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A Fair Exchange
Chapter 39: Dodging Arguments

Chapter 39: Dodging Arguments

“Wow, it’s loud in here. What’s all the commotion?” asked Satan, stepping into the room, looking a bit confused. Several other people trooped in behind him.

“Melody, Asmo, and Mammon are all in bed together, tangled up in each other and stuff. It’s hard not to fantasize about where this might be heading…” said Levi with a smirk, standing slightly behind Satan. This time Melody did fall off the bed, landing uncomfortably, but not painfully, in a heap.

“Levi!” she squeaked in protest. Usually, Levi’s commentary was relatively tame as far as such things went. His love for sweet Ruri-chan was often mocked by his siblings, but it seemed he was less insensible to more… adult… topics than he had otherwise shown. Melody’s face was now quite red. Levi didn’t blush at all, however, until he noticed that she was blushing, at which case he averted his eyes and turned equally red.

“Fantasize? Ooh, what sort of fantasy are we talking about?” asked Luke popping into the room at just the right moment to hear Levi mention fantasizing without the previous context. “Like knights and wizards and stuff?” Melody only wished that was what the conversation was about, and by the look on his face, so did Simeon.

“Are they eating anything good in this fantasy?” asked Beel, staying true to form, having also missed the initial statement.

“Looks like it’s going to be another night full of drama,” Simeon observed with a sigh from where he was sitting on his bed. He patted the bed beside him for Luke to hop up and sit with him, just close enough to cover his ears and run interference if necessary. Melody shot him an apologetic look from her place on the floor; she wasn’t quite ready to climb back up into the bed yet. Especially not after Levi’s line. Above her, Asmo and Mammon were still arguing, while she slowly started to scoot away towards the door, the soft fabric of her pajamas allowing her to slide silently along the floor.

“And that makes me Melody’s first man! So, of course, you should keep your hands to yourself when I’m around, out of respect!” Mammon demanded. Melody almost choked on air again. Wait, what? She should have been paying attention to the whole conversation. While he was the first pact, did that have some other significance? She’d been trying to lay low, but, did she need to speak up now, or else leave a wrong impression hanging over her. Asmodeus laughed in Mammon’s face, so she held off.

“Excuse me… what? Did you seriously just call yourself first man? Are you TRYING to make me laugh?” Asmodeus lowered his voice. “She’s a sweet little thing, and she doesn’t have a first man. Or first woman, or first…” For a second, Asmodeus got lost in his own thoughts, on the brink of imagining all sorts of things. But, Mammon had to be dealt with first. “Anyway, it doesn’t matter who was first. If Melody didn’t like snuggling with me, then it would be different. But otherwise, what gives you the right to boss me around?” asked Asmodeus. Melody curled up on herself. Having people so openly talk about her past experience or lack thereof was not comfortable. She would wish the floor would swallow her, but then she’d just end up in the labyrinth again, and she did not want a third visit.

“Melody, don’t be…” Mammon looked around and finally spotted Melody. “Okay, then Asmo, if Melody’s so happy about snuggling with ya, what’s she doing halfway to the door by now?”

“What do we have here…? Two idiots fighting over a normie? Pff, they can both keel over and die for all I care.” While it was nice Levi wasn’t fighting over her, as though she had no preference or opinion of her own, the distancing language hurt quite a bit, and she flinched. She stopped crawling and sat up, bringing her knees up to her chest. Seeing the expression on her face, Levi frowned and looked away, shamed. “Sorry Melody; the ‘normie’ just slipped out. Habit,” he mumbled. Melody tried to find the words to tell him it was okay, but she still didn’t want to speak up. Not yet. So she just nodded at him. While she wasn’t exactly okay, she understood what Levi meant and wasn’t going to hold it against him.

“What about you, Beel?” asked Luke, piping up again. “I notice you aren’t getting involved. But you’re in a pact with Melody too, right?” Melody felt her chest tighten at Luke’s words. So the angels did know about her pacts. It… didn’t seem to make a difference. She watched Simeon’s face, and he betrayed no sign of surprise, no hint that he hadn’t already known these facts. Slowly, the tightness abated. She could only hope that meant the pacts weren’t a black mark against her, though she feared that perhaps she was now a lost cause, so any concern about her was negligible. Still, Simeon had seemed concerned earlier; if she was hopeless now, would he have bothered?

“Too hungry right now. Don’t feel like it.” It wasn’t exactly a ringing endorsement from Beel, but Melody didn’t doubt that he was actually too hungry to care. That wasn’t a good sign. Finally, she got to her feet.

“Beel; do you know where the kitchen is here?” she asked him timidly. Beel looked at her in surprise.

