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Envy

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Pyrex walked into today saying that Gorge pretended to be me so that he wouldn't have to admit that I was his mate. I was furious! Is he ashamed of me? Am I not good enough to even show his relatives? 

He told me that couldn't be further from the truth before he tried covering up his actions with excuses like, "It's considered taboo for a siren and a human to date," or, "I love you, I really do, but I didn't want to risk losing my family just so that they could know who you are."

The last reason softened my wrath quite a bit, but I was still so angry. He made up for it that night however. It was probably the funnest night we've had yet. He had this apologetic look on his face that just drove me wild. Him losing his sadness in our lust was...amazing.

I still didn't forgive him completely since I wanted a favor so that he could show me around the town. Gorge offered to show me around, but I didn't want her too. I wanted to spend an evening with Pyrex like that. It sounds so romantic.

He also brought some of his and his mother's tasty snacks. Harlow used a machine to reheat the bread, and I couldn't believe how good it was. I never knew Pyrex could cook. It's a refreshing discovery. 

He isn't the only one learning new things though. I found that the ice powers we wield when we fuse are starting to ebb into me some. I learned about it when I moved a small orb water that I had been staring at for a few minutes. I was trying to make out the reflection of the water, but I figured out a talent of my own instead.

Since then, I've practiced every day as I try to hone it into something usable. I'm still a ways off, but with a little effort each day, I'm taking tiny steps towards being more then just a lover. I'll be a fighter too.

If I get good enough with the icy and water powers, I should be able to move around with a pool of water underneath me. Pyrex won't have to carry me every where, and I'll be able to do my own tasks. The world will open up to me.

It's hard though. Trying to learn about something that you don't understand feels so bad sometimes. It's like I'm straining to lift an object with my mind. Sure, I may have the potential to do it, but it isn't intuitive like lifting a rock or whipping a jellyfish with your tail.

I eventually told Tellara though. She always listens to my rantings, so it sort of just slipped out one day whenever I was talking about how I felt trapped sometimes. It isn't the worst thing though. She, Gorge, and Pyrex give me a lot of company, but I want more. What can I say? I'm greedy.

Pyrex likes that side of me though. He says that because I enjoy things so freely, it lets him do the same. He told me that my rants and carefree attitude lets him forget. He's talked about how he was soldier, but only tiny bits and pieces here or there.

He's never told an entire story of battle or having to kill someone or something. I can't blame him. Whenever we used our ice powers on The Fog, I almost felt bad for weird guys who got killed by us. Almost.

That didn't stop Pyrex from feeling bad though. He had this way of falling into these long stares at nothing every now and again. I don't think he's aware of it either. He just returns to some hellish nightmare...If I ever see him liek that, I jump onto his back as I kiss his cheek.

It hurts to see him like that, but him seeing me acting all mopey over his mopey-ness would probably just make him even more mopey. That's what I think at least. It makes sense in my head ok?

I started writing in a journal after I a few days of being in the pools. I was always super good at killing time since I spend so much time alone in that pool, but that was because I forgot about how it felt to be with people. 

It's a situation where after I had a taste of it, I could never go back. Kinda like Pyrex. One taste and I was hooked. I can say the same for me though. Each time he sees me after he comes back from trying to get a good position for his diplomacy thing, he shows me a full smile that creases the corner of his eyes.

That's how you tell if someone's smile is fake. A real smile shows both halfs of someones teeth while causing a whole bunch of wrinkles. That and the eyes close a little. It reminds me of fake laughs, though people are better at those. A real laugh starts in the chest rather than at the lips, and it starts with an explosion or a surprise. IT happens before the person can suppress it.

Harlow has a way of only giving out fake smiles and fake laughs. It makes me nervous around him. I can't read his eyes since their just small beads too, but Pyrex trusts him. They both talk a good bit about how poisons and the like work. They remind me of Tellara and me. 

We talk about anything under the sun that comes across our minds. She usually just sits and listens, but she always comes back to hear more, so I'm not very worried that she isn't enjoying herself. She's probably just shy. She's the opposite of me in that regard.

That doesn't change the way I worry about her sometimes. She always has this way of holding things in like shes holding back. IT's different then Harlow's holding back though. She holds herself back because she's scared of what others will think. Harlow does it because he wants something from the people around him. I just haven't figured out what yet.

I don't think it's that important though. You know what is? Pyrex is taking me out today! I'm so excited! I made sure to clean my scales and brush my hair so that I would sparkle in the sun. He won't have any need to hide me after he sees how good I look. I hope at least.

But still, I am super pumped. He'll probably show me his favorite sites around town before he takes me to a sunset where he'll take me into his arms and we'll kiss.

I doubt that fantasy will become a reality, but he'll be trying I'm sure. Even without making the perfect date, the thought will count. I think so at least. 

I'm over preparing though because it's all I can think about. I've brushed my hair a dozen times and I've re-glossed my nails, but I'm just so excited. 

Interrupting my happy jittering, a knock on the door causes me to drop all of my beauty products before I lay across the surface as though I've been laying there the whole time. I can't have him thinking I actually tried to look bueatiful. It's better if he thinks it's effortless. 

