Fuck. Is that how they say it?
The words felt off on his tongue, but he had no other words to describe the situation he was in. He was fucked, and his new insight into adulthood told him that screaming the words out loud or internally would make him feel better, though all it seemed to do was increase his anxiety.
Shit. This isn’t working out so well.
He decided to put off the swearing after feeling idiotic. The words were meant to be indecent, offensive. Maybe if he was angry enough, he might have felt at home cussing, but he wasn’t anywhere near angry. It was mid-semester all over again, except that he was the one who was disoriented now, while everyone else was sharing excited giggles and pushes while they waited in the unfamiliar lobby composed of white blocks. His hand was clamped on Jewel’s, nearly shivering. Even inside the Otherworlds, his breathing felt heavy, disjointed.
“You okay?” Jewel whispered, giving him a worried glance.
“I’m terrific,” he lied, though his face was probably saying otherwise. Maybe his teeth would start chattering if he tensed further.
She frowned a smile, then turned to look forward. Well, this wasn’t good. She was nervous as well, judging by the lack of conversation that ran between them. He was grateful for his enhanced body since his palms would have been drenched with sweat. Jewel’s skin felt incredibly delicate in his hands, and he couldn’t help but notice how soft they were when he gave it a weak squeeze. It was more like a twitch.
All because of that one video.
The hole in his psyche had been filled—no, rammed with information. The first few seconds had been fine until the action had begun, after which intense nausea had overwhelmed him. He had heard his blood hammering away in his ears while his eyes failed to retreat from the scene. Something had clicked, snapped, ruptured. All the dots had been connected, and innocence wasn’t an option anymore.
Standing there in the small crowd, he felt filthy. Someone would point their finger at him and call him out for the crime he had committed.
Snap out of it, me. Everyone here knows. Everyone here is the same. It couldn’t be wrong if everyone knew of it. Society was forged on a consensus, and the fact was that they were all here with that in mind.
Really hope this is one, elaborate prank. Nothing solid had been stated, so for all he knew, it could be something as simple as a feast. They’d never had one of those yet, and he was looking forward to stuffing himself with three times his body weight’s worth of food. Well, had been. He was too restless to care now.
If only he hadn’t looked.
He thought about leaving, but before his thoughts could get a foothold, there was a blast of light that caught everyone’s attention. Elias glimpsed at the time. Exactly one in the afternoon. Stonneran had arrived perfectly in time.
“Hey, guys!” he said loudly for everyone to hear. “Everything is ready now, and we have twenty-four hours until the world shuts down. Don’t worry about the costs, since my brother is a generous guy.”
A large gateway began to materialize behind him, displaying a curious scenery beyond. “Let’s head right in! Just try not to wander off to the edges. There’s a high drop, and having fallen once, it doesn’t feel good.”
His classmates began to pass through the gateway, boys and girls alike. When he turned his head, he caught Jewel looking at him, biting on her lower lip. Her eyes—were they worried? Elated? He couldn't tell.
“Let’s go?” she said with a gentle tug.
“Yeah. Whew, I don’t know why I’m so nervous,” he confessed. “It’s supposed to be a party.”
“Same here. Maybe because we’re looking forward to something.” Her voice was even softer now.
He cleared his throat, feeling like he’d vomit, except that he was perfectly fine. “I wonder what that is.”
She didn’t say anything, but began to walk towards the entrance, pulling Elias behind her. He let her softly drag him along like a balloon. Closer, further. He could now spot Stonneran’s thrilled expression by the giant portal, smiling as he gestured classmates in like some kind of overseer.
“I’m scared, honestly,” he breathed, his voice less than a murmur. Either it had been too soft or Jewel was distracted, because she made no sign showing that she had heard. He closed his lips. He couldn’t back out now. He couldn’t be a wimp when Jewel was here.
Stonneran was beaming through every opening, his teeth shining in a brilliant fashion. He was wearing stylish clothes Elias didn’t recognize—a kind of dark coat that reached to his knees with a light, fluffy sweater underneath.
“You’ll find everything in there,” he informed, pointing to a long, wooden building up ahead. “This particular world is meant to be as close to reality as possible, so it might be a bit cold.” As if to prove his statement, a chilly wind blew across their faces, making Jewel’s silky hair flutter. “Go inside, change into robes. There will be SPCs that will lead you, though they aren’t that smart. Don’t worry; you’ll still be able to enjoy them. And there’s plenty.”
Jewel only nodded.
“What do you mean, enjoy them?” Elias asked out of troubled curiosity.
“Oh, right, you. But I thought Jewel told you, didn’t she? She couldn’t have lied, since she’s not good at it.”
“I have a rough idea,” Elias said, lowering his voice. He didn’t like the way Stonneran had mentioned Jewel so casually, nor the fact that he knew that he knew. Had Jewel told him?
