Chapter 58
Guess Who's Coming for Dinner?
By the time Martell managed to take a seat on the table, everyone was already having a nice dinner of roasted ham, slices of breads dipped in eggs and fried with lard, and soup made with the bone of the roasted ham.
Connie snacked on pieces of the bread and cuts of ham as she worked in the kitchen. Frying, boiling, and stirring.
“That was really painful,” Martell said. His cheeks were sunken, and he felt so weak that raising his arms were a chore. So, he just laid his head down on the table and spoke from there.
“Why? Mistress? Why did you make me drink that?”
“I need you to be as empty as you could be. Cleansed as thoroughly as when you were first born onto this world.”
“It’s tradition,” Illumca added.
“Indeed, it is,” Connie agreed.
Martell was about to take a piece of bread when Illumca slapped her hand.
“No. This isn’t for you,” the dark elf said sternly while chewing a thick strip of bacon.
“What? But Mistress said – “
“Who do you think she’s cooking for? Sit on your tail and wait.”
Martell groaned and laid his head back on the table, ears limply hanging over his head.
After about half an hour, Martell had fallen into a state where, because of his senses becoming clearer after drinking the broth, the pain of hunger became so real that he thought he was hallucinating when he saw Connie standing before him with a tray of food.
“Now, you may eat.”
“Eh?”
“I can eat?!” Martell’s ears leapt up, but quickly went down again when he saw the food.
The food before him was colorful and appetizing, the smell was so tantalizing that he salivated, yet there was one thing missing.
“N-no ham?”
“Yes. No meat.”
She shoved a spoon into a bowl of gruel and slid it towards him.
“Your meal would be a bowl of gruel made of oats mixed with spinach and two whole eggs, dropped in as it is cooking for richer taste.”
She pointed at a colorful plate of green and yellow vegetables and a bowl of clear and colorful soup. “Stir fried wild herbs with roasted nuts with butter and some salt. Then some soup with chicken stock with thickly sliced radishes and diced potatoes that had been fried quickly in just a bit of olive oil.”
Then there was also a fragrant bowl of potatoes that had a slight aroma of wildflowers and caramel. “I also boiled some flowers with sugar, caramelized the whole thing and slowly fried the potatoes in it as a side. And finally, some fresh cut fruits.”
Martell felt rather cheated. Mainly if one talked about eating meals, there would always be pork. For pork was cheap and plentiful. Chicken, if one had a bit more money. And beef for the ones with lots of it. Meatless was the kind of food serfs eat.
“Mistress, this is…”
“Don’t complain and eat,” she said firmly, taking off her apron and handing it over to Illumca, who folded it twice before putting it aside. “This is made according to the Theravada School of Buddhism. Though I did take liberties. It does veer a bit from the norm because of the lack of many sauces and tools. Of course, the food is made according to the principle of Yin and Yang. Paying close attention to the imbalance of your condition, to balance your body.”
Martell, who had been cleaned out of everything inside his stomach could no longer utter a complain as the hunger had overtaken him. He gorged himself on the meatless meal and forgotten his complains the moment he took his first sip of the soup. He took one sip and then two deep gulps of the soup. The almost saltless but beautiful soup warmed his whole body.
The starch and the juicy radishes after being boiled was very satisfying.
Then he tried the gruel. The gruel was creamy and rather bland, but goes very well with the salty stir-fried wild herbs and the crunch of the roasted nuts. The potato seemed less of a meal and more like a dessert. As he bit into it, the elegant sweetness mixed with the aroma of wildflowers filled his nose and she could not help but smile.
“This…I have never eaten something like this. It is so simple even I can make it, yet how…” the food was nothing special, but he felt that every sip of the soup warmed every part of his body, every bite of the morsels felt so…real. Like he could imagine them becoming a part of him. It was not a matter of taste, but a matter of experience.
Then he remembered her words. About enjoyment and pleasures that he could experience even without emotions.
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“Mistress, is this what you meant?”
Without confirming his words, Connie sat down and watched him eat.
Sensing her refusal to answer, he simply continued to eat until he was full.
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By the time Martell finished his dinner it was quite late.
Illumca and Martell were helping Ethel wash the dishes while Bertus was counting the income for the day. Nick sat like the useless lug that he is, while eating some nuts. While they were busy with their own things, Connie was telling a story to Sen as she sat on her lap by the candlelight.
It was the very picture of a relaxing night. Tomorrow would be a busy day, but for now... a brief calm.
Until they heard something.
Bam…bam…bam.
Martell’s ears shot up. “Did you hear that?”
Illumca put a finger on her lips asking for silence. The whole room went tense.
BAM…BAM…BAM…
The sound grew louder. As if something was knocking on the door. No, hitting on it.
“It’s coming from the basement,” Nick said as he drew himself up.
The basement door trembled with each hit. They were heavy, and angry.
Connie and Illumca looked at each other and then at the basement door where they kept the unfortunate assassin.
“…is he free?”
“Who’s free?” Nick asked, subconsciously feeling that he would not like the answer.
Connie closed Sen’s ear with her hands and said. “Oh, you remember the assassins I told you about? Those that tried to assassinate me?We kept one in the basement.”
“Wha - ?!”
“…No. It’s impossible. I made sure that he is only fed enough so he does not die. He shouldn’t have enough strength to break free from the binding,” Ethel said, disregarding Nick’s dumbfounded expression.