The man of the hour walks in before I turn my head saying, "Oh Pyrex you're here-"

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He takes my breath away. He walks in a pair of sleek leather shoes with a pair fitted jeans. His shirt moves as his arms slide back and forth because his muscles flex. Because of how broad his shoulders are, the shirt hangs from his chest and shoulders while his arms fill out the sleeves just enough. The maroon shade of the shirt complements his now gray skin.

He cut his hair and since he shaves two days ago, the inklings of a beard have started to form. I don't understand where he put the tails or the horns on his back, but wow. His short haircut shows of just how sharp his jaw is. I'm melting looking at him, and he's all mine.

The thought generates a huge grin on my face before he stops walking and blinks a few times. He says in his deep voice, 

"You look enchanting Allure."

I bite my lip for a moment before I suppress the urge to jump on top of him. Ravaging him sounds so good, but I want to savor this feeling some more. I say in return, "You're looking pretty good too, though I think you could have made yourself a little cleaner."

He grins back before he says, "I went for a rougher look.  I wanted you to take the limelight."

I splash my tail as I say, "I don't think I'd need you to let me. It tends to happen."

He grabs his chin as he stares to the side saying, "I don't know. I look pretty dashing if I say so myself."

I roll my eyes before I swim underwater with the crisp cold waking me up. I jump out of the water, and I land on his outstretched arms before he says, "Alright. Are you ready to see your disguise?"

I've been wondering how he would transport me around the town during out excursion, but he carries me outside of the pool room where we pass the squishy sounding door. A chair with wheels on the side of it appears before he lays me on it. He lifts a veil along with a turquoise dress that flows down towards a persons angles, but in my case, it runs to the bottom of my tail. 

It fits around my sides and my waist with a soft fabric without restraining me or preventing any movement. I say, "How did you manage to get it to fit so...perfectly?"

He places a blue veil across my face before a wry grin grows across his face. He says, "I'll leave it to you to figure out."

He must have asked Tellara. She and I tried on dresses the other day since I asked too. Gorge owned quite a few before she transformed into a hivemind, so I found two or three that I liked. Gorge even offered them to me, but this was an entirely different dress.

He had to have hired a tailor to make this. The gesture was so sweet. It makes me crumble a little bit before pulls out two pieces of jewelry. He places a band around my wrist before he walks behind me. After putting the necklace around my neck, he kisses the side of my neck before he wraps his head around mine.

We lock lips before he leans back and smiles a warm, charming grin as he says, "Now you look perfect. Are you ready to go m'lady?"

I blush for a moment at him before I say, "Of course...take me away."

He covers the bottom of my fin with the bottom of my dress before he rolls me out with my arms exposed. I say, "Won't my arms give me away?"

He shakes his head before saying, "Your skin tone reminds me of the aquarell. You don't have to worry about that. You're hair and your fin are what allow others to see you as a siren."

"So I don't have to worry about using my arms?"

He grins saying, "Nope. You can go buckwild...in fact, please do. I want you to enjoy yourself. I know it must be cramped being in their all the time, but I'll be taking you out more often from now on. It just took a while to get the right dresses and custom wheelchair and all that. I didn't mean to leave you waiting for so long, and I didn't tell you because I wanted it to be a surprise."

My voice cracks for a moment as a single tear crosses down my cheek. I murmur, "It's been wonderful....Thank you."

"It's worth seeing you smile."

He pushes me down the hallway for several minutes before he says, "I hope you enjoy Dellurian."

"What's that?"

"It's a region to the south of here known for it's unique kind of cooking. I figured you'd be tired of bread by now, so I wanted to show you one of my favorite spots to go out."

I squint my eyes as I say, "Do you take all the ladies here?"

He scratches the side of his face before he says, "I haven't been in a stable relationship in over ten years, so I haven't been on a date here in what feels like a lifetime, but yeah. I've taken a girl here when I was 15."

I lean my head back before I smile at him saying, "I guess that's good enough." I lean my arm back as I press my fingertips against his waist as I reach downwards saying, "You might have to make up for it later."

He grabs the edge of my hand before he interlocks his fingers with mine saying, "I'd be happy to oblige."

I like that spicy attitude e picked up after we'd been dating for several weeks. Instead of reeling back from my little teases, he returns his own. It keeps me on my toes.

We roll past the exit of quarry with slabs of unharvested marble lining the edges of the pit we dug a tunnel through for giving us entry into the new base. Several new cuts into the marble reveal themselves in the orange light of the sun while the smell of freshly ground rock enters my nose. Even though I lack a real understanding of human economics and all that, I can put two and two together.

Pyrex harvested the marble near here and sold it in town for the money he needed for this whole date. He really wanted to make this work. I'll make sure to pay him back in full later. 

We pass through the bumpy terrain before we reach a small, stone road There creatures known as birds chirp high pitched sounds that cut through the air, but their songs please me. The warm air carries a pleasing level of water in it, so my skin never drys. It feels perfect.

Pyrex hums with the birds carrying a tune, so I join him with my own melody as we pass across several miles of terrain over an hour. I enjoy the trip far more then I believed I would, and as we cross a hill, I chatter with a giddy delight before we pass over a hill.

The city appears in front of me, so I say, "Wow..."

He beams, "It's wonderful isn't it?"