***** Online... Fuck yeah...

My character stands with a red-orange puff jacket that leaves my arms bare, long jean shorts that cut off mid-shin, white socks, blue low tops, and a white shirt. Sleeveless hoodie? Oh, it’s a hooded zipper vest? Why?

I click through my closet trying to find today’s outfit. I’ve got a stealth mission that turns into a shoot out. I need to look basic to blend, and be armored enough to survive a few shots before I disappear into the crowds again. So... White shirt, jean shorts, flat shoes, i.e. my underwear, needs to be replaced. We’re looking for solid colors, no text or logos, nothing flashy, but too plain is also a big warning flag. No one dresses plain.

Black long shorts with broad white trim? What are the stats? Only +2 AGI? Ah, they’re khaki. Ew, light khaki. Are these starter clothes? What the fuck?

“Hmm...” I keep scrolling through my closet.

I’d like to wear layers, something big and noticeable that I can use as the main descriptor that I can stash pretty quickly. Maybe something reversible? Red and white are both bold colors, super noticeable, and, if I flip it or had a detachable liner... Do I have a lined, reversible hoodie or jacket? I know stats are more important, but I like dressing up my character, so...

I’m not going to complain that the equipment stats are random, but I know that there are different areas where I can try to farm that stat I’m looking for. I should probably go do that until I get the right combo to try the mission. Might get some better attributes. Agility would be nice for the run, but I need Defense. Piercing if I can find it, Projectile Resistance would be better, but I’ll take what I can get. Not some single bar, single digit noob shit.

So am I going gambling, pickpocketing, shopping? I could try to get some Affiliation Reputation and get some branded gear. Too bad I can’t decide what emblem I can wear. Well, technically if I find the right group with an emblem I’m willing to do the work to join I can have a graphic and some protection, but I really don’t care that much about finding all the lore and then playing that far into the game. Stealth I can do. Hanging out I can do. Mini-games for loot? Fine. Research to find out what group shows up at what zones at what times and their beliefs?

Do I have any decent pants? I could go farming, but what’s the point if I get duplicates? Better for me to see what I’ve got.

My alarm goes off and I realize that I’ve spent the better part of two hours just playing dress-up. I’m chill, I’m not stressed, I was clearly entertained, so time well spent.

I never understood the whole my relaxation time is frustrating, expensive, and stressful crowd. I don’t wanna have to make a spreadsheet to enjoy myself. I’m not a min-maxer, I don’t like crafting, with ***** I can just hang out in a zone, talk to people, dance, listen to music, play cards or rock-paper-scissors, and I get shit.

I’m not constantly fearing for my life, I don’t have to be a murder-hobo to advance. I don’t have to be a geneticist or biologist, there’s no real time, time locked bullshit other than the crowds that you’ll find in different locations, but that’s easily observable, and it’s not like you’re not gonna find people anywhere. I want a cool school uniform? I can head to a university or something. Don’t even need to enroll or anything. I can be a total creeper and hang out at the gates, trade some kid some cool shoes for their uniform, bada-bing bada-boom.

And the clothes have different stats. It’s not “this item has this stat regardless of where you got it”. You get a jacket from the same guy three days in a row? Unless you’ve got insane luck, each of those jackets will be different, ‘cause each of the jackets is different! Love this game. Hell, I don’t even have to talk to the same dude once a day. If I wanted to I could talk to everyone and try to get the uniform of every student there. And some of their shit is tailored.

Don’t have to fight to earn money to buy land to buy seeds, to learn to farm, to worry about grow times in real life, to you lost everything because your crops rotted, to now you need tools for harvesting, farming, and processing your crops. You want gear? You know how to make textiles from your shit? And fuck games where you have to earn money to buy books instead of just fumbling and getting better with practice.

Give me two hours and a full closet any day. I’m golden.

Cheese and salsa nuked in the microwave to make a quick dip. Gots some chips. Nachos. Would be better with guacamole, but avocados are getting expensive and I’m good. Although I could probably get a salad for lunch tomorrow. There’s that apple walnut thing with the onion dressing that was pretty bomb. Ooh! That or those crunchy garlic bread rounds with the hard salami and cheese.

Fancy cheese and crackers... Mmm...

