My head feels like I fell off Kilimanjaro. Again. Everything is fuzzy at first, like my eyes are playing catch-up with my surroundings, but after a few blinks it all clears up, although I'm not sure that helps me much: All I see is stark grey sand and a few rolling hills. Some laughs ring out a few miles away, but I've seen enough horror movies to doubt that's a good thing.

I start walking in the opposite direction, trying to piece together as much as I can remember. My name: Stan... no, it's Stefan. Stefan Fink. I'm a biogeochemical engineer, the kind of job that does not get you many dates because, well, it's difficult as hell to explain. I do remember a few of my accolades, however: Helped some animal sanctuaries, started a charity campaign for ecological development, real 'Hero of the Earth' type stuff. Anything more recent gets a bit hazy, though; All I remember is that I signed on to survey a plot of land in Venezuela and make sure that building on it wouldn't damage the local ecosystem. I remembered I usually didn't take gigs from private companies, but I agreed because the guy was funny. And hot... oh, that's right! I don't have to worry about dates; I'm already married. Liam Fink, the real estate magnate who made his empire into an environmental powerhouse all because his husband pestered him to death. I guess he must've pestered me over surveilling the land, too.

Things finally start falling into place, but the laughing starts again, closer this time. I figure that running will only make whatever this is worse, so I walk over to check out the source. I nearly pass out again when I find it: A large table made of coral stretching far beyond my vision, with the end closest to me sitting in the middle of some kind of pond filled with fish and invertebrates. I recognize a few species: Placodermi, Osteostraci, and early eurypterids flitting among reeds and kelp. It's beautiful to see, but there's one problem: They've all been extinct for millions of years. One of the fish spots me and waves their fin, almost like they want me to come over. My intrigue outweighed my shock, so I oblige them and walk to the pond's edge. They move like they want me to lean over, so I touch my face to the water and almost fall in when their mouths open.

"Hey, you're a human right? We've heard a lot about you from further down the table! I'm Evan, what's your name?"

It-it talked? The extinct animal asked me my name?!

"I-I'm Stefan. How... how is this possible? I don't mean to be rude, but aren't you all-"

"Dead, yeah. We died a while ago and given your confused stare, you probably just got here, if you catch my drift."

"W-What?! I can't be dead! Last thing I remember, I was going to Venezuela... or did I already land? What the hell was I doing?"

"Don't push it, buddy, it'll come back to you. Just keep heading down the table and find a place to sit. Something big is going down."

I'm a bit disconcerted at what this 'something' might be, but I push up from the pond and start walking. I turn back to Evan, however and ask him a question.

"Why are you so happy? I mean, this place seems pretty calm, but you guys are dead. Aren't you bored, or at least a bit sad you aren't on Earth anymore?"

"Eh, we stopped sweating it a while back. Besides, it was natural, right?"

I mutter an agreeable response and start following the table. It takes a few twists and turns through some trees, but I keep the trail. I dismiss Evan, thinking it's all a fever dream, perhaps a side-effect of a bug bite, then I get hit by a flying chunk of meat and realize this is very much real. I get lifted to my feet by what feel likes thick claws, then wiped off by a scaly tail. I keep my eyes closed, not wanting to know what might be facing me. I get dragged a bit further before getting planted in some sand and my eyes forced open to see a velociraptor, followed by dinosaurs from every time period. I start to realize this 'afterlife' is a bit more crowded than what I would have expected, even though there are miles and miles of empty sands. The velociraptor taps my forehead and smiles.

"Are you okay? Sorry about that; the guys get a bit rowdy when the food comes out. I'm Mike, how are you doing?"

"Well, apparently, I died and don't know how, so not great! What about my family and friends and-"

"Easy, take a breath. You'll probably see them soon. People don't join the table unless it's over."

"O-over?! The fuck do you mean over? And why are you so calm about this? I hate to bear bad news, but my kind dig you guys up, make figurines of you to play with, and make cheesy videos with wildly inaccurate recreations. Doesn't that make you mad?"

"Eh, we've had a while to destress. It doesn't really bother us anymore. As for the 'over' thing, I should probably let someone further down the table explain. Don't worry; I'm sure it was quick and natural, like the rest of us I hope."

Mike pats me on the back and pushes me on my way. My heartrate (Is it even still considered a heartrate now?) starts to quicken, and my mind drifts to images of my loved ones. What about my mom, my sister, my little cousins who always wreck my house when they visit? Oh god, what about my house and pets?! I barely notice my teeth start to chitter as the table turns to ice and I start walking through a massive, arctic cavern filled with mammoths, smilodons, and whatever other animals you can remember from Continental Drift. Ironically, that's one of my cousins' favorite movies. A giant sloth tries to wave me over, but I keep walking. While most people in my business would be thrilled to meet these creatures, I'm not in the mood for any more cryptic chats unless it's the usual trope of a guy with a long beard and longer robe. I pass through the cave, then some Neanderthals, then finally spot a few humans. Sure, they're from timeframes we refer to as 'B.C.', but it's nice to see something without fur or gills. I walk by, trying to strike up a conversation, but these sections of the table are much less jolly. Everyone from the pharaohs to the roman emperors are arguing. Arguing about liquor, women, even land that no longer exists. One man even tries to stab the person next to him, but they just pop back to 'life' like it was nothing. I decide to keep walking, and I realize that there's a stark difference between these guys and the earlier patrons: Nothing about their deaths was natural.

