22) Cancer freed
Unlike most big box stores, Reddsmart still carried guns in their outdoors section, although I wasn’t going to wait a month to buy one.
Instead, I was looking at crossbows. Which got Blondie's interest.
“Sir, are you thinking of hunting for some of the ones that got out before we got into position?”
I gave him a careful look, but he just looked at the overpriced toys blankly. Well, I got someone here with training I don’t have, take advantage of it old man.
“Not hunting them, that would just be asking to get torn up again, but if they come around my house, where I can shoot at them from a few feet back behind an open window with metal bars between me and them…”
He slowly nodded, then reached down below the crossbows on display to grab a box that he held up before me.
The box showed a guy pulling back on a length of surgical tubing attached to a metal and black plastic slingshot with an oversized brace on top of the guy’s arm.
"Holding up a crossbow would tire you out, and no offense, but I don't think you're going to be able to hit anything at the distance a crossbow could shoot. A wrist rocket can do enough damage to one of those things to hurt it bad enough for you to keep shooting it before it could get away, and marbles are cheap enough that you can practice without having to go and look for the crossbow bolts after shooting a bunch of them for practice.”
He got a thoughtful look on his face, “Or after you ran out and still had a hostile outside.”
That… made seance, both the whole slingshot part, and practicing. “Huh… grab two, and let’s hit the toy section.”
I started heading that way, then slowed down to let him catch up since he had to turn the cart around.
And… “Thanks, Johanson.”
He grunted in reply.
We stopped at a dollar store for marbles, the ones in the toy section of the big box store were way too overpriced, even compared to the smaller bags at the cheaper store. I guess whoever Redd is, he had to make up the money from selling affordable insulin somewhere.
Back home Johanson not only carried in all my stuff, but put a lot of it away in the fridge for me, and inspected the mounting of the bars on the windows along with the locks on the doors while the driver, Mosby, stood guard with an undersized looking automatic rifle.
The blonde soldier even gave an approving nod to my door stopper on the front door and the lengths of two by twos inside the window frames to keep people from pushing the frames up after breaking the glass.
“Looks secure Mr. Bright. I’ll be back in two days to check your wounds.”
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Then they took off.
I put some water down in the kitchen for the coyotes which had already done their business out in my front yard as well as some cheap hot dogs chopped up and mixed in with the dog food to keep them busy for a while.
Then I headed to the bathroom and made myself comfortable.
I had Condition points to spend.
“Show me my conditions Box.”
[ Eyesight 1 ]
[ Teeth 2 ]
[ Heart 5 ]
[ Body 4 ]
[ Pancreas 2 ]
[ Bones 1 ]
[ Libido 1 ]
[ Senility 2 ]
[ Terminal Growths 2 ]
“Shit!”
The level of cancerous growth had gone back up in just a week.
I took a few moments to express my deep displeasure with cancer in general. All those people looking for proof of intelligent design didn't need to look any further. Someone clearly made us just so they could watch us suffer and fear.
Well hopefully clearing all the growths out now would stop them from coming back at all.
I hoped. But by now I knew how much hoping worked.
“Spend two points on growths."
This time it took a few minutes before things started moving around inside of me, I might have even had time to leisurely stroll over to the toilet this time instead of making a mad rush.
But since I was already sitting down with my pants and undies around my ankles meant I was already in place for the sheer nastiness that was coming out of me, and could go right into the shower after wiping and flushing.
Twice.
I didn’t look this time, it was bad enough feeling and smelling all of that as it came out.
As I showered off, I called up my list again. “Conditions”
[ Eyesight 1 ]
[ Teeth 2 ]
[ Heart 5 ]
[ Body 4 ]
[ Pancreas 2 ]
[ Bones 1 ]
[ Libido 1 ]
[ Senility 2 ]
Well, look at that, cancer free. Not only no rating but entirely off the list. That might even mean it's not lurking around at a zero rating and just waiting for the chance to come back.
Maybe I should make an appointment with whatever random quack Medicare says is my regular doctor to check.
Right now though, what else should I buy off?
Thinking about it I knew I was going to have to go back into that dungeon at some point, and at second level with my boost to all of my numbers from being alone, it might be worth going in solo.
And finding out if the coyotes with me counted as being alone or not.
Then, of course, I should find out what the heck Genius Loci meant.
I looked at the list of Conditions.
Heart sounded like a good first choice. Nothing else was going to just straight up drop me dead if I left them for a while.
“Alright, give me two points on Heart.”
You know you can hear your own heartbeat, but you don't because you've heard it beating your whole life so your mind just learns not to hear it.
But when it stops… The silence is noticeable.
As is the pain of what I guess was my entire heart getting fixed up all at once.
I clutched at my chest as my legs started to give out, and I went over backward even as I was crumpling to the ground, knocking my head back against the tiles on the rear of the shower.
Right in the same damned spot as my head had hit the cement in the Dungeons.
As I lay there with the now chilling water from the shower blasting me in the face, I decided that next time I should do this lying down in bed.
And look into getting a handrail in here.
Then my heart beat… once, and my whole body spasmed around in the bottom of the tub.
Somewhere I could hear barking, then my heart beat twice more and I twitched in place weakly, my whole chest was on fire as the blood which had slowed to stop got pumped along in two spurts.
“...sucksss…”
The water had gone completely cold, and the bathroom door had been broken open by an oversized coyote before I was able to start crawling out of the tub, with Wilyna giving me a "Dumbass." look and Blue trying to lick my face.
“...stop it Blue. I’m tired.”
I just went ahead and kept on all fours until I made it to my bed and half stood, half rolled into it.
Within seconds, I was asleep.
Maybe next time I should go ahead and buy off the senility first.