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King Kaijobra

That fight was so boring. Now that I think about it, pretty much all my fights have been boring. There's just nothing strong enough to take me. Maybe I should go through that hole in the pacific and start merking aliens. Yeah, I'm gonna do that when I get too bored.

I miss my babies.

Right now I'm just flying around with no goal in mind. Earth is thanking me for not going on a genocide against the human race while I just ignore it. I noticed that the silk toga I made before is all ripped up and gross. I guess I could make another one.

OH SHIT I SHOULD'VE MADE SOME FOR REMY AND ARES!

My babies are naked on Mars! Ugh, I'll have to make them clothes when I see them again!

I suppose I could try helping this Earth recover from the kaiju, but honestly this earth feels too sassy.

Suddenly, I feel something strong appear at the breach. Like, stronger than ghidorah, godzilla, and big monke combined. This thing may be able to actually give me a run for my money, but I'm still stronger than it. I just won't be able to instantly kill it.

I guess the aliens are sending in their trump cards now that all the kaiju they've sent have been one tapped by me.

I fly over towards the breach south of China. I cut my signature as I get closer and wait for this thing to finally emerge from the giant pacific ocean. It seems to be headed towards Australia, so I'm guessing it wants to draw me out by going ape shit. Well, I'll just fly around it like a hawk.

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The thing finally comes out of the water. It's kind of like a snake with legs. Its head looks like a king cobra while its body is like a giant scorpion. It also has six legs. It has two claws at the front of its body with hooks on the ends. I'm guessing they want it to try to drown me.

Anyways, I wait for it to get on land which just so happens to be a human city. I can finally see its full size. It's easily 300 meters tall and at least 1000 meters long. But hey, the bigger they are the harder they fall!

I land in front of it with a thud, leveling a few buildings as I do.

The giant snake hisses at me as its legs lower its body down and its claws go out to the side and click.

I unfurl my wings and send a sonic screech its way. It falls back slightly and the hood on its neck closes slightly. Then, after the screech is over, its hood opens back up and starts vibrating as it hisses back.

A case of literary theft: this tale is not rightfully on Amazon; if you see it, report the violation.

Wow. Never thought something that could withstand my screech existed. I decide to send out a blast of atomic energy. It takes a second to warm up and slams into the snake. However, The snake's hood closes around its head and absorbs the impact, only being pushed back a few steps.

The snake opens its hood and smiles at me with a shit-eating grin. I guess this one is a little intelligent and thinks it knows how I fight. It starts running towards me and hisses loudly, vibrating the air around it. I stand in front of it unmoving and just let it run at me. When it was mere seconds from hitting me, I shot my arms out with the swords where my hands should be. The snake tries to stop as it sees the swords aimed at its neck. However, in truly cartoon fashion, It skids across the ground and slammed into my swords. The swords easily pierce through its hide and out the other side. I rip my arms out of its neck and switch back to my hands with three of my arms and the other stays a sword. I grab onto its hood and peck it directly in the face. My beak doesn't pierce its face, but does cause significant damage.

I'm easily able to hold onto its hood with my incredibly strong muscles. I breathe another atomic breath directly onto its face before it's finally able to slither out of my hands because I let it.

I guess nothing here is my true equal.

I slam my right fists into its face and stab it with my left arm. The sword cuts through the hood and shaves off the left side of it entirely. Its blood pours into the streets of wherever the fuck and starts sizzling the second it hits it. I ignore it and notice the cobra rearing back to bite. I coat my feathers in venom and turn myself bio-volcanic. It bites into me and actually manages to pierce my skin! Unfortunately for it, Warbats are much more venomous than this thing is. So, it may have managed to actually injure me for a few seconds before regeneration kicks in, and the venom does nothing to me. In fact, it boils away in my insides.

The snack rears back with burns all over its mouth. I spit a glob of venom mixed with silk into its mouth. The silk sticks to its throat and sends the venom down its throat. It thrashes about and tries to claw the silk out of its throat, but its claws were made so big that they couldn't get deep enough. It decides to ignore the feeling of stickiness in its throat and pain from the venom and just goes all out to attack me. It runs back towards me and slams into me, surprisingly managing to knock the wind out of me. I try to stand back up but it hits me in the beak with its claw, not bothering to clamp it on me.

This rocks my head, but doesn't manage to stun me as my entire body is a big brain. I send a punch at its face and stab it in the other hood and cut it off as well.

It successfully hitting me pissed me off.

I grab onto the gaping wounds caused by the missing hoods and dig my fingers into them. I replace the sword with a hand and dig it into the other side. I then pull and push both sides of the wound at the same time.

The snake screeches in pain as it feels its head being peeled in half. I keep pulling and pushing and eventually, something rips.

*SQUEEEEELCH*

Its head gets split in half as its skull is exposed. I pull its head down in front of me and aim directly at its skull. I send a full powered peck into the snake's skull and send an atomic breath into the hole I create, frying its brain.

I let the corpse fall to the ground and step on it. As a final taunting act, I face the sky where I assume the aliens were watching and let out a sonic screech louder than anything I've ever done before. Buildings collapse, cars are flung like toys, and any human near me is instantly turned into puddles and fertilizer. The call is heard all the way around the globe five times.

I take the corpse of the creature and fly over to Yellowstone. Time to get my home back.

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