Fuck off Jerry.

Words I have wanted to say every day for the last five and a half years since I had started working in this shit hole. Words that despite wanting to say them so badly it gave me a sharp stinging pain in the back of my head when I swallowed down.

As I always have done.

“Have that project on my desk by 9am sharp fuckwit,” Jerry said, he was wearing his perfectly fitted suit as if he had barely broken a sweat today, his beach blonde hair flicked back, he looked down on me with judging blue eyes and a chiselled jawline that made me want to punch him in the throat. What made things worse was that Jerry was infuriatingly self-aware of how he looked.

He was like a male model pulled straight from a magazine, he had it all, looks, money and a gorgeous model girlfriend. Did he deserve it? Hell no, did that stop him from rubbing it in my face every opportunity that he got, no again.

Fuck off Jerry.

Why couldn’t I just say those words, summon the confidence, the courage to tell him to go fuck himself and follow up with a punch to the face. He didn’t know me, he didn’t know the things I have been through, he had no idea about any aspect of my life. He didn’t care, all he was bothered about was getting all the glory for the work I was doing.

Unfortunately, this wasn’t a movie though and instead of acting out on my thoughts I simply offered Jerry a tired smile before taking hold of the file that he slid across my already cluttered desk. Pieces of paper littered the table top in front of my three computer screens which had so many programs, from spreadsheets to charts open that it would send anyone into sensory overload. But for me it was calming, it was where for some reason I found piece. I was good at analysing data, no I was great at analysing data. Something that to my detriment, Jerry had figured out about two years ago.

“No problem,” I said as politely as I can, paired with a feigned smile, despite the hatred that doused me to my core like a Molotov cocktail.

“Don’t let me down, Barry wants me ready to present this thing first thing. I’ve got a meal at Liveseys tonight and I am not missing that for any fucker.” Jerry laughed to himself, after all why would he change his plans when he had his go to. He was standing cocksure in front of my desk, his hands tucked into his pockets.

Jerry was King in this office and he knew it, everything about him was coated in a layer of arrogance that only a sociopath could emit. He did not care about anyone but himself and he certainly didn’t care who he stood on to get to where he wanted.

Jerry got his promotion to senior manager not because of what he knew, but because of who he knew, he had a way of leveraging people and situations to his own benefit.

How someone with the personality of dishcloth with not one redeemable feature got to where he is now is beyond me, why is it that the dicks of this world get all the power where as those that have good values and try to do the right thing always end up with the scraps.

Somehow Jerry knew what to say and when to say it, the smarmy ass would promise the world then get others to do all the work while basking in all the glory that came with meeting tight deadlines.

A high-pitched ringing started in my right ear and I felt myself zoning out as Jerry’s words became nothing more than muffled noise, my heart was beating hard and fast, I swear I could hear it pumping. I often zoned out in these situations, I had learned to tune into the words that I needed to, it was the only way I could cope, the only way I could suppress my frustration.

“Silas!” Jerry shouted with a firmness in his voice jolted me from my thoughts. How I would love to punch him in his smug, perfectly square jaw.

“Sorry,” I said, racking my brain to think about what he had just said as he came into focus once more.

“You did book my table at Liveseys, didn’t you?” he placed both his hands on my desk and leant over me so far that I could feel myself shrinking into the shadow that he cast.

With a slight tremble in my voice I said, “I did, I booked your table for half seven like you asked.” I didn’t make eye contact with him, but I could feel a deep stare coming from his bright blue eyes, the intensity of his look threatening to burn right through me. Of course I booked it, not only was I a data analyst, I was his personal secretary too, unofficially anyway. I didn’t get paid any extra, I didn’t get any perks for doing everything that he said, I had lost count of how many promotions I had been overlooked on, to the point where I had stopped putting myself forward. All because I didn’t have the backbone to say no.

Fuck off Jerry.

“Fuck Silas I said to book it for seven,” he said with a patronising tone, I knew where he was heading, he was just looking for a way to bait me. Do whatever he wanted, to make himself feel better, flex that control. I’d always thought that maybe he was overcompensating for a tiny dick because someone could not be this much of an ass hole all the time for no reason.

“Sorry Jerry,” I said, “I thought you asked for half past, I must have misheard you.” I apologised despite knowing full well that he asked me book the table by the window, at half seven.

His face remained a picture of calmness as he continued to lean over me before he swept his arm across my desk, knocking over my desk tidy, and spilling my half cup of coffee over the paper I had layered out in front of me with all my notes on. It drenched all of the papers that I had been working on before spilling off the edge of a desk onto my dark blue chino’s, luckily for me I drank my coffee when it was cooler so it didn’t burn my legs.

Reading on this site? This novel is published elsewhere. Support the author by seeking out the original.

Not only did I have Jerry’s report to put together by morning, I now needed to redo all of my notes.

A tide of frustration began to well in my stomach and for a split second I imagined what it was like to drag Jerry over the desk and hammer my clenched fists into his face over and over until there was nothing more left than a bloody pulp.

Instead I replied, “I’ll ring them while you are on the way and see if they can bring the reservation forward.” I said, choosing to swallow down the hatred once again with a little bit more of my pride for good measure.

“Good,” Jerry had a wild grin, I had no idea why he liked messing with me like this, but it was how it had always been since I had started working here. He raised his hand towards me and slapped my cheek playfully. “Don’t let me down again Silas, or your out on your ass.” He finished before snorting to himself and heading towards the elevator.