“Are you hungry Melody?” Beel’s question was almost drowned out in the argument that had intensified between Mammon and Asmodeus, including a pillow thrown by the former, hitting the latter square in the face.

“Um, no, but… I just remembered something. If you know, can you show me?” Melody leaned up on her tippy-toes and tried to whisper in Beel’s ear, but she was too far off still. He leaned forward to help bridge the distance. “I have to make food tomorrow, and I’m feeling anxious about it.” On top of everything else, she had forgotten the bomb that was dropped on the first morning at the Castle. She clearly wasn’t going to get any sleep here any time soon, so she might as well put the other worry to rest.

“I’ll help you find the kitchen,” Beel said. The two of them slipped out of the room, barely noticed by anyone, as one thrown pillow escalated into a full-blown pillow fight. Melody could hear bits and pieces behind her as she shuffled down the hall with Beel. One by one, people seemed to get involved in the fight, and Melody was glad she had left; that sort of chaos was something she could do without. Especially since several of the raised voices sounded distinctly angry. Beel looked unconcerned, however, so the two of them kept going.

To Melody’s surprise, she met Lucifer and Lord Diavolo in the hallway. Diavolo, of course, was jovial and greeted Melody with a smile. Lucifer simply raised his eyebrows at the sight of Melody walking around when she had been so tired earlier.

“What is going on in your room?” he asked, frowning.

“Um… I think it might be a pillow fight,” Melody said. “Though, it might have changed to something else by now. I needed to take a walk.”

“Lucifer! A pillow fight!” Diavolo’s eyes gleamed with almost childish glee. He had an entire castle, an entire kingdom, and yet the thought of a pillow fight is what made him seem so happy. He definitely looked more pleased with this than the entire dance earlier that evening.

This text was taken from Royal Road. Help the author by reading the original version there.

“We’ll deal with that when we get there. It’s far too noisy for it to just be Asmodeus and Simeon in there, and that means trouble.” Lucifer sighed. Melody truly felt bad for him. The man seemed to take joy in nothing. “Do you know how it started?” Lucifer’s eyes were fixed on Melody. She gulped. A loud grumble beside her, however, distracted her from answering. Lucifer shook his head. “Never mind; we’ll find out on our own. I’m guessing the two of you were on your way to the kitchen?”

“Yes,” Melody managed to gasp out.

“Don’t cause any trouble; Barbatos is in there right now,” Lucifer said. He seemed about to say more, but already Lord Diavolo was speeding down the hall, and he picked up his pace to catch up with him. Melody had no way of knowing the age difference between two such long-lived beings, but, she suspected that Lucifer was much, much older than Diavolo. Not that it should matter; she was a mayfly compared to them. Tugging gently on Beel’s sleeve, she gestured for him to keep walking with her.

Sure enough, they found Barbatos in the kitchen. At the moment, he was doing the dishes. His jacket had been taken off, and neatly hung up on a hook behind the door. His sleeves were rolled up, held in place by black bands. Even doing something as mundane as cleaning, he had the perfect poise and stoic expression he generally did. Melody wondered if he ever relaxed. Hearing them enter, Barbatos turned towards them, inclining his head politely.

“Can I help you?” There was a slight edge to his voice, not exactly hostile, but it carried with it the unasked question of whether they should be there at all.

“Lucifer and Lord Diavolo know we were coming here,” Melody said, answering the unspoken question first. “I’m sure one of them would have told us not to if it would be an issue.” She sighed softly. “Lucifer did remind us not to cause trouble because you would be in here. But Beel is hungry, and…” She trailed off. She didn’t know Barbatos well at all and rarely spoke to him for any length of time.

“Ah, of course. I have some sandwiches put aside for that very reason,” Barbatos said crisply, motioning Beel towards a pile of neatly cut wedges. The Avatar of Gluttony started helping himself. “After all, we would be poor hosts if we didn’t anticipate the needs of our guests,” he said, showing only the smallest trace of a smile.

“That makes sense; though I’ve never really had to host anyone before,” Melody admitted.

“It’s unavoidable when one is a Prince, or retainer to a Prince,” Barbatos replied smoothly. “But I’m certain Beelzebub could have made it here on his own, so you must have some reason to be here. Is there something you need?”

“Yes, actually,” Melody said with a little sigh. Barbatos gave her an expectant look, silently waiting for her to continue. “I’m really nervous about tomorrow, about making food for everyone,” she said, the words tumbling out when it was clear Barbatos wasn’t going to give her any kind of assurance. “Because I didn’t know ahead of time, I couldn’t have asked for the supplies. I don’t even know what I’m going to make.” At this point, she couldn’t hide the panic in her voice. Beel stopped eating, and half rose out of his seat, but Barbatos tutted softly.

