Over the course of winter Alqa, like most of the Yisra, spent most of her time huddled in her yurt for warmth. With most of the wild game hibernating, large scale hunts were rare during the winter. Extra water was collected by melting snow and mixing the water with vinegar, which Yesui told her was how the Honey-eaters drank their water. Gone were the days of drinking gusui, there were no more mares producing milk. Winter was always miserable and this year was no different. About three-fourths through the winter, Alqa had a dream where she was sitting in the middle of a burnt out Yisra, her hands were covered in blood and at her feet lay her parents. She had killed them and their blood was on her hands. All around her was blood and she could see her face in it, the face of a coward. She ran, she should have saved them. She could see Agaa Iija and Taimgra calling her to maintain the balance, blood must have blood. Erkhe amudrul amudrul, she heard it in the dream and it sounded so real but it wasn’t. Alqa awoke, it was the middle of the night and she was extremely cold, but she didn’t sleep anymore that night and she kept hearing the voice in her head repeating that phrase, erkhe amudrul amudrul.
In the morning, Alqa was still awake but was tired. Nevertheless, she dragged herself up and went outside, it was snowing again. Alqa went to Nergui to make sure she was warm before returning to her yurt to find Dagan fully awake and clearly bored. “Good morning Dagan,” Alqa said as she entered the yurt. Dagan ignored her but she sat down cross-legged across from him anyway. “How are you?” she asked. Dagan mumbled a reply. “That good, huh?” Alqa responded, “well, I’ll tell you what. I don’t have anything to do today. I’ll hang out with you,” Dagan stared at her before speaking.
“No,” he said.
“No?” Alqa asked, surprised.
“I don’t want to,” Dagan said.
“Well what do you want to do?” Alqa asked.
“Play with the other children,” Dagan whined.
“I don’t think that’s an option right now,” Alqa told him.
“Then I am going to sit here and not move,” Dagan stated.
“Ok, you do that,” Alqa told him as she stood up.
Alqa left the yurt and went to find Sugekui. She went to his yurt and knocked but he wasn’t there, so she wandered around in the cold for a bit before Kaapek stopped her. “Good day to you Alqa,” Kaapek said.
“Hi Kaapek,” Alqa responded politely.
“What are you doing out in the snow?” he asked her.
“I’m looking for Sugekui,”Alqa explained.
“He’s in with Rynyna at her yurt, do you know where that is?” Kaapek told her.
“Yes, thanks Kaapek,” Alqa said and walked away towards Rynyna’s yurt. She stood outside and asked if she could come in.
“Yes, you may Alka,” Rynyna replied. Alqa opened the flap, quickly entered and shut the flap behind her. “Hello Alka, what can I do for you?” Rynyna asked.
Before Alqa could reply, Sugekui spoke first, “Alqa should learn some Rovoai’Omila! Don’t you agree Alqa?”
“If that is what Alku wants to do, Sougykoi,” Rynyna told Sugekui. She turned to Alqa, “Would you like to learn a little Alka?” she asked. Alqa nodded. The first lesson involved learning the basics of writing. She learned the twenty-seven letters and started writing with them. By the end of winter, she could write enough words to form a few sentences.
After that first nightmare, Alqa spent many nights having difficulty sleeping. She felt as if she couldn’t talk to anyone about it and every night she would lie awake thinking about its. She was a coward, she wanted revenge, this was all her fault. When spring finally came, Alqa was relieved, mainly because the Yisra was moving. They spent all day preparing to move, and then the next they woke up before sun-up and took down the yurts and fences. They mounted their horses, some took the reins of the surplus horses and everybody took turns driving the goats. They ran around the back of the goat herd with a long whip and if a goat every got out of the group, they whipped it until it returned to its place. For two days they traveled northwest like this until Buqutai ordered everybody to stop.
They spent the rest of that day setting up the Yisra, they put the fences back up and drove the goats into their pen and led the horses to theirs. When it was all set up, Alqa mounted Nergui and went for a ride around the new area, a little to the west, a small stream flowed south, but mostly it was the same as before, an endless sea of grass. She watched the sunset by the stream with Nergui before riding back, Alqa took Nergui into the pen, took of the bit and bridle and left. She went back to her yurt and Dagan was already asleep. She laid down on her furs and fell asleep.
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Alqa saw a face, black and pointed like the beak of a raven with eyes of glowing red fire. Then the beak opened, within was red fire as well. “Erkhe amudrul amudrul. Erkhe amudrul amudrul. Erkhe amudrul amudrul,” the face hissed in a quiet but loud raspy voice. Then another face appeared next to it. Beautiful and fierce, blonde hair flowing down around it.
“Maintain the balance my child, erkhe amudrul amudrul. This is your task,” the voice whispered to her, so soft and sweet but the voice imparted fear into Alqa. Then Alqa woke up and it was morning, it felt like only a very short time had passed but it was the whole night and Alqa was bleeding.
