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William Theodore Cooper was a thirty-year-old financial advisor in a multinational bank. He had a beautiful fiancée and was days from the big M-day. He didn’t think he was too handsome but his girl was a nine only because he thought calling her a ten would be bragging too much.
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That fateful day, he decided to go eat at a Chinese restaurant a couple blocks on the other side of the Broadway. He usually ate at the same place but he felt he deserved an adventure.
William was slowly savoring his bowl of chow mien like everyone else (it was the dish-of-the-day) when his phone rang. “Dahlia”, it showed in the caller ID. With a big grin, he answered it.
“Hello, may I talk with Mr. Stonks?” Dahlia’s silly question was followed by wind chime giggles and a rather cute and brief snort. William had to force his poker face to avoid cracking in the middle of the crowded restaurant. He barely succeeded.
“Yes, you may,” he answered with the same grin as before.
“Buh-huh, no fun. You should answer with ‘This is Mr. Stonks, straight from wall street’,” she pouted.
“People are staring at me already because my phone rang like I’m some sort of alien,” he whispered. “I think our kids will ask us why we call the glass data-panels ‘phones’.”
“Oh, sorry for calling you out of the blue, Mr. Stonks!” She chirped unapologetically. “I thought you loved hearing my voice.”
“I do.”
“Say that to the preacher in a few days,” She quipped and giggled again. “And will whisper sweet nothings in your ear forever.”
“I will,” he babbled while trying to not float away from the chair. “I’m guessing you have good news?”
“Good? GOOD? No, I don’t have good news. I have WONDERFUL news!”
He giggled with her this time. “Do tell, please.”
“I’m at the seamstress right now. Can you guess what I’m wearing?”
“A Brazilian bikini,” he jested in a low voice. People were still staring at them instead of their chow mien bowls.
She laughed again. “You wish. No, it has way more fabric than that and it’s white. But I might get one if you deserve it.”
“It’s done then? One less thing to worry about, thank goodness!” He exulted.
“Yes, and it is purr-fect!” She squealed. “I’m so excited Will!”
“I’m too. I can’t wait to see you wearing it.”
“Tut-tut, you gotta wait. Just a few more days, be patient. Are you still having lunch? Aren’t you supposed to be in the office?”
“My vacation starts tomorrow. I have nothing to do there except wait to clock out.”
“Oh, finally,” she sighed theatrically. “I can’t believe you worked for three years straight without taking a single day off.”
“Hey, it paid out!” He protested. “We get to spend six months on our honeymoon! With a hefty bonus from the boss.”
“Good! I’ll make sure to thank him personally! Now, I must go. The dress won’t be perfect unless I have sho-oes!” She sang along.
“’Kay! Love you.”
“Love you too, now go and get me moar stonks!” She made smooching sounds and hung up.
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Catherine Wallenstein was a rich and popular high school senior, one plagued by a spendtrhift and alcoholic mother and the unwanted attention of a male classmate. That asshole, whose name shall never tarnish this narrative, irreparably hurt her at the worst possible moment and me by proxy. That’s how Catherine found herself in an appointment with Dr. Esther Hill, an obstetrician.
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“Yes,” the doctor said sympathetically, attempting to sound positive but not overly so. The girl in front of her was obviously grieving and she wanted to let her make a decision she would not regret. “You’re thirteen weeks pregnant, Cathy.”
The frail teenager sniffled and lowered her head as far down as it would go as she hugged her knees on the chair across the physician’s desk. She was trembling and soon started to sob.
“Take your time,” Esther whispered. “I have the whole afternoon only for you.”
Esther waited while Catherine wept. The older woman grieved that Catherine wasn’t the first and certainly wouldn’t be the last one passing through that in her office. She hadn’t asked about the father but from Catherine’s reaction, she knew she wouldn’t. It was obvious that the girl didn’t want to speak about it, the reason why as obvious as the color of the sky.
The physician quietly took a paper tissue and dabbed the corners of her eyes before the girl noticed. It was impossible to keep an impassible facade and not empathize with the young woman’s plight, one nobody should ever be forced to experience. Yet there they were. She wanted to throw professional ethics down the window and hug the girl, tell her everything would be alright even though it would be a lie. But she held herself back. She had to keep the charade. Her wishes and feelings were irrelevant. In that room, only Catherine mattered.
Without raising her head, Catherine droned, “What should I do?”
“You have a few options. I know some of them might sound abhorrent for you now, but please listen to all of them,” Esther sighed. “I’m obliged to tell you all of them.”
“Mmm-hum”, Catherine mumbled and slightly nodded, shaking the curtain of hair covering her knees and legs.
