Cleaning House
Absolution could only scream inside as he faced a room of panicking believers. Some shouted and begged for him to delay the apocalypse while others were starting to panic. With the room on the verge of descending into pandemonium, he had to act fast. Raising his hand, he assured them “No! There will be no apocalypse anytime soon. Not when you guys just got to the moon a few decades ago!”
He could only sigh in relief as their panic looks turned to one in relief. He should have really thought that one through, “I’m sending over an avatar,” he further clarified. Yes, he originally wanted to go down himself but that was something he couldn’t quite do personally thanks to his predecessor's promise. At least he could still feel things through said avatar; so he could in essence go out without actually ever leaving his throne.
Clapping his hands together and letting all emotions melt away from his face, he then continued, “As for why I’m sending an Avatar? I’m going to be honest. How you guys worship me is getting out of hand,” He paused for a bit, letting his followers digest his words before he pointed at a plain looking evangelist, “You! How many denominations are there?”
The man jumped in surprise as he stood up and tried to formulate a response only for his words to fail him. Thankfully, he managed to sputter out a response.“U-um, I’m not exactly sure my lord! Forgive me!” He apologized profusely as he became as white as a sheet.
Absolution stepped off his perch before patting the man’s shoulder and smiling at him. The man could only look back at him with slack jawed wonder as he plopped back on his seat, “See! You can’t even count them all!” He shouted as he looked around the room. He could barely keep track of every branch in the room.
“Just to be clear, I don’t think most of you are wrong with how you interpret my words but the context has changed. You guys aren’t really the same after nearly two thousand years. You came a long way,” he elaborated and praised them. From the memories he received from his predecessors, they had really changed which comes to no surprise as countless generations had passed ever since Abraham walked this very earth, “Like hell, I don’t have to look down and see entire cities being slaughtered in my name,” he joked.
Some of those that gathered looked away in shame while he gave them pointed looks behind the smile now grazing his face. Of course, there were rotten apples but that was about to change, especially with what he had planned, “As to why I didn’t come down to clarify things much earlier? I thought you’d fix it yourself. You’ve grown so much over the centuries and I don’t want you to rely on me for everything. I know it can suck at times but I want you to grow. Still, it was irresponsible of me to let this run for too long,” He then apologized. His predecessors had been hands off, choosing prophets; but with how fragmented the Abrahamic faith had become it was best to set things right personally.
“That point I’m making is, it's time that my word is updated. There are just some rules from the past that wouldn’t fly in this day in age. Please, just try to be reasonable and know that my words aren’t so strict as to be literal. There’s a reason and I want that reason to be clear for future worshippers.” He reasoned as he gazed upon the most traditional of his followers.
“In one week’s time, I want you to prepare for a great renewal. I want you to gather the greatest of your people and make things right,” He ordered as he returned back to his seat. If he was to save this world, he needed to clean house first. With all the corruption that had built up over the millennium, it was tempting to start with a clean slate; but he still believed there were still some pieces worth saving, thus he’d have his followers trim away the excess and pin down what it really meant to be his follower.
“We will not fail you my lord! We now see our failings and wish to atone,” His followers declared as they gazed up at him in repentance.
“Do know that I’m not scolding you for this, I’m merely guiding you back to the path that I have set but don’t think you’re off the hook just yet,~” He teased them yet the look of determination burning in their eye warmth his heart and made him smile; His faith in them was not misguided. They were good people, they just needed a little nudge in the right direction. He’d know since he was once one of them. His smile was short lived however as there was something he needed to address.
His gaze soon fell upon the current pope of the catholic church who fell to his knees, “Some of you have been very very naughty, like forcing the creation of a miracle. I will be punishing you; but my punishment won't be given out till our meeting in Mt. Sinai. I suggest you handle all your important matters before that, and don’t think of running away,” He stated before looking around and letting them all see his disappointment. Every last one of them had skeletons in their closet but that stopped now, “It’ll only make things worse,” he then warned them as a wide smile spread across his face. He half hoped that some of them would actually try running as hunting them down would be quite cathartic.