Alqa stood up, it hurt pretty bad but she needed to talk to Yesui. She quickly put on her boots and belt, taking her cloak as well since it was cold she walked over to Yesui’s yurt. “Yesui! Can I talk to you?” she asked.
“Sure Alqa, come in,” Yesui responded. Alqa lifted the flap and ducked into the yurt, she sat down cross-legged across from Yesui, who was fletching some raven feathers onto an arrow.
“I’m bleeding,” Alqa said.
“Great, definitely bring your sword everywhere you go, and probably a dagger too. Never know when a male will go for the grapple,” Yesui told her.
“How do you deal with it?” Alqa asked.
“It is really uncomfortable, but you’ll get used to it. When you have children you’ll understand why Agaa Iija and Taimgra added the pain, it really helps,” Yesui told her, this time she actually looked up from the arrow.
“What do you mean?” Alqa asked.
“You will understand when you give birth, it hurts,” Yesui explained, but not really explained.
“You are not filling me with hope,” Alqa told Yesui.
“My goal isn’t to fill you with hope Alqa, my goal is to help you understand pain. You are a woman of the Qutuq, you will fight in our armies and those will gather soon,” Yesui responded, looking back at the arrow. Alqa left Yesui’s tent, it was all very confusing and uncomfortable. So Alqa decided to go talk to Nergui.
She went to Nergui and Nergui sputtered when she approached, excitedly prancing about. Alqa grabbed a bit and bridle and slipped it onto Nergui. Alqa pulled herself up onto Nergui and quickly realized that this wasn’t all that comfortable but as Yesui said she would have to get used to the discomfort. She kicked Nergui once and Nergui walked out of the pen and Alqa dismounted and closed it behind her before remounting Nergui. She first took Nergui to drink at the stream, all the while talking to Nergui. “Why can’t I just move on, I want rest, I don’t want these dreams. I mean, I know that the Baltui killed my family but, I got a new family here. Maybe I should go fight the Baltui, I don’t think I have much of a choice anyway, the Yisra will be called to war with the Baltui any day now Nergui. Thanks for listening by the way,” Alqa spouted off to Nergui, who just kept walking where she was directed.
They walked around a bit more and Alqa kept spouting off to Nergui, “I guess I should probably tell more people than just Yesui, but how do I even like, do that? It’s just not something I’ve ever seen before, have you ever seen some young woman just walking through a Yisra telling people they’re bleeding? No, you haven't. Anyway, another thing that is completely unrelated, why am I still thinking about Qotoiyan? Hmm? Why? I really want to talk to him again, but why would I do that? I’m actually kind of excited to go to war because he’s an adult now too! I will actually be able to see him if I go to war, theoretically at least. I know none of this matters to you Nergui. Maybe you should get yourself a mate! Wouldn’t that be fun Nergui, you deserve some reward,” Alqa continued spouting off the Nergui until they got back to the Yisra. She dismounted Nergui, took the bit and bridle and left Nergui alone. Alqa went back to her yurt and started packing a small sack of food. Once she had done that, Alqa went to find Sugekui. She found him cleaning the excrement out of the goat pen, “Hey Sugekui! I’m going out for a few days! Watch over Dagan for me?” Alqa called to him.
“Of course!” Sugekui responded. Alqa went to Nergui, put the bit and bridle back on and led her out of the pen.
Alqa closed the pen and mounted Nergui. She kicked Nergui two times and trotted off. Trotting was even more uncomfortable, she quickly realized. She traveled south for three days before she came to the Baal Tusgra. She dismounted Nergui and a Tusgra Gaalaak approached her, this Tusgra Gaalaak wore no armor than a tall helmet with a white plume of horsehair on top and her tunic was off-white. On her left hip, she wore a curved sword much like Alqa’s. “Halt, state your name and business,” the Tusgra Gaalaak told her in an extremely bored sounding voice, and that was when Alqa saw the splatter of blood around her right waist and the small knife held there.
“Alqaiia Qutuqäsa, I am here to get a dagger,” Alqa told her. The Tusgra Gaalak just turned and walked away.
Alqa went to the smith and entered, she smiled as she saw the smith, hard at work. She cleared her throat to get his attention, he stopped what he was doing and fell on the floor, groveling.
“Please! No again! No again! Done nothing! Nothing! Please!” he cried. Alqa could see he was bleeding.
“I just want a small dagger for self defense,” Alqa told him.
“I make. I know how,” The slave responded. “Will be three days. Yes, me thinks three.” Alqa nodded and left, and hung around the Baal Tusgra for the next three days. When the three days had passed, she went to the smithy again. “Dagger! Dagger, here!” the slave exclaimed, seeing her walk in and pointing to a small wooden bench in the corner. He quickly limped over and picked up the dagger. He limped over to Alqa and placed the dagger in her outstretched hand. It was a short straight iron blade with a horn handle. The handle had carved ridges for gripping and a small flat disk of iron on the bottom of the handle, but it had no quillons of any consequence. The dagger came in a small leather sheath which was able to be hooked anywhere on Alqa’s belt. Alqa chose to hook it on the front of her right thigh.