Unsurprisingly, Senon did not return.

In his mind, Ain was rewinding the events, still trying to understand how he managed to miss the signs.

There weren't any, that's why.

To Ain, Senon looked like a pretty boy. A really pretty boy.

"Def totally understand," the goblin said. "Senon flatter than tombstone. Because Master human, unable to tell difference."

Troma nodded. "Female demon look closer to human than demon. Small horns, long tail. Still, Master so monogamous; Master not care about differences. Everyone equal."

Def sighed. "Magnanimous." A pause. "That not even the right word, idiot."

Troma snorted. "Then what is right word?"

Def pursed his lips. It was one of those moments, no doubt, were the question not asked, he would surely have known the answer. The ugly, little goblin furrowed his ugly little brows, eyes narrowed into thin slits. His veins popped out, face entirely contorted from the strain of trying to jog his few remaining brain cells.

"Def pretty sure he become stupid from head trauma," Def said, circling a finger around the bump where Troma's club, earlier, rearranged his brain matter.

Troma grew quiet, mimicking his comrade in how he pursed his lips, eyes narrowing as if to glimpse a distant idea.

Ain barely even followed their conversation at this point. He was still waiting on Senon to return, but even he began to suspect that she moved on to the next exam without him. It made sense, if what the goblins were saying was true.

"Def been wondering, Master," Def said, flashing a disgusting, toothy grin. "Since Master so generous about teaching, maybe Master teach Def and Troma Method. Maybe Def and Troma become new Calamity Lord... after Master... of course."

"A method?" Ain snapped back to reality. "I suppose I could, considering you are my subordinates."

Def's grin grew even wider. In fact, he looked completely diabolical. It should be no surprise to know that Def had no good intentions, or any sort of moral code about how he would use this power. If anything, in this decadent world of eat-or-be-eaten, Def was the relentless engine of Capitalism. With a Method, he could expand his business of mugging people, allowing himself to fall into greater debt.

Of course, Ain was optimistic about how practicing a rare Method might change the goblin's thinking. In a positive way. But even he knew that this assumption was likely wrong. Still, as a leader, he had responsibilities.

He put a hand on Def and Troma's shoulder, and closed his eyes. His breathing changed; the effort with which he inhaled was different from before, and his slow exhale seemed never-ending.

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When his eyes opened, he had a troubled smile.

"Something wrong, Master?" Def asked.

"Hmm." Ain considered the two goblins. "You two have absolutely no talent whatsoever."

Def's grin crumpled. He was absolutely crushed.

Troma, on the other hand, seemed ever more thoughtful. It was really bothering him, or so it seemed.

Ain chuckled. "Talent isn't everything."

"Really?" Troma asked. "But how Master know? Master so talented."

"Me?" Ain laughed. "I had no talent at all when I started out. If anything, my talent was stubbornness. I never gave up!"

"So Def and Troma can also learn to be strong like Master?" Def asked, hope twinkling in his beady, little eyes.

Ain looked away. "Hmm."

Def looked like he might cry.

"I don't actually know any Methods that you might be able to learn. We are too incompatible," Ain said. "You just don't have the ability to learn them. Your Sources have mostly elemental affinities."

"Elemental affinity bad?" Def asked, in his own way stubborn about the reality of the situation.

"It's not bad, Def," Ain said. "I just don't know any elemental Methods."

"Master can't create new Method for Def and Troma?" Def asked, once again in the bargaining stage of grief.

Ain laughed. "It's not that simple to create a whole new... Method..."

Def's gaze sharpened, as if it was a sword drawn from its sheath. He licked his lips, like a predator advancing on his prey. "Master can create new Method?"

Ain smiled. "It's not new. It is just a slight adaptation. A very long time ago, I used the Ever-Changing Sword Method. It was an incomplete, cursed, thing. To glimpse its true secret, I had to stand on a mountain of corpses - both friend and enemy - and drown in an ocean of blood."

Def chuckled, malevolently. "That sound like a Def and Troma Method."

"I also thought it was a Method for me. In those days, I carried a grudge in my heart, and no matter how many evils I defeated, my heart only became emptier and emptier. It wasn't until the very end, when loneliness had extinguished all my poisons and all my fires, that I comprehended the true meaning of that Method, and developed its true form: the Sword of Nirvana. I never got to use it, but I think I can teach it to you."

"It sound like very powerful Method, Master," Def said. "Goblin take good care of it."

Ain smiled. "I am sure that in this age the Sword of Nirvana would be considered a miracle, but you are learning an adapted version, not the real thing. Still, it should be plenty powerful for you to protect each other, and the friends we will make in the future."

Def's grin returned. "Of course, Master. Master need not worry. Def take good care of everyone. Def promise."

Ain smiled awkwardly, perhaps sensing the goblin's true intentions. "The Sword of Nirvana consists of two parts: The Sword of Beginnings, and the Sword of Endings. Perhaps, if you also achieve the metanoia I did, you can also comprehend the final, and most potent principle: the Sword of the Void."

"Def so excited!"

"I will first teach you how to learn the Sword of Beginnings. In the same way that the Beginning and the End leads to enlightenment of the ultimate Void, one can be made to comprehend the Concept of the Beginning itself."

"Def not understand a single word, Master."

"The Beginning and the End are aligned with affinities of..." Ain trailed off. "Let me put it this way. You can align your Source to the Beginning by mastering elemental techniques I will teach you."

Def nodded.

"Good. Since your Source is closer to Fire, I will teach you the Sword of the Fire Moon Method. Troma's Source is closest to Ice, so I will teach him the Sword of the Midnight Sun. When you master those two, and teach each other, you can open the way to the Sword of Beginnings. Any questions?"

Def shook his head.

"Troma has question," the goblin said, snapping out of his thoughts.

"What needs explaining?" Ain asked.

"Who the fak is Hed Troma? Troma cousin? How he make Def stupider than Troma make Def stupid?"

Def sighed and slammed his palm into his forehead. "Def think he prefer to learn Sword of Endings first, so he can end own suffering."

"Who make Def suffer?" Troma asked. "Troma have word with them."

"Shut up. Idiot."