Chapter 36 - Atomic Fart

It was another day for our practical tests, and once again, Professor Bao had gathered us in the simulation room. The sterile, metallic walls loomed around us, and a faint hum from hidden machinery buzzed in the background, adding to the tension that clung to the air.

For our batch, stepping into this room was a reminder of past disasters—disasters that had names: Cindy and Remuel. Each of us instinctively kept our distance, casting wary glances at the notorious duo. Even Professor Bao, normally poised and unflappable, had subtly retreated to the corner, her eyes fixed on the floor as if avoiding eye contact might lessen the impending chaos.

“W-why are you looking at us like we’re contagious or something?” Cindy's voice cracked the uneasy silence. She crossed her arms defensively, a nervous edge in her tone.

“Y-you know... we just don’t want anything exploding and messing up our hair,” Myrrh said, forcing a tense smile that did little to hide her apprehension. She tugged a strand of her green-blonde hair, as if remembering the last time it had been singed.

“Hey, it’s not my fault that my Ultimate is a self-destruct button!” Cindy snapped, her face flushing. “Blame Remuel for hitting the button in the first place!”

“I-I was only following the Professor’s orders!” Remuel’s face turned ashen, his voice a high-pitched whine. He shot an accusatory glance at Professor Bao, who remained silent, hugging the wall as if it offered some sort of sanctuary.

“Now, now, settle down, students,” Professor Bao’s voice cut in, barely hiding a tremor of unease. “This is no time for arguments. My lesson is about to begin.” Yet she remained at a safe distance, her body angled slightly away, as if expecting a sudden blast.

“Seriously, it’s all your fault, Professor,” Remuel muttered under his breath, but his words fell unheard, swept away by the buzzing sounds of the simulation equipment.

Professor Bao, oblivious to the remark, cleared her throat and straightened. “Listen up, WAIFUs and WEEBs. Midterm Exams are fast approaching, and this Clearance Level will be your second-to-last weapon unlock before you reshuffle to your next partners.” Her words echoed off the cold metal walls. “This time, we’ll be focusing on a heavy-type weapon, usually wielded with both hands of the Frame Unit.”

With a few quick taps on her tablet, a soft chime sounded, and our WEEB Systems buzzed to life. A new set of data filled our displays, the words bright and crisp:

[Weaponry Enhancement Engineering Bios]

[Clearance – Level 6]

[Level 1 - Laser Sword]

[Level 2 - Beam Rifle]

[Level 3 - Light Shield]

[Level 4 - Jetpack]

[Level 5 - Ultimate]

[Level 6 - Buster Sword]

“Buster Sword?” I muttered, my eyes narrowing as the name flashed on my screen. The letters hovered in mid-air, surrounded by a faint, digital glow. Myrrh leaned closer, the faint hum of her hologram interface thrumming between us. Her gaze flicked up to the shimmering 3D model of the weapon, its angular form rotating slowly.

“This feels kind of redundant with your Blade Wings, doesn’t it?” I asked, glancing at her. The hologram’s light cast a faint, bluish tint on Myrrh’s face, making her green-blonde hair look like a cascade of luminescent ivy.

She gave a thoughtful nod, her lips pressing into a line. “The shape and size is different,” she murmured, studying the thick, menacing blade.

"That's what she said." I scoffed.

Myrrh rolled her eyes and brushed my jokes off.

“WAIFUs, to the red line!” Professor Bao’s voice rang out, slicing through the low murmur of conversation. “Transform into your Frame Unit mode.”

With a single, synchronized motion, the WAIFUs stepped to the glowing red line that bisected the room. They raised their morphers high, their faces set with determination, and as one, they shouted, “Frame Unit, Awaken!” A flash of light burst forth, and in an instant, their human forms vanished, replaced by towering, gleaming robots. The metallic armor reflected the room’s bright overhead lights, casting long, distorted shadows on the floor.

“Support units,” Professor Bao’s voice had a steely edge, “activate the Level 6 Weapon.”

