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Chapter 16

We walked until just before dark. I spent most of that time meditating, while I had only taken a boot to the face - a miracle really for my first true skirmish- I needed to work through my killing of others. Three lives, snuffed out just like that. In my last life I had never been in a position to hurt anyone, let alone end them. In my arms was Luka, while Sky sat on my shoulder. Both were dozing, and I wasn’t sure how she stayed in place. My gait was not the smoothest, although I had become quite graceful while learning to dance and fight. A small part of me couldn’t help but think about how clumsy I always used to be.

As Adrien called for us to break and make camp alongside the merchant group, I pulled myself out of my stupor and set up my tent. Elric came over to help me with it but didn’t say anything. I got the feeling that he wasn’t used to helping people through personal crises and I was okay with that. They were, after all, still strangers. What was normal for them in this world, wasn’t quite normal to me. The time I had spent in Ravos so far had been pretty isolated. It had been primarily infused with training, learning, or working. I had grown a touch comfortable with killing beasts for food, and goblins for leveling and protection, but humans were a different matter.

What would Jess think of me now? The thought startled me, it had been a while since I let myself think about her. Just thinking about her brought an image I had forgotten to my mind. It was her smiling face, enclosed by wavy red hair. Her green eyes were sparkling, ever sparkling. She was light and kindness and compassion. Her smile was toothy, pearlescent with lips adorned by a deep red lipstick. My chest tightened as I thought about her. I shook my head trying to clear the thought before I spiraled. I took a deep breath and finished pounding in the last stake for my tent.

“Thanks, Elric. Appreciate it.” Even to me I sounded like I was hurting.

“Yeah, no problem kid. Adrien’s out getting something to eat. Or you can break bread with the caravan folk.” he pointed over his shoulder at them. Despite agreeing to travel with them we still made two separate camps.

I only nodded before I threw my pack into the tent and unrolled my bedding. I left the foxes in there to rest for a bit with the flap open before finding a spot near the fire. Liana and Amelia were chit chatting, and they seemed to glance at me with concern as I sat down. I ignored them, instead looking into the fire.

Would my mother still see me as her son? What about my brothers? I just killed... I tried to pull myself away from these thoughts but couldn't, my morals were deeply in question. I felt a notification go off, seeing incomplete images of everyone as I thought about them. My memory skill was helping me remember them. I tried to shrug away the notification.

I gulped. My heart was heavy, doubly so as I finally stopped trying to reject the memories of my past. I don’t think they’d reject me. Zoe, though... She was pretty opinionated. Years of rejecting the memories of my first family was hard to negate. I felt a longing to speak to them all. To tell them all everything. Mom, Dad, Zach, Zoe, Aaron, and Jess... Someday I'd like to see them again... Tell them about this world of magic and myth and adventure. They’d never believe me. I felt something wet tickling my cheeks and chin.

It took a second or two to realize I was crying. I blinked, and blinked and blinked again until I could focus again. I noticed right away that there was a deer rotating above the flames on a makeshift spit, and the smell was immaculate. I glanced to my left and saw that Liana and Amelia were still sitting by each other. They looked away as if they had been caught doing something wrong. A sigh escaped my throat and I stood up. I started to stretch, noticing they were all trying not to stare. They seemed concerned.

“You can say whatever you want to you know, I know I seem like a kid but...” I shrugged and wiped away the tears on my face. “I’ll be okay.”

“That was the first time, aye?” Elric was the first to speak. Everyone else turned to me and I sat back down.

“It was. That's not... that's not the only reason I’m upset but it’s the main one.”

“And what of your level?” Adrien asked, his usual accent missing.

“Fifty one. Actually. Do I evolve skills first or take the second class first?” I tried to deviate the conversation. I didn’t actually want to tell them about my past life, or the memories I had just been subjected to.

“Depends, any of those skills going to be pertinent to your new class?” Elric jumped in, no doubt as eager as me to move away from morose topics.

“Well, how long after I check them do I have before I am forced to evolve or lose it?” Not many in Arborton grew enough to evolve skills or even gain their second class, and it hadn’t come up much in my readings. I tended to focus on a dozen topics at once, so unless it was extremely interesting topics would be neglected.

“You'll have until the next sundown.” Liana’s soft voice piped up, joining the conversation.

“I see... And when I upgrade to a pact I need to make sure I’m ready to sleep right?” Pact magic would influence my physiology and system a little bit. Companion pacts essentially shared a portion of the companions souls with each other, and could physically, psychologically, or magically change both parties.

“Correct, as with your class change. Both happening at once may leave you very sore though.” Liana tilted her head and smiled. “Why don’t you check which ones have leveled up? You don’t have to tell us if you don’t want to.”

