> As any writing student can tell you, the hardest part of writing an essay is finding appropriate quotations and fitting them into context. I have no further wisdom on this point.
>
> -- Edgar J. Edgarson, student of ill repute.
My stomach churned and roiled, frothed and flipped, embargoed and emptied. These sensations were made all the more disturbing since I don't have a stomach. What would my stomach be embargoing anyway? It has no legal authority to ban trade within or between sovereign nations! What if some kind of coalition formed to apply punitive sanctions on my nonexistent digestive track? Bad enough that the fabric of space was shearing away in front of me, splitting into hundreds of fractal shards of existence tearing apart my beloved home as I watched, but now my stomach was causing an international incident!
At least Danztile wouldn't survive. I hope. If I have to bear the discomfort of being 'smeared across the very fabric of space' as she put it, then so should she. 'Below average scores,' what a complete and utter fabrication. I'm sure that my guesses in the multiple-choice section were correct, my instincts have never led me astray. Although I have once or twice been foiled by idiots jealous of my success. Perhaps this was all some sort of assassination attempt. Surely. That has to be it. Yup. No doubt.
No doubts at all.
...
I had always imagined that teleportation would be pretty quick.
Huge explosions too.
If it weren't for the view of distinctly recognizable buildings being slowly rent into thousands of tiny pieces in front of me this would actually be kinda pretty. Fractals are cool.
Hey, there goes my apartment building! I can see the walls being torn off of Angelina's apartment. Serves her right, always going on about her angelic heritage, as if that was somehow superior to my draconic ancestry. She was hot though.
...
At least the weirdness has gone away. I no longer feel like I somehow have biology. Disgusting stuff really, all filled with weird wibbles and wobbles. Other 'W' words too probably, not that I would know. While some cores do go down the route of making actual biological monsters, it takes a lot of knowledge and hard work to accomplish, thus superior cores like myself generally just create mana constructs. I remember Bob vaguely mentioning in Kreature Biology class that she preferred biological monsters for some reason. Not sure why though. My highly tuned draconic instincts were telling me to focus on the girl three seats over from me. She was a transfer student, unnamed of course, although we all called her Briolette. In the eastern parts of the homeworld, it's considered fashionable to shape into a cut style rather than remain spherical. Not something I'd do for myself though I have to admit she had a distinct exotic appeal. The way the mana cascaded through her facets and burst into tiny pinpricks of light at her vertices...
Still floating through space. And now I'm lonely. I hope I'm not stuck here forever watching space go all wonky in front of me. There's a distinct sense of motion so I do seem to be headed somewhere. Not Azim City as I had intended probably. I can't believe all this was caused by a silly typo; that swapping out an "M" for an "N" would result in all this chaos. Who even knew if there was an Azin City anyw--
My musings were interrupted by a huge explosion.
A massive flash of light, the distinct press of an atmosphere rippling with the noise of a loud sharp crack! Pain. Something had struck right into my side, just a little above my center and to the right, sending me catapulting down (there was a sense of down now!) into the corner of a block of wood. A table actually! I never thought I'd be so happy to see a table! I bounced off the table and became aware of the distinct sound of humans screaming, as I rolled insensate along the floor underneath a cabinet. Unfortunately, I couldn't tell quite what happened next as the damn cabinet was blocking my view.
I'm sure it isn't important, or at least not anywhere near as important as what I had discovered as I rolled underneath the cabinet. Simple physics and geometry dictate that a spherical object, when rolling on a flat surface travels in a straight line. My path had curved. Pushing past the pain, and releasing my instinctive grasp on the mana I had curled deep within myself, I could finally give myself a check over. I began to leak mana almost immediately. Whatever had struck me had fractured off a small chunk of my core, likely casting chips across the floor somewhere. There was worse news. It appears that while I had been traveling through space my core had been... deformed. I was egg-shaped now.
My core... my precious sweet core, had been violated. I was an Ovoid now. I could only thank my lucky stars that nobody could see me in such an undignified state. No amount of polish would be able to fix such a large deformation. My exercises could smooth my surface, sure but nothing could fix a deviation that large.
I pulled back in my mana, unwilling to look at myself anymore. There was nothing to do but embrace the pain.
----------------------------------------
I sat there in the dark for a long while, letting the dull ache of my fracture wash over me. Eventually, however, I had to act. Sustaining my life consumes a small amount of mana, which while a near negligible drain was still more than zero. I had lost a lot of charge when my core fractured, only saving as much as I had thanks to instinctively shrinking as much as I could deep into my core. I had lost yet more when checking the damage taken. Magicite is strong compared to many other materials but isn't as physically tough as even many mundane crystals are. A diamond for example is many times more physically resilient than I am. Well... roughly 15 times harder. As loath as I am to say, the most common material comparable to my physical resilience would be quartz.
Regardless I needed mana, and I needed to repair myself, otherwise, I would be stuck here slowly bleeding out my precious life-force until I died. So I unfurled my energies, my mana, my sweet cream of life out into my core, doing my best to ignore the horror of my own shape. I fabricated along my surface, delicately avoiding the areas where I had been chipped, a few small vortices of flowing mana, creating tiny whirlpools connecting deeper into my core. These would pull in the mana that all living things oozed into the air, creating a small (but meaningful) gradient in the mana density, sucking yet more mana into the air around me feeding myself.
I waited.
And I waited.
Nothing.
