Spoiler :

OK this is to be the base of what is soon to be the cover of this fanfic hope you guys like it :)

http%3a%2f%2fi238.photobucket.com%2falbums%2fff171...%2fwill2.jpg [http://i238.photobucket.com/albums/ff171/frostypinekng/will2.jpg]

Male and Female

(Wilhelm Dragonsong)

I couldn’t stop blushing. Now please don’t judge me for this. I have always been a somewhat awkward person when it comes to people. The only real exception for me in this case would be perhaps children and this is mainly because as I have found compared to adults children tend to be less expecting and judgmental.

I hadn’t planned to have this conversation with her but after that chat with her father I both remembered the past and came to a realization because of it. Plus it seems to be almost an unofficial tradition to do so in cases like this one.

It isn’t that I am innocent or unknowledgeable it is more like I am just somewhat ignorant in the ways of people, and while my physical clumsiness doesn’t bother me particularly as I don’t see it as a weakness my social clumsiness does.

Geeze, on top of being embarrassed for the subject matter I am now getting embarrassed about my embarrassment. The last time I can remember being so embarrassed was many years ago, I was a young man who had just ended their apprenticeship for various personal reasons and decided that now that I could actually do magic, some official instruction wouldn’t be amiss.

The incident happened not long after I was assigned roommates at that magic school. To give you some background (as well as put off describing the event for a bit longer) unlike my current country the location of that school was in a land where magic was a common everyday thing so much so that almost everyone knew at least the basics and most institutes of higher education were magic colleges.

Thus strange as it may seem I was considered a bit old when I went to that school as I was officially an adult. I was certainly at least quite a few years older at least chronologically then most my roommates. That’s why I theorize that they assumed that I was world wise.

As for myself I had not interacted with many people outside of my family, my former master and friends and only very casually with other people. Though I had read quite a few books all of them up to that point were dry technical beasts without flaw or humor.

So…when those kids started up a discussion with me about how they greatly desired to discuss the birds and the bees with the butterflies in the red lights district…I took things completely literally. For quite a while I was under the misapprehension that the town had some strange magical park were you could find huge glowing red lights and plethora of giant insects that could sing and dance.

What made things worse was that I was under the impression that it was something that ‘everybody’ knew about…so I pretended that I also did, thinking I was saving face and fooling them. Actually I truly did seem to manage deceiving them that I did indeed know what I was talking about.

It was something of a lucky accident because ironically while I didn’t know the slang they were using. I did know exactly what such things were, and in probably in much greater detail than those boys fantasized though I had never personally experienced them for myself or desired to do so.

So happily I thought that I had mostly avoided being seen as a fool. Then finding out the truth of my mistake, not only did I see myself as a fool (which is even worse than others seeing you as a fool). The situation got worse to the point where I felt like I could die of embarrassment, when a trait one of my ancestors passed down to me activated and made me make a fool of myself in another but equally mortifying way but this is really getting off the subject so I should definitely stop rambling on like this and talk about what happened.

***

“She said to me…that I was male and she was female.”

I paused and looked at her from the corner of my eye the girl had a most blank expression.

Not wanting to feel her emotions I had gotten the tightest grip on my senses than usual. However I was somewhat good at reading faces so I was glad though wary that she didn’t really have anything for me to read.

Thinking that such a state could change at any moment I looked back down at the ground In order to have the will power to continue. I gathered up my strength as well as my breath planning to get the whole speech done as quickly and as soon as possible.

“She said that a master apprentice relationship or at least…a proper master apprentice relationship was one of the most intimate relationships possible especially when it was magic being taught. Not only does one have to share copious amounts of time with another person, one tends to learn many things about the other person and about oneself that you didn’t know before and would have never have known otherwise.

Then there is also the fact that unlike a plain teacher student relationship, where the teacher is usually making information found in books more palpable and most everything is public and involves at least two students and the students teach each other at least as much as the teacher does. In the case of a master they mainly teach things only if they personally learned them. It is also almost completely one on one and often involves trade secrets.

It is a very private thing and normally the master will give an apprentice things that they would never give an ordinary student, and the apprentice has to tell the master things they would tell no one else, but they have to because it is required that the master knows them in order for the apprentice to get the best results.

It is also quite common that if the apprentice makes a discovery or accomplishment of some sort while still being a pupil of the master the master will get at least some if not all of the credit, and in return any past achievements the master has will rub off on the student. This is because as soon as such a bond is made the honor of both apprentice and master are tied together forever and the actions of both their past and future will from then always have an effect on each other.“

I pause here wondering what she was thinking of this remembering what I had thought and felt when my master had told me these things. I had been quite surprised as I had never thought of it in that way before.

“With such a close connection, it is not surprising when the apprentice develops great admiration and respect for their master, or when the master tenders pride and affection for their apprentice.”

I stopped briefly once again here comes the beginning of the hardest part I thought.

“In the case where the two are of the same sex, such emotions usually end up making the pair become close friends. In cases usually where one is much more mature than the other they can even consider each other to be adopted family.

However when master and apprentice…are of opposite gender such intimacy can be dangerous in a way, because either one or both will mistake such feelings for love…or because familiarity can breed attraction the two can fall into actual love.”

Royal Road is the home of this novel. Visit there to read the original and support the author.

I was sure that my face must have been quite red because my cheeks were burning I pressed my hands to my face hard as I prepared to say the worst.

