Something slapped me across the cheek. Then again.

My eyes snapped open as a tiny man shook his fist at me. "You bastard! Who sent you? Did Vral send you?"

It was Farvad. The old gnome looked livid.

"Ugh..." That was the only word I could make.

Farvad slapped me again. It was a little pathetic, but it woke me up. "Who's your master? Speak!"

"Hey, knock it off!" A familiar voice shouted from behind the gnome. A thin hand grabbed his shoulder, and the man was pulled back. In his place stood Tristan.

Tristan?

"What the hell? I finally find you, and you're half-dead on the floor of some shop." His brow furrowed as he inspected me. "What the fuck happened?" He reached into his bag and pulled a flask out. He knelt down, uncorked it, and shoved it in my mouth. When the bitter liquid hit my tongue, I tipped my head back and drank it all. My skin tingled, then I started to itch. A moment later, I felt much better.

"Hey, buddy." I sat up. "Oh, you know. I got my ass kicked by some goblin chick. Beat me up good. I didn't stand a chance." I rubbed my face. I could feel a thin scar above my eye. "No lie though, it was kind of hot. She was awesome."

"Chick?" The gnome looked confused. "I don't follow. Was it a goblin or a chicken?"

Tristan rolled his eyes. "It's old slang from the other world. Alex is out of date in two worlds."

"Ah." The gnome said, stroking his beard. "Intriguing. Alex is a traveler then?"

"Wait..." Tristan glared at the gnome. "I thought you didn't know who he was." Tristan crossed his arms and stared daggers at the man.

"Of course, I remember him! I hired him just yesterday!" Farvad sputtered. "Not that it did much good. He's about as useful as adding chimera to a health potion!" When he saw our blank faces, he added, "it makes the potion toxic. Bad stuff. You'd sprout feathers."

"Neat." I stood up. "So, you guys know each other?"

"Yeah, I found this guy yesterday as he was leaving town," Tristan said. "He said he needed help gathering some herbs outside of town, but when we got out there, he said he forgot what he was looking for. We camped out in the woods, which sucked REALLY BAD," he glared at Farvad, who shuffled, "considering I didn't have any gear and they lock the gates at night. We headed back this morning only to find you in a pool of your own blood."

It was my turn to get glared at. "Sorry, Dad."

He rolled his eyes. "Now that you're awake and okay, what the hell happened again?" he asked again.

"That damn bitch Vral broke into my shop!" the gnome spat, shaking his head violently. "I told her I'd have the money for her in a week!"

"Yeah, that was her. Red hair tied in a braid. Short swords. Completely badass. I'll never forget her. She's my soul goblin," I said wistfully.

"Dude, we need to get you a girlfriend or something. Your brain's broken."

"Shut up." He wasn't wrong. It had been a while.

"Make me," he teased.

I shot him a middle finger and stood up. It was early morning, probably not long after dawn. I looked down at Farvad, who was poking around the odds and ends the thugs left behind. After a time, he looked back up at me, and I could tell he forgot who I was.

"Alex. You hired me."

"Oh, right." He knocked his fist against his head. "I took a blow to the head a few years back. Don't remember real good anymore. I wanted to go out and collect some herbs to make some [Intellect Potions], but I... I..." His eyes unfocused. "Why didn't I do that again?"

Tristan huffed. "You forgot why we went outside of town. We just spent all night camping in the wilderness because you couldn't remember what we went out there for."

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Farvad rubbed his chin, pondered for a moment, then his eyes widened. "Oh, right! It was a lovely evening at least. I hadn't been camping in years."

"You said it had been a month since you'd been in the woods when we talked last night."

"Yeah, that's what I said." The gnome rolled his eyes. "Stupid humans, forgetting things."

Tristan and I looked at one another and sighed.

"Sorry, I couldn't protect your stuff, Farvad." I walked up to the man. "She was much stronger than me."

"Oh, I knew that when I hired you. I just hoped they wouldn't go in the back if someone were here, and I didn't want to get knocked on the head again. That's why I hired you."

"So you never planned on telling me I was going to get into a fight?" I said, my fists tightening. "And you abandoned me here all alone?"

"Yeah."

"Asshole." I shoved past the man.

"Wait!" He shouted behind me.

I didn't want to stop, but I couldn't help it. I was too nice. "What?"

"You signed a contract. If you leave, you'll owe me for damages." His glasses glinted as he spoke.

"Wait..." I said, and a thought came to me. "You had me sign that so I'd be on the hook for anything that got stolen!"