“Then enjoy it! We’ve been waiting for this moment since forever. Grow some balls.”
Stonneran gave him a rough pat on the back, pushing him inside with Jewel while another member came to him for questions. Though he had some complaints, many complaints, he swallowed them and looked ahead.
It was cold. Their clothes were summer attire, which let the air right through the porous fabric. He shivered as a gust of wind blew through the grassy landscape once more, which in itself, took his breath away. His eyes widened as he took in the full expanse of the world.
They were surrounded by vast, lush mountains, whose peaks were blanketed by large, misty clouds of light gray. The sky was frozen in a blend of dark blue and fiery orange, an eternal sunset caused by the perfect sun that hung just over the horizon, the only direction where the giant mountains didn’t conceal the surrounding area. Below the sun’s direction was an endless ocean, painted with the same colors as the sky.
The sun was behind them, and a short sprint would let him jump off the edge. He guessed that they were on some kind of mesa. It was low enough that the clouds didn’t reach their heads but high enough that a building in the distance had its roof swimming through the fog. Speaking of fog, there was a lot of it floating upwards from behind the large building.
As they walked down the stone path, a faint, slippery smell entered Elias’s nose. It wasn’t unpleasant, but it strangely reminded him of eggs.
“It’s starting to smell weird,” he said, taking in a deep breath. The air held patches of warmth that contained the distinct smell within.
“It’s familiar. I’ve smelled it before when I went on a trip with my parents.” Her eyes widened. “It’s a hot spring!”
“Hot spring?”
“Think of it as a public bath,” she said, wrapping her arms around his arm, so naturally that it took him a second to notice. “It’s good for your skin if I remember correctly. Makes you all glossy and tender.”
“A—a public bath? You mean we’ll be taking a bath together,” he tightened. Jewel felt warm.
She grinned. “Usually, it’s separated between males and females.”
“That’s a relief. I wouldn’t want others to see you—” He stopped. Was he being too possessive?
“See me?”
Blushing, he shook his head. “Nothing. Well, I’m glad that the baths are separated.”
They entered the building, which had a protruding entrance, triangular at the top, supported by numerous straight posts at the sides—all made out of brown timber. The wood had an exquisite reddish hue to it, like the deep shade of expensive liquor. The doorway was lighted by two red lamps, both round like an orange that had been pressed down gently. They swayed mildly in the wind. The doors themselves were open inwards to reveal the ebullient lighting inside.
Warm, cozy, and moody with a pleasing smell of various spices, not too strong to make him dizzy. The atmosphere inside was in stark contrast to the barren cold behind, which seemed to be leagues away. It was soothing, and Elias could feel the shivers melt away. Most mystifying of all was the beauty in front of them, who was behind a small reception desk. She wore a kind of white dress with long, loose sleeves, weaved with intricate patterns of branches and flowers. From her waist down, a rosy garment covered everything underneath. Her hands were held in front of her in a subservient manner. She was smiling, her silver eyes gazing at them.
“Welcome. Males to the left, females to the right, please,” she said, motioning with her arms in a perfect, scripted fashion. Even her voice sounded ethereal, soft and kind. “You can change into robes inside. Please head to the restaurant on the second floor afterwards, which you can access through the stairs. If you have any questions, you can ask the staff, who will be in similar clothes as mine.”
He could see why Monroy and Terral had been excited to meet SPCs.
They separated to go into their respective changing rooms after taking off their shoes. He found the guys inside, laughing and looking more exhilarated than ever.
“Did you see the receptionist?” It was Noza who had spoken to him, which was a surprise since he hadn’t seemed that interested in girls. “She looked like an angel.”
“Well—maybe.”
“What would Jewel say if she heard that?” joked Terral. He had already changed into his robes and was making his way to the stairs. “You wouldn’t want to cross her.”
“Hey, for me, Jewel is the prettiest.”
“Yeah, right.”
“No, really.”
“I mean, yeah, you like her character. But are her looks really the best?”
“You can’t shake me with those kinds of words. Too weak,” Elias snorted. “Sad that you’ve never dated someone before, since you wouldn’t understand.”
“Yeah, I guess I don’t,” Terral said with a pause. “Well, good luck with tonight. I guess she’ll be your only partner.”
Before Elias could say anything, Terral vanished up the stairs. He felt his face heat up, but his virtual anatomy kept it under control. Partners? With Jewel? It was both intoxicating and terrifying to imagine.
He changed into robes as the others made their way to the second floor. It was comfortable, and the ebony fabric was silkier than anything he’d worn before. The long ends rippled as he moved, brushing against his bare skin. He wasn’t wearing anything else underneath except his underwear. The robes were secure enough.
