The Tower had first been built by William the Conqueror at the end of the 11th century. It was most famously used as a prison for royal hostages but in the 12th it was still being used as a Palace for the King of England.
Knowing that still didn’t make me feel any better about going there. For all I know this was more about my little romp with the Knight my first day in the 12th. Or the guilds could be using the State to take me down instead of doing it themselves.
I approached the gate of the Tower and was greeted by two guards. You could tell they weren’t there to direct tourists. They were protecting the King so they were probably the best fighters in the whole of England. So making funny faces at them and trying to take the hats might not be such a good idea.
“State your Business”
“I’m Arthur Collins. I was summoned.” I said
After looking at each other one of them left and walked back to the Tower. As I was waiting for him to return I couldn’t help but admire the Tower. It was a relatively new construction only being built 3 decades before.
In a few minutes the Guards returned and they let me pass. I was escorted by the Guards to what appeared to be the throne room. The bloody King of England Henry I son of William the Conqueror was waiting for me. He was broad shouldered and about 5’9” with reddish hair that showed his age as it was mostly grey.
I don’t know maybe it’s just the nerd in me but meeting the King of England was pretty freaking cool. It also was scary as hell I had to watch myself or I could end up 10 lbs lighter all of a sudden. Fun Fact: average Human Head weighs 10 lbs.
What’s better was that the Empress Matilda was there as well. You know how I said 10’s were unicorns? Well alert the media because I found a unicorn. Even in a world with little to no makeup she was a knockout. The history books really did not do her justice.
She was about a half foot shorter than her father and she had the most beautiful dirty blonde hair down to her back. She also had a set of knockers that would make a porn star jealous.
Matilda was like all princesses she had no free will at all and was married off twice for political gains. The first time while only 8 (they start them off early here) to a man that didn’t even speak her language. According to Agatha she had just been widowed early this year. The other was supposed to be Geoffrey of Anjou (the eventual Count of Anjou) but that hadn’t happened yet obviously.
It got so bad in that marriage that they almost had a divorce which was a huge sin in those days. They never did like each other but they did sire the eventual King Henry II. She then molded him to become one of the most successful Kings (at least in their eyes) since William.
She also was the Lady of the English (Queen) for about a minute before losing the crown back to her cousin Stephen of Blios.
“Are you this Arthur Collins everyone in my Kingdom is talking about?” King Henry said as I approached his throne.
“I am your Majesty” I said while bowing at the waste.
I had been told I must prostrate myself in front of the King but me being a stubborn freedom loving American, I’d rather have my freaking head chopped off.
“Why do you not kneel before me?” He asked.
“Where I come from we kneel before no man, Sir. In America a bow is the deepest sign of respect just as a handshake is the deepest sign of equality, your Majesty” I said hoping I would keep my head.
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“Hah, did you hear that? This man has spirit. I like him.” He said and I almost exhaled a ‘Whew’ but contained it.
It seemed that the Empress didn’t mind me either.
“Oh damn.” I said under my breath.
I had just realized that she was checking me out and wasn’t being discreet about it. I must be the biggest man she’s ever seen and I’m not exactly ugly. In fact compared to my competition I have met since I got here in the 12th I’m a regular Stud. No broken nose or scars on my face or anything.
The man standing in the corner wasn’t nearly as accepting. If looks could kill I wouldn’t be breathing. The kings saw where my gaze was.
“Oh don’t mind him that’s my Sister’s Son, Stephen of Blois. He’s such a stick in the mud.” Funny that saying goes back this far.
Stephen ah hell, the future Usurper in the Flesh I thought. He caused the Anarchy by seizing power after Henry died even after swearing to serve Matilda whom Henry had chosen to succeed him.
Stephen was like all men in the Middle Ages it would seem. Short and barrel chested.
“So they tell me you swam the length of the English Channel. You can dispatch a Knight unarmed. That you rebuild church roofs for fun. They also say you have a device that spews fire like a Dragon.” The King said making a strange movement with his arms that I guess he thought looked like spewing fire.
“I have also heard of books that have images with colors and things that have never been seen. I even have complaints from the Builders Guilds that you use building magic with which you can construct a house in half the time. Not to mention you’re supposedly a giant over 2 yards high but I can see that was not exaggerated. So Arthur Collins are you a warlock, a witch, or an Angel sent from God?”
“Your Majesty, all those things are possible where I come from without magic. Just as it is possible to construct such a fine castle like your father built here without magic. It just takes knowledge.
I owe Father Clarence a great deal and the church desperately needed a new roof. As far as swimming the English Channel I would have to plead ignorance for I do not know how far I swam after my ship was lost or where it even was when it was lost. All I know was it was long enough.”
He laughed at that and then continued. “You must know I think talk of magic is foolishness best left to the fool minded like some in the Church. I just asked because the Church asked me to investigate.
I am however less willing to overlook your maiming Sir Durant. Even though he is an insufferable ass and I’m glad you put him in his place I can’t have peasants defeating Knights it sets a bad example. Were you a Knight in this America?”
“We had no Knights where I come from but I was a warrior of equal status to your Knights in my country. The swift takedown of your Sir Durant should attest to my prowess in battle, your Majesty.” I was lying through my teeth of course. One year of ROTC does not a warrior make.
I continued “If you think what I have done so far is amazing I assure you it is a drop in the bucket for what I can do for you, your majesty.”
He sat there digesting this bit of information and then said.
“Well I guess the only solution is to Knight you.”
“Sir you mustn’t he is not of noble blood and ….”
“You must hold your tongue Stephen or I shall remove it! It is the only option for he could be far too valuable to just kill him.”
“Yes my liege”
Apparently I had impressed King Henry or someone that had pulled with him. He was going to Knight me to save face for kicking his man’s ass. But why was Stephen so opposed to it? I assumed it was racism (or is the correct term classism).
“Now the problem Arthur Collins, is that you must kneel in order for me Knight you.”
“I can make an exception for this ceremony once, your Majesty. To show my allegiance to you but I’d ask that you never force me to kneel again.” I said kneeling before him.
“Demanding considerations from a King how preposterous.” Stephen Said.
“Silence! I like his spirit. I will try to keep that in mind Arthur as long as you keep in mind your oath of fealty.” the King said.
“I dub thee Sir Arthur.” the King said as he tapped (more like hitting these swords are heavy) my shoulders one at a time.
And then he did hit me. A backhand right across the face. I started to lose my cool and my facial expression must have shown it. The King visibly was startled before he continued.
“That is the last strike you will ever take without striking back. Arise Sir Arthur.”
If only Mom could see me now I’m a Knight.