Heart pounding, I tapped the [Buster Sword] option on my interface, feeling a slight vibration in my fingertips as the system engaged. All around me, the other support units did the same, their eyes locked on the imposing figures of their partner WAIFUs. With a deep breath, I extended my hand, glowing circuits tracing up my wrist and across my palm. A soft, electric hum filled the air as energy crackled from our outstretched hands toward the waiting giants.

“Buster Sword, Equip!” we called out in unison.

A swirling, cybernetic circle materialized beside each WAIFU, casting a neon-blue glow that flickered against their armor. Their hands shot forward, fingers outstretched, gripping the edge of the light as if pulling something from another dimension. With a synchronized motion, they drew out oversized Buster Swords—blades as tall as the WAIFUs themselves. The swords gleamed with a cold, metallic luster, their razor-sharp edges outlined by a crackling line of blue laser light. At the tip of each blade, a sharpened steel point jutted out, gleaming dangerously in the dim simulation room.

The sheer weight and bulk of the Buster Swords were apparent. The Frame Units, struggling to adjust to the weapon’s heft, had to grasp the hilts with both hands. Steel fiber muscles tensed beneath their armor, servos whirring to maintain balance as the oversized blades settled into a battle-ready stance.

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“Buster Swords are designed to tear through heavily armored opponents,” Professor Bao’s voice echoed through the room, sharp and authoritative. “These weapons pack immense power, but you’ll have to sacrifice speed for strength. The steel tip is engineered to rip apart armor that deflects laser strikes, while the laser edge can cut through almost anything else.” She tapped a command on her tablet, and the sterile metal walls of the simulation room vanished, replaced by a sprawling holographic landscape—a grassy plain that seemed to stretch endlessly beneath a digital sky.

Suddenly, a massive hologram materialized—a gigantic rhinoceros, eighteen meters tall, its body encased in thick, reinforced armor that shimmered like polished metal. It resembled a mechanized beast straight out of a nightmare, steam hissing from its nostrils as it pawed the ground, preparing to charge.

“For this drill, the dummy rhinos will rush your position,” Professor Bao instructed, her gaze fixed on the WAIFUs. “Your task is to strike as many as possible using your Buster Swords. Support units, guide your partners using the minimaps. Now—get ready!” She adjusted her glasses with a swift motion, her eyes gleaming with anticipation.

The WAIFUs tightened their grips, shifting into a low stance, their swords angled toward the horizon like ancient samurai preparing for a deadly duel. Each blade pulsed with energy, casting long shadows across the virtual grass.

“Go!” Professor Bao blew her whistle, a sharp note that split the tension like a blade.

The simulation roared to life. Hordes of holographic rhinoceros dummies barreled toward the WAIFUs, each moving at breakneck speeds—at least one hundred kilometers per hour. Their immense, armored forms thundered across the plains, a stampede of steel and fury.

“Raaah! Gaaaah!” One of the Frame Units staggered under the weapon’s weight, struggling to find the perfect swing.

“Owie!” Fei Xian, caught off balance by the force of her own swing, stumbled and crashed to the ground, the weight of the Buster Sword pulling her down. A cloud of holographic dust billowed up around her as she hit the grassy terrain, her sword digging into the earth with a heavy thud. She grunted, quickly scrambling to her feet, the holographic rhinos closing in fast.

Meanwhile, Myrrh struggled to keep her balance, using the weight of her mechanical left foot to counterbalance the enormous Buster Sword held steady in her right. Her movements were calculated, the whir of servos and the hiss of hydraulics audible as she adjusted her stance.

“Yaaah! Horeyaaaah!” she cried, her voice strained with effort as she swung the massive blade. The edge of the sword crackled with energy, cutting cleanly through the carapace of the charging rhinoceros dummies. One, two, three—each blow split the armored hides with surgical precision. The thick steel tip cleaved effortlessly through the layers of reinforced metal plating, but the heaviness of the sword was clear in each slow, deliberate arc.

“Left! Right! Left! Left! Right! Center! Right!” I shouted, my eyes glued to the minimap as the next wave of dummies surged forward like a mechanical tide.