“I-I would like to step down as the successor to Saint Peter’s post. I-I have failed,” The Pope then whispered in his broken tone. He gazed down upon the floor as the weight of his sins seemingly aged him on the spot. The weariness and guilt in his eyes was almost painful to behold.
He could only smile wider as he replied, “Nope! I refuse!” After all, how can he deny clemency to those that were truly remorseful. He was the head of his flock, yet he accepted the fault as his own which showed his character. The guilt upon the man's shoulders was palpable, good. If he didn’t show any remorse then he would have struck him down.
“B-but!” The man blabbered in response as he looked at him in surprise. He could only snicker as the rest of his followers looked at him in surprise.
“No buts! I want you to make things right,” he replied not only to him but to every last person in this room. If they were really going to atone for their sins, they needed to fix their wrongs. They would find no peace if they were to remain unrepentant, that he promised to himself.
“I understand my lord,” The man replied reverently as he prostrated down in supplication before him.
“Up! I refuse to see my followers so humbled when they’re doing what's right,” he commanded him. He didn’t want them to self flagellate to the point that they never got things done. Humility was a virtue, but there was a point where it was too much.
The man wiped the tears off his face as he knelt up and bowed before going back to his seat. He let them have some respite to let their hearts settle. Their meetings were short but he still had some things to say. After a few minutes, he then continued, “Now, to two other matters. I might have lied there a bit as there was an apocalypse on the horizon, but it would not be by my hands.”
There were some gasps of surprise as his followers murmured among themselves. “If not by your hands, then who my lord?” A pastor from the midwest asked.
“Trihexa,” he uttered out and hush fell upon the room. Trihexa was sealed, yes, but they still remained active all this time. Their seal could be weakened if someone was dumb enough and, unfortunately for him, some were. Yes, his predecessor might have beaten that thing back then but it cost them dearly, enough so that there was a large delay between resurrection.
“Is the seal broken, my lord?” An imam asked fearfully. Even now, thousands of years in the future, the name of the beast still brings fear to the hearts of men.
“Thankfully, no. The seal is as strong as ever, but Trihexa is still a problem.” He reassured them.
“I could hold back Trihexia one more time but… it took a toll on me the last time I did it.” He admitted, refusing to elaborate any further. Anymore and he might make them panic like earlier.
Sighing in weariness, he then said, “The Beast has to be dealt with one way or another and I want you to prepare. We can’t keep kicking the can down the road and we must deal with this once and for all,” To seal the beast was a temporary measure at best. So long as it lives, the danger that they posed would forever hang upon their heads like a sword of Damocles. It only took one idiot to bring it crashing down upon them all.
“I will be creating a host to handle this creature and I want humanity to be there with me when the time comes. It might come next year or maybe even a century from now, but we will have to face Trihexa and we will win.” He then announced as he brought up his plan. He couldn’t do it alone and even if he wanted to keep this fight with just him and the angels, he doubted he could get strong enough to fight the beast in a reasonable time frame. He needed the help of not just humanity but everyone, which brought him to his next point.
“I also want to remind you that while I want you to strengthen yourself, I do not want you to be killhappy with other creatures if you can help it. Remember that you should use your heart and not just your mind when dealing judgment upon those who are not human.” He advised them as he then brought up the plan he had brewing up, “Do note that it wouldn’t be just humans and angels that I want in this host. This is a matter that the whole world is involved with and, thus, I’ll be gathering the help of all those who would join; even if they do not worship me as their god.”
As much as he wanted humanity to succeed, he did not want them to go down the path where they’re the only one that remains. He wanted them to remain compassionate even when faced with the prospect of having to live with those not of their species. Once upon a time, this would have been an impossible request, but now?
“If this is the will of the lord, then shall it be,” The Ecumenical Patriarch replied before the rest of the congregation affirmed their agreement. With how humanity was today, he could dare dream that such a reality could be possible.