“There is no need for you to fret. Tell me what you need, and I will be sure we have it in stock. I frequently am the one preparing meals here, and it is no loss to me if I have to help prepare this one as well. Lord Diavolo’s goal isn’t to judge you based on your culinary competence. The exchange is about getting used to different realms and the way they work. As long as you choose something that represents the Human Realm, it makes little difference whose hands help prepare the food,” Barbatos explained. While Melody couldn’t quite relax, she could feel her anxiety start to die down. Barbatos wasn’t exactly soothing, but the calm air that radiated from him dispelled the panic in her gut. She took a few deep breaths.

“I’m going to sit down and think about it,” she said, trying to tackle it from a rational point of view. Quietly she sat beside Beel, who was once again munching contentedly away at his sandwiches, the pile dwindling down quite rapidly. However, he was nice enough to hand one to Melody while she thought, a gesture she received with a grateful smile.

By the time she was done with her singular wedge, Beel had finished the whole plate and was idly picking up the crumbs and eating them too. But, at least, Melody now had an idea of what she wanted to do. Asking Barbatos for a piece of paper to write it down, he instead redirected her to text the information to her, giving her his contact information. Being as thorough and organized as she could, when working on such little sleep, Melody made the list and sent it to Barbatos. Hearing the alert, he scanned over the text on his device. Though he looked a little surprised, it wasn’t enough to be concerned over, and he smiled at the end of it.

“This will be quite manageable; thank you, Melody,” he said. “Now, I think it best that both of you get some sleep.”

“Hopefully my room will be free by now,” Melody returned. “But, thank you, Barbatos.”

“No thanks necessary; I’m simply doing my job.”

“I want to thank you, all the same.” Melody turned to Beel, who had run out of crumbs now too. He slowly rose to his feet. Together they went back towards her room. It was deceptively quiet, so Melody thought that everyone must have gone to bed. But, when she opened the door, she saw the room was in quite a state. People were lying haphazardly, on beds and on the floor. Only three people were unaccounted for: Lord Diavolo, Lucifer, and Satan. Everyone else was passed out; a couple of them were snoring. Melody looked up at Beel, and Beel looked back, gesturing for her to close the door. They walked a few paces away from her room and broke down laughing together.

“I’m glad I left before things got that rowdy,” Melody said, wiping a tear from her eyes. “But, I don’t think I want to go back in there, even if everyone is still asleep.”

“The beds in my room should be free,” pointed out Beel. This was true, and they had shared a room before, so Melody didn’t think too much about it. The two of them finally crawled into a bed and were soon fast asleep.

A soft buzzing woke Melody the next morning. It was a text from Barbatos reminding her to wake up and prep the food for brunch. Uncomfortable with going back to her room to retrieve her day clothes and brush, she tidied her hair the best she could in the current room’s bathroom and padded down to the kitchen. Barbatos looked surprised for a moment, but it didn’t last. He didn’t spend a lot of time with humans anymore, but he had heard and seen enough of Melody to know she wouldn’t have crept back into her room; she just had that kind of personality. Hopefully, by the time the actual meal took place, most of the extra bodies would be gone from the room, leaving her to dress in peace. He even cut Melody off when she tried to explain the reason for her disarray, telling her it was okay, and that he understood.

Even though Melody was tired from the interruptions to her sleep, she didn’t mind working so much. Being tired was harder when she was waiting for something to start than when she was actively doing something, and soon she was fully awake, evening humming while she worked. She certainly wasn’t as skilled or knowledgeable as Barbatos, but her chipper mood made her presence in the kitchen a pleasant one. Perhaps fifteen minutes in Solomon made his way into the kitchen, and he seemed to be in a good mood as well. He was wearing one of those funny ‘Kiss the Chef’ aprons. He exchanged silent glances with Barbatos, offered Melody a faint smile, and then got to work on his own food project.

Although Solomon had made amends, so to speak, Melody was still rather wary of him. She couldn’t really tell if he had set her up to make a pact with Asmodeus, or if that was just an outcome that amused him. Or, perhaps he was setting Asmodeus up, and she was a means to an end? It was hard to get a read on the sorcerer. She did believe Diavolo, however, so she wasn’t afraid of Solomon doing anything to endanger her physically, but, she couldn’t bring herself to just forget everything that happened to her. Subconsciously, she held him to a different standard because he was human; she had forgiven the demons for more much sooner.

Eventually, Melody made it to the end of her preparation; the only thing left to do was repetitive cooking. At this point, Barbatos pulled her aside and told her to go freshen up; he would take care of cooking whatever was left. Melody was about to protest but decided to give in. After all, she was still wearing her pajamas, while Barbatos was already neatly dressed and pressed. She had no doubt that he would be able to finish making the meal, and would likely do it better than she ever could. There was just no way to catch up with the very competent butler.