I pick myself up off the floor and drag myself into bed. My ankle throbs as I curl into a ball, tucking my injured hand and wrist to my chest. I can’t stop the tears as I silently curse Haden. Being around him has made me feel little, immature, and so fucking angry. Yesterday with Kane had felt like a nightmare, but now I see how much I’d rather him around than anyone else.
I eventually cry myself to sleep and only wake up when someone gently nudges me. I roll over onto my back to find Kane looming over me. He lets go of my shoulder and straightens up, clearing his throat.
“I’ve prepared dinner so come down when you’re ready.” He leaves as I rub the sleep from my eyes and assess the damage that’s been done to me today. My ankle hurts more than before and I hope it’s just a twist and not something that needs treatment.
I hobble into the living room, using both my prosthetic and crutches. When Kane sees me come in, his eyes widen and he stands abruptly, knocking his chair over. He appears directly in front of me before the chair even hits the ground, gripping my arms and steering me backward towards the couch. My feet are barely touching the floor by the time he sits me down.
“What happened?” I can feel his eyes on me, scanning me. He grabs my hand and the pressure on my wrist makes me hiss.
“What’s that?” His eyes trained on the hand he’s now cradling gingerly.
“I cut my hand and I twisted my wrist.”
“How?” He’s examining the bandage as if he can see through it to the wound beneath.
“I was startled by Haden and I..”
He cuts me off, “Haden did this to you?” His voice is icy as he spits out the question. In the months that I’ve known Kane, his tone rarely changes, much less his expression. But, right now he looks downright hostile.
“No!” I shout, pulling away. “He frightened me and I fell and hurt myself.”
“Is that why you’re limping, too?”
That was more Haden’s fault than the cut but I’m pretty sure if I admit that he’ll storm off, at least given the way he’s now eyeing the back door.
“Yes,” I say with a nod. “I fell and a mug broke. That’s how I got hurt,” I explain calmly. Then, I think about how none of this would have happened if Haden hadn’t been there in the first place and I shouldn’t have to cover for the asshole even if it is to avoid further issues.
“Actually,” I pull my hand out of his grip, “why the hell would you leave me with someone who hates humans?”
Kane’s gaze falls back to me and though he still has a stony expression, I know it’s not directed at me. “I was unaware that he would be assigned to your care.”
“And all this about ‘the Alpha and I are of one mind’ bullshit?” I ask, using air quotes with my good hand. “I really wish you’d pick a side and stick with it, you know.”
I want to go back upstairs and sleep again. My head is starting to ache and I’m not even hungry.
“I feel like a broken record. I don’t want to deal with you blowing hot and cold.” I extract my hand from his and get up.
He avoids my injured hand and wrist and instead grabs hold of my elbow, still on his knees. When I look down at him, he’s still staring ahead at the couch.
“I don’t know what’s the best way forward. I haven’t had a human in my care in decades.” His voice is soft but I can hear every word clearly.
“I don’t want to be in your care. If I… If I swore to never tell anyone, couldn’t you just let me leave?”
“Ama, I’ve already explained that if we were to let you go it would just be to another pack where humans are kept.”
“Why can’t I just go?” My voice has gone high and whiny. He’s still holding onto my sleeve and not looking at me.
I tug away from him and he finally shifts, on his knees, to face me. He doesn’t stand and our position makes me feel like he’s kneeling in front of me - it’s an odd power dynamic.
“When humans are taken, it’s because they’ve been exposed to us, the real us. They become servants or slaves. We don’t just take humans, they must see or participate in shifter activities. They are taken to keep word from getting out. There would be hell if anyone found out we had just let one go. It wouldn’t only impact this pack but all packs across the world.”
This novel's true home is a different platform. Support the author by finding it there.
I’m not particularly surprised by the answer. I had pieced that much together on my own over the past few months. As he looks up at me, I feel the annoying pull I’ve started to get used to and wonder if it would just be easier to give in than to keep fighting. I keep promising myself that I’ll fuck them all over somehow, someday. But, it would be so much easier to just let go.
“When you left yesterday, I decided that it’d just be easier to hate you, Kane. But I’m tired. Really fucking tired. And there are already enough people on my shit list here so can I not?” I pause, biting my lip. “Remember when we talked at the lake or in the laundry room? Can you be that guy again?”
“I can try,” he offers and I decide that that will have to do.
Kane stands and helps me to the table and we eat in amicable silence. I’m almost certain his whole personality is going to shift again on a dime but at least I’m relatively prepared for it now.
