Chapter 187. New Hire.
“I remember my father saying that anyone who represents themselves in court has a moron for his attorney. This isn’t a courtroom deal, just a negotiation, but I figure the same applies. The real question is which one of you is the lesser of two evils. Let’s start with you,” I said, pointing toward the kobold. “Tell me what you bring to the table other than trying to fool people with that gem thing.”
“I am the great Derta Greenscale. With my magic glow rock, I makes your foes do whats you wants. Best pick for helper, I am,” the kobold said with confidence. He may have been confident with his magic gem, but I sure wasn’t. I wasn’t even at tier two and I was able to resist his magic, who knows what ranks and tiers the ones trying to negotiate with me were. For all I knew, one of them would see through Derta’s ruse and attack.
“Less than convincing, I’m sorry to say, Derta. How about you Gimblewalt, what exactly do you bring to the table, how many of these types of negotiations have you handled in the past?” I asked. As I waited for Gimblewalt’s answer, Derta began to hold his gem up, pushing mana into it that began to expand out toward the gnome.
“Nope, you’re done. Get out Derta, I can see what you’re trying to do,” I said, placing my hand on the hilt of my sword. Melvin also started to slither up the wall. He’d eventually make it to the ceiling where he could drop down on the kobold if he tried to cause more trouble.
“You will regret not hiring the great Derta Greenscale your ignorant soft skin,” the kobold hissed before pocketing his gem and stomping his way to the portal. He paused at the portal for a moment, waiting for the system to attune it to his destination before stepping in.
“That just leaves you, Gimblewalt, but that doesn’t automatically mean that I’m going to hire you. Do you have anything to say for yourself?” I asked.
“I do, and I apologize for my prior efforts to inflate my retainer. Let me lay everything out on the line here. First, I am rather skilled at negotiations of most sorts. My initial approach to secure your favor was miscalculated, but I am as good as I claim,” Gimblewalt said. He went silent for a moment, and I could see the stress in his eyes as he struggled with something internally.
“My situation is a desperate one, I must admit. It goes against everything I know of negotiations to admit weakness and give you this information as leverage, but I need this job more than you can believe.
“In fact, my very existence hinges on it. Either I transfer here and work for you, or I return through that portal to face my utter destruction. Pay me what you believe is fair, and allow me to reside here, and I’ll serve you to the best of my ability,” Gimblewalt said.
He was very open now and seemed as desperate as he claimed. I had my suspicions that this could all be some kind of advanced negotiation tactic aimed at plucking my heart strings and making me more willing to accept him into my service. Even if my suspicions were true, I suppose that was just more evidence that Gimblewalt was as good a negotiator as he claimed. I would need help in the coming negotiations, and I really didn’t have a choice other than Gimblewalt unless I wanted to represent myself.
“Is there some way we can do this on a trial basis? I’ll see how you do with the coming negotiations, and then I can decide if I want to keep you on full time?” I asked.
“I could agree to that, but only if you allow me to stay here until I can find some other safe place to reside,” Gimblewalt said.
“Fair enough, and if I don’t decide to retain your services long term, you agree to aggressively pursue finding another place to live,” I countered, not wanting him to turn into some gnomish squatter on my property.
“Agreed, and as for my fee, perhaps a single gold coin for my services in the coming negotiations? I’ll even agree to allow you to pay me less if you don’t feel I’ve offered at least a gold coin’s worth of value in the negotiations. As for any potential long-term employment, we can discuss renumeration for that position when and if we get to that point,” Gimblewalt offered.
“That seems fair to me, just remember, this is my personal space and I set the rules in here. If you do anything to hamper, harm, or disrupt myself or my friend Melvin, you will leave immediately without argument,” I said. It seemed a fair compromise, and I’d have someone to steer me in the right direction during our negotiations, while not being saddled with Gimblewalt long term if I didn’t want to keep him around.
“I think we’ve reached a deal. There is only one last thing I must reveal to you. I’m actually not a gnome, I find that wearing such a ridiculous guise can often grant me an advantage in negotiations when my adversary thinks me a clown. This is my true form, and my real name is not Gimblewalt, it is Tzes’zod”, he said as his gnomish form melted away.
Where the brightly dressed gnome had stood, there was now a walking skeletal figure wearing a dark grey robe that covered most of his body. A dim, green glow shone inside the skull of this creature as he stood there motionless Involuntarily, I sent a point of mana into the Grulnok figurine and summoned him while reaching for my sword and taking a step back.
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“What exactly are you?” I asked as Grulnok moved to place himself between me and the potential threat in front of me. Melvin sent a quick burst of emotion, warning me that his attacks would do little against a creature made of bone.
“Stay your hand, I mean you no harm. Let me explain before you commit to any rash actions,” Tzes’zod implored. “In the past, when I wore a living body as you do now, I was a servant to a powerful mage. He valued my service a bit too much and made me into this undead monstrosity so I could serve him eternally. I was eventually able to leave his service and will now serve you willingly if you still wish to keep our deal,” Tzes’zod said.