“…Bertus, take Sen to her home, will you? You don’t need to return here tonight.” Connie said as she handed her to Bertus, who nodded quickly and ran out of the store with lopsided lurch. “Ethel, you might want to back up.”
“Told you we should have killed him sooner. Now he’s about to kill us!”
Illumca shook her head. “No, this does not seem like an assassin’s move. If it was me, I’ll feign weakness before ambushing the next person coming in.”
“We should check,” Martell offered.
“Agreed.”
Nick took the candle to shine the light onto the stairs as Martell and Illumca warily walked down. Unlike the others, Connie was not as tense. She simply moved her chair a bit to face the stairs where the basement was and crossed her legs, sipping on her tea.
Illumca saw that the blonde girl had no intention of doing anything and took one of her daggers that had been hanging on the Newel post.
BAM! BAM!
The beatings sounded stronger now. Heavier. The basement door creaked as if something heavy was leaning on it.
The hinges began to bend. The screws started to give until they finally broke, launching themselves off like projectiles. The door fell with a harsh sound and a cloud of dust. Covered by the dust was a man laying hunched on top of it.
Illumca threw her dagger at the fallen man. It hit him square on the back. However, there was no blood pouring out of the wound.
“What? It pierced him but no blood is coming out?!” Nick cried out.
Derrick’s body rose and the dagger slipped from his body and fell onto the floor, trembling for a few moments before staying still. Illumca quickly drew her other dagger and took two steps back cautiously. The man was not normal.
When Derrick finally managed to stay upright, she saw that his wrists were raw and dislocated, showing bones. His legs that were bound with leather were also showing bones. His eyes were crying purplish tears and his almost naked body had bulges that seemed to move.
“Uuh…Uuurgh!!” the man clawed at his neck, tearing skin and flesh. His nails had broken from the forceful action and then he hurled. What came out were clumps of dark, purplish gunk.
“W-what?! The HELL!” Illumca was so creeped out that she panicked and threw out a fire butterfly.
The butterfly made of fire hit his chest, singing his flesh but was quickly put out, as if she was throwing it at a damp blanket.
“Fireball! Fireball! Fireball!”
Again and again she hurled the fire, but it was ineffective. She could have used stronger magic, but she was afraid of damaging the store. Derrick’s body walked up the stairs, step by step. Awkwardly lurching, as if something that had never had limbs before and was trying to walk. His body was also steadily growing and he grew bloated. His once handsome face grew larger like a balloon about to burst.
"My magic's not doing any damage?!"
It was at this point that Martell ran back to the kitchen, grabbed a handful of forks and knives, threw them into the air and yelled out, “Telekinesis: Control!”
The utensils that he used before rose into the air.
“Fire!”
The knives and the forks all sped towards Derrick, stabbing him without distinction. They embed themselves deep into him. The effect made him look like he was a reversed porcupine. And yet it only made him fall back one step.
“Back up!” Illumca yelled. Nick readied his sword and was about to do the job for them, but Connie stopped him.
“Let them handle this.”
"Are you sure? That could be an undead!"
"Whatever it is, I'm sure the two of them can handle it."
When he reached the top of the stairs, Derrick’s body had grown thrice the size of the body. His eyeballs had already popped out of their sockets and his underwear had long since snapped. It would take only a bit more before she would explode and sent guts and gore everywhere.
Suddenly, he tripped on the last step and fell forward.
His body, as it could no longer hold whatever was inside, finally gave up. From all of his orifices, dark purple liquid leaked out. His bloated body gradually returned to its former size before shriveling up as it enveloped his body and finally digested the shell that was Derrick. It only took the monster mere seconds.
Nick and Martell finally recognized the invader. “It’s that giant slime!”
“Oh. Shit,” Nick cursed.
Connie raised an eyebrow curiously. “Oho.”
"Did you two know this thing?! Did you bring it here?!"
"No. We didn't! This isn't even how slimes are supposed to be! It's too big!!"
Illumca ignored Nick's defensive argument and activated her skill. "Analyze!!"
The dark elf saw the numbers and bit her lips in anger. "41. It's an upper C-Rank Monster!"
Two tentacles burst forth from the large slime and shot towards Connie. It was slower than the Treant-Golem's punch, yet she did not make a move.
“Mistress!”
“Milady!”
“Haah!!” Illumca shouted the skill to imbue fire into her dagger and cut through the tentacles. The severed parts fell onto the floor and broke apart with a splash.
Another one shot from Illumca’s blind side with faster speed. In a panic, Illumca shouted. “Shadow Step!”
She disappeared into the shadows and appeared from behind Connie and dragged her down from the chair. The chair exploded into pieces from the attack. But the slime did not stop. It shot out another tentacle and another, aiming at the dark elf and her companion.
The two rolled away from the attacks before stopping behind the kitchen.
"Connie! Why didn't you move?! You could have died!"
"And missing being hugged tight by a desperate dark elf with bountiful bosom as we roll away into safety? I think not!" Connie laughed, apparently finding this current situation quite amusing.
"You are too sly!" the dark elf said exasperatedly.
"Oi, you two! Stop flirting and kill it already! It seems to be just targeting you!" Ethel, who had ducked under the counter when the chaos started, complained loudly.
The tentacles continued attacking Connie and Illumca but could not manage to penetrate by the brick counter.
Ethel noticed this and smiled smugly. “This is why I made my stingy husband splurge for a full brick counter and none of that wooden ones. Goddess rest his soul.”