“Fuck off Jerry” I muttered under my breath, panicking when he stopped in his tracks for a second and my fear spiked that he has heard me. Jerry adjusted his cuff-links before carrying in to the far side of the office and calling for the elevator.

Maybe one day I will have the balls to actually say that to his face.

I let out a sigh and rubbed my hands over my tired face, I had already been working since six this morning, I looked up at the little white clock that sat on the wall above my desk and shake my head. It was six fifteen and with all this extra work would mean I would likely be here until late.

Reaching into my pocket I took out my phone and stared at the screensaver, it was a picture of me, my mum and dad when I was kid, when life was so much easier. Opening it up I made a call and waited for them to answer.

“Hello,”

“Hi mum,” I said with a fake amount of energy in my voice.

“Silas, I was just talking about you to Florence next door, she was asking about you.” My mum sounded happy, like she had had a good day, well at least one of us had.

“Hope it was all good things,” I laughed.

“Why wouldn’t it be, I was telling her all about you being a high flying data analysts for Danatyne. Now when are you going to be here, I have dinner on, so make sure you are not too late ok.” Her voice was soft and reassuring, even though I was mid twenties it was amazing the comfort that speaking to her brought me.

“About that,” I was hesitant, I hated letting her down, more than anything. “Things are little crazy in the office today so I am going to be late calling over.”

“Oh, ok,” she said, “Is everything ok?” I could hear the disappointment in her voice, that excitement in her tone fading and I hated myself for it.

“Everything is fine,” I lied as I started to rub the bridge of my nose. “It’s just we have a really tight deadline and there are a group of us staying later to make sure we hit it.” I said as I looked up at the empty office around me. “I don’t want to let the others down and be the only one that leaves early, I hope you understand.”

“I do Silas,” Mum said, “I understand, just make sure you all get some rest, are you still calling over.”

I looked up at the clock, the ticking seemingly getting more noticeable. “I will try but it is probably going to be a late one. Maybe it would be best if we just rearranged for tomorrow.”

“Last time you said that it was another two weeks before I saw you,” She said, her voice becoming more sceptical. “I just miss my boy,”

“I promise I will see you soon. Look I need to go now as the rest of the team are waiting on me. Love you.”

“I love you more,” Mum said before I hung up the phone.

Letting out a sigh I tossed my phone onto a dry part of the table before cradling my face in my hands, I just wanted to scream. Instead I set about tidying my desk and lifted the soggy, coffee soaked sheets from my desk, walking over to the radiator and resting them on top. My thinking was if I had any luck they would dry out and I’ll be able to still use them. Then I tutted loudly when I realised that I never had such luck and would likely need to redo, all of my days work as well as Jerry’s.

*****

A couple of hours later and my desk was tidy and I was busy typing away on my computer, pulling the data together that Jerry had asked for and started formulating a presentation complete with charts and analytics. My eyes were growing heavy and I could see that my concentration was waning as my vision focusing in and out on my screen as all the information started to blur together.

I reached for my mug and raised it to take a sip of coffee when I realised it was empty.

“Well I am going to need more of that,” I said to myself before standing form my chair and heading to the kitchenette to make myself a fresh cup.

While I was waiting for the kettle to boil I found my mind drifting elsewhere, anywhere but here, anything to distract me. More than anything I needed a holiday, I needed to get away from this place, if only I could have afforded one.

I allowed myself to drift off, imagining a Caribbean beach, golden sands, turquoise blue waters, the noise of the sea, the warmth of the sun against my skin and I so desperately wished to be there. I was miserable.

A strange noise caused me to leave the holiday in my mind with a bump. It was a noise similar to when you are tuning a radio, a high pitched frequency that seemed to only be getting stronger.

Confused I raised my finger to my ear and used it as a plunger, like that would help, I figured I must have had a migraine coming on. For a moment the high pitch noise stopped and I focussed on the sound of the bubbling water in the kettle.

In a split moment I felt as though the ground underneath my feet vibrated and I stretched my arms out to keep my balance.

“Woah!” Feeling dizzy I turned on the sink and splashed my face with some water as the noise returned. This time it was more painful and forced me to wince, clasping my hands to my ears proved pointless as the ringing continued. It’s pitch intensifying. It caused a wave of nausea so I took a step back to sit at a nearby chair just as the ground shook again, except this time there was a stronger force as the circular coffee table nearby fell over.

“Okay I didn’t imagine that then,” I said to myself, I was the only one left in the office as far as I knew and a panic came over me, was it an earthquake? That wouldn’t explain the high pitch noise that was continuing to get worse. My head was pounding, feeling as though it was about to split in two, a pressure forming at the centre of my forehead similar to when you swim too deep in the swimming pool.

It was at that moment that I feel a tug in my stomach as if I had been lassoed by a rope, tension wrapped around my waist, squeezing me tightly. It near snapped me in half as I was yanked forward by an invisible force so hard it snapped by head back with a crack and I swear I saw stars and a flash of white.

I let out a scream of panic as the rest of the office started hurtling past me so fast the only thing I could liken it to was if I was on the main deck of a spaceship flying at warp speed looking out at the stars. Colours merged into blurred lines and the nauseating feeling intensified in the out of my stomach as everything flew past me so quickly that I had no clue where abouts in the office I was anymore.

When I lost the sensation of feeling grounded, I lost my shit and really started to panic, how would the floor disappear? Suddenly it was like I was falling into nothing and I spiralled helplessly, all the while screaming loudly until with a thump I slammed into the ground and the world stopped spinning around me.