Adrien grumbled a few feet away, turning the deer over the flames. Occasionally a bit of grease would drip down and cause them to sputter excitedly. I glanced at them each in turn, reflecting again on how much I could trust them with. I chewed my lip and turned my attention to my notifications. Aside from the [Fox Friend] skill, none were ready to evolve. There had been some leveling gains, but I suspected I didn’t meet the qualifications for an upgrade. I did, however, gain a new skill in my main class.

Congratulations, you have gained a new skill!

[Compendium Actualization] LVL:1

[Compendium Actualization]: Through trial and error you have created a number of rune circles. Through trial and error you have decreased the casting speed to the best of your abilities, suffering injuries and nearly losing your life in the process on more than one occasion. This trial and error has gifted you a natural affinity towards runedance. Now, should you begin a dance you may begin said dance with a portion of the runes already complete, based on your most complete memory of the rune. Warning: This effect only applies to dances you have successfully cast in the past. The amount of the circle that can be preempted is dependent on the level of [Compendium Actualization].

I refocused for a moment as Elric passed me a deer leg, perfectly roasted with a little bit of salt and herbs. Greedily, I bit into it. It looked far too large for a single meal but I was ravenous. The others were all eating as well. The meat vanished swiftly. My chin and cheeks were covered in grease and venison scraps as I tore into it. I could feel my stomach bulging with the weight of the meat. After I finished it I stood up and cut a couple fox sized pieces. Walking towards my tent I glanced over my shoulder. “I’m gonna go get my class and make a pact, see you guys on the morrow.”

They said their goodnights and I snuck into the tent. The foxes were awake, no doubt roused by the smell of food. I let them eat for a few moments, inspecting Luka’s body as he had been kicked before. I was satisfied that he was only a touch bruised. Plus, if he accepted the pact he would likely be healed through the process. Mana would flood his and mine and Sky’s bodies and bring all of us closer. It would affect us physically, change our muscles and features. Not drastically of course, but to a minor degree.

I simply sat and pet them both as they ate. It didn't take long for them to devour the food and by the time they were finished both looked at me knowingly. “Are you guys ready? I’m so nervous...” Sky replied by nudging my hand with her head and Luka curled up at my side. Then yipped adorably. I sighed in preparation before selecting the notification.

Would you like to evolve the skill [Fox Friend] to [Twin Pact]?

I mentally selected yes and felt a rush of mana begin to swirl around us. I felt my muscles begin to tingle and then a sudden burst of energy rushed at me as Luka agreed to be my bonded companion. A second wave wrapped around me like a cyclone as Sky did the same. My eyes started to close and I forced myself awake long enough to start my class selection. The rest would happen while I was unconscious.

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In the blink of an eye I was standing over tranquility. The surface below me was water and reflective, but it did not wet my feet. Ripples spread out from me, the reflections of the star filled sky shaking and moving like shooting stars in conjunction with the ripples. Podiums lit around me, similar to the first time I chose a class. Circles with a variety of classes surrounded me.

I took a deep breath, it was time. A part of me was worried that I hadn’t done enough to gain the class that I wanted, that I should have given myself more time and capped my skills prior to choosing a class. Another part recognized that my weaving and smithing skills weren’t able to be practiced in the middle of the woods, or on the road. I hesitantly picked up the first book that I reached. It looked like a cookbook.

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[Apprentice Chef]. It sat upon a small countertop, something like an island in the kitchen of a wealthy family, the sort of wealth I had never perceived. The cookbook showed me recipes and images of me cooking in a professional kitchen. It showed me following the directives of the chef, as they yelled at or praised me for succeeding and failing. It showed me living a mundane, inconsequential life and likely not exceeding level one hundred in my lifetime. Granted, I could always change the class once I hit level twenty five, but it looked like a stretch to even make it that far in a reasonable time frame. I sighed after only a short time and set the book back down.

I started to peruse the individual podiums, gleaning little from each before scoffing and discarding them. There was a book titled [Pedantic Sycophant] that just described me as being an agreeable yes man who would lecture those who offended the one I was close to. I rolled my eyes. The book showed me going on rants about a variety of topics that I truly didn’t care about, simply because someone else who I was following cared about them. It was one thing to support others who you care about, it was another to grovel and worship the words they said as though they could do no wrong. While I was one who was willing to share my opinion, this version of me was... Gross... I couldn’t imagine someone holding the door open for a lady I liked and going off on a rant that the lady was capable of opening her own damn door. That was one of the examples in the book, and very much did not represent me. I wondered what had qualified me for it.

