Monday

8/11/25

Day came rapidly and incessantly, and both of us were far too unwilling to get out of bed after the night's ordeal. I had called out of work at some point before bed, citing the robbery, and Harley had also messaged her corporate client something to the same effect. So we just laid there, dozing in and out of sleep in each other's arms, until the hunger pains caught up to us. Forcing us back into the real world, to tackle our troubles head-on.

We worked quietly and solemnly in the kitchen, frying some eggs, and heating some frozen hash browns. It was around 3pm, far too late for breakfast, but we had little to no shits left to give. My mind was stuck in an endless cycle, repeating the violence over and over until I was so fucking numb that I couldn't speak. The image of the man kicking through the bedroom door followed by my swing, and endless splattered blood played in my head like the world's most fucked up GIF. I felt like a monster, I knew I was protecting myself and my partner, but a little part of me reveled in the violence of it. The sheer satisfaction of answering one transgression with another washed over me, and I enjoyed his screams of pain as I slammed the blunt weapon into his chest.

Did that make me a beast? No better than the ones who attempted violence on us? No idea... I was so beyond caring that it was shocking. I just went about my day like a philosophical zombie, desperate to let the monotonous rhythm wash my thoughts away. I washed dishes, checked my phone, cleaned the bedroom, checked my phone, did my skincare, checked my phone, found the fired bullet in a random wall, checked my phone, and resolved to let life and drugs drown out the flashbacks. It took hours, it took willpower, and it was endlessly painful, but the walls eventually went back up, and I became a functional person again.

Harley was not much better off, we hadn't spoken much all day, but I knew by the look in her eyes that she was also desperately trying to rebuild her own mental fortitude. We were both quite good at that, shutting away unhelpful thoughts was a skill, and it really helped in moments like these. Breaking down and succumbing to the trauma would resolve nothing. This required strength.

We got a call around nightfall on her phone from the police, and she put it on speaker as the officer proceeded to speak.

"Hello Harley?" The rough baritone voice on the other end sounded throughout the living room.

"Yup, Vi is here as well." She spoke curtly and without emotion.

"Good, just wanted to follow up, the injured perpetrator is still in the hospital, he's stable, but took a hell of a beating. The other one is on the loose for now, but we have footage from quite a few security cameras, and we're searching through the other one's phone. So we should be able to find him soon enough."

"Okay, thank you for the help."

"Is there anything else you need from us?" I spoke up hesitantly, willing my voice to remain neutral. I just wanted this to be over.

"No, we have all the info from your end. I'll let you know when we have more resolution."

"Thank you officer..." I asked, deliberately letting my sentence fade away questioningly."

"Hernandez, you met me yesterday, I'm the detective in charge of your case, I'll be your point of contact going forward."

"Thank you." Harley finished.

"I'll let you two get back to your night, have a good one"

"You t-" The line cut off abruptly before Harley got a chance to finish her platitude. Fucking rude.

Harley stared at me for a long moment, allowing the tension in the air to grow palpable, clearly trying to think of an appropriate thing to say. "What do you wanna do?"

"Tonight?" I responded quizzically.

"Yeah..." She looked borderline defeated, devoid of her usual fight and moxie.

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"Nothing, let's just get high and pretend like nothing happened? I'm already missing our normal life."

"Sounds good." She reached over to the coffee table and grabbed the large mason jar of weed, portioning it out into the grinder.

"Is it bad that I was hoping he'd be more hurt?" I asked sadly, too caught up in my own emotions to avoid broaching the subject.

She looked at me for a long moment while grinding the weed, clearly debating the answer in her head. "I don't think so, we wanted to harm us, he had a fucking gun V. It's not like you enjoyed hurting him..."

"What if I did?" I asked curtly, intent on watching her hands spin the metal discs around instead of meeting her gaze.

"Honestly, I probably would have too, I've been beating myself up about not helping more, I was stuck like a deer in headlights. It feels good to be protective, it feels good to take back that power." She spoke slowly, and methodically began arranging the ground weed into the creased rolling paper. "Fuck those guys. Don't let them get to you."