“Sometimes, we just have to swallow our pride so that we can see your children smile without the looming threat of armageddon,” He uttered hopefully, pleading silently that they actually listen. The tiny steps heading to peace and harmony were rocky, but will be well worth it in the end.
Changing the subject, he then asked them, “Now, as some of you might have heard, I banned some Longinus wielders from my gift.” The nods that followed showed him how fast the news had spread. It had been only hours since he banned them yet almost everyone knew. Now, he needed to strike it while it was still hot, “I have judged them and I find that they pose quite a threat to the stability of the world. I’ve only banned three, with two being of immediate danger while the third is sealed temporarily.”
Banning the three was an easy decision to make. Yes, they were powerful, but the amount of chaos that they would cause far outweighed what they’d bring to the table. They needed to be dealt with and now he had his followers to listen to his words.
“Their goals might have been noble at first, but the methods and actions are detestable. More bans will be rolling out, but for now I’ll let them stew in the knowledge that their past actions are catching up to them,” He announced, letting the question on who they were hang in the air.
From the looks of some however, they already knew as some fidgeted where they stood and he knew who they were. There were people that funded them, people who helped them along and now he was to judge those they supported.
“Who might be these misguided fools?” Vasco Strada asked. While his face remained serene, the way his fist was clenched told otherwise and he pitied not the other cardinal that was close to fainting beside him.
“The Hero Faction,” he announced before the room exploded to curses and shouting. Those same people that supported the faction of fanatics either turned against them or tried their best to defend them to the best of their abilities. He raised his hands as he silenced them.
“Oh don’t be surprised. There are some good eggs there, but it has become rotten to its core. As such, I’m imposing upon them my judgment,” He hissed out as the memories of those they have wronged filtered through his mind. With their sacred gear as their witness, he found them lacking.
“For their crimes against humanity, I call upon my followers to destroy the Hero Faction. You shall root them out like farmers pull upon the weeds of the field for they have grown twisted and virulent. Their members are to be captured if possible and sentenced to death if they resist. To those that surrender or are captured I shall grant clemency. To those that fight, I shall give no mercy,” He declared, silencing the room as he imposed his will upon those who were clearly at fault. Truly, the road to hell was paved with good intentions. Some wept while others tried to flee but they soon found there was no way out as the door was blocked by Gabriel while their artifacts and abilities failed them.
“Raguel and Remiel, I want you to lead my flock in their fight against the Hero Faction. Make sure to separate the innocent and those that were forced to fight from your true targets.” He ordered them as the guilty would find chains wrapped around their wrists. The first of many to be judged were taken away with a flash, leaving extra leg room for the shaken occupants.
Taking in deep calming breaths, he let go of his anger as he smiled once more. ”Well, enough with the doom and gloom. I have one last thing I want to ask of you before I go,” He then said, with how much had happened in the past few minutes, he feared that any more announcements might prove to be too much for his followers. Glancing to Raphael, he nodded as his angel healed those inside and gave them back the years that he might have taken.
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“See, there’s this one being that I want to contact that would really help us in our future fight with Trihexa, but I might have pissed her off when I rang my bells a little too hard,” He chuckled nervously. He might have screwed the pooch when it comes to first impressions of this particular individual, but there was still hope.
“Please don’t tell us… you’re really considering asking the help of the Infinite Dragon?” Xenovia choked out from the back of the room.
“Bingo bongo! I actually need her help on this one. I need some volunteers to go seek her out. I know where she is, but I’d rather not get near her now. I want to avoid turning mountains into hills due to collateral damage.” He honestly replied, but he might have understated the amount of damage that could result from such a clash. Maybe continents getting shattered would be a more apt description of what could happen.
“So! Any Volunteers?” he then asked but was met with silence as the occupants of the room looked to their neighbors, waiting for someone to put their hands up. Was this that much of a suicide mission that his followers were second guessing?
“I’ll be your sword my Lord!” Thankfully, both Irina and Xenovia proved their faith and declared their intention.