Following his friends, he made his way upstairs. An abundance of savory, sweet smells greeted him before the scene did, which was like something out of a fairy tale. Bright chandeliers illuminated the thick tables filled with food—neatly arranged delicacies that made his stomach growl. The table ran down the entirety of the room, the food on top never identical down the whole length. There were other tables surrounding the main one, embellished with platinum gold drink stands and desserts of every kind. Cake, pudding, ice cream; pie, custard, caramel drops; mousse, toppings, honey and syrup. The list went on and on. Just in case anyone couldn’t find a dish they wanted, four handsome chefs stirred their steaming pans on the fire, cooking up whatever was necessary. The food would never grow cold or spoil.
Waiters and waitresses stood professionally in every corner, picking up used dishes and replenishing utensils. Though different, all of them were gorgeous in their own way, angels in garbs of black and white. It was almost unnatural, seeing them work with so much perfection.
Following everyone’s example, he took a plate and began to pick out whatever dish he wanted to try. Some raw fish on top of rice. Those were rare. A small bowl with creamy soup. He always liked those. Meat was good, like bacon slices and sausage bits. He couldn’t forget the smoked steak with dark sauce either. Most important was the buttered bread that would harmonize the whole selection. Except maybe the fish.
He spotted Noza and sat next to him, along with Terral and Monroy, filling the four-man table. They were chewing furiously, their expressions changing to match the food they had in their mouths.
“This is ter—riffic!” Terral said through mouthfuls of food. “Dude, get the mashed potatoes with gravy. So good.”
“Never tried them. Can I have a taste?”
“Sure. Not too much, though.”
He began to eat, and though he was reprimanded by Noza for not using any sauce on his fish, he was thrown into a new world of flavor, each bite not losing to the last. Though he told himself to slowly enjoy the textures and aroma, the food went flying down, and in mere moments, he had cleaned his plate.
His friends were already gone for a new selection. Little surprise there. He did the same and scooped up generous portions for himself, again, though with new flavors. Just when he was about to return to his seat, he saw Jewel at the other side, where the majority of the girls were. She spotted him too and waved.
She sat down on an empty table, and he took a seat in front of hers.
“We forgot drinks. Anything you’d like?” he asked.
“Grape juice,” she said.
He fetched two cups of juice and set one down, which Jewel took with a smile. He sat down and took a sip. Even the juice was rich and wonderful.
The food entered his mouth like before, though with more moderation. Halfway through his fried shrimp (this time with the appropriate sauce), he spotted Jewel’s plate. It had barely been emptied. Swallowing, he cleared his throat with juice and set his hands on the table.
“You okay?” he asked softly.
She nodded without looking at him. She was chewing, slowly, but still chewing. She seemed to be lost in thought.
It suffocated him. She was usually the talkative one, even more so in moments like these. Moments where he felt weak, where he felt vulnerable. Unsure. She’d laughed through his worries, dissipated his clouds.
He continued to eat, focusing on the flavor. It was good, so terribly good. It could nearly make him forget about the real purpose of the party.
“Ahem. Attention!” said a sudden voice. “Welcome, everyone. Thank you for coming to this special party.”
Elias turned his head and saw Stonneran at the front of the room. Everyone else did likewise, except the SPCs, who were more or less apathetic. “I’m glad everyone is enjoying their meals,” he said, his voice sure. “The buffet will always be open, so you can eat whenever you want. But, as I’m sure everyone is aware, this place isn’t about the food.”
Murmurs and cleared throats. A few giggles. “You should have seen the exits that lead to the hot springs. It’s the big thing without doors. Well, those are separated baths.”
There was silence. “What? What did you expect?” Stonneran said. Nobody dared to rebut his statement. Elias felt a tiny amount of relief.
“But,” he went on, “at the corner of the room, there should be another exit. It’s easy to miss. Right corner for the guys, left for the girls. Now, I’m not saying anything, but only the brave should go through that exit.”
Voices began speaking at once, though very hushed. Stonneran grinned widely. “Any and all of the SPCs are interactable, if you catch my drift. There are many more around the resort. Get started any time you’d like. You have around twenty-three hours now. And remember! Only towels in the baths. Let’s get this party really started!”
As if he had given a cue, upbeat music began to blast away, allowing the cheers to come more readily than not.
Annnnd there goes my hope. He looked at Jewel for consolation. Maybe they could stay here, or leave early and do something else.
“See you there,” she promptly said, got up, and walked away, crushing any residual hope he had left. His appetite faded in an instant, and the smells didn’t feel as good anymore. He felt full, despite having a stomach without limits.
Others were leaving the second floor in droves. He caught one last glimpse of Jewel before she went down the stairs, surrounded by a mass of giggling girls. She hadn’t even turned back to look at him.
He sat there until everyone had left, save a few people still eating. He closed his eyes.