“Your exams are all normal. We should make an ultrasound to make sure, but everything points to a healthy pregnancy. Your first choice is to carry on and raise the baby. It will be hard to be a mother at your age, but with your family’s support--”
Catherine snorted and grit her teeth. The Wallensteins had a long line of successful business and the girl could live comfortably without raising a single finger. Her late father left a sizeable fortune in a trust fund. However, they were very religious and traditionalist, not to mention Catherine's mother was far from being supportive. Esther realized she hit a landmine dead on and quickly moved on.
“We can find a couple that will adopt the baby upon birth. I know you don’t need to worry about money but they usually pay for all bills including exams and the delivery should you need a procedure. After birth, you may sign the adoption papers giving the baby up, or change your mind. They will expect you to go through the adoption procedure but you won’t be forced. You are safe, Cathy. Nobody can force you to make any choice.”
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The girl just sighed. Esther continued, “We can terminate the pregnancy if you want. Abortion is legal in either state, and your insurance covers the procedure. You have three choices and I’ll support you whichever way you choose. But I want you to take your time and think about what you want to do. We don’t have to hurry, there’s no need to rush things.”
The young woman wanted to laugh but she couldn’t find a single drop of mirth in her plight. Catherine was angry, sad, and despairing. She wanted nothing more than just vanishing. Stopping the pain. Her fingernails sunk into her shins but what she wanted was to rip open her ribcage and pluck her heart out. End everything. She asked herself what she did to deserve that. She got no answer.
“Fucking bastard,” the girl grimaced and growled as she whispered, “I’ll kill him before I go.”
Dr. Esther wasn’t supposed to hear that but she did nonetheless. That couple of sentences raised all kinds of red alerts in the physician’s mind. It was all the confirmation she needed. Catherine was indeed a victim through and through. The doctor cursed inside as she would probably need to involve the police. Catherine was barely eighteen and wasn’t a minor at the time of the assault so she wasn’t obliged by law to report. Nonetheless, it was the right thing to do. The physician felt conflicted. She didn’t want to force the girl but they had to report it. She felt cornered.
“Cathy, do you want to talk about it?” Esther offered.
“No?” She answered, oozing self-derision. Finally raising her head, she stared and demanded, “I want to terminate it. I need my life back, Esther.” Her tears mixed with her makeup, creating a mess.
Even with her makeup ruined, Esther had to admit the young woman was beautiful. Despite being legally an adult, Catherine still had some baby fat on her cheeks. She had a small frame and that girl-next-door air. The stark and cold demand sent a chill down the physician’s soul. She wanted to ask Catherine if she was sure, but it would be demeaning to do so.
“Then we should go and make the ultrasound now,” Esther replied, trying to sound professional. “Then we need to get clearance with your insurance and schedule a date for the procedure. You can change your mind anytime.”
Catherine opened her mouth as if to ask something but then shut it with a snap. Her momentary determination vanished and fear quickly replaced it. “Ho-how much is the procedure? Can we do it without the insurance?”
Esther sighed as she lowered and shook her head. “No, Catherine. We cannot and may not. You can’t sweep this under the rug, my dear. We will do the procedure through your insurance, and I need to call a friend of mine so you two can talk about what happened to you.”
Catherine’s first instinct was to turn her head around and look at the door. She almost bolted for it but her feet snagged on the chair’s arm as she tried to get down and almost tripped. Esther quickly went around the desk and held the younger woman by the shoulders.
Puckering her lips, Catherine looked up like a cornered rabbit. “Is your friend a cop?” She went livid as Esther nodded.
“A detective. Her name is not Olivia but you won’t be the first one to call her that,” Esther jested. “She has pretty much the same job but her partner is not called Elliot. It’s a woman too.”
Catherine snorted and ruefully shook her head. She asked just to be sure, “SVU? Seriously?”
Esther brushed a lock of hair out of Catherine’s face. “Can’t think of anyone as special right now. Catherine, please. Let me help you. I’m here for you. Detective Martinez has a psychology degree. She can help you.”
The girl nodded, blinked away a fresh stream of tears, and hugged the doctor. "I can't, Esther. Nobody can know what happened to me. The shame... my mother will kill me."
She knew the girl was overreacting but Esther could tell what happened and the circumstances. She helped deliver the girl eighteen years ago but recently moved to southern Manhattan. Catherine came came to her because she trusted her. "Can you think--"
"No. I looked up in the internet. You can't say a word unless I let you. No, please."
"Okay," Esther agreed as she tenderly ran her head over the girl's head. "You are correct. I can't and won't say anything. How about we go make that ultrasound and take some time to think things?"
"Fine. Let's do this exam."
Esther called for her assistant. Combined with the other exams, the ultrasound gave Catherine and her baby a clean bill of health. She’d refused to listen to the heartbeat and after cleaning up and putting her clothes back on, the two women were back at the office.
