Novels2Search

Chapter Thirty-four: Crush

Day Twenty-two of Surveillance:

Keiko’s POV:

A week quickly passed on by, meaning that it had now officially been seven days since Kira started killing criminals again. Keiko was still left with way more questions than answers. Not only that, but she was still uncertain about how she was supposed to think or feel about anything. Nothing was making any sense anymore. Not that it had been making a lot of sense in the first place, because it felt like the whole Kira investigation had been one big mess after another.

Keiko had now spent months working on the investigation. All she wanted to do was solve the case once and for all. Throughout the investigation, she had been hoping for the best: that her ex-boyfriend wasn’t Kira, that they could find out who Kira actually was, and put the case to rest.

That certainly would have been the best case scenario.

However, her dream world had been shattered once she had seen Light and Misa kissing. After that little incident, Keiko couldn’t keep on ignoring the fact that her ex-boyfriend was the primary suspect in the Kira case any longer.

She had to face the hard truth. L was positive that Misa Amane was the Second Kira and the evidence was stacked up high against Light Yagami. That meant that not only was her ex-boyfriend a cheater, but it was also very likely that he was also Kira.

This was the truth that Keiko had finally resolved herself to think, and now here she was, watching Light during his confinement only to find out that Kira was still killing criminals. Something that her ex-boyfriend was unable to do in his current situation. It was quite a lot for her to take in.

Not only that, but now, despite the countless hours she and the rest of the Task Force had spent working on the case, it felt like they were now backtracking. It felt like they were right back where they started.

Did this mean that Light Yagami was fully innocent?

Maybe so, but maybe not. However, it was worth noting that there was no way for him to kill any criminals during his confinement. Keiko knew that was impossible. She supposed that there was still a chance he could have been Kira or been acting as Kira prior to his confinement but that didn’t make much sense to her. It could have been like Light said, he could have been framed, but that also made no sense to her.

If only we had some sort of idea of how Kira kills…it’s clear that he doesn’t have to be physically present to make a death happen, but that makes no sense. Is it like a superpower? Does such a power even exist? If so, the power to kill people is something no human should have, it would only corrupt people. It doesn’t make logical sense as a superpower, but it also doesn’t make logical sense how all of these criminals are dying of heart attacks. Without knowing how Kira kills, will we even be able to find Kira?

Without knowing how Kira killed, Light was in the gray. Not fully guilty of being Kira, but also not fully innocent either. The evidence had pointed to him pretty well up until that point, but had they missed something?

What if Light really was innocent?

Keiko toyed with that idea for a moment. If Light was innocent, would that mean someone had really framed him? If so, that would have been pretty impressive. She supposed that it was probably more likely that he was previously acting as Kira. If he was previously Kira, then why wasn’t he still Kira? Then again, if he had been Kira then why would he be willing to go under surveillance? Why would he risk being caught like that?

It was enough to drive Keiko crazy. Neither extreme fully made sense, but how could Light be somewhere in the middle?

She also couldn’t deny that she still felt something for Light. A part of her, though it was small, still missed him. After all, it had only been about a month, though it felt like longer, since she had broken up with him. Despite the miniscule part of her that missed him, Keiko knew that it would be foolish of her to take him back. There was no way she could do that knowing it was still likely he could be Kira, not to mention knowing that he had more than most likely cheated on her with Misa Amane.

It just wasn’t worth it.

Keiko was working on squashing the small part of her that still missed him. She was working on fully getting over Light Yagami. She figured that it would be best for her, and best for the Kira case in general, that she moved on. Besides, if it turned out that Light really was Kira, that would only mean that he had been using her from the very beginning.

Admittedly, getting over Light Yagami hadn’t been an easy task for her. However, working with a certain raven haired detective made it much, much easier. She had to admit that she felt rather drawn to him. It could have just been a crush born from her admiration for him as a detective, but it was still a crush all the same.

He was rather mysterious, and it was just enough for her to be rather curious about him.

It blew her mind that she knew next to nothing about him and yet all she could find herself thinking lately was the fact that, if she dared to, she could easily lean over and touch him, maybe even kiss him.

Not that she would ever dare to. She knew full well that it was off limits.

