3.6
“Maybe one day I can create place where no one would judge me for being by your side. You know...”
“Ha! You mean, you would become the queen and outlaw anyone who talk crap about me!”
“I am being serious here, John!”
“Being serious? Nice to meet you, I am indeed John.”
“Johnny!”
“Alright, alright. I get what you are saying. It isn’t a bad idea at all. If anything, I myself want to do that instead of having you resorting to your elf lineage. Maybe that would be better…?”
The old conversation that she once had disappeared as soon as it came to her. It was immediately replaced by a memory that she remembered as clear as day, one that she often recalled to herself in secret.
Raina who recently reached her ninth birthday had been summoned to throne room early in the morning as usual.
This day, she expected another series of tutoring from elves of different expertise to prepare her when she succeeds the throne. Instead of the familiar faces of her fellow teachers Raina was greeted by Queen Veissa herself.
The Elven Queen sat on her throne where the sun rays sparkled and shone, her ageless beauty and calm demeanor all present while she smiled fondly at her daughter.
However, this was not what surprised Raina, right behind her mother was a fidgeting boy who stared cautiously at his surroundings.
“This is my daughter Raina Valindra Eridi, she is only three years younger than you. But don’t let that fool you, we elves mature mentally quicker, so her mental state is similar to yours if not more. Do try to get along with her.”
“Yes.”
Raina creased her brows and sized the individual in front of her. He had short black hair and sharp dark eyes that relentlessly scanned his surroundings.
For Veissa to address the boy affectionately as she would to Raina herself was a strange phenomenon itself, added the fact that the boy was stated a human, the gears in Raina’s mind turned.
“Oooh…” she let out a goofy grin as she stared at the boy like the entertainment deprived predator she was. Only to quickly stiffen her face before anyone could notice.
A rare specimen had appeared before her. A human friend who she could befriend.
Given that elves have long live spans, many of them bear a small number of children, this meant that Raina who was the only elf who was under the age of 18 had little to no peers.
Will he like me for who I am?
It was a natural response for someone like her who was depraved of unfiltered interaction with others, a relationship with someone who did not sugarcoat their words when speaking to her. In A’vetheas, the elves simply regarded Raina as the Elven Princess, addressing her in that title of hers without a care of who the person was behind it.
Raina quickly shook her head at that thought.
No, no, just having him to play with me will be enough. I-I…
Tingles sprawled across her spine, her heart pounded harder and harder as she observed the rare specimen. Gushes of warm blood flowed along her arteries, flooding her brain with untold excitement.
Raina could do it, with a little conditioning, she would have the boy be her perfect playmate, her good friend.
“Raina, this is John Sarvod. He originated from the eastern continents, and will be living in A’vetheas as a part of the Elven Tribe from this day onwards. Please take care of him as you would to a sibling.”
John? John, that’s a nice name. I can call him Johnny. Ehehehe...
Having said that, Queen Veissa nudged John from behind her with a soft hand on his back.
“Go on, Raina wouldn’t hurt you.”
John remained stationary. Unwilling to move from his spot, he stared at Queen Veissa with his dark eyes.
“John, you are to live with us from today onwards. It may be hard for you but do try your best to live among the elves. Is that clear?”
“I-I understand, Queen Veissa,” his reply was stiff.
“Raina, would you mind showing John around A’vetheas? Have him pick a room to his liking in the palace.”
“M-me? H-he is a human you know? I-it’s not that I disapprove…” Raina played a facade of disinterest to cover up her exponential increase interest towards John.
But her voice faltered the longer she stared.
Unable to control herself, Raina’s face finally broke into a grin.
She would have someone to follow her around, to have a friend where she could share her secrets with, she would be able to have John escort her around A’vetheas, she would be tell him her stories from her favorite books. And then, and then…
“And there you have it John, this daughter of mine would sooner hug you than to isolate you,” Queen Veissa spoke up as little Raina drooled over how she would befriend John. “If anything, she might be attached to you more than myself. I don’t particularly blame her… We elves don’t often have many children.
“Her disconnect with the other elves... I fault myself for that,” Veissa continued while she looked the drooling Raina regretfully.
“…”
“That’s why, John, I encourage you to remain unrestrained around her. There is no need for formalities when you interact with her. However, do keep mind your actions when any of you are under public eye.”
“I think I understand, Queen Veissa,” John nodded.
“If there is anything more, you can request it from Raina— As soon as she breaks from that daze of hers.”
After John nodded at her words, Veissa silently exited through the grand doors at the very opposite of the throne room, draped her silk dress across the polished marble with the upmost grace.
John observed the young Raina who was drooling at her delusions with a titled head.
Just moments ago Raina was completely composed and distant, after a few words from her mother, her personality took a complete turn.
It was oddly endearing in its own way.
“Umm...I am supposed to pick a room, then maybe a meal after I shower?”
Raina stopped fantasizing when she heard his voice.
“Ahh...?” she let out a small voice.
John approached her and stared into her turquoise eyes.
“Princess? Princess Raina? About my room?”
Raina regained her focus and straightened her dress. “Before that, my mother may have mentioned my name but I want to reintroduce ourselves to each other officially, is that fine?”