“Lost in thought, aren’t we.”
It was Stonneran, looming over him. He reluctantly looked at the guy and stared. Not a full-eyed stare, but more like a tired, half-stare.
“Come on, you can’t keep Jewel waiting. She was looking forward to this.”
“You know, I never did get you,” he blurted without giving it much thought. “You act all familiar with her, then you act like you’re…” he trailed off.
“The heck? Finish the sentence.”
“Nothing,” Elias said with a sigh. “I want to get this straight. Everyone’s going to...do that, aren’t they?”
“What? You mean sex?” Stonneran rolled his eyes. “Duh. What are you, a kid? Come on, don’t be so weak about it. We’re adults, so we should act like adults. Besides,” there was a funny smile pasted to his lips, “it’s not like what we do here is real. Yeah, I get that intercourse outside is kind of sensitive, but here? When we start really diving into the Otherworlds, we’ll be shooting, killing. You’ve killed people before in games.”
“That’s different.”
Stonneran shrugged. “Murder, this sex thing. Same thing. Bad in reality, but not here. No consequences whatsoever.”
“I don’t know. I really don’t know.”
“Wish you’d grow a spine, but I get it. You were late to the details. I know you’ll get used to it someday, but come on. Don’t disappoint Jewel.”
Elias flinched. Sexual acts outside of marriage were immoral. His father’s words had stuck with him, especially since it had been his first admonishment in a long, long time. They’d cause a lot of problems.
“I’ll disappoint her if I do it,” he complained, trying to make excuses. Her parents would never approve. Maybe she didn’t really want to. But he could feel the noose closing around his neck, sapping his thoughts. His excuses sounded weak, even to him. He had seen her gestures, her affection. She was willing.
“Then learn! Learn together. She’s new to this too.” Stonneran groaned and put a hand to his forehead. “This is getting nowhere. I’m new to this too. Everyone is, so nobody’s going to care about technique.”
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“Technique?”
“Can’t believe I’m saying this, but I convinced her for your sake. And I equally can’t believe how reluctant you are about it. You know what, go to the baths. The public one. You probably haven’t pleasured yourself before. Go ask any SPC, and they’ll teach you. Fuck, I’ve wasted so much time. This is dumb.”
“Hey—”
“No offense. Hey, but your fault for not getting used to it quick enough. I’ve done what I could. I’m off. The ladies are waiting for me. Remember—this is no different from a game.”
With a whoop, Stonneran pranced through the room and flew down the steps before Elias could shout something. He pulled his hand back, which had extended almost instinctively. Had Stonneran been that angry at him, enough to cuss? But the guy had looked more cheerful than anything. He didn’t get it, not the sex, not the cussing, not the things adults did.
His parents weren’t like this. Jewel’s parents weren’t like this.
Or maybe they were different when he hadn’t been looking. He remembered one of the many arguments his parents had had in the mornings, when he had been busy to escape. Something about doing it with data that weren’t real people.
He just didn’t know.
“I wish Crystal was here,” he muttered. The helpbot had all the answers, without limits now.
“Yes?” said Jewel’s voice. He nearly jumped from his seat, jerking his head around.
“Crystal?”
“I’m here,” replied his personal assistant.
“How are you here?”
“You did call for me verbally. I’m always available in the Otherworlds,” she stated, “except in some instances, like competitive tournaments. Other than that, I can help you discover everything about the worlds, answer every question you have in mind.”
In the middle of all of this, all of the things that were supposed to feel good but made him confused, unsure, even afraid maybe, he had Crystal. The pillar to lean on.
He smiled. “You have no idea how glad I am.”
“Sorry, but I am in your head. I do know, and well, thanks.”
He still couldn’t believe that she was just a program. She had evolved somehow, and today, she was more alive than anything.
“Right. So I take it that you’re aware of the current situation.”
“To the finest detail.”
He got up from his chair and began to walk. “So about Jewel, does she really want to, you know.”
“You know I can’t read other people’s minds. Not allowed.”
“But theoretically, if you were in her shoes.”
“Just guessing by the evidence? Yes, no doubt.”
He had reached the bottom floor and was making his way to the changing area. “I’ve told you about my parents and hers. They’re against this whole thing. You know, I should have taken your warning. Maybe plunging into this situation without knowing might have watered it down a little.”
“There’s no use crying over spilled milk.”
“I know. I’m repeating myself, but there was this mystifying element when I didn’t know the details. Now that I know, it scares me. Is that weird? Since guys are supposed to be into it.”
“Everyone has their circumstances. Even they were freaked out, all of them.”
“I thought you weren’t supposed to know?”
“Whoops, slip of tongue.”
It was stuff like this that made him wonder if there was an actual person behind the voice. It had been subtle at first, but sometimes, more often now, his helpbot would say something that she had claimed at first to go against her very nature.