It was an act so simple, yet so complicated. An act that would have many consequences, both intended and unintended. She knew that a kiss between might make the investigation a little more awkward, but she also couldn’t stop herself from thinking about it. Not since that one night together. Their almost-kiss was now etched in her mind forever.

A part of her wanted to just lean over and kiss him. Then she could say she had kissed the world’s greatest detective. Then she could say for sure whether her crush on him was merely surface level or if there was something more. That would mean her curiosity would be, at least momentarily, quenched.

Another part of her wanted to kiss him just to see how he would react. Judging from how he guarded himself, she was almost certain that he had never kissed anyone before. It was clear that he was not used to being intimate with anyone, not even Watari. Therefore, she wondered how such an act would impact him.

How did he really feel about her? It appeared that he wasn’t affected by her in the slightest, judging by his cold exterior. However, she wanted to know if, deep down, there was a part of him that cared about her at all; a part of him that was just as curious as she was about how a kiss between them would feel like. A part of him that wanted to kiss her just as much as she wanted to kiss him.

She found herself being distracted by this thought often lately, even though the detective still frustrated her to no end. Perhaps it was just a way for her to stop thinking about Light and the Kira investigation for a moment, but it was a welcome distraction nonetheless.

Day Thirty-two of Surveillance:

Keiko’s POV:

Keiko let out a soft sigh, running a hand through her slightly tousled hair. It had now been a little over two weeks since Kira started killing again, and it looked like he had no intentions of slowing down. She still found herself unsure about what to think or how to feel in regards to the Kira investigation, or her personal life, for that matter. To be fair, the two seemed rather intertwined at the moment.

It was frustrating that a little over two weeks had passed on by and still nothing made sense. They didn’t even have any new leads to follow in case Light was innocent. Criminals kept on dying, but yet the investigation felt like it was slowing down. It had been two weeks of absolutely nothing.

In fact, Keiko wasn’t sure how much more of this she could take. It was the same thing every day, new criminals would die but there was no clue as to who Kira was. Even the times of death seemed to be completely random. With the complete lack of pattern coupled with the lack of a proper lead, there wasn’t much they could do.

Keiko felt that she was reaching her limit, she was itching for something new to happen. She could sense that the detective was itching for something new to happen as well, given his defeated behavior. Something had to change, that much was for sure.

But what…? It’s not like we can look for clues when there are none...however...

Keiko glanced over at the surveillance screens. She watched as her ex-boyfriend tossed and turned in his bed, seemingly unable to get comfortable. It was clear to her that he was as restless as she was.

If he’s truly guilty, how can we prove it from watching something like this? It’s not like he can kill criminals while under surveillance…therefore if he’s guilty then we can’t prove anything…and if he’s truly innocent then…

Keiko let out another soft sigh as Light once again switched his sleeping position, his eyes closed.

If he’s truly innocent then we need his help with solving the case. It’s clear the rest of us are getting nowhere…so wouldn’t it make sense to have extra brain power? Whether he’s guilty or innocent it seems there’s only one answer to our problem…it’s not like I want to be around him again but it appears that there’s no real way around it.

She knew that it would probably hurt to be around her ex-boyfriend once more, but she also knew that it would be best for the investigation. Knowing that, she decided that she couldn’t sit still any longer.

Keiko stood up from the couch and cleared her throat a moment in hopes of getting L’s attention. It was something that was becoming increasingly hard to do, as it seemed he paid little attention to anything but the surveillance feed anymore.

“Yes, is there something you wish to say, Kagami-san?” Keiko didn’t miss the quick glance that the raven haired detective shot her way. He had been sitting right next to her on the couch, casually flipping through some investigation papers. She could sense the boredom dripping in his tone.

“As a matter of fact, there is,” Keiko responded, a little bit of attitude seeping into her voice. It was nearing midnight and she was too tired to hide her annoyance with the way things were going any longer. There was a lot that she wanted to say, a lot that she just couldn’t hold in anymore.

“Is that so?” L lazily replied, his eyes not once leaving the paper he was looking at, “well, then, what is it?”

Keiko swallowed and stalled a moment, trying to pick her next words carefully. She wasn’t sure how the detective would handle the topic she was about to bring up.

L, however, didn’t bother to wait for a response, “wait...let me guess, it’s getting rather late for you...are you going to bed? If so, then goodnight.”

