Sepul understood Harlan well enough to know something was wrong, and judging by his character, and what he already said and did that night, he believed to know where he was.
“Hirum, I think I can stop this all from blowing up.”
He gave him an exception to the spells which locked the room down and Sepul teleported instantly.
Harlan was seizing on the floor of his room.
He had been remote controlling the golem on stage from his room through a spell he got from Xol’s blackbook.
The shock of dying so suddenly before he could sever the connection had a backlash that risked killing him. His mind was confused about whether or not he was dead.
Sepul could at least prevent his body from being in more pain, hopefully giving him the focus needed to fight for his life.
After another minute, he looked little worse for wear, though his clothes were soaked in sweat.
“Harlan, are you awake? Can you hear me.”
He let out a deep breath and his heart calmed.
“Don’t move me, not yet, I have… a plan.”
Nobody could believe it when the headless corpse stood up, and walked to the man who had killed him.
He drew sigils in the air with void, forcing all in attendance to shut their eyes.
They heard screaming and once they no longer felt the pressure demanding them to look away, they opened them to find the man was gone, just bloody clothes remained, and Harlan looked as if nothing had happened so long as one ignored the blood that soaked into his clothes.
“Hirum, you can remove the restraints now. I’m leaving.”
He walked out, bringing his friends and family to his room.
The real Harlan was sitting on his couch already, covered in sweat and half undressed as Sepul kept a close eye on him.
Once they were there Adina gripped him so tightly that his skin began to tear.
“How?”
“I was controlling that body, it was supposed to be part of the show.”
“Is this real? Are you really here?”
Harlan suited up.
“None of the fakes have golem armor, the cost of such a thing would be nothing short of insanity. The one on stage used body morphing and illusions to make it seem like it was wearing one.”
“This is just, you can’t do that to me. I thought you were dead, again, I can’t take that.”
It wasn’t a shock that everyone was still terrified and on the verge of tears.
“I had a vision. I couldn’t tell you, they needed to see me die and everyone needed to react like it was real.”
“It isn’t fair to me, I can’t…”
He embraced Adina, barely calming her.
Then he showed her memories and thoughts, things that she could use to confirm if it was really him.
A soulsearch from up close would reveal that their souls were normal, whereas his own was nearly unrecognizable as human.
From the ranged version of the spell, all souls appeared more or less the same, and Harlan had his own spells that would cloak himself from those, not that he thought people were marking down what his soul looked like anyway, but it was a precaution that he took anyway.
He had Sepul gate them to his home, some didn’t come along, they needed to get back to their own people now that they knew Harlan was alright.
After an hour he thought everyone was calm enough that he could speak to them.
In that hour, Harlan sorted some of his thoughts, and he didn’t like what he was seeing.
“Everyone, I think that I should be honest about why I refuse to join the civil war that is brewing. I can’t get involved from the start. I am not going to be able to resist changing things if I have the chance.”
“You love change, you want it, so take it.”
Blackstone had recovered faster than most, from the shock.
“No, my changes, no matter what I want from them, can only be implemented with a mountain of bodies.
I know that I can do it, which is why I know that I can’t let myself do it. If I get pushed, I’ll push back, but heavy is the head that holds the crown, and I don’t want that weight.”
She scoffed.
“Cowardice doesn’t suit you.”
“I know, I’m done, I’m tired, the politics, the fighting. I’m fucking 15, I shouldn’t have all of this weighing down on me. I’ve been robbed of my childhood already, I don’t want to live the rest of my life like this.
Do you know what I saw when I was on stage? All of those people, students, parents, just, people.
I saw how fragile they were. The fear in their eyes as they realized they might’ve just stepped into a deathtrap. Fathers and mothers reached for their weapons, those who couldn’t fight tried to shield their younger siblings with their bodies. I’m done pretending that I’ve grown up.”
Tears began to well up in his eyes.
“I saw what I could be. I saw all of those people who wronged me, afraid for their lives, knowing that I could’ve snuffed them out in an instant. I had my moment, and I can’t do it. I can’t be the man who does these things.”
For the first time in a very, very long time, Harlan looked small, his eyes were not filled with fire.
