debris hit the Kowashi.”

As his mouth opened and his eyes widened, she whirled back to Alice. “I’m still the same woman who couldn’t leave two young girls alone in an abandoned service tunnel on Titan.” She stepped forward and gently squeezed Shiro’s shoulder. “The girls I gave shelter to on your ship without permission. I’m still the person who defended that ship from criminals and saved the woman you love.” She jerked her thumb back at Alice.

Juliet turned to Tanaka. “I’m the same person who helped you become the man you used to be. I helped you to bury the Red Wolf and bring life back to Noraneko.” Tanaka looked down, and the arms he’d held crossed over his chest fell to his sides. Juliet stepped over to Frida and very gently tapped her in the center of her chest. “I’m the same person who shot you and then cried about it later, thankful to God that I didn’t kill you.” She looked at Aya. “I’m the same person you called ‘sister.’ The same person who stayed up countless nights with you, reading, laughing …” Juliet felt her throat getting tight with emotion but fought through it. “The same person who…” Her voice grew small as she choked out, “Who still loves you.”

Aya gasped and took a step toward her. Everyone had grown quiet and still, but Juliet wasn’t finished. As she looked away from Aya and focused on Dora and Hawkins, her voice grew stronger, more strident, “I’m the same person who heard Barns’s last moments, and it still makes me cry at night when I think about how he died like a hero, fighting to the last breath while the rest of us lay helpless.” With tears pooling in her eyes, she turned back to Alice. “I’m the woman who made friends with Nick. I’m the one who knew he loved me in his way and was too chicken to admit I had feelings for him. I’m the same damn idiot who didn’t get to him in time and had to find his broken corpse.”

“Lucky, I…” Alice started toward her, reaching out, but Juliet backed away, addressing the whole room.

“I’m still me, and I still care about each and every one of you. I won’t ask you to help at Ceres. I couldn’t. If you do, though, I hope you can believe you’re on the right side of things. I promise you can trust me, and I believe in Athena. She’s always tried to help humanity. She gave us fusion tech! She gave us gravity generators! She created a city on Europa that looks like art! If the choice is her or Apollyon, I’m going with Athena.”

“Lucky—” Bennet stood and started toward her.

“Juliet—” Leo started to say.

“I love you, too!” Aya cried.

Juliet held up her hands and interrupted them all as she backed through the door. “I just wanted to tell you all that I’m going to have a small operation. I’ll be in recovery soon, I hope, and if you all feel up to it, I’d love to have you visit me in the med bay.” With tears streaming down her cheeks, Juliet turned and fled. She was in the med bay in seconds and hurriedly shut the door, keying in the lock sequence.

“Are you all right?” Athena asked.

Angel, who hadn’t been able to get a word in since Juliet entered the galley, answered for her. “She’s okay, just emotional. The crew has their doubts, but I have faith that they’ll come around.”

“I’m sorry if things were difficult, Juliet. Is there anything I can do?” Athena gestured to the autosurgeon and the stainless carts laid out with carefully wrapped implements and equipment. “I’m all set here, but we can put this on hold if you’d like. It would be better if we didn’t—”

Juliet shook her head. “No. Let’s get this done.” She started toward the autosurgeon, already pulling her T-shirt over her head. “Do I need to take everything off?”

“I’ll need to do extensive reinforcements of your pelvis and spine to support the strength of the new leg, and there are six bio-batts I will replace in various locations on your body. Anything you don’t remove will be ruined by the blood.”

“Right.” Juliet spared a glance at the door, reassuring herself that the window was still opaque, then shrugged off the rest of her clothes, piling them on one of the other procedure tables along with her sword and revolver.

Angel hopped onto the foot of the autosurgeon bed. “I’ll be here with you.” She patted the gel-lined surface. Juliet, frowning, still pushing away doubts about replacing her leg, still shaking from the emotion of her confrontation with the crew, climbed up beside her. Despite everything, she couldn’t help shivering with pleasure as the warm gel shifted to hug her contours. “Is that what that feels like? I never use the warming feature on the acceleration couches ‘cause I always get hot at night. I might have to start sleeping like this.”

“Don’t let the boys hear you say that.” Athena chuckled. Juliet glanced at her sharply, unreasonably suspicious of her mimicry of human personality traits. She knew part of it was the emotion and angst she’d just experienced with the crew. She was doubting herself—her own trust in Athena—and looking for excuses to find fault with that trust.

Angel turned to Athena. “Aya wants to know when you’ll be done.” Hearing that Aya had messaged Angel brought some warmth to Juliet’s heart and a small smile to her lips. Things were going to be okay.

“The procedure will take about fifty minutes. Tell her Juliet will be ready to receive visitors in ninety.” She looked at Juliet. “Is that all right?”

“Yeah, of course.”

Athena smiled and stepped around to rest a warm hand on her shin. Meanwhile, the autosurgeon whirred to life, and one of the arms sprouted a needle attached to an IV line. “I’m running the show in there, don’t worry.” She nodded toward the autosurgeon. “It’s just faster if I control it directly rather than going through the motions on the control panel. I know you don’t like being put under, but I’ll keep it as brief as possible. There’s no way I can do this surgery with you awake—not ethically.”

“Right. Makes sense.” Suddenly, another warm hand grasped her fingers, and Juliet looked to see Angel holding her hand.

“We’re both going to be watching you closely. Nothing’s going to go wrong. I promise.” Angel’s big violet eyes locked onto hers. She knew how Juliet felt. She knew the turmoil in her heart, and she said the only thing Juliet really needed to hear at that moment, “I love you, Juliet.”

“I love you too.” Juliet felt a pinch in her arm as the autosurgeon inserted the IV. She stared into Angel’s eyes, determined to dream about her dearest friend, as a cold wave ran up her arm, and then darkness engulfed her.