“I know this a bit ambitious of me to say, because of my looks…but you should definitely…at least consider the possibility that at the very least at some point of time we might become attracted to each other.”

Yes this is definitely a possibility we have to consider. I have seen many couples fall in love in similar or less intense circumstances and of those couples quite a few were not exactly considered pleasing to the eye. Also although I am the first to admit that I can’t exactly be called handsome I do have other qualities that I know can be attractive to others.

If I leave out my at least noble birth and near endless wealth, I have been told by quite a few that I have a strange sort of charisma when I fight or use magic excessively. My master said it was partly because women are attracted to strength, but I have another theory to add to that.

It is kind of strange that while I have several races known for beauty in my heritage, I myself do not really show it, making me definitely a black sheep. But I think that just because it isn’t normally visible doesn’t mean that I somehow lost that inheritance but rather that it is in hibernation, and occasionally wakes up due to stimulation. I have some evidence for this theory of which my looks and charisma were only a small part. Mainly it has to do with why I can only use some kinds of magic sometimes but I am getting off the subject again.

You may have noticed that I mainly pointed out my looks and left hers out. Well let me say that what my master said somewhat put me off the subject, actually her speech was a bit different then mine.

“I am so beautiful that you will definitely fall in love with me ha ha ha, so if you can live with the jealously and anguish of me never loving you back, then I won’t mind taking you as my apprentice!”

Yes I distinctly recall her saying something like this. At that time if I hadn’t thought that she wasn’t the best and strongest mage and teacher, I probably would have walked away from becoming her apprentice then and there, but I am glad that agreed despite my distaste because not only was I right in her being one of the best teachers I ever had, events led her to wish that she had never said those words.

My main annoyance with my master’s statement was the thought that one only falls in love if the other has a nice appearance. A belief I find most ridiculous personally, for I at least have yet to even have so much as a crush let alone fall in love.

While Vanessa is I admit very beautiful. In truth I have seen many beauties and did not carry so much as a torch for any of them, and that includes my old master who was at least as beautiful as her granddaughter.

No at least in my case, falling in love did not come from beauty but personality and intimacy, and being of the opposite sex. Which is why in this country’s older era if one asked a prospective master formally to be their apprentice while of the other gender it was basically considered the same as a marriage proposal.

I had no plans to illuminate her of this fact, there was no need to make her feel embarrassed for such an ignorant action. In my opinion it was nothing to be ashamed of, in fact I empathized with her, having made the same mistake but am still continue to pay dearly for it…my former master still teases me about it to this day.

However I wonder if I wouldn’t be as willing to do this favor for her if like my master and other many other people making others feel pain and or embarrassment gave me pleasure.  

Glad that I got the hard part over with and done sorting my thoughts I slowly looked up to see her still frozen in the same position she had been in, however as an indication of her humanity she was also blushing though not as greatly as I was.

“Ehem…well did you hear all of that…did you understand what I said” I asked just to confirm I didn’t have to repeat that torture

“Y-yes” She squeaked “I understood I mean I understand!”

“That’s good.” I nodded already recovering… “Besides that concern there is another even more important thing that I need you to consider”. I said

“What is it?”

She asked looking so excited that I wondered if she was thinking I was going to bestow on her some great secrete…well that idea wasn’t entirely wrong though it wasn’t exactly a secret.

“How much do you want to learn magic?” I asked

“What?” she said confused

“How much do you desire to learn magic?” I repeated

“Let me explain. I know from your schedule the personal experience of you teaching me that you are very devoted to martial arts. In martial arts ones has to have a lot of dedication in order to be good at it. However…when comparing it to learning magic specifically learning magic with the intent to master it as much as possible it requires many times the dedication and devotion that one is required to give to martial arts.”

I closely studied her face to see if she was surprised but she just seemed thoughtful so I continued

“Though I have had many students I have yet to have a single apprentice, and if I take an apprentice that person can’t be halfhearted or even a bit uncertain when it comes to their willingness to learn magic. As I myself am taking a break from the magic world to learn the sword, I am willing to make accommodations right now for at least a few years on the time spent learning magic, I will even help you deal with your father.”

I nodded at the slight smile she had then held up a hand for emphasis before seriously saying

“However if and I mean if I take you on as my apprentice I will only do so if you stop eating breathing and sleeping being the vice master and top warrior of your fathers dojo and make time to become the apprentice of a wizard and with at least as much resolve and dedication as you have been putting into your martial arts probably even more.

Such a decision may even include having to leave the dojo for long periods of time. Right now as I said I am taking a break from magic but in the not too distant future I will have to return to my various obligations such as my teaching positon at the magic school as they are considering this a sabbatical, and after I am done teaching and if I still have an apprentice at that time I may have to leave to other lands and my apprentice will have to go with me.

There is also the nature of the definition of the apprenticeship to keep in mind but you probably already have an idea of what it entails. Basically part of the apprenticeship oath and contract is to be reasonably obedient and to not do anything against any rules the master may set out or to do any actions if it greatly goes against the masters beliefs or dishonors them in some way ”

I could tell that she was a bit afraid of what I said but as she didn’t take back her request I decided to continue to give her a chance

“As I think I have already said, you need to carefully think about this and whether an apprenticeship with me is what you really want. Take as much time as you need and when you have absolutely no doubts    come to me and I will either take your oath and sign a contract to be my apprentice or accept your apology of not taking such a solemn thing seriously.“