He was young, and everyone forgot that. He had put up the veneer of a grown and hardened man, but seeing that man looking back at him, he flinched.
“If you need to carry that weight, I could always lend you a shoulder. I shouldn’t force that on you. I think it is best for us to return home now.”
“I’ll call Sepul, I… I think I want to rest.”
Harlan had been laying in bed for hours already, yet no sleep would come to relieve his mind.
A knock on the door, he didn’t reply.
Adina crawled into bed with him.
“What are you doing?”
Stolen from Royal Road, this story should be reported if encountered on Amazon.
“Sometimes it is best to just have somebody next to you. I remember how you used to hold my hand when I couldn’t sleep. And It isn’t wrong that you stopped yourself from being what they think of you.”
“What if it backfires? What if they think I’m weak? What if they hurt one of you.”
She kissed him.
“Do you want to be a monster? You keep forcing yourself, justifying things. If you were really evil, you wouldn’t bother. It is good that it is eating away at you, it means you are better than you think.”
He had some idea where this was leading, so he backed off.
“What’s wrong?”
“We are both hurting. I know you don’t care about that part of our relationship, and-”
Adina thought of how it might’ve looked to him and felt embarrassed.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t- I think I should go.”
“No, stay, I can tell you were shivering, I felt what death was like, but you had to see me die, you shouldn’t be alone right now, and I don’t want to be alone either. I just, I don’t want us to do something we will regret.”
They slept back to back, sharing their warmth, but under different blankets.
Harlan got no sleep, he buried his head in his hands and pushed away those thoughts of his.
“Good choice.”
“Was it? I mean, she is probably thinking that… I mean, was that what she was trying to do? Did I read everything wrong?”
“You are both too young. If you are worried that she is going to think that you think she is some kind of pervert, then just talk to her. You do remember that is an option right?”
Harlan took a deep breath to clear his thoughts.
“Right.”
“You both have something wonderful together, you are open, you trust one another, and you try to clear up your misunderstandings. You both want to avoid the physical part that comes with this, because it makes you uncomfortable, so just do that, keep avoiding it. Ask your parents, how often do they still-”
“No, stop, I get it, I understand what you are telling me.”
Dawn laughed.
“There, I lightened the mood. I’m in your head, and I want the best for you, don’t fall into despair, the world isn’t worth your soul and you aren’t abandoning it just because you won’t wrest control of it from everyone else. You see a bandit, and you can’t see him as anything but a monster. You stopped yourself earlier because you saw those people, not as nobles who would see you dead, or who might treat their subjects poorly, but as parents and children. So please, get some sleep.”
Harlan dreamt of himself , there were no bodies piled into the sky, no fire that reached the horizon, no monster that reached above the trees and stared into his soul.
Adina was there, but she was older, he was too, and they could stare into each other's eyes, her beautiful green eyes.
Spring daisies dotted the rolling hills and he touched her stomach, feeling life inside of it.
Harlan awoke feeling refreshed.
It was an ephemeral sensation, one he didn’t really understand, but he felt like this might’ve been his first real dream, perhaps every night before this had been nothing but visions of terrible futures and him being inside of his head.
He looked at his couch as he awoke, finding a man made of shadows sitting there.
“Coronach?”
“I heard you wanted to know my story, so I’ll make it quick. I was once in the running to be the champion of light. I gave that up to save my people, and they betrayed me. After all that I had done for them, they could not stand for themselves. They watched me be beaten and dragged through the street by knights, drained of mana after a long and drawn out fight. If they had helped, perhaps we could’ve won. So, she took me in, and I tried to be her champion, but I failed her tests. She just kept me around as her guard dog. Any questions?”
“Were you always… like that?”
“Physically? This is something I developed while working under her. Mentally, well. She wants something from her champion. They must be smart, righteous, and passionate, and willing to put their sense of right and wrong above what others call just. But I find that simply isn’t something sustainable. I was a master of my magic, if the term existed at the time, I would’ve been an archmage.
A smart, righteous, and passionate man, could only come to my same conclusion, humanity hates heroes, and loves martyrs, so they deserve to burn in hellfire of their own making. You will lose what you love, see humanity for what it is. And be like me.”