Another book was [Courier] which was interesting as the only skill I had that was even remotely similar or in line was [Running]. I put that one down right away, I didn't enjoy running. I ran every day to stay in shape, because even with the system I didn’t trust my body not to revert to the shape I had had in my past life. Call me obsessive, but even skipping a day had started to make me a touch anxious. THe class book showed me running from town to town, city to city, to deliver messages from citizens and lords and lay people. It was a decent living, a comfortable one aside from the roadside dangers that were so prevalent all across Ravos.

I spent some time skimming the various titles. [Hunter] was a generic class that revolved around seeking, hunting, skinning and eventually eating the prey they decided to target. I had done a fair amount of hunting and dressing our kills with my father over the years, but as I had never taken a skill related to it I also had no interest in a class revolving around it. Killing, for me, was a means to an end and not the lifestyle I wished to pursue. I accepted that in my line of work I would kill when necessary, but I would not seek out pointless death.

One book that I had anticipated was surrounded by red light on what looked like an altar. [Assassin] was a manga that showed me stalking and lashing out at humans, elves, goblins, beasts, dwarves, dragonkin and more. Skulking through the shadows and cloaking my blade in poisons. Stabbing backs and slitting throats. The manga was good, and I walked with it as I stepped towards other podiums. I read through it. I wasn’t interested in the class whatsoever, but it was a touch entertaining.

I wandered and read and watched productions for what felt like hours. As soon as I’d finish one I’d find another and keep walking. I was trying to find the smithing classes but had a hard time in doing so, for a while. Eventually, similarly to the last time, there was a smaller circle of podiums with blue lights illuminating all but one of the stories. The last was lit with golden light. I naturally gravitated towards it first.

[Emissary of the God of Pandemonium], I frowned at the title. It was odd that it didn’t name the god in question, but I felt it must be none other than Miamora, the god who brought my soul to this body. I flipped through the pages. They were thin and many like a bible, and the story read like it too. I set it down quickly but thought about it a bit. My parents had never heard of Miamora, and the few books I could find did not name them... I wonder what their true identity is on Ravos.

After my revelation to my parents, they had gone to ask a priest to close out our home from the eyes of gods or demons. That was one of the reasons they had sent me away, in this world of magic they feared that my naming what could be a devil would cause it to appear. Such things were not unheard of, depending on the connection between the superior being and the mortal. The other was that they had to decide to believe me or to consider that their son had been possessed or turned insane. At the time, all I had been able to think was that they were going to kick me out, but they had felt it necessary to send me off on my own while they discussed things and even go to the local church involved. They hadn’t heard the name Miamora either.

I shifted my attention from the lectern holding the golden book, and towards something new. This time there was a loom and the fabric folded in front of it held the details for a class that I intuitively knew was called [Traveling Tailor]. The class seemed fairly basic. It showed me making clothes and cloth for the denizens of Ravos, stopping from town to town and staying for a short while. It showed me as a merchant, leaning further into the business and sales side of things while maintaining a specialization in tailoring. I saw myself adorned in fabrics and clothing that I had never imagined, flamboyantly showboating to those I was attempting to sell to. I set down the roll of fabric and shook my head.

It wasn’t so much that I didn’t want to be a tailor, more so that it wasn’t a craft I was passionate about. I moved on, pondering the last two classes as I stepped up. One of them was a pedestal with a purple crystal sat on top. The pedestal looked like an arm rising through the earth and the orb shimmered teasingly. It wanted me to look into it and I obliged. [WorldWalker] had appeared again. I didn’t understand why it had changed from a flat black rock to a crystal growing from a hand, nor why the story was a bit different. It seemed to show more of my [Bladedancer] class’s skills than it did of its own. I would hop through a rift in space and come out to battlefields. I could train everywhere, wander the universe. I could save the weak and slaughter the strong and be hailed as a hero in worlds across galaxies. It was highly synergistic with my current class but it felt like pieces were missing. I stepped away after it showed me hunting for materials on another world, a world of fire and lava and heat and death.

The last lit podium in the circle was an anvil with a hammer sat on it. I lifted the hammer and was inundated with the story of a craftsman. The [Wayfaring Smith] was one who journeyed and self-sustained. Similar to the [Traveling Tailor] they went from place to place and gathered much of their own materials. They made new unique weapons and arms, but were not limited to a solitary craft. Despite being represented with a smith's tools, the class could work with near any trade. I saw the image of a dwarf digging through mountains for the perfect iron, enriched by mana and the elements. An elf sneaking into the den of a spider queen to procure her silk. A hunter slaying a massive lizard to make leather armor with its hide. The representation of the anvil was because that was what I associated with the most, but any of these paths were plausible. The class would change based on which craft was a focal point, but could include non focal skills as well.

I took the hammer with me, knowing in my heart that this was the best class for me. I kept wandering around and found a few more anvils, looms and miniature kitchens. I found more sword classes and even a wizards class called [Runescriber] that seemed interesting. Despite that, I found no other classes labeled with the blue light. I found no others that truly resonated with me, not like the [Wandering Smith] did. After what felt like days of aimless wandering and reading and watching, I willed myself to accept the class.