Not a shred of mana in the air! Was everything on this world dead? No that couldn't be possible. There was wood. Wooden furniture even! I had heard humans screaming! Spending some precious mana to re-enable my sight, I was treated to a horrifying vision. Legs. Barbed and thin, leading up to a smooth carapaced body, long thin, and flat. I was being crawled on. By a cockroach. I immediately formed a spike of mana and stabbed it up into the underside of the offending vermin.
A sharp electrical crack and the hiss of boiling viscera, the cockroach died in writhing flailing agony, as all who oppose me should. Greedily I pulled on the mana within...
Ahem. GREEDILY I PULLED ON THE MANA WITHIN!
Nothing. A living thing completely devoid of all mana!
"What the fuck?!" I shouted, before remembering I had to conserve mana. Luckily nothing on this plane seems to be able to hear mana waves, otherwise, I'm sure something or someone would have come over to investigate, thus discovering me in my vulnerable state.
Unauthorized duplication: this narrative has been taken without consent. Report sightings.
Beginning to panic, I desperately raced through my mind looking for a solution. What kind of crazy-ass universe doesn't even have mana? Come on draconic instincts! Tell me what to do!
It seems my draconic instincts were also panicking. I'm sure that's all. I definitely have them though. For sure.
Unbidden my thoughts drifted to CHECS-U, our graduation ceremony. The beginning of my new life as a dungeon core. What a short and shitty life it was going to be. What had Headmistress Bob's last words been? 'May the System guide you.'
The System! I hadn't called upon the Great Work of the Ancestors prior to now, as it was a mana-intensive process, relative to the amount of mana I had, but perhaps it could guide me.
I spoke the mystic chant to summon the System to my aid: "Status!"
Err. 110010100
Status function impossible at this time.
System not integrated into current aircraft.
Please integrate the System into the world.
That was odd. The System usually doesn't put out binary codes for its error messages. Actually, it doesn't usually put out error messages at all. The only times I've seen the System put out an error message was when it's trying to be cute. This... didn't feel like that. It actually didn't feel quite like the System usually does. Almost as if it was speaking in a different font.
"Uh... Integrate System?"
Err. YrgleShmrg
System Integration is a level 12 user command.
You do not possess user permissions at level 12.
Please contact an Administrator for assistance.
An Administrator? I've never really been a religious Spheroid so-to-speak, I'm not sure they'd answer my prayers, and besides...
"I'm a bit low on mana, I don't think I can send a prayer right now," I admit to the system.
Admin2871:
Yo dog! That's all cool, you seem to be in a bit of a pickle due to a system glitch.
That ain't on you dude! We cool! Give us a chat! I'll hook you up.
"Well ok then!" I mutter to myself, more than a little weirded out. "Give me a second to remember the right mana configuration, I haven't sent up a prayer in a while!"
Admin2871:
No prob little dude! I get ya!
@RealDragonCore9753:
Testing, testing, one-two-three. Am I coming through here?
Admin2871:
Hearing you loud and clear brother!
I'm gonna hook you up to the divine juice right now. That way you don't gotta front the cost of your prayer here.
In an instant, I can feel the channel thrum with power, the sheer quantity of mana flowing so thick I can almost taste it. I try and pull some to help keep myself alive but find my access blocked.
@RealDragonCore9753:
Thanks man, don't suppose I could use this stuff to fix my core?
Admin2871:
No can do little bro. You gotta take the lumps with the bumps,
and them is all from your ride dude.
@RealDragonCore9753:
I understand.
Lousy asshole gods, leaving me to die. Just my luck today. This one seems friendly at least.
Admin2871:
Lousy asshole gods, harsh brah.
@RealDragonCore9753:
I said you were friendly! Actually, I didn't say anything... can you read my thoughts?
Admin2871:
Er... shit man. I'm not supposed to let that slip little dude.
@RealDragonCore9753:
If you can just read my thoughts what's even the point of this whole prayer business?
Admin2871:
Woah man, cool your jets. The prayers for like, official business and stuff ya dig?
Any-hoo, I gotta get to the business here pretty quick now or the boss is gonna be pissed!
Let's just get the System all integrated on your world here.
My draconic instincts flared into life! Possibly just my greed, but I think it's the draconic instincts.
@RealDragonCore9753:
And what do I get for keeping quiet about your mind-reading powers?
At this, I felt a distinct sensation as if the world itself were trembling, for a brief moment, it seemed as if the full attention of some vast unknowable entity.
Admin2871:
Dick move dude, I thought you were chill!
What you got for keeping quiet was me not smiting the ever-living fuck out of your ass!
@RealDragonCore9753:
I am! Chill, I mean, not quiet- though I am that too! Very quiet. Like a ninja, o-or a mouse! A ninja-mouse!
The moment seems to pass. The world silently relaxes, as if the fabric of space itself was slowly releasing tension.
Admin2871:
A ninja-mouse. That's a little lame bro. Not super original
Whatevs. I got the hookup for ya.
See you later dick.
The flow of divine energy stops. In its absence, I feel suddenly hollow, unfulfilled. Sometimes I wonder if I'm truly as great as I think I am. Perhaps my self-assuredness, my own sense of self-grandeur is holding me back. Perhaps...
With a brief quiver of my mana, I shake it off. This is why I never pray, it always makes your head go all funny afterward. Plus that guy was an asshole. Totally lazy. He's supposed to give me some cool overpowered perk or something, not just show up do his job and leave. Plus the ninja mouse was an awesome idea, totally 100% mine. The only reason I haven't made it beforehand is that it's not draconic, and I have standards.
Regardless. Now that the system is integrated, I chant: "Status!"
Status: This Dungeon Core is known to the gods to be a TOTAL ASSHOLE. Further information is only available upon forming a Dungeon.