“Great! I know I can count on you Irina. Now I just need a few more of you so I can get this little gift of mine and this invitation to her,” He replied as he gestured for them to come before him; Xenovia looking a bit down trodden as he didn’t say her name, but it was not yet her task.
He then reached out and plunged his hands in between into the dimensional gap. He was quick to grab what he could as he felt the great dragons gaze upon him, but he was out before they could even react. His followers flinched, with some crying out in pain, as they beheld Nothingness.
He was quick to bundle it up within a magical barrier before fashioning a protective and decorative frill. What he now had in his hand looked like a crystal ball, but in truth it held Nothing. “Remember, your life is much more important than this mission. If you think you're in any danger, drop the gift and run. I can make dozens more of these but I can only have one of you,” he reminded her, making the girl blush intensely as she took the sphere.
Turning to Xenovia who perked up and stood ramrod straight to hide the trembling in her limbs, he then said, “As for you Xenovia, I have another task for you…”
Before he could give her his task, a voice called out from beyond the seas, “God! I need help! My crazy ex-girlfriend wants to kill me!”
He felt ice fill his veins as he grabbed Xenovia who shouted in confusion before pushing her to the hand of a confused Archangel. “No time to explain! Michael, I want you to take her to Japan and save the Boosted Gear user! I’ll fill in Xenovia’s mission after you save him!”
Without so much as any hesitation, the loyal angel grabbed hold of a screaming Xenovia and flew away. While he could still feel Issei fighting on, he could also feel him slowly fading. It was now a race against the clock to see the boy saved before he could even start his journey.
-x-x-x-
Issei liked to believe he was a simple man with simple dreams. Yes, he was the wielder of a powerful divine artifact, or so Ddraig claims, but he was still an ordinary schoolboy at heart. He just wanted to have a harem so he grabbed on to the first opportunity to start his very own harem story. When he got to this date, even after all the warnings his partner gave him, he hoped that things would go great. He just had to believe in himself and give Yuuma the time of her life. Things shouldn’t have gone off the rails but here he was fending off his Ex? With nothing but his Boosted Gear and a stick.
“You! You fucking dick!” Yuuma growled out as she clutched her chest. He took a step back as the once sweet girl he shared coffee with earlier now gazed up at him with such hate, “You hit me in the boobs!” She screamed out in anger.
Well, yes, there was that but this was self defense! He barely had time to think as all those months being used as dodgeball targets by the Volleyball team allowed him to dodge the spear that plowed through the tree behind him, “You started it! Why did you have to go all psycho and try to stab me! I’m no longer looking at other girls damn it!” He screamed out as tears started streaming down his face.
“What the hell are you blabbering about?!” His beloved asked as another one of those spears made of light formed in her hands.
“BOOST!”
He felt his muscles scream when Yuuma launched herself at him. His hands moved and his stick struck true as it exploded into splinters after it hit the shaft of the spear that was about to plunge into his chest. He flinched as the spear grazed his shoulder but Yuuma shouted in surprise as she was sent off careening to the side. D-did he just parry her? He asked himself before the pain of forcing his body to move took its toll.
“Come on boy, don’t get distracted. As alluring as she is with her eight out of ten chest, she still tried to kill you. I can only give you so much until your body breaks!” His partner, Ddraig the Welsh Dragon, warned him as adrenaline and power coursed through his veins. He never felt so fantastic in his life and he was only at two boosts!
Still, Yuuma was still trying to kill him and he knew exactly why. Turning to his lover, he then shouted, “You are a yandere right?”
“W-what?” The girl stuttered as she picked herself up.
“I mean, the BDSM clothing kinda threw me off a bit but you definitely are one with the big ass sword,” He pointed out. It was the only reasonable explanation he could think of right now. There must have been something he did wrong, “What the hell did I do wrong! Just tell me so we can work things out!” he begged her, hoping to at least salvage the situation. Yes, she was a yandere but anything is fine for him if he was going to at least gain her love!
