With tears in my eyes and barking canine laughter in my ears, I full on sprint away from the pack's territory. I guess that since I didn't really fight, it doesn't count as a defeat, as the alpha didn't try to stop me. I have little doubt that he could have, after all.

Soon shame falls away and is replaced with pure, blind rage. I shout every not quite expletive that I know, which in fairness, isn't all that many. How could he do that? And how could I just run away? Aren't I willing to give everything for my mission? Darn it, why couldn't he have just insisted on killing me?

No, no, that wouldn't have helped either. I need to save my master. I can't afford to die here. I'm lucky that he didn't kill me, and instead he just wanted... he just wanted... I shudder, and can't stop shivering until my whole body aches. I should have stood and fought!

But that's not true, is it? The difference in strength is still too great. Far too great. I need to get stronger! I need to find and kill more powerful monsters! I need to... I need to...

I slow to a trot as I finally reach the outskirts of the village, looking in at the people wandering about. So many surely kind and wonderful humans. So many of which are visibly in need. I can't help but sigh deeply as, all at once, all of my anger and frustration melts away.

What am I doing? Since when have I been obsessed with killing and obtaining power? When did that become the only thing that mattered?

"You need more power to protect your owner. That's the important thing." I think to myself.

No, no it's not, of course. Yeah, he might need help, but there are others who need help, too. Other people who I ignored because I was so obsessed with strength and experience levels.

"You only wanted that power to help your master." my inner voice replies.

No, that's not true either, is it? Not entirely true, at least. Sure, I did and still do want to complete my mission, to find my owner as soon as I possibly can, but there was more to it than that. A part of me, a far larger part than I would like to admit wanted something else: I wanted revenge. I wanted to win. I wanted to defeat my enemy, not for the sake of anyone else, but purely for myself. I sigh and flop down on the grass, closing my eyes. I'm just the worst.

You might be reading a pirated copy. Look for the official release to support the author.

Almost immediately, however, I hop back up to my feet, my mind suddenly clear. No, I'm not the worst. Well, okay, yes, maybe I am, but that hardly matters. If I have time to lie here feeling guilty, I should spend that time making things right. I can feel bad later. For now, there is an entire village of people here who need my help!

"And what about the wolves? What about your journey?"

I'll figure something out. Who knows? Maybe I'll get a quest reward which will help! No, no, that's the sort of selfish thinking that got me into this mess. The sorts of thoughts that are unfitting for a noble paladin. For now, what I want doesn't matter. There are people in need here, and helping them is the only thing matters. Even if doing so brings me no closer to solving my dilemma, charity is its own reward, and after spending a downright disgusting amount of time focused on violence and gaining strength, I could really use the karmic cleanse which can only be gained from doing good deeds purely for their own sake.

---

Forest Deer: ...

Squire: "I'm sorry... I know it was wrong, but I just got so caught up on winning my fight that I took out my frustrations on you guys, and got blinded by the experience point rewards."

Forest Rabbit: ...

Squire: "It won't happen again, I promise!"

Forest Kiwi: ...

Squire: "Oh, come on! Don't be like that!"

Forest Squirrel: ...

Squire: "You guys have been trying to instantly murder me on sight! You have no right to judge me!"

Red Slime: ...

Squire: "No, no, you're right, this is a 'me' issue, and I have no right to throw it back at you. Is there any way that you can forgive me?"

Forest Monsters: ...

Squire has suffered 1 point(s) of damage!

Squire has suffered 1 point(s) of damage!

Squire has suffered 1 point(s) of damage!

Squire has suffered 1 point(s) of damage!

Squire: "Seriously?"

Squire uses Divine Strike! Forest Deer suffers 325 point(s) of damage! Forest Deer is defeated! Forest Rabbit suffers 400 point(s) of damage! Forest Rabbit is defeated! Forest Kiwi suffers 286 point(s) of damage! Forest Kiwi is defeated! Red Slime suffers 397 point(s) of damage! Red Slime is defeated!

Squire: "Honestly, I don't know why I expected that to work."