Myrrh responded to each command instantly, pivoting and adjusting her weight with every strike, the powerful swings leaving a trail of blue afterglow in the air. Each rhinoceros crumbled under her blows, their armor tearing like pork chashu beneath the relentless force of the Buster Sword.

Her balance was remarkable, a testament to her precise control over the bulky weapon. Maybe all that practice with her exaggerated assets—those ludicrously large boobs and round buttocks in her human form—had trained her sense of equilibrium better than anyone suspected.

The sharp blast of a whistle cut through the chaos, signaling the end of the drill.

“The test is over!” Professor Bao’s authoritative voice rang out. “We have two top performers in this session! Myrrh Alicent and Cindy Florence, both scoring a perfect fifty points!”

There was a shimmering flash of light as the Frame Units disengaged, and the WAIFUs returned to their human forms, shrinking back down to their familiar selves. Myrrh tossed her long, lime-green hair with a dramatic flick, a smug smile spreading across her face as our classmates crowded around her, showering her with praise. “It's just a basic skill,” she said airily, her tone oozing arrogance.

By now, most of us had grown accustomed to Myrrh's brazen self-confidence. It was hard to deny she had the skills to back it up, and despite her vanity, she was always approachable. Even I had developed a kind of immunity to her cockiness. As she walked over, I grinned and we slapped a quick high-five, her eyes glinting with satisfaction.

But the real surprise of the test was Cindy. No one expected her to score a perfect fifty—she was usually average at best, often struggling with other challenges like the jetpack obstacle courses and the beam rifle target drills. There she stood, a bit awkward amidst the applause, her face flushed with a mix of pride and disbelief.

For once, Myrrh wasn’t the only star of the show. A new kind of respect hung in the air, and even Myrrh seemed to sense it, shooting Cindy a quick, appraising glance before her signature smirk returned.

Cindy flicked her wavy crimson hair over her shoulder with a triumphant laugh. “Hahaha! Praise me too!” she declared, her voice echoing with exaggerated pride. “Wait—why are you all still standing so far away from me?”

“Um, well…” Fei Xian’s voice was barely more than a whisper, her cheeks flushing as she stepped forward. “We might actually be scared that you’ll... you know... explode again out of happiness.” She shuffled her feet nervously, glancing away.

“Yeah, exactly,” chimed in another WAIFU, eyeing Cindy with mock caution. “I’d rather not get blasted with smoke just because you passed this time.”

“Seriously, Cindy, cut it out. Your head’s getting so big it might explode,” teased another student, trying—and failing—to suppress a grin.

I couldn’t help but notice how stale my classmates' comments were, so I decided to step in, my own smile widening. If there was ever a moment to lighten the mood, this was it.

“Great job on acing the test, Atomic Fart!” I shouted, raising my voice so everyone could hear. “We were completely blown away!”

The room erupted in laughter. Even Professor Bao, usually composed and stern, let out a soft, disbelieving scoff.

“Hey! Who said that?” Cindy’s eyes flared, her cheeks turning crimson to match her hair. She rolled up her sleeves with a determined look, all traces of her earlier laughter vanishing. “I’m gonna kill whoever said that!” She marched straight to Neil, her movements full of tomboyish bravado, and grabbed him by the collar. “Was it you, you stupid prick?”

“I-It’s not me!” Neil stammered, his voice quivering with panic as he tried to shake his head.

Cindy’s eyes narrowed as she released him, her hands dropping to her sides with a huff. She spun around, voice rising in a loud, indignant shout. “Who the hell said that? Give me that bastard’s name!”

“It rhymes with ‘daft!’” Myrrh’s voice rang out above the laughter, a mischievous glint in her eyes. She shot me a cheeky grin, sticking out her tongue with that smug, teasing expression I knew too well.

I shot her a murderous look, but it was too late. Cindy’s gaze snapped to me, and I could see the fire burning in her eyes as she stormed toward me. I turned to flee, panic surging through me, but her grip was faster than my feet. She caught me by the nape of my neck with a firm, unrelenting hand, halting my escape in an instant.

“Where do you think you’re going, you goon?” Cindy whispered, her breath hot against my ear, her voice low and dangerous, but a hint of playful menace lurked beneath the threat.