I pop a cap off of a beer masquerading as a root beer, enjoying my tasty big kid pop as I head to make sure that I’ve actually got clothes to wear to work tomorrow IRL. I strip down as I wander around my apartment, a not so shitty hole, and stare out the window at the surrounding woods and the nearby lake. Not sure why this place is so cheap, but it works for me. I chug down my not-pop then go grab a fudge covered ice cream popsicle. Dessert.

I have no idea how long I’ve been wandering around just eating ice cream and drinking, but I’m ready for a shower and bed. Then it’s back to the grind.

Scrubby, tooth brushy, water drinky, beddy-bye.

I wake up standing in not my living room. There’s a round glass-top table, and that’s it. Most of one wall is brightly lit with thick vertical blinds, flimsy matte plastic, and looking out isn’t making me any happier. There’s a balcony that looks like a large deck someone built onto their house, along with thickly padded chairs that probably recline. Outdoor furniture made to look like indoor furniture. Truly, the deck is epic, and looks like it’s an outdoor meeting spot for me and the apartments to either side of me. Looking out there are more balconies linking multiple apartments, which is all well and good, except for that’s all I can see. Just apartment buildings and balconies. No parking lot, just buildings. There’s a sky above, I’m on one of the top three levels, but there are clouds below, which means I’m really, really high up.

Nope.

I back away, and do a quick spin. There’s a country bar with a kitchen through the “window”, a door with a bolt and locking knob, and what looks like a chain lock, but the chain is missing. I try to peek out the spy hole, but there isn’t one. Without a chain, cracking the door is a lot more iffy. I throw the bolt, turn the handle lock, then set out to explore the rest of the apartment.

A case of content theft: this narrative is not rightfully on Amazon; if you spot it, report the violation.

There’s one small room filled with random furniture. Looks like I moved in and dumped everything here until I could organize the space. It has a door inside that faces the side with what I’m assuming is the front door, but what I’m guessing is a closet is blocked by the random items in the room. I’ll come back to this room later.

Back into the main living room, there’s a note on the table and the blinds are open. Fuck! Did I not lock the patio doors? I never opened them. Shit, the front door was unlocked, too. I close the sliding door and the blinds, but there is no lock on the patio doors. I’m not gonna try to read a note after I know there’s someone in this weird place with me. I turn to the kitchen and there’s some random white chick with long light brown hair that she probably calls blonde smiling at me while messing with something out of sight.

I don’t know where I am, she’s way too comfortable, so I just casually move back to the crowded room, closing the door behind me. This door without a lock. Shit.

I slide a chair that looks like it goes on the patio in front of the door, rolling it over other things and then bracing against it. I don’t know if she has a gun, actual firearm or nailgun or anything, but I don’t want to be directly against the door. I sit on the other side of the chair, holding it in place, then pull the note out of my pocket. I’m wearing dark blue denim pants, a black windbreaker jacket, a white sure with some black lettering on it, and black sneakers with no socks. None of these clothes are anything I own. What the actual fuck?

Hey, neighbor!

Saw that the room was occupied, the unoccupied apartments have the blinds opened all the way, and thought I’d come over and help you out a bit.

We’re not sure what all is going on, but none of us lived here before. It’s all apartments as far as we can tell, unless you take the stairwell to a ground floor, which can be up or down. Try figuring that out. There’s some looters who just go around taking what they can back to their places, there aren’t any bandits or raiders, killing makes bad things happen for everyone, and no one wants that, but most of the time we just kinda explore and try to figure out what’s going on.

Things to avoid:

Spiders –

* these things are like baseball sized with human faces. Not a good time.

* Kill them if you see one or two, but run if you see more. They swarm.

People with sunglasses –

* if you ask them to take them off and they don’t, don’t let them in. They can’t come in without permission, and, with the balcony situation, some of them don’t just stop at one apartment. We think these guys are what happens if someone’s murdered by another tenant.

* If they do take off their glasses, and their eyes don’t look right, don’t keep staring. Bad things will happen to you and you might turn into one of them

Other than that, explore empty apartments, they usually don’t have locked doors, and try to find the ground floor. Once outside you can get a different place that’s less horrifying, and a job so you can trade and barter stuff.

I’m gonna leave this note so you know who I am.