John pursed his lips, it was unnecessary for him. Names either stick themselves to his mind or they would slip him completely.
In her case, he was certain that her name stuck, if not for her character.
“Right… My name is John Sarvod, I am twelve.”
“I am Raina Valindra Eridi, the Elven Princess. Do your best to remember my name and call me with upmost affection. As someone who will be my dearest friend, I shall allow you to call my by my name Raina. You may be human, but I will think of you as in equal.”
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She had her hands on her hips, her head held proudly as tried to contain her busting excitement. That should do it, he would definitely like me now.
“Princess Raina—”
The elf girl’s face turned into a scowl, “It is Raina! We are equals, do not call me Princess!”
“Why do I have to say your name with that much affection, Princess? And you talk about equal but the first thing you do is give me an order.” John lifted an eyebrow at Raina.
“Princess—! That’s what friends—”
“Hahaha, do you ever listen to what you say? Or is that how an elf princess talks? With a stiff snobbish attitude, and all of that.”
Raina’s face flushed beet red, her face froze at John’s words, who knew that in her attempts to contain her excitement, she let herself slip and imposed a pompous attitude onto someone that she wished to impress.
Yet, she could not stop herself. Raina wasn’t going to be embarrassed on her first meeting with John.
“Y-you! You better know your place! I am the Princess, I can have your head w-whenever I want, show me more respect!” she hissed.
Ahhhhhh!!! I messed up!!!
“Alright, alright, Princess Raina. I won’t make mistake like that again. Please accept my sincerest apology,” John got down to a knee and lowered his head at the fuming little elf. “So much for being a friend who is her equal…” John whispered.
“What did you say!?” Raina barked.
“This is my sincerest apology, Princess Raina.”
“I clearly heard something else. Speak it out loud if you dare!”
“No, I wouldn’t dare disrespect you...”
John raised his head from the floor, he made sure to lock his eye with Raina, giving her a full display of his sincerity.
“…Princess.”
The moment he spat out the last word, the calm face of John was replace by a cheeky grin and curved slits for his sharp eyes, there was absolutely zero shred of regret from the for what he said.
“You idiot! You idiot! I wanted our first meeting to be proper, since you are the same age as me, I thought you could be my friend! You are a terrible person, John! I hate you!”
She burst out crying, rubbed her eyes as she turned away from him, covering her tear filled face as to not embarrass herself even more.
John gritted his teeth at how the elf girl was, he had thought to start off a joke with Raina to ease the awkward atmosphere, but doing so only pricked his heart.
“Maybe that was too far… It’s my fault then… I won’t do it again.”
“Hic...hic...hic… Go away...find the stupid room yourself…”
“...Alright, I’ll leave. Sorry about that joke, Raina.”
John turned to leave, his set his eyes on the doors which Queen Veissa went through, slumped his shoulders and gave out a sigh.
Now he had to explain himself to the queen. Everything about this situation was embarrassing. He failed to get along with the person who the queen said would most welcome a human like him the most.
It scared him to think what it would be like if he met the other elves.
“W-wait,” Raina’s voice called to him.
“...What is it?”
“Say it again.”
“Say what again?”
“M-my….my name…” she eyes looked away from him as he turned to meet her face.
“Raina?”
“No. Not like that. Say it out like you did earlier, d-do it gently,” Raina squeezed her eyes, her head shook as she was unsatisfied with his performance.
“Ray-nuh.”
“Nooo, not like that! Now you are just making fun of me!”
“I am not a your pet monkey, Raina. I get that you are still mad—”
“Yes! That’s how you say it. Do it again. I want to hear it more.”
John sighed.
“Fine, Raina…”
Right as those words part his lips, he was assaulted by a large tackle into his abdomen.
“What are you doing?” the sudden force sent them both to the floor.
“Ehehehe, John, John, John. Johnny,” she hummed as she rubbed her face onto his chest, long ears twitched as she embraced his waist with soft arms.
“Hey! What is going on with you, Princess!? G-get of me! Stop this, ahhhh!”
John quickly slipped from her hug and scuttled backwards.
“What are you trying to do?”
“Me?” Raina tapped a finger to her lips, confused to why he pulled away from her. “But isn’t that how friends behave? I see other elves do it all the time…”
John took a deep breath and placed his finger tips together
“Raina, that is what lovers do to each other, I have never seen anyone cling onto people the moment they become friends. Are you really sure this is how elves are?”
“I don’t know… I don’t really have any friends… Lureena told me that is how a girl should behave around a guy friend that I really like. She said to hug them like how I hug my pillows…”
“Ahem! Raina...listen closely, that is what people who are in love do. People who get married, people who will live together, friends don’t cuddle…I think. Because that would be very very weird,” John nodded to himself.
“But I like Johnny? And you are my friend who will be living with me from today onwards. That was what mother said.”
“Yes...yes… B-but that’s not what I am doing. I am not engaged or married to you.”
“Mar-ried? What is that?”
“Weddings, couples, partners, things like that…” John averted Raina’s innocent peer at him. “D-don’t elves have them too?”