He didn’t seem hostile, and after all the crazy things I’d seen since becoming a summoned being, I couldn’t hold being undead against him. It sounded like he was transformed against his will, and if there was anything I understood, it was having a life-changing event forced upon you without your consent. At least he was skeletal and not zombie with the associated horrible stench.
“As long as you abide by the terms of our agreement, I don’t care that you’re undead. Sorry for my response, it’s not often that I’ve encountered an undead creature that wasn’t trying to kill me, well, other than an undead that I summoned,” I replied.
The system has recognized a potential agreement between the being known as Rico Kline, and the being known as Tzes’zod. The following terms, if accepted, must be adhered to by both parties and any being in violation will face considerable penalties.
1. Tzes’zod agrees to serve Rico during the period of time required to complete negotiations over his personal space expansion.
2. A fee of 1 gold coin will be charged for this service as well as residential rights inside Rico Kline’s personal space for as long as he remains employed. If employment is terminated, Tzes’zod will endeavor to find new lodging as quickly as possible. While he searches for new lodging, Tzes’zod will be allowed to remain inside Rico Kline’s personal space.
3. Further extension of employment beyond the pending negotiations will be decided at a later date and is not covered by this agreement.
4. The being known as Tzes’zod will seek to prevent harm, both financial and physical, to his employer during the term of his employment, or during any extended stay inside the personal space. In return, Rico Kline will provide a safe space for Tzes’zod to reside according to the other terms of this agreement.
Do you accept these terms? Y/N.
It looked like the system hadn’t missed anything, so I hit accept.
Both parties have agreed, this contract is now bound by the system.
“Welcome aboard, I guess. What happens now?” I asked my new advisor.
“Please give me a moment, the system is informing me of the process for this negotiation,” Tzes’zod said. I wondered why the system didn’t share the information with me as well. Since he was my advisor in this process, maybe the system figured that I would learn what was necessary from Tzes’zod.
“Okay, I have the parameters of this negotiation. The first applicant should arrive shortly. May I make a suggestion before they arrive?” Tzes’zod asked.
“Sure, that’s why I hired you, isn’t it? Oh, before I forget, here’s your pay for all this,” I said, opening the reward chest and pulling out a single gold coin that I handed to Tzes’zod. The cold bones of his hand closed over the coin, and it disappeared, probably into whatever storage device the undead advisor had on him.
“Thank you, as for my first suggestion, your home is rather spartan. We want to project a more affluent image during our negotiations. Perhaps we should rent some furnishings that would be more appropriate for our immediate purposes?”
“That would be fine, but I don’t have access to anything like that in my personal space. I’d have to wait until I get to Somhagen again,” I told Tzes’zod.
“I’m your advisor, and I have my own connections to make things like this happen. I’m not sure of your current financial status, though I do recommend you share that with me for reference during our negotiations. On the low end, I think we can rent suitable furnishings for the time we need for 50 silver.”
Your representative, Tzes’zod has requested viewing access to your rewards chest and armory, do you wish to grant access? Y/N.
It wouldn’t hurt to let him see what I had, especially if it helped Tzes’zod negotiate better on my behalf. If he really could rent furnishings while inside the personal space, he might also have a lot more use than I had imagined.
Permission to view the rewards chest and armory have been granted.
“Buy whatever you think we need, I can handle paying out 50 silver for it if you think it’s necessary,” I replied.
“You may not be exceptionally affluent, but at least you’re not impoverished. Also, remember that these items are temporary, not permanent purchases,” Tzes’zod reminded me after looking at my funds.
Inside the personal space a large, rectangular conference table emerged, along with a pair of chairs for me and Tzes’zod, and a half dozen on the other side for whoever was coming to negotiate. The table was solid wood, and looked like it was well made with some decorative inlays, exactly what I’d have expected a successful attorney’s office to have. The chairs had a high backrest and wooden arms with lots of padding.
Around the rest of the personal space, some pictures appeared, as well as various plants and knickknacks. A small side table appeared over the rewards chest, hiding it from casual view of any of our pending visitors. Melvin remained on the ceiling, hiding behind a large fan that had appeared to create a pleasant breeze inside the room.
“You mentioned you are a summoner. I would suggest you add a few more of those if you can. We want to appear in a position of strength,” Tzes’zod suggested, pointing at Grulnok. I cast Empower Minion on Grulnok and then Duplicate before summoning Lillia and Rupert. Since I was in my personal space, I grabbed the warhammer from the armory for Rupert to use, as well as my dagger.
I had just completed the preparations when the portal over the doorway flared with bright red light, and a pair of beings stepped forth.
“Oh dear, it does appear that some of these applicants might be a bit problematic,” Tzes’zod whispered to me as the first applicants stepped toward the desk.