Sigh, I’m tired of life.

I took the scissors and aimed right at my chest.

This is it. Once I do it, this misery will finally end. I can’t believe I lasted this long. Life’s unbearable, and I’m no masochist.

Just as I was about to, I heard a knock on my door.

Ugh, what now!

I rolled my eyes and hid the scissors before responding.

“What now, Shizuka.” I could barely force myself to speak. I stood there lifelessly while waiting for the voice to respond.

“It’s me, dear.” It was a warm voice, a voice that I could never forget. The voice I grew up with. My eyes widened.

“K-Kobayashi…-san…?”

I could feel her smile, even if I couldn’t see her. “Can I come in?”

I opened the door, and sure enough, I saw her figure. I may not have seen her for more than a year, but I could never forget her. She still looked the same, but without the uniform.

“What happened, dear? Why are you crying?”

I touched my cheek, and sure enough, I could feel tears streaming continuously. I felt warm arms wrap me. Something inside me snapped, and I started sobbing nonstop. After a long while, it was reduced to hiccups. She pulled away and said, “Feel better now?”

I nodded.

“I’m always willing to lend an ear for you, dear but you don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.” She continued pattiing my head.

“Akane-chan and the others hate me, and then there’s this girl who transferred to my school. I instantly warmed up to her and trusted her, and then I eventually found out that she’s the girl who left me all those years ago. I thought she was different, that she was not like the others, but it turns out that she’s the first-ever person to leave my side. I was naive enough to trust her. I should’ve known that it was only Koto-chan who cared about me.” My voice would hiccup pretty often.

“Dear, Chi-chan cares about you with all her heart. I know that she suddenly left, but she must’ve had a good reason for it. She would never leave your side. If it weren’t for her, I wouldn’t even know that things weren’t going well for you. She’d do anything for you.”

My eyes widened. My lips were slightly parted. “She… She did…?”

“Let’s go downstairs.”

I hesitantly agreed. In the living room, there were four people. There was Akane-chan, Shizuka, Chizuru-chan, and a familiar man. My eyes widened with confusion.

“Prime Minister Furukawa?” His expression was filled with concern, but his eyes had a flash of hurt when I called out to him. He immediately walked up to me and held me tightly. “Fuyuki! I’m sorry for everything. I-…”

I stood there awkwardly. This was the first time I’ve ever seen him in years. This was the first time we’ve ever interacted in my entire life. I looked at Kobayashi-san, and she smiled at me. “Uhh, Prime Minister Furukawa?”

He burst into tears. “I’m sorry for neglecting you all these years. I should’ve been there for you all this time. If I were only more responsible, this would’ve never happened!”

I felt a wave of confusion hit me. I could only mutter a “huh?” in response.

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“Takahashi-san, Kobayashi-san, and Satou-san told me everything. I’m so sorry for being such a terrible father to you! I should’ve taken care of you instead of getting drunk and not moving on from your mother’s death.”

The man continued sobbing. I didn’t know what to do. We may be physically close to each other, but there was an invisible wall between us. I just stood there and didn’t do anything.

“I understand if you find it hard to forgive me, but from this day onwards, I’ll always be home and make time for you.”

Why is he suddenly here all of a sudden? After all these years, this is the first time he’s ever talked to me. Not once has he even ever uttered my name. What does he want now?

I looked around and saw Chizuru-chan, Akane-chan, Kobayashi-san, and Shizuka watching our interaction.

“Uhh, we can sit down if you’d like, Prime Minister Furukawa.”

We both sat down, with me seated next to Kobayashi-san. The man spoke. “Thanks for raising my daughter while I wasn’t around, Kobayashi-san.”

“Fuyuki is like a daughter to me! Don’t worry! And he’ll eventually warm up to you.” She looked at me, and I looked at Furukawa-sama hesitantly.

“Uhh, Prime Minister Furukawa, may I speak to the others alone, please? I’m sorry if this came across as disrespectful.” I could feel my heart pounding.

He gave me a hurt smile. “I’ll go upstairs now.”

Akane-chan then looked at me and spoke. “I-I’m really sorry for letting my insecurities get in the way of our friendship. I even joined the others in isolating you from our friend group. I’ve been a terrible friend to you, and I just really want to apologize. You deserve better than how I treated you.”

She looked at Chizuru-chan before continuing. “I should’ve never left you by your side, like what Takahashi-san did, especially since those moments were one of the lowest points of your life! You just lost Yuki-san at the time, and what I did was let my envy get the best of me! I could’ve supported you and been there for you like how you would for me, but I didn’t.”

Her tears were threatening to fall. I looked at her reluctantly.