“I’m going to pick up my phone and call my friend over, okay?” Esther asked.
“Do you have to?” Catherine asked, desperate to find a way out.
She knew she couldn’t let her mother know about her pregnancy. She would get another beating and probably hear about how she was a slut for the rest of her life. She also would never again be able to show her face in school. Everyone would know how much of a slut she was. The guy who hurt her was rich and would probably walk away scot-free while her reputation would go up in flames like a witch at the stake. She’d remembered the news that only two percent of all rapists ever faced jail. One who could hire a battalion of the best lawyers New York City had to offer definitely wouldn’t.
“It’s the right thing to do, Cathy,” Esther’s reply was adamant but kind. “We can’t let the guy who hurt you get away with it. Just answer me one thing, did it happen in New York?" Cat nodded. "Let me call my friend. I’ll put it on the speaker and you stay silent if you want, okay?”
Catherine was hyperventilating. The memories of what happened to her, the pain of being violated, the humiliation, the struggle, all that replayed in her mind. Worse yet, she knew she had to commit a sin and kill the child. She thought she would never allow herself to love the offspring of that monster. Catherine wanted to vanish, to go away, to stab her belly until she bled it away. Mrs. Wallenstein had beaten her for way less than an unwanted pregnancy. She caught Catherine exploring her own body one time... No. The damage to her oh so precious social image would be immense. She remembered how her mother’s gossipy friends reacted when another girl they knew got pregnant before being properly married. The scorn, the badmouthing. The cruel giggles and rude cackling of those crows disguised as ladies. Catherine wanted to vanish.
Yet she couldn’t find the strength to fight back. Giving in to Esther’s demands, Catherine bit her lower lip and shut her eyes as she grimaced. After a long pause, she nodded. Esther’s heart was heavy as each dial tone on the phone made the young woman flinch as if a nail was hammered into her coffin.
"Just get it over with," Catherine whimpered.
She tuned out the phone call between Esther and her cop friend. All she knew was that the cop was on her way to get her statement. Then everyone would know and Cat’s life would end. Out of desperation and ignorance, she decided to take things into her own hands. She took her purse and stood up, decided to something very, very stupid. In Catherine's defense, she young, naive, and wasn't thinking straight. Maybe Dr. Esther should've restrained her but the physician had no way to know what she intended to do.
“I need some air. I’m going out, Esther. Call me when your friend arrives.”
The building had an open roof where people could see the New York skyline. Catherine easily found her way there by taking the elevator. In a twist of fate, she rode with a repair technician. A plan started to brew in her disturbed mind. Catherine distracted the technician and stole a pair of pliers from his tool belt.
On the deserted roof, she walked around idly, taking note of where the security cameras were. She found the perfect spot on the wire fence where she could cover the fence from the cameras with her body and started to cut the wires. A block away, the busy Broadway swarmed with people and cars and past that she could see Wall Street if she cared to look. Her breathing accelerated when the gap was almost wide enough for her to go through.
“Hey, what are you doing?” A man’s voice made her jump out of her skin.
She turned her head to see a security guard approaching her and accelerating as he noticed the hole in the fence. Without a second thought, she climbed through the hole, getting dozens of scratches on her skin as she scraped on the cut wires.
“Stop, lady. Please, come back here!” The guard pleaded.
Catherine glanced back and noticed he’d stopped a few meters away. Distressed, she shrieked, “Get away from me! If you come any closer, I’ll jump.”
“Don’t do it, miss. Look, talk to me,” He reached with a hand.
Despite being several steps away, his sudden movement startled Catherine. She shook her head and said, “Tell Dr. Helen it is not her fault.”
As the guard desperately dashed to hold her back, she jumped.
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That fateful day, William’s lunch break dragged longer than usual. He was in no hurry to go back to work. Maybe he should but hindsight was twenty-twenty. It’s too late now to play the blame game.
“She’s going to jump!” Someone shouted and shook William out of his post-lunch reverie. Like everyone else on the street, he looked up to see what was going on. Dozens of stories above him, a girl was on the wrong side of the safety fence. He could barely see her.
Then she jumped. William was paralyzed with existential dread by the scene. The girl looked young and oh Jesus why was she falling down? In his addled state, he didn’t notice she was falling straight at him. Or maybe not. It was a windy day and it only added to the irony of the situation. She came closer and closer until she reached the ground at what he guessed was terminal velocity. William had no way to measure it. It was irrelevant but it was what a frozen William was struggling to think at the moment.
The moment she fell right on his head, killing both of them. William’s neck broke and he felt only a sharp jolt of pain before he found himself out of his body.