“W-what! I’m not a yandere! Don’t you dare call me that!” The girls sputtered out while he could hear Ddraig trying not to laugh at the back of his mind.
“A tsundere dominatrix then?” He then asked. Maybe he should have trusted his gut instinct earlier. This display of violence should just be her showing her affection right?
He could only cringe as Yuuma let out an ear piercing scream of anger before she threw herself at him again. He could only dodge this time around while Ddraig laughed at his misfortune. “Boy, you might not be the strongest partner I have had by a long shot, but you are by far the funniest one! Just look at her go!” His partner roared out as he dodged like his life depended on it, which it did right now. Still, he couldn’t help the perverted smile that stretched across face as his eyes watched the fallen angel's breast jiggle despite her sinfully tight outfit.
“You insufferable little hellion, I’m going to kill you!” She screamed out and it was then that his luck ran out. All it took was one hit, one hit and felt his ribs breaking and his spine nearly folding in half as Yuuma swiped at him with her spear.
He could only thank god that it was only the shaft that hit him and not the tip as he was launched against a nearby tree. He nearly blacked out as he started feeling numb. Even as he puked out blood, he felt nothing and that scared him more than anything else. Was this really it? Was this where his story ends?
“BOOST!”
He nearly lost hope until he felt his own hand slap against his cheeks. He blinked as reality started to come back into focus with the pain coming back in full force. It sucked, it sucked so bad, but it still didn’t beat the time when the football team descended on his crotch, “Don’t you dare give up! You’re my wielder so have some pride. Even in your pitiful state, you’re still standing up to her. Fight! Fight until you have nothing left to give!” His partner shouted as he started to move.
Yuuma laughed ever so cruelly as she walked up to him, her eyes lighting with sadistic joy as she licked her lips. No, he refused to give up now. He raised his gauntleted fist and struck at the ground. He refused to give up! He refused when the price was so much greater than his life.
“BOOST!”
“I won’t give up loving you!” He roared out to the heavens as he forced himself. Even as his legs shook beneath him, he powered through and forced himself to stand up straight. Even Yuuma was taken aback as she took a step back. Good, he was getting through her at least.
“Not what I was going for, but what the hell! Go for her kid! Beat her and then claim her!” Ddraig encouraged him even as he felt like he was being torn apart at the seams yet he held onto the love he had for Yuuma.
Yuuma sneered at him as she raised her spear once more, “Well too bad you’re going to die! It’s a shame that I can’t extract your Sacred Gear with God watching us more intently.” She growled out before he gave her that same smile she gave him when he first said yes. He felt his heart skip a bit only for it to shrivel up and die at the words she soon uttered, “If only you were a bit more cooperative then I would have just brought you over to Azazel-sama!”
He cried, cried out in agony as his love, stolen once more by someone probably good looking. “Fuck you and your sex cult! As kinky as it sounds, I do not want to get my ass fucked by some riajuu! Fucking netorare again!” He despaired as he fell down to his knees. He felt his heart shatter into thousands of tiny pieces and only his new found hate for a certain riajuu kept him together.
“Ouch. Even I feel that. Don’t worry partner, once you beat her, she’s technically yours,” His partner's reassuring words comforted him as Yuuma stared at him like he was some scum who needed to die.
“...She’s too fucking strong! I need help!” He mumbled out as he wiped the tears off his face. Even with everything he had, he was still in trouble. He needed someone to help him, someone who could turn to… “Wait, that’s it!” he shouted as he knelt down on his feet and begged.
“God! I need help! My crazy ex-girlfriend wants to kill me!” He prayed with all his heart.
“I’m not your ex-girlfriend!” Yuuma screeched out as her face twisted to that of rage, “And I’m totally sane! Saner than those bimbos clinging to Azazel-sama!” She raged on but it only made her look more deranged. He could only flinch back as the woman's eyes became unfocused before she went on a tirade.