I guess she’s apologizing too… Why can’t I make myself care about this? Even with my own father, I couldn’t even make myself care! I guess that’s how broken people like me feel… Sigh, it doesn’t matter. Whether they apologize or not, I’ll still be fairly numb.

“How are Kaede-chan and Haruka-chan?”

She averted her gaze. “I guess they’re doing okay… Kaede-chan is still well… Kaede-chan…”

“Ah, I see.”

Why am I not surprised? I wonder how Akane-chan is surviving…

“Why are you here, Akane-chan?”, I asked.

“I just wanted to make things right with you…” She started playing with her hair.

“Okay. Are they treating you well, Akane-chan?”

She averted her gaze again. “Not really, but it’s not the point.”

I could feel my fists clenching on my own.

I guess they’re still being brats… Sigh, people like them are unreasonable…

“You should leave them.”

“I don’t know. We’ve been friends since I could remember. And-“

“You said that they treat you like trash. You don’t have to endure being with trash.”

“I-… I don’t know… They’re still my friends and—“

“Do whatever you want.”

Her eyes widened for a split second. “Anyways, Fuyuki-chan, how’ve you been doing?”

“Nothing much.”

You don’t need to know anything, Akane-chan. Something inside me doesn’t wanna tell you.

“O-oh, uuhhh… Would you like to talk to Chizuru-chan? Who knows, maybe she’s the—“ Chizuru-chan looked at her, pleading. She chuckled. “I guess I’ll give you two some time to talk.”

With that, Akane-chan, Kobayashi-san, and Shizuka left the living room. We sat there in awkward silence before we both tried to break it.

“I just wanted to-“

“Why did you-“

“You can go first, Chizuru-chan.”

“No, you go first, Fuyuki.”

“Why’d you leave those years ago? You left right after you promised to never leave me.”

She couldn’t look at me straight in the eye. “The thing is, we had to move to Nagano. I tried to plead with my dad but it didn’t work…”

I guess that’s pretty reasonable…

“Ah, I see…”

“I didn’t want to leave you, I swear! I really do care!” She took my hand, pleading to me.

I looked at her blankly. “I understand, but that doesn’t mean I forgive you. It’s unreasonable, but I don’t know…”

“I understand. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner. I got scared that you’ll hate me.”

“I don’t think I would if you told me because I’m sure you would’ve told me the reason.”

She scratched her nape. Her other hand was still holding mine. “I guess I learned that the hard way… But I don’t have any more secrets! I promise!”

“Oh yeah, why’s Furukawa-sama suddenly here?”

“He’s been way too negligent as a father! He doesn’t even know what happened to you if it weren’t for me and Kobayashi-san contacting him! And it wasn’t easy either. Seriously though, he’s such a jerk!” I could feel the anger in her voice.

“You didn’t have to do that for me…”

She squeezed my hand. “I wanted to do this for you, Fuyuki. I can’t just let you rot in your room by yourself and let that man remain ignorant of it. That’s his obligation as your father! He neglected you so much that you can’t even call him “father.”. It’s been going on for far too long!”

“Relax, he’s still the prime minister…”

“That still doesn’t give him the right!”

I couldn’t help but chuckle. “Thanks for everything, Chizuru-chan…”

She squeezed my hand even tighter now, but I don’t mind.

“I promised you that I’d never leave your side, right?” I could see the sincerity in her expression.

I could feel the heat in my cheeks.

“Yeah…”

We continued chatting for a while. It took me some time to realize that the others had already left.

•••

It’s been days since all of that happened. It helped ease up the pain for a bit, but it hasn’t fully disappeared.

I was in my room, contemplating whether I should call my editor or not. I then heard a knock in my room. ”Come in!”

It was Shizuka, with her signature stoic expression. “How’re you feeling now, Fuyuki-sama?”

I thought about it for a little while. “I guess I feel a bit more at ease now…”

Her expression was less tense now. “I’m contemplating whether I should call my editor after disappearing for more than a month…”

Her lips were slightly curved upwards. “Your editor would understand, Fuyuki-sama. Besides, your fans are waiting for the next chapter, including me, Kurai-sensei.”

My eyes widened. “Y-You know!?”

“I’ve been a loyal fan for quite some time now. Who knew that the ever-mysterious Kurai-sensei is 3 years younger than me? I actually noticed the mask in your room.”

“I just never took you for someone who reads manga… If I only knew, I would’ve hid the mask…”

She sighed. “Just as when I thought that you were starting to be more open… At the end of the day, you are still Fuyuku-sama…”

I looked at the ceiling and sighed. “I wonder if things will get better…”

“So, will you be coming back, Kurai-sensei?”

“I guess I will.”