One more.
Kaitlyn hunched over her bench, pipette in one hand and a tube in the other. Her red-rimmed eyes focused intently on her work.
I’ve got time for just one more. Come on.
The windows had long since darkened, leaving only the faint light of the moon illuminating the sidewalks below. Even the automatic lights of the other labs down the hall had dimmed, indicating their own inhabitants had long since left.
Carefully, she snapped the lid back onto her tube and plucked out the next. Ok. Once I finish these dilutions, I’ll have a better idea of the best concentrations to use in the future. Easy. I’ve got time.
A glance up at the clock seemed to confirm the thought. It wasn’t even midnight yet. Plenty of time. Heck, she might even be able to finish up one or two more lingering tasks on her list.
It’s going to take so much time to get to this point again. Best if I just take advantage now.
Her hand reached for the next tube, and then the next, transferring liquid between them with well-practiced motions. She had to get something useable out of this loop besides technique. Something actionable. Something final.
While the dreaded qPCR had eluded her, she’d gotten plenty of technique practice on other assays. Unfortunately, some of them proved to be a bit of a mixed bag as well. Root length assays and genotyping were easy enough, but everything else always seemed to require more work than initially assumed, even once she felt comfortable with them. Whether that meant troubleshooting, dialing in conditions, or just getting even better technique down. Western blots in particular were a whole other can of worms. Those would take a few loops to master from start to finish, in all likelihood.
But that’s ok. I have time. Not just today, but in the future.
Kaitlyn reached for the last tube, pressing the plunger on her pipette to dispense a bit of water into it. The stream froze in midair.
What the…?
Her eyes darted about in panicked confusion before coming to rest on the clock. It was midnight.
Wait, already? I haven’t even finished yet! I need a bit more time to–
Before she could even finish the thought, her vision went dark.
***
Cycle 25 Complete!
Ending: Under the Radar
Total Endings Unlocked: 6
***
Sunlight peeked through from behind Kaitlyn’s closed eyelids. She muttered darkly and groaned, rubbing her face in frustration.
Dangit! Now I have to start all over again. I just needed a little more time there, then I would’ve saved at least a week…
With a deep breath, she calmed herself and sat up. It’s ok. It’s fine. It’s already done. I just have to do it again, that’s all. I’ve got plenty of time anyway. And now I know for certain a ton of things that WON’T work, so I just have to keep going until I find things that do. That’s it.
Rolling out of bed, she began her normal morning routine, mind still abuzz with thoughts about her next experiment. New leads and possibilities whirled about in a constant maelstrom of activity. But before she could make it far, she came to a sudden halt before her mirror.
Kaitlyn took in her familiar figure, still clad in pajamas. Her body had reset, as usual. But her brow was already creased in a deep frown of concentration, stress, and… was that anger?
Her reflection blinked in confusion. Is that… me?
With an effort, she smoothed over her expression. When that only partially fixed the problem, she closed her eyes and took a few deep, calming breaths. When they opened once more, her reflection looked far more relaxed.
Woah. I didn’t even realize. The sight had rattled her. If I’ve been glaring like that all loop, then no wonder Christa was worried. I’m shocked anyone even talked to me.
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She bit her lip. Her first instinct was to get back in there, go forward, and finish what she’d started. But maybe, just maybe, the postdoc had a point. Maybe she needed a break.
…I did work pretty hard, there. Her mind went back to the later-than-advisable nights she’d regularly pulled near the end of the loop. Maybe I went a bit too far. Maybe putting all my eggs in one basket wasn’t such a good idea.
Kaitlyn tried to look back on the last loop a bit more objectively. Sure enough, she began to see a rather disturbing image emerge. An image of an obsessed girl throwing herself too hard into her work.
It was only one loop though! She argued with herself, whirling toward the dresser to retrieve some clothes. I was so good on all the other loops. I just wanted to try something new and it backfired. That’s all.
An unpleasant counterpoint bubbled to the surface. Had she really been good? Or had she been keeping herself busy and distracted then, too?