“Huh? Weddings? Oh…you mean something like a Soul Oath. W-where t-two people d-do the l-lips thing…t-then t-they...” Raina covered her heated face, unable to face John.
“Yeah… That kind of thing. Is calling me Johnny a part of that too?”
“N-no! I-I was just thinking...since you are my friend and all… I can’t call that?”
John stood to his feet and walked towards Raina who was depressed about the knowledge that she learnt from Lureena which was not only completely off, but also for a much much more intimate purpose. He extended his hand and gently hoist her to her footing.
“Johnny… John, can I ask you for something, please?”
“I guess.”
“I know hugging is for…other people…” Raina gloomed. “B-but is it okay for me to do that? I-I…” Raina lost her voice in the ensued silence. She knew it was impossible, but after the repeated simulations that she went through in her mind what she would do with this new friend of hers, at the very least she wanted…
John placed his hand on her golden hair, and stroked her head with stiff fingers.
“I have had plenty today… So, maybe some other time…”
Raina opened her mouth and formed a beautiful smile.
“And, and, maybe wake me up in the morning everyday?”
“Hahaha, where did that come from? I don’t even know where should I be staying this moment…”
The scene changed once more.
Crash!
A thundercloud boomed in the distance, the cold winds howled beyond the glass panes to Raina’s chambers. Startled the elf girl who had been laying in her bed, caused her eyes to peel open.
The door to her room swung open.
“John...”
Everything that Raina perceived about the palace with her eyes were drenched and coated by various dark shades. The usually bright and proud color schemes that emanated the elegance of the elves was now enveloped by a looming darkness
Just like her heart.
Her body moved towards the open door before she knew it, navigating left and right in the vast area of the palace through a very specific route.
One that led to his room.
She wanted to speak to him once more, to stare into those dark eyes of his while he ran his eyes all across her body, pretending to be uninterested in her looks, yet would steal glances at her whenever she was not paying attention.
The only person that she was willing to give her everything. Just one more touch from him...
No, that wasn’t it, Raina knew she wouldn’t stop there, she wanted more. she wanted to run towards him and claim him for all herself.
Initially she was satisfied with a few casual hugs whenever she could get from John. Then her heart began to crave for his presence more and more as they grew up alongside the other.
Was it because of his looks? Was it because of his character? Was it because of his will? Was it because of how he made her feel?
By the time she began to think about it, she decided that she will love him no matter what.
But now, she lost him. She failed to protect him when he needed her the most.
Raina ran and ran, kept her eyes in front of her, then suddenly came to a halt when she saw it. It was the back of the one that she had desperately wanted to see, John in the flesh.
“John! Johnny, please listen to me, t-that wasn’t me that day, I was being controlled, my mother cast some mind control magic on me. I-I couldn’t do a thing,” Raina explained herself in a desperate tone. “Please, Johnny…”
Say it out! Even if he knows it, tell him!
“I-I love you John! I don’t care if you are a demon or a human, all I know is that you are the only one for me,” she reached and wrapped her arms around him, eyes glistening.
She clung onto him with her dear life. Afraid to him, afraid of a time when she all alone in the world, surrounded by people who cared not for her but only her title.
“Please…”
For Raina, every single person she knew had only their interests at their hearts, every elf that she spoke with offered flowery words, words that meant nothing to her, words that are there for show.
Eventually she got used to it, Raina concluded that the only people that she could truly trust was John, Lureena and her mother…
Until John’s trial had happened.
Raina was trapped in her own body because of her mother’s magic.
And so she grabbed at John, trying her best to make him stay in A’vetheas. But the John that she held vanished into the air with a puff of smoke, proving it to be nothing but the figment of her own illusions.
“No… No, no, no! Nooooo! John, Johnny! Please! Please come back… I don’t want to live without you!” Raina screamed as she watched the stormy sky, where she could feel the rain droplets falling from the sky and dribble down her cheeks. Letting the pain in her chest torment her until she could no longer feel anything.
It was warm.
Raina Valindra Eridi opened her shut eyes as her consciousness returned to her with the realistic sensation of warm tears flowing down her cheeks and down to her neck.
She found herself sitting in an upright position by a white dressing drawer to her windows. The few light rays that shone onto her skin and the dry crisp air indicated that it was morning. Raina, in her frail mental state spent yet another night shut inside her room.
There was no thunderstorm or rain everything she had experienced earlier was nothing more than a dream.
John, like in her dream was no more.
He was presumed as missing, and most likely dead when one of the Elven Elite Squad members did an investigation on Alwin Zinrelle’s disappearance.
Raina’s fingers trembled as she tightened them on the black piece of cloth that she had been holding onto. It was the final memento that John had left for her, something that he had created out of thin air to keep her warm back then.
Everything happened because that she was incompetent.
His exile, the magic he used.
If only I had confessed instead of fooling around with him. In that human settlement. You accepted my Soul Oath, Johnny… Yet, where are you? ...I miss you.
She stared at the ground lifelessly, snuggled the black cloth and visualized the inanimate object itself to be its creator.
The sacred black cloth had accompanied her every second while she was holed up in her room, she would not allow it to leave her side for a second.
It was the only thing that kept her sanity in place.