Novels2Search
Ashlyn’s choice
First kiss (part 4)

First kiss (part 4)

I felt the seat next to me move when Jared suddenly arose from his alcohol-induced slumber. “Is it already over?” He rubbed his bloodshot eyes.

“Still one hour left I am afraid,” Richards answered.

“Dear Lord… Excuse me please, I think I am going to really be sick now,” he bolted from his seat, vanishing behind the curtains of the boxed space.

“I should go after him and check if he is all right. Excuse me,” I was about to stand up, when Edith’s hand grabbed my wrist.

“Is that really wise Ashlyn?” She raised her perfectly shaped eyebrows. “We don’t want any rumors about you spending time alone with my brother.”

“I’ll be right back, I promise,” I assured her. As discreetly as I could I sneaked out of the box and followed after him.

I found Jared in the corridor, leaning against the open window. He was taking large gulps of fresh air, inhaling it loudly.

“Are you all right?” I stepped closer to him.

“What are you doing here, Ashlyn? Are you out of your mind? What if someone finds us here, alone in the dark?”

“I only came here to check if you’re well, Jared.”

He let out a tired sigh. “I am sorry I behaved rudely toward you before,” he lifted his hand and gently stroked my cheek. “You were right. I don’t know what am I doing with my life. I feel so lost,” he admitted. “Ashlyn…” He whispered into my ear. “I miss you so...”

“Oh Jared! I miss you too. It’s just that I don’t see you lately anymore and...”

“Hush my dear,” he cut me off. “You look so beautiful tonight. I envy the lucky gentleman who will own your heart,” his exploring fingers moved into my hair. Seeing him this vulnerable, I made a terrible choice of confiding in him.

“My heart already belongs to someone,” I admitted while timidly glancing into his blue eyes.

His expression twisted into a scowl. “Who is it?” He inquired roughly.

The story has been stolen; if detected on Amazon, report the violation.

“You really don’t know?” No matter how much I searched his bright irises there was no trace of recognition in them. “It’s you… Jared. It has always been you,” I let out desperately. The strange mixture of relief, fear and guilt washed over me, but no matter how hard it was, I had to finish what I started.

A moment of suffocating silence hung between us, threatening to unravel my false bravado. “Me?” He asked at last, perplexed.

I watched him wide-eyed as he slowly lowered his head, his lips stopping only a few inches away from mine. “May I kiss you, Ashlyn?” He murmured, as his eyes glazed with lust.

There it was – a moment written in all of the grand romantic adventures, a magnificent affirmation of fondness between the two enamored human beings.

He closed the distance between our bodies, roughly pressing his lips against mine. His thumb pulled at my lower lip, demanding an entrance. I felt his tongue force its way past my barely parted lips. The alcohol in his breath was downright revolting, his fingers pressed into a harsh bruising grip against my sensitive skin.

I waited for the feelings Bonnie and Alison had described to rush over me. And waited some more.

Eventually he realized I had stopped returning his kiss. “Ashlyn?” He stepped away from me, griping my shoulders. “What is wrong?”

I was left utterly confused. There was no heat and no grand fireworks in my belly. Simply – nothing. Was there something wrong with me? But I loved Jared so much.

“Nothing,” I answered hurriedly. “It’s just, this was my first kiss,” I blushed under his scrutinizing gaze.

The lack of emotions was surely my fault as I haven’t got the slightest idea what to do with my lips.

“Oh! Have I disappointed you somehow?” His fingers squeezed my shoulders to wake me from my dazed state.

“No! It was nice…” I lied.

“Ashlyn, you have to understand something,” Jared’s hands slipped down my arms. “I am so grateful for your feelings,” he raised my hand to gently kiss my knuckles.

He is grateful?

“But I am not certain if I can return them. And even if I could, I cannot marry you. I am so sorry,” he admitted with saddened expression. “I need money.”

“I understand Jared. I realize the difficulty of our situation.”

“If I could change things, I would,” he brought me closer to place a kiss on my forehead. “Things are so complicated right now. I must admit my feelings are divided,” he stepped toward the opened window. The light evening breeze shuffled his blonde hair.

“What do you mean?”

“I think about you a lot, but I can't get Bonnie out of my head either.”

His admission saddened me deeply, but I wasn’t surprised to hear this.

“I am so sorry,” he once again tried to pull me close, but I evaded his extended arms.

“I should go back; otherwise people will start talking.” This didn’t turn out the way I’ve always dreamed it would. I felt hurt and confused. Tears burned in my eyes and I turned away so he wouldn’t notice my distress.

“Ashlyn…” He said softly. “Please.”

“It’s all right, Jared. Really. I’ll go in first. Wait here for additional five minutes, then you can join me.”

With that I left him behind, still standing in the hallway with broken expression frozen on his face.