“Anyways, I know there are rules. No violence, no stealing, etc. But what’s the rule for things like this?”
“The Otherworlds represent freedom. The things you mentioned, they don’t apply in most of the Otherworlds. Because the absence of rules creates excitement and fun.”
“I can see that.” He was taking off his robes now and had switched to speaking out loud in his head. “But there’s marriage, and there are families. With sex being at the center of that, is it okay to do what we’re doing here?”
“You’d need to digest a lot of papers to answer that question. Generally, it’s looked down upon. Realistically? Everyone has their secrets. And,” she said, focusing on the word, “you aren’t married. Strictly speaking, you have no responsibility for anything.”
“Yeah, I never did get that too. Responsibility. Are there rules for that kind of thing?”
“Of course. Becoming married means sharing responsibilities. Having children means taking on even more.”
“I’ve heard about that. How having kids is a lot of work.”
“Which is why some people don’t get married and change their partners every once in a while.”
He wrapped a sizable towel around his waist and headed to the hot spring. The separated one. Thankfully, most of the guys were there. Probably didn’t want to be labeled as a pervert straight off the bat.
“That sounds tragic. Not romantic at all. You’re the only one I’m saying this to, but I know I can live with Jewel for the rest of my life. She’s the only one for me.”
“I’m happy you feel that way.”
Hearing it said in Jewel’s voice made it that much better.
He dipped his feet in the steaming water and sharply retracted. It was hot, and it smelled like eggs. Strong eggs. But it wasn’t a bad smell, just a little thick and slimy for his nose. After a few jabs and splashes with his feet, he submerged his legs in the water and felt the warmth seep into his bones. A few seconds after, only his head and shoulders were out of the water, his towel wrapped around his head.
He rubbed his fingers together. The water was slippery.
He spotted his friends and waddled his way to them. All of them had their eyes closed and were leaning back on a row of strategically placed boulders. Feeling a little mischievous, he splashed some water on Terral, who shuddered and let his towel fall in the water.
“Dude! My towel,” he complained, raising an arm.
With a mighty sweep, he sent a wave of water flying towards Elias, who raised his hands to protect himself, laughing. The other guys joined in on the fun, and soon, everyone was splashing away, hollering and whooping like the boys they were.
Except that it didn’t happen. Terral was pointing at the walls, with a scowl that told Elias to quit whatever he had in mind.
“We’re listening, so while I’m annoyed about my towel, sit,” he snapped, patting the seat next to him. Elias did as he was told, feeling abashed for not getting the reception he had wanted.
“So...what exactly are we listening for?” he asked.
“Girls.”
He shut up after that.
After a while, Stonneran spoke up. “Hear that? They’re finally coming out. Now’s the time to go.”
“That took way too long,” Monroy complained.
“Better than looking like a bunch of horny monkeys.”
Many of the other guys had already left, and Elias’s friends began to get up and make their way out of the bath.
“You’re going back in?” he asked.
“No.” It was Stonneran, who had covered his groin with his towel. The others were doing the same. “See that dangling flap over there? It’s another entrance to the central area. Much more convenient in my opinion, since the additional facilities are that way.”
“Why say this now?”
“Hey, close friends get privileges. It doesn’t really matter since a little walk will let you see everything, but appearances. Right?”
They left, which made Elias and Noza the only ones by the boulders.
“You’re not going?” Elias said, turning to Noza.
“Not now. Waiting for everyone to settle,” came the brief reply. “You?”
“I don’t know. Probably waiting for Jewel’s message to come,” he sighed.
“You guys didn’t talk this over? That’s a surprise.”
“It was a little sudden, yeah.”
A sudden, sharp terror filled his head. If Jewel went out now, everyone would be able to see her. The more he thought about it, the worse it seemed. Like some implanted instinct, he couldn’t bear the idea of allowing anyone to see her naked. It felt wrong.
“You know what, thanks, Noza,” he briskly said, standing up. “I think I know what to do now.”
“Well, if it helped,” his friend nodded. “Good luck.”
“You too.”
Elias retreated into the building again, briefly drying his body with a towel before the cold got to him. As he slid on his robes, he asked Crystal to send a message to Jewel, asking how she was doing. When he received her reply a couple of seconds later, saying that she was fine, he asked her to meet him at the entrance again. She agreed with a ‘sure’, and a few minutes of waiting with his arms crossed finally let him reorganize his thoughts before Jewel came emerged from the other side.
She wasn’t smiling, nor was she making a bad face. Her long, wet hair clung to her skin and nape, but not so wet to make it drip. Elias averted her eyes from her slightly exposed bosom, where the loose cloth drooped dangerously, delicately. When he looked into her eyes, she stared back tenderly, then lowered her gaze. He did the same.