“That sounds vaguely like a threat.”
“For a man to prove the world is evil by themselves committing evil acts, would be the height of foolishness. I believe what I’ve said is a self-evident truth, there is simply no need to force it.”
Adina began to stir from her slumber.
“It is my time to leave. There are no heroes left in man. You will live to see them raise statues of the dead while they could’ve changed their fate. They will lay in despair because they refuse to stand for a better world.”
Adina got up from the bed and went to get dressed, yet as soon as one strap was loosed she realized where she was.
“Do you want me to get you something from your cabin?”
“Yes, please. Something in a happy color, yellow or white.”
Harlan returned shortly, though the others gave him side eye for bringing Adina’s clothes to his room, they said nothing.
----------------------------------------
The king felt weaker every day now, the curse would give him years still, but its effects would become more prominent the closer he got to that fated day.
Yggdra sat with his children, today was important after the shitshow of the night before.
“None of you will act against Archmage Changeling.”
Alder raised his hand and was given permission to speak.
“I have believed in the past that his risk was outweighed by his benefit, after that display last night, I wonder. Clearly he had planned to do something else. If he is weighing his own options about his loyalty towards you, and ends up siding with the noble faction, we could be wiped out and replaced by a new royal family.”
He pointed to Rosewell, who clearly had a rebuttal.
“Speak.”
“I believe you are misunderstanding Harlan’s change of plans. He hesitated with his speech at the end and declared himself neutral because he doesn’t want to fight, not because he is unsure who he wants to fight. Esparella has told me this.”
“And we should believe your pet-”
Rosewell threw an empty class at her brother which he narrowly dodged.
“Perhaps his own fire has rubbed off on me, but I will not suffer anymore of your insults towards my daughter.”
“She is a street urchin brought into our home.”
Rosewell was about to get up from her seat when their father slammed his hand on the table.
“Alder, apologize.”
“What?”
He received a glare.
“Esparella has been useful both as a subject for research and as an asset to the kingdom. Her words have weight in this room when in regards to this subject due to her connection with Archmage Changeling.
If she says that he was conflicted on fighting at all, and that he lost his edge last night, then I will consider it the truth of the matter until further notice.”
“My apologies, dear sister, I have spoken out of line.”
“I will accept this apology.”
Rue raised her hand to speak.
“It isn’t like Woodruff and Malva to miss meetings like this.”
“Your brothers are dead, they have long held plans to make it seem as if others were attacking Changeling and then swoop in to save him and his for favor. These plans could be tolerated when they were hypotheticals. But they had been building forces for such an attack and I cannot risk that they would do such a thing as it stands. Violet was behind the recent attack, and it can never get out that she was.
Duke Seaborn was a fool to be used by her and will be dealt with in time. She has also been dealt with.”
Suddenly the room became tense, their father tightened his grip over them more and more in regards to Harlan, now to kill their siblings for him? It suddenly felt like anyone who couldn’t bring the boy to their side was no longer in running for the highest seat of power.
Gladio decided that enough was enough.
“I formally resign my claim to the throne. The nearer it becomes, the more I see that I lack what it takes to hold that throne. I cannot bring harm to my siblings, and the idea that one day I might need to go against my own children bores holes through my resolve.”
Verbena and Anemone joined him.
“I agree with our brother, though I would harm my siblings should it be forced as the only option, I have no children with which to grant a claim to and I have no desire to have them myself.”
“I withdraw because I do not wish to be a victim of my other siblings. And I request that I be granted a husband, count or duke, with which I can live away from this madness.”
“Then you should all leave this room, and not return for these meetings. Rosewell?”
“I do not believe myself fit to be queen.”
A handful of her siblings hide their smiles.
“But considering the rest who are in running still, I cannot let this kingdom fall into their hands. I maintain my position and hope that Harlan will be to me what Sepul is to you. A man whose ruthlessness might know no bounds and whose loyalty is to the betterment of this land which we live in, and not just who sits on a nice chair. If I am deficient as queen, he is certain to cover these faults, temper my softness, and carry out my will as a neutral party.”
“Then we shall resume talks when those who have left leave.”