“Would those bimbos go out into the field and actually get their hands dirty just for him?! No! They fucking wont! It’d just be me! Raynare!” She laughed, screaming at the sky and cursing her father for everything that had happened to her.
“Partner, I take what I said back. She’s crazy, wayyy too crazy. Her craziness just went past her hotness and it’s no longer looking fun. I won’t risk getting my dick sucked by that kind of crazy,” Ddraig whispered as he felt his lust for Yuuma dry up. Yes, he liked a certain level of crazy but she had reached crazy he had never seen until now.
He tried to move but he could only limp now with his torn muscles sending waves of pain up his spine with every movement he made. He needed to get up, hell, he just needed to crawl away, just anywhere but here especially now that Yuuma's attention was back on him. He cowered as she shouted, “Fucking die!”
Life flashed before his eyes as time seemed to slow down. He remembered the first time he laughed, the first time he cried and the first time he ever dreamed. ‘I’m sorry Oji-san, It looks like I’ll never achieve that dream after all,’ He whispered to himself as he closed his eyes and waited for the inevitable but it was not to be.
“No,” A powerful voice replied and Yuuma screamed out as she was tossed aside by an angel that had descended from the very heavens and blocked the killing blow. His jaw hung open as he beheld the six pairs of pure white wings upon the angels broad back.
“No way,” He whispered as he gazed upon the face of the angel before him and memories of his time with Irina flashed by his eyes. All those times Irina’s father entertained them with pictures of the various seraph came flooding back to his mind. He could still remember the stylized picture of the greatest of all of God's angels, the highest ranked among the Seraph.
“Who the hel-!” Yuuma growled out as she picked herself up only to choke out as she gaped at the man before him, “A-archangel Michael!”
“Ah Raynare, It’s been so long,” The Archangel greeted with a smile before he asked her, “How’s Azazel doing these days?”
That seemed to be a hot button topic for her as whatever fear she once had melted away as she hissed out, “Don’t you dare look down on me! Don’t you dare!”
“Oh thank god you're here. Please help me!” Whatever fear he had as well disappeared as god actually listened to his call like he told him he would. While he wasn’t a christian, he should probably visit his shrines and maybe give a donation.
“Worry not my child, for the lord has listened to your prayer.” The man whispered and he could feel the pain fades away as a golden glow spread across his body. “I do have a request for you however,” The angel then asked.
“Anything! Just keep me away from her!” He answered back.
“Can you please take care of her while I discipline my former junior? I’m unused to carrying mortals around and she might not be in the best of shape to fight.” The man replied as he turned and handed him a girl that took his breath away. She was just as beautiful as the beauties of his school and her striking blue hair, it was distracting enough that he almost didn’t notice how green she was in the gills.
“I think I’m going to hurl…” She wheezed out as she gagged. He hurriedly grabbed her and guided her to the nearest trash can.
“There’s a trash can you can use! Wait! Not now nooooo!” He despaired as the woman puked all over him. He could only cry as his nicest clothes were ruined even more. First they were torn up by Yuuma and now there was puke all over him? How was he going to explain things to his parents without coming off like he was hiding being a Yakuza!
“Now, Raynare, the Lord is merciful and has commanded me to spare you for now. You might have spurned our lord's guidance, but he still sees some good in you,” The Archangel said as he lifted up his spear at Yuuma.
“Leave now and tell your master that our Lord Father wants to meet with his prodigal children after he has unified the humans.” He warned her before he looked up at the treeline. Issei followed his gaze and found three other angels waiting up there. He felt his throat clamp up as he realized that even if he miraculously beat Yuuma, he would have to face three more of these black winged angels, “Do remember that I could still have your subordinates carry the message instead.”
“I hate you,” the woman hissed out before she and her friends fled from the scene. As the archangel lowered his spear, Issei would find the adrenaline coursing through his veins fade away. He stumbled as his vision darkened before he fell face forward as everything that had been keeping him together ebbed away. The last thing he saw was the woman he helped early catching him and trying to shake him awake.