At first I felt nothing and slipped from the endless tranquil sea to the darkness of sleep. Then, from tranquility I slipped into agony. Pain wracked through my body, and my muscles sundered. My bones cracked, and twisted and broke and shattered. I felt blood run from my eyes and my ears. Iron laced the inside of my mouth. My first class up was nothing like this. Is it because of the beast bond? No... nobody told me it could be like this... I thought to myself as I pushed through the pain, the agony that raced throughout me. I barely recognized the system notification as it appeared

Caution, a seed has sprouted within your core.

Integrating Seedling of Pandemonium.

I let out a defiant roar as the pain redoubled, not that it had stopped but it felt like the agony before was a tickle in comparison. I forced closed my bleeding eyes and when I opened them again, still pained and quivering, the room was no longer black. I was back in the endless white, a familiar face grinning down at me. Featureless and alien, the god Miamora’s face twisted and shifted from a normal human grin to that of a monster and then to that of a clown. I panted away the pain, readying to say something before they held up a hand.

“Ah! I had wondered how long you might keep me waiting, young Lios, or should I call you Isaac Duran? Don't answer that, I don't actually care. Congratulations, you have lived long enough to sprout my seed! I know that doesn’t mean anything to you but, well, it is quite exciting for me.” The god flamboyantly flipped their hand up and shrugged. “But you probably wonder what is happening to you, aye? A seed is like... An impression given by a greater being. Given by something beyond your comprehension as a mortal.”

As they rambled I squirmed and let out another yell, my leg felt like it was being ripped off at my hip.

“Even we deities are unsure how they will grow. What I can say is that a seed is either a great gift, or a great curse. They will change and lock your class and are unable to be removed. So, long story short. I gifted you a piece of power, worry not though. It will not allow me to control you. I wish it would but that has never been the case before. While each sprouted seed will yield different fruits, they are largely reigned in by the type of seed they are. Yours... Well I could tell you how it’s likely to evolve but... Where is the fun in that?”

I writhed, barely taking in their words. I felt the air escape my lungs for a few terrifying moments until they repaired themselves and I was able to breathe again. I screamed a soundless scream, my chest compressing as all air fled again. My back twisted and creaked. My spine snapped and immediately repaired itself. It felt like there was a sentient creature searching my body for anything it could latch onto, for anything inadequate enough to warrant being fixed. My body wasn’t in my control and all I could perceive were some lunatic's speech and the agony flowing through me.

“Ooh this is always so amusing. Normally, a seed is given for an individual's last class and cannot be given for their first. But I didn’t want to wait so long.” The god leaned against nothing and an apple appeared out of nowhere. They took a large bite, nearly half of the apple, before tossing it over their shoulder into nothingness. “So the moment I found your soul I planted it. I wonder, how will your backwater new world fare with your interference. ‘Tis a shame you didn’t take my class. Imagine, wielding pandemonium all on your own and aided by the seed sprouting. Imagine the way folks would scream before you and quake as they were forced to their knees. Instead you wanted to be a stupid smith. Bah, well, no matter.”

The god paused for a few moments and tapped their chin, giving me respite from their monologue.

“But, I will gift you one more thing before you wake. Should you be coherent enough to speak during your first tribulation I shall grant you a single question. There are off limits questions, but I doubt you’ll touch upon those.” The sharp toothed, bestial grin returned. The god was predatory, hungry.

It took everything I had to endure, but I soaked in their words. I used them to focus on something other than the feeling of being crushed, squeezed, pulled apart and sewn back together. I wasn’t sure how long it took for me to say something, only that during that entire time the god never once stopped talking. Their words were meaningless, talking about how bored they were. I finally, after hours or days or months of suffering, asked the question that had been in the back of my mind ever since arriving in Ravos.

“Is it possible for me to return to my old life, to return to the time period I died in?” I felt I already knew the answer. Miamoras laugh -I was convinced now that the god had no presence on Ravos, but somehow had a connection to the system- echoed in the endless field of white.

“I am quite disappointed in you Alexilios. That is such a surface level question, But I suppose it is on me for having higher expectations for a mortal. No, no you cannot return. Even with the [Worldwalker] class you can only visit worlds that hold magic in their atmosphere, else you would cause an implosion with you as the focal point. I will not clarify why.” The god turned and acted as though they were checking an invisible watch on their wrist. “Ah, well, it’s been swell. Good luck with your sprouting seed, should you survive this tribulation I foresee much growth in you. Toodles.”

And without so much as a puff of smoke, Miamora vanished and I was left to contemplate my pain.