Something was brewing inside of his heart, and he didn’t know what. No, he didn’t want to know. There was a reason why vulgar language was associated with all of this. Even if he couldn’t grasp the whole picture, something told him that he had to evacuate, to leave before something happened.
He resisted gawking too much. His father’s words echoed in his mind.
“So? Why’d you call me?” Jewel said, almost in a playful manner. Holding her arms behind her back, she approached him, shifting in her steps. “Should we get a room where we can talk? You look nervous, Elias.”
“There’s no one here anyway. Mind hearing me out a little?”
She nodded.
He took in a sharp breath. “I’m...not so sure about this. This feels wrong. Even if it’s taking place here, the Otherworlds,” he shook his head, “I don’t know. My parents told me to be careful. Your parents—”
His voice was cut off with Jewel’s finger placed on his lips. “Remember the first date we had? After school ended?” she recounted, leaning her forehead against his chest. “I send you a message.”
“I remember.”
“I feel that way right now.”
Elias swallowed, daring not to move or speak.
“So, could you do something?”
There was a stop, a delicate silence that hung in the air afterwards. Elias felt all the words he had planned crumble away, his brain melting, the sound of his blood pounding in his ears. All of which wasn’t supposed to happen here, but it did. He blamed Stonneran for making the world too realistic.
“I don’t know what to do,” he whispered. He felt Jewel’s body shift a fraction, but she remained unmoved. Swallowing again, he repeated, “I really don’t know what to do.”
“You didn’t see the video?” Her voice was quiet.
He flinched. “I did. Once. But not all the way through.”
“It doesn’t matter. We can learn. Together.”
He felt his confidence fade away. “I might disappoint you.”
Maybe if he had said things differently, they could have figured out a solution, come to an agreement of sorts. But he was shaken, and so was she. Their minds were full of uncertain fever, and they both failed to speak, their emotions gripping on tightly.
“This isn’t fair,” Jewel muttered, stepping away. “You’re the one who’s supposed to do what I’m doing.” She cleared her throat. “I know my parents won’t approve.”
“Then—”
She sent him a dejected stare. “Is it that bad for me to want to further our relationship?”
He couldn’t speak.
“I’m scared I might disappoint you. Stonneran said...he said you wouldn’t care. He said you’d want me.”
The air felt numb to his skin.
“Maybe…you don’t—”
“No. No! That’s not it,” Elias said, grabbing her hands. “I—I want to be together with you. But this feels too fast. It was only yesterday for me that I actually got to—”
“It was months for me. I waited so long.” Her voice trembled. “Why did you agree to come here?”
He was thinking of a thousand excuses. “Because you were coming. I couldn’t leave you alone.”
“I wouldn’t have come if you hadn’t agreed.”
We can leave now, he wanted to say. But his lips refused to move. Was it shame? Regret?
“Jewel—”
“F-fine, sorry that I was so sudden. You’re not ready,” she sniffed. “I know that I’m not ready.”
“That’s not what I meant.”
“Then what do you mean?”
I’ve already said it, he wanted to say. This whole situation feels amiss. But that would be the same as denouncing the whole class, not to say that Stonneran was wrong. And he had always been in the right. He had helped Jewel find him, and Jewel herself was on good terms with the guy. Some time ago, she had asked him to understand his eccentricities when Elias had voiced his complaints. That he didn’t mean anything bad.
She sighed when he couldn’t come up with an answer. “Okay, I get it. We need practice.”
“Practice,” he repeated.
She looked at him. “I don’t mind. The SPCs here are good instructors, I’ve heard.”
“You’re suggesting that we…” he trailed off, unable to finish the sentence.
“That, or we...learn together?” Her eyes fluttered over him. She looked so expectant, sounded so hopeful. Let’s get out, do something else. Saying that would betray her wishes, backtrack their relationship instead of improving it. For the first time in his life, he hated being born from an incubator. He hated the dampeners that rendered him immobile in understanding Jewel’s desires. Most of all, he hated himself for being so afraid, so unsure of the consequences that could follow—and for the millionth time, he could hear his parents arguing, roaring in the back of his mind.
He shook his head weakly and felt his heart tear apart when a gloomy shadow crossed Jewel’s face.
“Okay.” A pause. “See you in two hours.” She headed back into the changing room, leaving him gripping his fists under his robe where she couldn’t see. He felt like he had missed his chance to catch her. It felt like an hour had passed before he gained the strength to take a step.
He jumped after spotting the receptionist who was watching him. Her silver hair swayed as she sat up elegantly.
“Do you require a partner?” she asked, catching him off guard. He dumbly gawked for a few seconds before flushing and shaking his head violently.