I watch him as he takes my plate and retreats into the kitchen. I can hear the sink as he washes the dish and leans back in my chair. If I close my eyes, the sounds of domestic life almost make it believable that I’m back home.
I wonder how Cassidy and Henry are doing. They had gotten along just fine without me before and they are family, after all. But, I could admit, if only to myself, that I’d enjoyed working with Henry and Cassidy, and Mira had been nice to be around.
Out of the corner of my eye, I see Kane stop and lean on the door frame. He crosses his arms across his broad chest and watches me without speaking.
I sit up straight and clear my throat. Since I’m not sure how long this truce will last, I decide I might as well find out more about him and the others while I can. “Could you tell me something about your life? Something not horribly depressing please,” I ask with a smile.
He arches a brow at the last part and I struggle to keep the smile on my face. Can he see that I’m being a sneaky try-hard?
“Very well. It’s not humorous but something that comes to mind is when I met Alpha. Every few years all the packs in the country convene. It’s each pack's leaders or delegates. There’s a lot of drinking, fucking, partying, and a bit of business done at the conference.”
I snort at the description. “It sounds like Burning Man.”
“Not sure what that is, but perhaps. I had left my father’s pack and had not yet aligned myself with another. Shifters without packs are not generally allowed on pack lands without an invitation. I was living with a small pack that did not have many males so they allowed me to stay. Through a series of odd occurrences, I ended up being the one to guard their Alpha’s wife during the conference. There I met our Alpha’s father and, of course, Alpha.”
“How long ago are we talking?” I ask, as a turn sideways in my chair to get comfortable. I tuck my leg under me and lean back on the armrest.
“A while. Alpha was just a scrawny teenager.”
“That’s a bit hard to picture.” I then think about the fact that I’m almost 100% sure they are in a relationship. It must be a May-December type thing then.
“So you’re a bit older than he is, then?” I ask, hoping it seems nonchalant.
“Yes, about thirty years. Why do you ask?”
My eyes dart away as I reply, “No reason.” I know that’s a tell-tale sign of lying but I can’t stop myself in time.
I can feel the weight of his stare as he tries to determine why I’ve asked. “Well, he was quite young then and incredibly reckless. He almost got both of us killed. Though, that is why I ended up swearing allegiance to him and joining his pack.”
My eyes widen as he casually mentions yet another near-death experience as if it’s the weather and doesn’t bother to go into detail.
“Well?!” I push, “Was that supposed to be the story?”
Kane shrugs, “Well, as I mentioned he was young and young Shifters are known for being impulsive. Whenever there are large pack gatherings, it attracts Rogue Shifters. There’s always a border portal but it’s not impenetrable. Rouge Shifters tend to actually be stronger than Pack Shifters. They spend a lot more time outside of their human body. It’s a double-edged sword. Their animal form is significantly more powerful but they tend to lose their human sensibilities.”
“So they’re just animals?”
“Aren’t we all?” he muses and I think about if it’s worth it to lean over and try to smack him. This more playful side of him might be just as annoying as the stoic side.
He continues, “A few rogues did get past the petrol and Liam was desperate to prove himself to his father. He went off on his own. Luckily, I wasn't far behind. I was already patrolling close to the breach and was called for support. I was the first to arrive right as he engaged them. He did well for a kid but he would have died on his own. To be fair, even with my help we both still wouldn’t have made it. But, we held on long enough for more to arrive.”
“And that made you decide to join him? And wait, Liam?”
Kane’s eyes flit away and he sighs, “The Alpha of this pack’s name is Liam. But he would not appreciate you using it to address him.”
I nod and file that information away. I don’t want to provoke Alpha, but you never know when it might come in handy.
“In retrospect, it may have been a rushed decision but I saw a future Alpha that would fight for his pack and I wanted that for myself.” He straightens and rolls his shoulders back, stretching.
I can’t say much back to that since I don’t really get their whole pack mentality. But I guess it’s nice to have someone with you who you know has your back. “And you’ve been together since?”
Maybe the phrasing is too obvious because his expression hardens as he replies, “I am aware of what you saw, but don’t misinterpret it. The Alpha has a mate.”
Haden had just given me quite the lesson on mates so I know that it’s a very meaningful bond. But if it’s so significant, how can Alpha do something with someone else? And if he has a mate why didn’t I ever see her with him when I lived in the packhouse?
There are so many questions I want to ask but his expression is so guarded now that I know this is not a subject he’s willing to discuss any further.
I drop it and ask him if he’s read anything else since the laundry room. And as we continue talking about books, he slowly relaxes back into comfortable conversation.