“Could you stop wheezing for one second?!” Miku snapped, waving her hands frantically at the celestial curled up on the plush chair in front of her. “You're glowing! Why are you glowing?!”
“I DON'T KNOW!” Seiji barked, his voice three octaves higher than usual. His golden eyes were wild, his perfect hair was slightly frazzled, and—most horrifying of all—his stomach was emitting an ominous, pulsing light.
“Oh no, oh no, oh no,” Miku muttered, pacing back and forth like she was trying to wear a trench in the stone floor. “What if you're about to explode? What if this world has rules like alien movies?!”
Seiji's head shot up, his pupils shrinking to pinpricks. “Explode?!”
“I don’t know! Do pregnant celestials explode?!”
“I HAVE NEVER BEEN PREGNANT BEFORE!”
“Well, maybe you should’ve thought about that before pointing a sword at me!”
The celestial groaned, leaning back dramatically like he was in a tragic play. “This is worse than eternal damnation. This is worse than when I had to fight the Demon Lord. THIS IS WORSE THAN—OH, GREAT COSMOS, WHAT WAS THAT?!”
Miku’s head snapped up. “What was what?!”
“That... movement!” He clutched his glowing stomach with both hands, his voice tinged with the kind of terror only a godly being could muster. “Something just—moved inside me!”
“Nope, nope, nope!” she shouted, backing away like his glowing belly might sprout teeth and bite her. “I don’t want to know what’s in there! Keep it to yourself!”
“You did this!” he yelled, pointing an accusatory finger at her. “This is YOUR fault!”
“Oh, I'm sorry, did I ask to be summoned here? Did I ask for glowing magic pregnancy cards to pop out of nowhere?!” She threw her hands up. “No! I didn’t even want to get out of bed this morning!”
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Seiji opened his mouth to argue, but before he could say another word, the door slammed open.
“Lady Miku!”
Miku froze mid-panic. Who—?
A man clad in ridiculously shiny armor burst into the room, a heroic grin plastered on his face and a sword already drawn. His entrance was so dramatic that Miku half-expected a fanfare of trumpets to follow.
“I heard shouting! Are you in danger?!” the knight bellowed, posing like he was ready to take on a dragon.
“Who are you?!” Miku blurted.
The knight looked genuinely surprised that she didn’t know him. “I am Kaito Aoyama, sworn protector of the kingdom! And you, Lady Miku, are clearly in need of my assistance!”
“Lady—what now?” Miku stared at him, completely baffled. “I’ve never even met you!”
“Of course you haven’t!” Kaito said proudly, as if that made perfect sense. “I was assigned to you by the king himself. You are under my protection from this moment forward!”
“I don’t need protection!”
“Yes, you do.”
“No, I don’t!”
“Yes, you do,” he repeated firmly, pointing his sword toward Seiji. “Because clearly, this guy is a threat.”
Seiji, who had been watching the exchange with increasing irritation, finally snapped. “I am not a threat, you armor-clad buffoon! I am a celestial—and pregnant, thanks to her!”
Kaito’s eyes widened. His gaze flicked to Seiji’s glowing stomach, then back to Miku, then back to the stomach again.
“...What do you mean... pregnant?”
“Exactly what it sounds like!” Seiji growled, gesturing dramatically at his abdomen. “Do I need to spell it out for you?!”
Kaito stared for a long moment before slowly sheathing his sword. “Well, this is... uh...” He cleared his throat. “Not the sort of situation they covered in knight training.”
“Gee, you think?!” Miku shouted, throwing her arms up in frustration.
Kaito, undeterred, turned back to her with his signature grin. “Don’t worry, Lady Miku. No matter how unusual the challenge, I will stand by your side!”
Miku buried her face in her hands. “I didn’t ask for this. I didn’t ask for any of this!”
Meanwhile, Seiji let out another pained groan, clutching his glowing belly. “Why are mortals so insufferable?”
Kaito puffed out his chest. “Don’t worry, celestial! I’ll help you, too!”
“Help me?” Seiji snapped, his golden eyes blazing. “Unless you can reverse magical pregnancies, get out of my sight!”
Kaito blinked. “...Magical pregnancies?”
“Yes!” Seiji and Miku yelled in unison.
The knight scratched his head, his grin faltering for the first time. “Huh. Well, that’s... new.”