It was the issue she had been steadfastly avoiding over all these loops, she realized. The issue of turning a blind eye to endings. To avoiding the issue.
I… I thought I was ready to try. She grimaced, pulling a shirt over her head. And I did. I did try with classes and people and so many things. But I wasn’t really ready, was I? That’s why I did all that. I took the distractions, but how many times have I really thought about figuring out my feelings?
She rubbed her face tiredly. The realization took the wind completely out of her sails. Shoot. I knew I was avoiding this, but is that really what I’ve been doing? Just… looking the other way?
It wasn’t all bad, she reassured herself. Learning classes and all the skills she’d developed were nothing to scoff at. They were actual achievements that she could be proud of. But now, the entire process took on a bit of a darker tone.
Apparently, I’ve got more issues than I realized.
Heading to the bathroom, Kaitlyn mulled over what this meant for her future. She could simply ignore this little epiphany and continue throwing herself at lab anyway. After all, she hadn’t put too much time into it yet, and the place had a lot of potential to teach her. Not to mention that she didn’t feel like giving up.
Yet… that spurred another thought - what even was her end goal for lab? What was the point?
To finish my project, of course. What else? To run through all the assays in one fell swoop and get the whole thing taken care of. She frowned. Though… we did end up adding other stuff to the project after the couple of experiments that did work. So maybe that isn’t even a good thing to go for.
There had been a certain satisfaction to classes, with their concrete requirements and achievable numerical goals. But here, the majority of what she’d encountered on becoming independent was just frustration. Especially with the more troublesome assays. The key ones for her project, of course.
A hiss of air escaped from between her teeth. Well, one thing’s for certain at least. I’m not getting anywhere soon with my archnemesis. Maybe… I do need to take a break like Christa suggested. Get some distance, come at it with a fresh perspective some other day.
It felt like admitting defeat, but Kaitlyn chastised herself for the thought. It wasn’t giving up. It was just being smart. She’d be back.
With a final nod, she solidified her resolve. No more lab for a little while. At all.
Then… that means I’m back to the problem I started with. What do I do with all this free time?
The whispering voice in the corner of her mind reared its ugly head once again. If she insisted on obsessing over something, it said, she might as well obsess over endings. Something that she’d need to do eventually.
She shoved the thought back down. I’m not going to obsess. Nope. I’m just taking advantage of the time loop. Why shouldn’t I try to learn more things?
Kaitlyn scowled as she brushed her teeth. I might not be ready for endings yet, but… maybe I need to try and move that direction. At least a bit. I can just… build that skill toolbox that I was talking about. Yeah. That’s a better idea. I get to learn something new, and it feels like I’m kind of making progress toward an ending too. Best of both worlds.
Satisfied with the compromise, she thought through the list of guys and their interests. Philip was a tutor and server at Chella’s. Elliot did music and lab, as far as she knew. Ian had Bash Bros. and game design. While Vinny… well, Vinny could drink. And liked cats.
Aside from continuing to learn cooking from Scarra, she’d pretty much peaked on Philip’s associated skillsets, and she wasn’t touching lab anytime soon. Bash Bros. was a promising option, but it would require hanging out with Ian frequently again. Something she’d also been avoiding, outside of tournaments.
That just leaves music and game design. And drinking, I guess. The thought made her chuckle. I could definitely get better at drinking, but somehow I don’t think that’ll be the most helpful thing for anyone. I’ve never touched an instrument or programmed before, either. Maybe I can start doing both?
Stepping back into her dorm, the plan seemed reasonable enough. There was just one problem - money. Buying a laptop, never mind an instrument on top of that? A quick search on her phone confirmed those suspicions. This wouldn’t be cheap.
Luckily, a grin crept onto her face, I distinctly remember Heather offering a business opportunity before I went on my little lab detour… Maybe it’s time to look into that a bit more.
A knock sounded at the door, startling Kaitlyn. She’d apparently managed to summon her roommate via telepathy alone. That, or she’d simply lost track of time. Probably the first one though.
With a roll of her shoulders, Kaitlyn stepped toward the door to introduce herself once again.