“No, I’m not going to bed quite yet, Ryuzaki-san,” Keiko replied, carefully studying the detective in front of her. She was hoping he would at least glance over at her again.

“Oh, is that so? What’s up?” L said, flipping the sheet of paper he was holding over, his attention once again not leaving said paper.

Keiko waited a few more seconds and let out a sigh once she realized that L still wouldn’t pay any real attention to her. She quickly realized that she needed to demand his attention in order to get him to hear her out.

Ensure your favorite authors get the support they deserve. Read this novel on Royal Road.

“Look, L, what I have to say is in regards to the investigation...so I’d appreciate it if I could have just a moment of your precious attention please,” Keiko snapped, unable to hide the snark in her voice.

She waited a moment, watching as L set the paper he had been holding on the table and slowly looked over at her.

“So she does get angry,” he mused, a half smile crossing his features for a moment as he studied her face. He then stood up and stretched before placing his hands in his pockets, “anyway, what is it? I’m sure you’re very well aware of the fact that nothing’s happened recently…”

“Exactly! Nothing’s happened, Ryuzaki-san! Nothing will continue to happen if we keep Light-kun and Misa-chan locked away in surveillance!” Keiko paused a moment to take a breath, “look, I know Light said not to let him out until we’re sure he’s innocent but it looks like that’s not possible at the moment. More criminals have been killed and are being killed and if he’s really innocent, then that means we’ve gotten nowhere in this investigation. Of course, we don’t know for sure if he’s innocent or not, sure, but if we keep him locked away then we’ll never know! We don’t even know how Kira kills yet…”

Keiko trailed off a moment, attempting to study L’s reaction. His expression was unreadable, but at least it was clear that he wasn’t going to cut her off again any time soon. She took that as her sign to keep on going.

Her voice was softer this time, “it’s been a little over two weeks now of the same exact thing. Ryuzaki-san, I know you might not want to let Light-kun or Misa-chan out, but if you continue to keep them under surveillance we won’t learn anything new. Something has to change. If anything, we can continue to keep an eye on them here at the hotel. I know I’m only a rookie detective and I have no right to be telling you what to do but please just consider it...and anyway, isn’t there a quote that says ‘insanity is doing the same thing over again and expecting different results’? In this case, insanity would be keeping them under surveillance. It’s already getting tiring and we’re wasting time.”

She could hear as L himself let out a small sigh, “Kagami-san, as well thought out as your points are, I’m afraid I can’t do that right now. It’s out of the question...”

Of course he refuses to listen to me…but I can’t let this stop me! I just can’t…if only I could get him to just consider it...

Keiko could feel her eyes starting to sting and she willed herself not to get too emotional as she continued on, “just what do you want, L? What is it exactly you’re trying to prove right now? That Light’s guilty? That Light Yagami is Kira? Whatever it is that you want to accomplish, we can’t accomplish it with Light under surveillance. Admittedly, I don’t know what to think about him anymore but I do know this; we can’t do much here without him, even if he is still a suspect in your eyes.”

“Kagami-san,” L started after a moment. His voice was level, “I understand where you’re coming from, but it’s only been two weeks since Kira started killing again-”

“A lot can happen in a span of two weeks! Let’s say that we keep Light under surveillance longer, what would that change? Criminals would continue to die and we would continue to get nowhere! We can’t waste anymore time! It’s clear to me that everyone else on the Task Force wants him out anyway. We could use his help with the investigation. And if he’s guilty, it’ll be much easier at this rate to prove with him right next to us instead of being locked away in surveillance!”

She could tell that L was about to speak once more, and judging from his expression, she already knew what he was going to say. However, there was still a lot more that she wanted to express. If he wasn’t going to listen to her properly then she had no choice but to make herself be heard.

To say that Keiko was frustrated would be an understatement, “dammit, L! Why won’t you even think about releasing him?! Could it perhaps be your pride? Would you see releasing Light from surveillance as losing because you’ve never been wrong about a case before? Is that also why you’ve been so mopey lately?! Because Kira killed again and we have nothing to convict Light with? Is that truly what’s most important to you right now?”

She took a short pause to collect her breath before continuing on, “look, I know the others see Light as innocent now, but if you really think he’s guilty then it’s clear we won’t be able to prove that if he’s under surveillance. And think about his father for goodness sake! You know Yagami-san won’t budge unless you release his son. Are you really going to keep torturing Light’s father, who could also be helping us investigate, just because of your own useless, stubborn pride?! What kind of person are you? Why are you being so selfish?”