“No! Sorry,” he muttered, not sure why he felt apologetic. Grunting, he hastened his steps and half-stormed out of the building to clear his mind of all the things he was feeling. These so-called dampeners didn’t do anything to help him think clearly, not in this situation. He didn’t even call for Crystal for advice. He wanted to be alone.
Like everyone says, it’s just a simulation. A game of sorts. Whatever we do here, it won’t matter one single bit. Oh, but his mom had cared. I can be better than her. Remember what his dad had said? Consequences that would last a decade. He agreed with his mom now, and they had become lovey-dovey again. But this is about Jewel, not them. And her parents? They’d have a lot to say about this.
If it wasn’t wrong, why did he feel so uncomfortable about it?
By the time he realized it, he was circling the tall fence that enclosed the resort, nearly stomping in his steps as he trudged on. The cold air felt refreshing, but he tightened his clothes around him. After a certain distance, trees had filled the vicinity, along with small animals that scurried along the earth and branches.
It was another world, separated from the inside. Having nothing better to do, he ventured out. A couple of strides put him within the thicket, and a couple more almost hid the fence behind him. He could see that Stonneran had lied in a way; this place was supposed to be very realistic, but all he could feel under his bare feet was the soft, clean grass. No dirt soiled his feet, no squishes of mud invaded his toes. There wasn’t even a single fallen branch or rock that threatened to scratch his skin, nor bugs that could gross him out.
He stared at a bird that was staring at him. It cocked its head. Elias shouted, and it flew away.
He sighed. His legs aimlessly wandered through the forest, closer to the mountains he saw in the distance. Before he knew it, the trees had thinned out, and he found himself at the edge of a cliff that dropped down deep enough to make his head spin. There was a river encircling the mesa, separating him from the mountains. Well, that and the drop.
There was no one out there besides him. The solitude was calming, and he momentarily let himself forget about his worries while strolling by the edge. He was free from that sulfuric smell, from that humid place that made his head spin. Even the cold didn’t bother him as much now.
He walked, enjoying the vastness of the world. For what seemed like a very long time, he walked. The ground felt right. The air felt right. He longed to travel to the other side where his worries would be further away.
A rustle startled him. He almost tripped when a white blur scurried across his vision, making a yelp as it did.
“Fox!” he exclaimed.
Not wanting to lose the rare animal, he ran after it, dodging the trees and ducking under their branches. The white fluff only moved faster, making Elias seriously concentrate to keep up. His training had some use after all.
The fox suddenly took a right, disappearing into a bush that obscured his vision. He hesitated, stopping to catch his breath. He noticed that the rapid footsteps of the animal had stopped, so he crouched to see if it was still inside the bush.
There it was, eyeing him cautiously. He couldn’t help but smile.
“Here, little guy. Come,” he beckoned putting one hand forward. The fox growled in response, backing away deeper into the bush. It’d be terrible if he scared the animal away since he loved pets. A shame his parents had never let him have any.
“Crystal, could you bring out some food? Anything meaty,” he asked in a low voice. He didn’t dare to move a muscle.
“That would be against this world’s rules,” she stated. “But I’ll make it an exception.”
“You can do that?”
“Yes. But don't tell anyone, okay?”
He nodded, at least in his head. Something flickered, and he felt his outstretched hand dip from the weight of the object. A chunk of steak, warm and steaming in the cold air, dripping with juices. Did the fox lick its lips?
He carefully approached the bush with the offering in his hand, crawling. When the fox twitched, he stopped and lowered his hand more to the ground.
“Come, I got food,” he said softly.
They stood there for a good half a minute before Crystal’s voice butted in. “They’re generally very shy. Turn your head away, and it might approach you.
He did as he was told and looked to the side. Just when he was worried that the fox had run away, he felt something touch the meat, then felt it slide off from his hand.
When he managed a peek through the corner of his eye, the animal was chewing away at the food as it held it in place with its small paws. It was too cute to look and he found himself staring in awe.
The fox growled with its teeth halfway into the steak.
Elias turned his head around again, and the growl stopped. But he continued to peek. The food was gone in minutes, and the little beast licked its lips, displaying a neat row of small, pointy teeth. Then it eyed him.
“You want more?” Elias said. The fox just stood there.
“I’ll take that as a yes.”
Instantly, he had a patty ready on his hand. Same as before, he stretched his hand out to the animal, but this time, he didn’t turn his head. Instead, he narrowed his eyes.
The fox dithered, sticking its head out then retracting, testing the waters before it moved.
“It’s alright,” Elias urged.
Slowly, its paws inched forward. The beast shivered as it came, eyeing Elias cautiously for any signs of attack.
Elias almost cried in joy when the animal began to eat from his hand.
“You’ve made a friend,” Crystal congratulated happily.
“It won’t run away now?” Elias asked.
“Not unless you kick it, no.”