I’m Candace, I have long, blond hair that I usually just wear down, blue or green eyes if I’ve got the contacts, brown if I don’t, and I’m not going to hurt you.

Stay safe and see you around!

I don’t know if she’s an idiot or just singularly helpfully unhelpful. Spider thing? Good to know. As is the mindfuckery of the stairwell. Even the douches with sunglasses. The “I’m random blonde chick, hope you recognize me”? Not so helpful. But I did see her. Doesn’t mean I trust her. Pretty sure I forgot to not mix nachos, “wine”, and “beer” again.

What a fucked up dream.

I put the note away in my pocket, check to make sure the chair is secure, and then notice there’s a chain on the door. It’s not much, but it’s something, so I put the chain lock in then get ready to explore the room.

There are toys, cheap dollar store party packs, closed and opened, and what look like gumball machine prizes. There’s a very cheap hollow aluminum baseball bat, a sleeping bag, a tent in it’s pack, and a stadium chair with one cup holder. There’s so much random junk I’m not sure what to make of it, but there’s also a piece of clothing here and there.

The most disturbing find isn’t the random arrow I find. It’s synthetic and looks modern as fuck. Neither is the bizarre pulley system I think might be a bow, which I’m going to assume means it’s a really fucking awesome bow. No. I find a random can of “meat” soup.

It looks like chicken noodle soup, but the label just says “meat soup” from Can instead of an actual company, and no nutritional information on the back. Just two sides of “meat soup”. I give it a quick shake and liquid sloshes, so I don’t think it’s a prop, but this coupled with the outside view just hits hard. The locks, placements and lack thereof, are a security, “I’m in danger” level red flag. This shit? I’m really hoping this is just a weird dream.

I move the chair and peek out, Candace waving her fingers at me while heading out holding a sandwich in her other hand, and I wonder if this is supposed to be my apartment and this random bitch just robbed me. Or is she taking it as payment for the note? Dunno, but I do know I need to do a better job of hiding the good shit.

She leaves, opening the blinds but not shoving them all the way over, and closes the door behind her, and I’m quick as shit to hop out and close the blinds back. I double check to make sure that I can’t lock the sliding glass door, but suddenly I can, so I do. I’m not safe, I get that, but I do feel slightly better.

I panic as I note that it’s getting darker. It’s not night yet, but it looks like it will be soon. I try to switch on the overhead light, just a bare bulb, no ceiling fan or cover, and the light switches by the front door do nothing. I go into the storage room and the light doesn’t work, but I do manage to spy a flashlight. Which doesn’t turn on. But there’s a pack of batteries I waste no time tearing open before loading up the flashlight, which, thankfully, does turn on.

Okay, whatever.

Front door, is unlocked. Bitch! I throw the locks again after a quick peek into a stairwell that looks like it descended from a parking garage, way too long with fence like rails lining a massive pit, my heart hammering in my chest at the sight.

“What the fuck?”

Dream! It’s a really fucked up dream. Keep moving, me!

I head to the kitchen and there’s no fridge, no oven, no microwave, a sink with no faucet or handles or sprayer, just cabinets. A quick check through the cabinets show there are random food items. More cans, a loaf of bread, a jar of peanut butter, a butter knife, a spoon, and a bottle of water.

I grab everything, pile it on the floor, then take the haul to my safe spot before racing to what looks like it should be a full bathroom with tub, toilet and sink, but there’s only a toilet and sink, and space for a tub. There’s a door here, a closet hidden by the bathroom door, and it’s empty except for a pack of batteries. I grab those, and then head to what might be a linen closet.

There are hookups for a washer and dryer, which is nice, but that’s it minus a whisk. I grab the whisk, because I don’t know, and then sprint to the last door.

A master bedroom. With an air mattress and a cheap looking flat sheet and ratty looking pillow. I don’t want to take the pillow cover off, but I’m also not sleeping in this room. I go to open the closet, see what looks like a utility room with a large panel in the lower left, nope the fuck out, and race back to my safe room. I throw the chain, remember the closet, and block it off to the best of my ability. It’s getting very dark, and I don’t know what’s going to happen, but when I ran past the front door it was cracked open. I locked it. I know I did. I keep locking it and it keeps coming open somehow. I don’t know if I’m in any real danger, but I definitely don’t feel safe. I’ll just hide in here until the sun comes up again.