"Yeah, you're right. But I don't blame you for freezing up babe, you were rightfully afraid. No shame in feeling that." I spoke as I continued watching her hands delicately rolling and folding the weed into a cone.

"It still feels like shit V, If I were alone, I doubt I would have handled the situation, we got so fucking lucky. It's a miracle we weren't hurt." She punctuated her statement by lighting the joint and taking a long deep hit, passing it to me right after. "What the fuck did they even want from us?"

I took the offered catharsis thankfully and took a long Inhale of my own before replying. "Fuck if I know, there's a hundred people in this building, why us specifically? We're on a random floor, in a back corner, why not the penthouses?" That thought had been wiggling at me all day, this seemed too coincidental, far from a crime of opportunity.

"I don't think it was a coincidence, we were targeted for some reason, did you recognize the one you took down?" She reached out as she spoke and pilfered the joint from my hand, puffing on it thoughtfully before breaking out in a nasty cough.

I let my mind wander on that thought as she composed herself and continued smoking, she had a point, there was little to no reason to choose our apartment. We were in a nice neighborhood, for sure, but ours was nothing but a random door on a random floor in a random building. Why us? "No, I didn't get a good look, but I don't think I knew him." My mind snapped back to his face at that moment, groaning in pain and speckled in blood, he had no distinctive features aside from a bullish nose and a neck tattoo peeking out. I recognized neither of those.

"Maybe the detective will find something, that is his job after all." She passed the jay back to me, deep in her own thoughts, and crossed her legs on the couch, facing me."

"Fat chance." I replied mirthlessly, accepting the dwindling jay and taking a hit. "They'll probably just try to close the case as quickly and easily as possible."

"Fair, I'm just trying to hold out for some semblance of closure, I'm good on that for now by the way, my head is still spinning, and I don't wanna get too high." She punctuated her statement with a wave of the hand and leaned back into the couch, gazing into the middle distance.

I followed her lead, laying back and finishing the dregs of the roach for a while, thinking through our shit situation. "I don't blame you babe, that's all I want too." I let the time pass, perfectly content to stew in our shared silence, and eventually put out the charred remnant of our joint. "I love you."

She turned back to me, and I saw the faintest glimmer of a smile stretch her cheeks before replying and leaning in closely. "I love you too, Vivienne." The look in her eyes spoke novels, the immeasurable emotions too numerous to speak, but it drove me absolutely mad. I'd been so shitty to her, my partner, my other half, I'd taken the ease of our relationship for granted, and little moments like this only reinforced how right we were for each other. I needed to be better.

I leaned in and gave her a long deep kiss, before pulling away and meeting her gaze with one of my own. Our eyes intertwined for some time, and I took in their deep blue hue and endless chasms. "I'm sorry. For everything, for being distant, for being neglectful, I'm sorry."

"I forgive you, we're both going through a lot." Her eyes gazed back into mine, and for a minute, we were so at peace in the world that everything around us seemed to melt away. Just the two of us in our own manufactured void. Content in each other's company despite the ceaseless chaos around us. I wished for nothing more than to just live here with her forever, so I resolved to enjoy this little moment while we had it. I drank in her deep lilac and fresh cotton smell, and allowed myself to collapse in her arms. She followed suit, and we hung there for an eternity.

"What's going on with you Vi?" The question came softly and without judgement. "I've missed you."

I let out a small sigh, remorseful over the fading calm, and gathered my thoughts. "I know, and I'm sorry, but I'm not ready to speak about that yet. There's a lot on my plate, and I'm still working on it. Can we talk about it when I'm ready?" I asked remorsefully, not prepared to tell her the truth, but also very much unable to lie to her at this moment.

She seemed slightly hurt by my denial but acquiesced quickly, evidently too tired to pursue a line of questioning at this moment. "Sure, I'm here for you when you're ready. I love you, no matter what."

"I love you, no matter what." I replied in kind, and slipped back into her arms.