Keiko carefully studied the raven haired detective as he stood, a little hunched over, right in front of her. He appeared to be rather calm, despite her rather harsh accusations. His mouth opened slightly, but then he closed it as though he had decided she wasn’t worth responding to. She wasn’t sure what she expected from him, but it wasn’t that. A mixture of both disappointment and anger coursed through her veins.

What kind of reaction is that?! What, is it because I’m technically just a rookie? Am I not even worthy of a response? Is he not taking me seriously right now?!

There wasn’t much more that she could do. Keiko just shook her head, starting to turn around as she muttered, “you know what? I think I get it…what do I know compared to you, right? I’m just Keiko Kagami, my opinion doesn’t even matter. Right now, I’m a nobody…not a proper detective, not even a proper college student. I’m just wasting my time trying to-”

“I’ll consider it.”

Those three little words caused Keiko to break out of her self pity party. His voice was soft, but unmistakable.

“H-huh?” she lamely stuttered out as she turned around, finding herself nearly face to face with the world’s greatest detective.

The two were only a couple steps away, something that Keiko was now becoming hyper-aware of. She could feel the butterflies in her stomach starting to take flight, and she swallowed hard in a futile attempt to make them go away. Not only that, but she could feel her mind going blank as the detective stepped forward, decreasing the space between between them even more.

“I’ll consider it, Kagami-san,” he repeated.

He’s so close!

Keiko opened her mouth to respond to him, but found that she was unable to properly produce any sound, something that she blamed entirely on L. His dark eyes were staring straight at her and she felt as though he could see straight into her soul. It was enough to slowly drive her crazy.

The detective took this as an opportunity to continue on, his voice still rather soft, “to be honest, I’m not sure what to make of the situation...therefore, I’ll consider it. I’ll consider letting them out of confinement, but if I do, they’ll still be under constant surveillance so we can carefully monitor them.”

“T-thank you, perhaps it’ll be better that way,” Keiko managed to stutter out. She had to look away a moment, as looking into his eyes was making her go crazy, “and anyway, if they’re guilty then they can’t hide it for long. If not, then at least Light can go back to helping us with the investigation.”

“Yes,” L mused, “and Kag-no, Keiko-chan?”

Oh no…why’d he drop the formality all of the sudden?

“Y-yes?” Keiko could feel her heart starting to race as he said her name. She wasn’t sure what he was going to say next, but she was sure that if he got any closer to her that she was simply going to explode. It was torturous.

As if he could read her mind, the world’s greatest detective took a final step forward, shortening the distance between them even more. The two of them were so close that she could feel the warmth radiating off his body. Not only that, but she could also feel his breath as it tickled her cheek. He was so close to her. She was almost certain that he could hear her heart as it quickly beat in her chest. It was painfully obvious how much he was affecting her, and there was no way she could could hide it. Not with the way her cheeks were flaming.

The conversation came to a halt. L was just silently standing there, studying her, taking her all in. Keiko was finding it rather hard to think straight, or even think at all.

The detective slowly reached a hand out from his pocket, carefully gauging Keiko’s reaction as he brushed aside a runaway strand of her that had gotten in the way of her eyes. Keiko swore for a moment that her heart almost leapt out of her chest.

“You’re not a nobody,” L said softly after a few seconds. His voice was so soft that, despite the fact that the two were face to face, only mere centimeters away, Keiko had to strain to hear him. It was as though he was letting her in on some sort of state secret.

“I-” Keiko started to say but then she stopped, unsure how to respond to his comment.

He leaned in, still continuing to speak in a hushed tone that Keiko had to strain to hear, “you’ll never be a nobody. I know you’ll be a great detective someday…you already are.”

Is the world’s greatest detective really giving me a compliment right now? …is this perhaps his way of showing he cares? If so, what does this mean?

The two of them were so close together that their noses met. Keiko jerked back a little at the sudden unexpected touch, as did L, whose eyes were slightly widened. However, she found herself wanting more. She found herself wanting to be that close to him again, and perhaps be even closer.

Keiko instinctively leaned in, slowly working on closing the gap between them again.