It made him happy, and he was surprised at how easy it had been to tame an animal. Carefully, he used his other hand to brush the fox’s head. It flinched, but otherwise remained still, still eating. He grinned.
With the food gone, the fox began to jump around him, barking as it did. It sounded more like a dog trying to laugh. Gekkering—he found out when he asked his helpbot. He laughed and pet the fox, and it wiggled through his legs playfully, pushing its head against his hands in earnest.
“You’re so cute!” he cried. It had been a long time since he had cuddled an animal, and that had been during the break when he and Jewel were getting to know each other. “What’s your name?”
The fox tittered, shaking its whole body. Without answering, it leapt to the side and began to scamper away, only stopping to look back at Elias. When he followed, the fox advanced again, then stopped to look back.
“You want me to follow,” he said.
While it didn’t say anything, Elias got the feeling that the fox grinned. He started to run after the fox, which hastened its steps deeper into the woods. He was lost in a way now, but he’d find his way back easily enough. He’d simply have to go towards the center.
The trees thickened to the point where he couldn’t sprint without running into one. Protruding roots threatened to trip him, and low branches constantly slapped him in the face with their leaves. But the fox was patient, always waiting when he got stuck, looking at him to follow along. He didn’t know why he was following anymore.
Anything to get away from my insecurities, he thought. It was exciting in a way, going somewhere unknown.
It was somewhat of a letdown when he spotted the edge again. There would be nowhere else to go from here. But the fox continued to run, jumping straight into a large, thick tree whose trunk absorbed it whole. Elias blinked twice. The fox had just vanished.
He slowed to a halt in front of the tree, scrutinizing the object for any signs of an entrance. There were none, and its bark looked more solid than anything. Disappointed, he leaned against the section of the tree where he had last seen the fox enter.
Or would have—if he didn’t fall through, landing flat on his chest.
Despite the lack of pain, he groaned, looking up as he balanced himself. Behind him, there was a flat wall that looked suspiciously like bark. Before long, he saw a set of mischievous eyes studying him, a tail that swished impatiently in the air. The fox.
“A secret entrance?” he asked, expecting no reply.
“Clumsy, clumsy, clumsy,” someone giggled. He looked around abruptly to see who it had been but didn’t find anyone.
“And dumb too? My, my, my, maybe I shouldn’t have brought you here.”
Finally figuring out the source of the voice, he couldn’t help but feel a deep sense of astonishment from the situation. The fox was speaking to him, and observing its paw on top of that, licking it.
“You’re speaking,” he said.
“Yes, and you’re goggling, gazing, not glaring.”
At a loss for words, Elias directed his thoughts to Crystal as the animal went on cleaning itself. What’s going on? Stonneran didn’t say anything about this.
“This shouldn’t be happening, and yet, it has,” she said in an instant. “The parent world has bled into the replica.”
“The parent world? What are you talking about?”
“The resort and the area surrounding it is a small copy of an Otherworld, World 84 to be exact. This fox shouldn’t have been there. The connection should have been blocked. There shouldn’t have been any entrances.”
“Entrance? You mean the tree?”
“It seems so.”
“Wait,” he grunted, trying to follow. “What exactly is this place? And why is it connected to this World 84?”
“Would you like the long or simple explanation?”
“Simple, please.”
She went on. “There isn’t nearly enough space for everyone to have their very own personal world. As such, parts of an Otherworld are rented, like the one you were in.”
“You’re speaking in past tense.”
“Because right now, you are in World 84. Or Talanim, if you prefer the name.”
“I—what? Really?” He looked back at the wall and furrowed his eyebrows.
“Don’t worry, you can always go back. The path is there and will be as long as I keep an eye on it. But it is strange.” Elias could imagine her frowning by the tone of her voice. “Being a copy, the world you were in should be running in parallel with the parent world, preventing any connections.”
As if interrupting the helpbot and breaking her logical reasoning, the small fox shook its head with impatience and approached Elias to nip the bottom of his robe. It pulled on it vigorously before letting go, nudging its head towards the cliff, which—Elias saw—had some kind of platform at the edge. Stairs?
“Follow me,” the fox said, hopping away, stopping to look back. “Are you coming? Come, chase.” It had a childish playfulness to it like it was daring Elias to catch it. As much as he wanted to, he hesitated.
“Go. It’s safe,” Crystal told him. “While this situation was unexpected, it isn’t threatening.”
That was the cue that cut the last threads hanging him back. Smiling with boyish glee, he went after the talking beast that had descended the stairs. Going down, he could see the extensive hanging bridge connecting the mountains with the small platform at the bottom of the stairs. The end of the bridge was covered with fog. What lay beyond was a mystery.
“Come, it’ll be fun!” said the fox.
He left, leaving everything behind at the back of his head.