I'm going to be a crazy person.

I fell in love with a woman who had been my best friend since school. Her warm and cheerful personality made me unable to stop desire to stay with her.

Since I knew the meaning of that feeling, I always approached it without hesitation. Like an insect that comes to fire even though it knows it will burn its body. I knew that she wouldn't see me as someone worthy enough to love.

But I don't want to give up. Not this time. I chased her and approached her whenever I had the chance. Keep going and keep chasing it.

When I feel confident, I express my feelings.

She rejected me.

She made a troubled face when she saw me, she also apologized for not being able to reciprocate my feelings. Indeed she is a good person.

I've imagined this before, but it hurts more than I thought.

I went to an unhealthy place that night. Drink and drink until I forget everything. Until I lost my mind. And I completely lost my mind.

I don't know how I got to this hotel, I don't know how this woman got next to me. But what is clear is that we have done things we should not have done.

I saw a messy room, lots of scattered objects, clothes everywhere, and traces of blood that seemed to come from this woman's intimate parts.

I slapped my cheek. What actually happened? Why did I do this? Why do I vent my sadness to others?

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Disappointment began to cover my sadness.

This feeling of disappointment grew and increased when I found out this woman was pregnant with my child a few months later.

At first I didn't believe it and rejected it a little. But that woman was more devastating than me.

I can't deny it anymore and am willing to be responsible. I went to her house to continue with the wedding. After receiving some hurtful remarks from her family and some beatings, they allowed me.

However, the woman refused. She still couldn't believe she was pregnant and couldn't achieve her dreams.

I didn't give up. I never submitted responsibility at will. I accompanied her and took care of her.

Several times she tried to kill the child. Several times she tried to kill himself. Her family and I took turns looking after her around the clock.

But as the baby approaches birth. She managed to hurt herself. This situation causes babies to be born into this world more quickly.

It's a healthy baby girl. I asked her to marry me again after the baby was born. Again she refused.

I am not angry. It's hard to accept reality when our dreams are shattered.

That afternoon, she showed a change. She has some wishes in life and wants to see our child. I gladly gave her the opportunity to hold our daughter.

But she opened his arms after a while. Reflexively I immediately opened my arms to hold the baby. Luckily our daughter didn't fall to the floor or she would have experienced something painful.

I was furious at that time. I shouted at her. Like a bomb that had been buried for a long time and exploded, I vented a lot of my dissatisfaction.

How can a mother drop her own child?

Doesn't she have affection for her?

Even though the child was born not because of our will, the child was born. The child was a living human being and he himself gave birth to it.

I really don't understand.

I focused on calming our crying child and when I realized, the woman had disappeared.