“L,” she breathed. All she wanted to do in that moment was have a little taste of him. Was she going crazy or did it look like he almost wanted her as well?

Her eyes slowly fluttered close, and she found herself leaning forward even more. Soon their noses were touching once again, but this time L didn’t pull away. Before she knew it, her lips lightly brushed up against his. Keiko felt L hesitate a little at first, his body slightly freezing up, but he still didn’t pull away from her. Taking that as a positive sign, she decided to give into temptation, fully kissing the world’s greatest detective. Moments later, she felt L give in as well, his lips pressing up against hers with a sense of urgency.

A rush of energy coursed through Keiko’s body. It was as though a pulse of electricity had zapped her. Keiko melted into the kiss, running a hand through his disheveled hair. She felt him hesitantly wrap his arm around her waist, slowly pulling her even closer to him, causing her to feel the warmth radiating from his body.

Part of her wondered if this was actually happening, if it wasn’t just a dream. It seemed almost too good to be true-sharing a kiss with the world’s greatest detective. She wished that the moment would last forever, but she knew full well that good moments had an expiration date.

Sure enough, after what felt like much too soon, the detective pulled away from her, leaving a rather breathless Keiko.

Did that really just happen?

Keiko’s eyes fluttered open. Her mind was still reeling, not to mention she also felt a little dizzy. She noticed that the detective looked a little spaced out himself, his eyes wide open with disbelief.

“This...should have never happened…” L muttered quietly, suddenly dropping his hand from Keiko’s waist. She didn’t miss the uncertainty in his voice, though she did find herself missing the warmth she experienced when his arm was wrapped around her only moments ago.

“Wha-wait, what do you mean?” Keiko softly questioned, still feeling more than a little dazed, to say the least. She watched as the detective took a few steps back, slightly turning away from her. She could feel her heart steadily dropping in her chest as she watched him stiffen once more, his face becoming emotionless.

“This was a mistake. I should’ve never let things get this far,” L responded, causing Keiko’s heart to drop even more.

What does that even mean?! Was this yet another game of his, another test? Is the kiss the ‘mistake’ he’s referring to? On that note, did he really mean what he said beforehand? If he didn’t...then I was just fooled once again...does he think I’m a fool?

Keiko could feel her good mood dropping rapidly.

I suppose I am...I knew full well that nothing good would come of this, and yet...here I am...feeling things. I suppose I can’t deny it anymore after what just happened.

She pulled a sour face, “well, it’s a little late for that now, isn’t it? Are you admitting that even a great detective like yourself makes mistakes?”

L’s voice was soft once again, and barely audible, “I never claimed to be perfect, Kagami-san.”

“This is just one big game to you, isn’t it?” Keiko could feel the tears as they started to sting her eyes. She brushed them away, hoping that L couldn’t see them, though she was sure that he still could. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw the detective open his mouth to speak once more, but she was no longer in the mood to listen to anything he had to say.

“Whatever,” she huffed, turning around to walk towards the door leading to her hotel room, “forget it, it doesn’t matter. I guess I am going to bed.”

L’s POV:

L watched as the girl stormed out of the hotel room. He could feel the tightness increasing in his chest, something that he was working hard to ignore.

It’s for the best, he told himself, she doesn’t truly hold any feelings for me anyway. I’m sure it’ll pass, especially if I do let Light out of surveillance...therefore, it doesn’t matter how I feel or how I don’t feel in regards to Keiko Kagami. It doesn’t matter whether I care for her or not...what matters most is the investigation.

The detective figured if he just continued to act normal around Keiko that his feelings for her would diminish, but it appeared they were going nowhere. This was something that rather frustrated him. The Kira investigation was already not going too well, and adding feelings into the mix would only complicate things further. He knew that full well.

He had lost control earlier. It had been a momentary lapse in judgement, nothing more. It couldn’t mean anything more. He couldn’t afford that, especially considering what was at stake with the investigation.

However, now that he had had a taste, he wanted nothing more than to feel her lips against his once more but he knew it was unrealistic.

I shouldn’t have been that selfish in the first place...but...there’s just something about her.

He squashed that thought right away.

It was a mistake and I cannot let that happen again...I’ve gotten too comfortable around her, but I have a case to focus on...as always, the case comes first. I can’t afford to fall in love.