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A Neet's Guide to Becoming a God
Chapter 5: Make a Call

Chapter 5: Make a Call

After I was done with my food, Bob and I headed back to my room. My PC was on like always; on a death screen for a game. Bob's proclamation of wanting to get me powerful hadn't been a joke. He truly wanted to, and just maybe it was possible. Though it would take time and life usually isn’t a straight line. Yesterday I didn't know magic existed, but just a day later, I was bound to a talking magic book and had magic myself.

If this was insane, I didn't want to be sane.

”How do we go about registering with DOSA?” I said as I sat at my desk. “Is there like a building I go to or a website?”

“They have a website on the PPW, prime para web, and buildings all around the states, but we can’t just have you walk into one. They’ll ask questions and they have ways of knowing truth from lie. We need to make it look natural. Grab your phone, and get your skills of bullshitting ready.”

With a sigh, I got up and made my way back into the living room to grab my phone. It was on top of the empty pizza box. “Who am I calling?”

“The local police station. Make something up. Like you woke up and were able to make fire and you feel tingly. It'll get flagged automatically and instead of a cop showing up at your door, you'll get a DOSA officer. From there you'll get registered and a crash course on what you need to know. They'll put you down as a minor sorcerer or a human with a magical talent. It doesn't matter. All we need is the mask and to get you on their systems.”

I dialed 911 and waited. I really hoped Bob knew what he was doing or I was going to sound like a god damned crazy person if an actual cop showed up. When I got through, I made up some bullshit just like Bob had said, and to my surprise, the lady who was talking to me was cut off.

“Sir, we’ll get— Oh, erm, Sir, it looks like I’ll have to transfer you…” She sounded confused, but a moment later, there was a beep and another voice spoke, male. “Sir, could you please repeat what you said, and any other details you might have omitted.”

You might be reading a stolen copy. Visit Royal Road for the authentic version.

I repeated everything and acted confused. “Did I do something wrong?”

“No, sir. Just stay put and we'll have someone over soon. If you feel that feeling again, then try to push it down. Like you might try and hold in a fart.”

“Ok…” The man hung up. “Like a fart?”

“Some people can’t control their magic properly,” Bob said, floating next to me.

A sudden thought occurred to me as I looked at the floating book. “Bob, will they be able to sense you?”

“Not if I go dormant. I’ll be nothing more than a normal book to all but the most powerful of senses. You will have to wake me up with a jolt of mana when you get back though.”

“Back from where?” I said, growing anxious. I glanced at the door.

“He'll take you to get registered at one of their buildings. You'll either get your mask there or they'll give you an appointment and a location. It's usually a DMV. Don’t worry. You won't be gone for long.”

“You aren't coming?” I asked nervously.

“It's too risky to bring me anywhere. Not until we can mask me to muggles and those with magical senses. Even then it would be a risk. Maybe we can create an object to act as a long-range link.”

“Can we do that now?” I hadn't been outside in a while, and I felt nerves creeping in.

“Baby steps, Master. Baby steps. We don't have the power or the necessary materials and you don't have the skill. Yet. Even if we did, just like with the mask, it would have to be sufficiently powerful. A lesser shield wouldn’t do. If someone managed to listen in and gained an interest before you're ready to deal with such things... Well, it would be bad. Very bad. Let's just leave it at that.”

Bob floated closer. “Master you’ll be fine. How do you expect to go to other worlds if you can’t muster the courage to go outside normally.”

“I… I just.” I sighed. Looking down at myself, I knew what was going to happen. You get used to the stares and pointing, but that doesn't mean it doesn’t affect you. I’d let myself go, and now I realized it was because I never expected to want to ever go outside again. “I’ll go,” I said softly.

“We can fix it, Master,” Bob said, apparently understanding my hesitation. “Once we’ve got you sorted, you can start learning.”

“I hope so.”