"No, I would never do that."

"You set me up, asshole."

"You should have thought of that before signing a contract." Farvad reached into his pocket and withdrew the paper I'd signed. The ink was softly glowing. "If you walk out of here without fulfilling your contract, you'll become a debtor. Debtor contracts go to the Adventurer's Guild for bounty collection." He smirked.

Tristan's eyes opened. "Alex, you didn't..."

I sighed. "I did. How was I supposed to know? It didn't seem like a bad gig."

"It's a freaking contract." Tristan walked up and began inspecting the paper, squinting and running his index finger under each line.

"What does that mean?" I asked.

"It's basically a quest, but it doesn't come from the system. It works kind of like the quest we got a few days ago, except once you sign it, it acts like a magical bond. If you don't complete the quest or get out of your obligation, you legally become indebted until the cost of the debt is paid."

"Shit." I shook my head. "You knew this would happen," I spat at the gnome.

"Knew what would happen?"

"That Vral..." His eyes weren't hazy this time. The asshole was using his disability to his own advantage. I stepped close to him and spoke through clenched teeth. "Fine, what do you want me to do?"

"Well. Since you failed to stop the theft, you'll be getting my inventory back. But until you figure out how to do that, you might as well make yourself useful." He walked into the back room and returned with a broom. "Why don't you clean while you think?" The asshole gave me a smug grin and handed the broom to me. He must have done this before.

***

I cursed Farvad and every one of his ancestors while I cleaned, organized, and reorganized what was left of the shop. Tristan helped, but the guy hadn't stopped making fun of me for three hours. To be fair, I deserved it. I needed to stop being so impulsive. I realized that I hadn't been taking things seriously. Like it was a game or something. I had to cut that out. Otherwise, I'd end up dead.

Once we'd done as much as we could, the little gnome exited the back of the shop and scrutinized our work. Walking to a shelf near the window, he rubbed his finger on the wood and scoffed. "You missed a spot."

"Alright, I'm done." I threw my rag down. "Look, I did everything you wanted me to. If you really expect me to somehow defeat a goblin that handed me my ass, you're nuts." I shoved a finger in his face. "I'm level zero, man. And she's gotta be way above that. I could barely keep up. Find someone else."

He pulled off his glasses and wiped them on his shirt. Once he put them back on, his gaze was steel. "Level zero, huh?" He looked to Tristan. "Are you level zero too?"

Tristan glared at me. "I'm level one."

"Class?"

"Priest."

"Ah, well." Farvad turned back to me. "Everyone starts somewhere. But I have an idea." The old man disappeared into the back. A moment later, he returned with a handful of potions. "Since you two are so weak, these should help. Two for each of you. Take them, and get my belongings back from Vral."

Tristan's eyes grew wide. He snatched the potions from Farvad's hands. "These are rare. Why would you give us these?"

"Because I'd like to get my things back." He smirked. "And, I wouldn't mind showing those thugs a taste of my alchemy. These are some of my best potions to date, you know. You two babies going out and beating the dreaded Vral the Swiftfang using my potions would be good advertising." He laughed, then added, "Plus, I love seeing people who aren't as smart as me succeed." The old man winked and gestured toward the door. "Now go get my stuff."

I took the potions. "What do they do?"

"Oh, you'll see. Simply take them when the fighting starts, and I'll wager my shop that you'll enjoy the results." The old gnome grinned. "Oh, and remember to keep breathing. Otherwise, you may die. No, go on. Go get my things back." And, with that, the brain-damaged old gnome wandered back into the back of his shop, leaving me stunned and slack-jawed.

Tristan's eyes met mine. "These really are quite powerful. If what Farvad says is true, you and I might stand a chance."

"How can you tell?"

"High-quality potions sparkle. It's all the mana in suspension. Look." He held a potion up in front of me. It did seem to shimmer.

"And if they don't work?" I looked down at the vials. They shimmered in my hand.

"Then I guess I'll get my ass kicked alongside you this time." He laughed. "Or worse. Who knows?"

"Take a job they said. It'll be fun they said. You'll get experience they said. Adventuring is great they said." I kicked the door frame as I walked out of the shop. "This shit sucks." I tucked the potions in my belt as I walked up the street. Tristan did the same.

"No use whining. You did it to your damn self." Tristan shook his head.

He was right. It was no use feeling sorry for myself.

"I have no idea where to start. What do you think we should do?"

I thought for a bit as we walked. "Let's ask around. Someone has to know something. I'm sure we'll find some leads."