I pass through centuries in a few steps. I see Leonardo Da Vinci guzzling wine, followed by British soldiers polishing their muskets and singing sea shanties. I see a large, golden tower in the distance, and I think I'm finally close to the end. Once I pass the last of the bickering nations, though, I see a much different scene than what I expect. The sand below my feet turns to lush jungle, and I spot animals digging below my feet and hanging in the trees above, eyeing me with vicious intent. A Tasmanian Tiger flips me off, but I have little time to respond as I dodge a piece of flung dung. I turn to see the culprit, but my confusion increases as I see a rhesus monkey running away. Why would he be here? They're still alive all over Asia, and most species are far from endangered. Mike said creatures come here when it's 'over', but they shouldn't be over yet. I decide to voice my concern over the sudden assault, hoping to get a reasonable answer.

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"Why are you guys so pissed? The guys from earlier periods seemed pretty cheery but the table has gotten angrier with every step."

"Gee, I wonder why?"

I hear a low growl from behind and turn to see a stunning panther. I've seen dozens of them in conservation centers and parks, but the way his fangs are gleaming strikes a bit more fear than usual. Then, it hits me: I'm dead. There's nothing more he can do to me, so I stand tall and stare him straight in the eye.

"What do I have to do with you being here? Matter of fact, half of the stuff in this forest shouldn't be here! You're not... 'over'."

"You're right! We shouldn't be here. If you hadn't gotten on that damned plane and maybe paid more attention to your surroundings, this wouldn't be happening! You were supposed to be one of the good ones, to make sure things stayed on the natural course!"

"What does Venezuela have to do with this? It was just a plot of land in the middle of nowhere. I remember now: I took some soil samples and tested them. I decided it was stable enough, nothing more than a few precious minerals to watch out for, so I called in Liam's workers to section off the unstable areas."

The panther looks at me like I answered my own question. The animals retreat further into the forest and the panther leaves with them, however he gives me a final message:

"Why don't you ask him about this place, then, hmm?"

"Fine! Fine! I'm almost to the tower anyway. Have a nice eternity, you creeps!"

I realize I'm only yelling at myself. The jungle's denizens are far from earshot, and I'm left with a chilling question: What was in Venezuela?

I start running now. The tower gets brighter the closer I get, and it's like a thousand suns when I finally reach the doors. Two guards stand outside, ready to turn me away with their fiery blades, but when they see my face, they stop.

"Mr. Fink! So glad you've made it; you're just in time."

Before I can respond, they grab me by the arms and pull me into the tower. I curse under my breath when I realize the place has no elevator, so it's more walking... up what seems like 500 fucking flights. The first few dozen floors are filled with a thick stench, and people in tattered clothes cover the floor. The tower is much larger inside than how it appears outside, but somehow the rooms are still overflowing with sick and battered.

"What happened to them? If this is death, why are they still injured?"

"They're not completely through yet. Give them some time, and they'll be like the rest of us."

"Wait, so you know what's happening? Tell me! What does Venezuela have to do with this? Where's Liam?"

"He wants to tell you himself. Don't worry; we're almost there."

I try to wrestle free from their grasp, but when my hand grazes one of their blades, it's left with a deep gash. Somehow, their weapons can still harm me. We reach the top floor, and sitting at the end of the table flanked by four more guards is Liam. He seems different, though; he's smug, and he's drinking some foul scotch while looking at some crystal ball. He always hated dark liquor.

"Liam, what is going on?! Why are we here?"

I expect him to scream, cry, shake me awake, even say nothing and sit with a blank stare, but he just stands up and kisses me like we're at home.

"Darling, sit. I thought we'd come through together, but we got separated before I could show you."

He pushes me down in the chair next to him, and I realize I don't have a choice in the matter. I look through the crystal ball, and all I see is fire. I turn to see Liam's reaction to the blaze, and he's grinning ear to ear.

"I won't ask again: What the fuck was in Venezuela?"

"I wasn't sure until you showed me the soil samples, but Venezuela held the solution, Stefan. You see, the world has been suffering for decades, and we had surely passed the point of no return. Getting to the age of science fiction and finding a new planet was taking too long, so we decided to simply save a few billion people years of suffering. Turns out, igniting just the right mineral deposits in just the right place can cause quite the chain reaction; explosions lead to earthquakes lead to tsunamis and well, you can piece it together from there. It was messy, and it's not complete just yet, but it's much quicker this way. I just wanted you to confirm; knowing you were by my side made it much easier."

"You... you used me? To find you some sort of doomsday switch?! We had the resources to help, to change! We still had time to protect something. That was my entire career! It's what we worked to build!"

"And it wasn't working anymore! I couldn't bear to show you the reports... it was getting worse every day and we could never find enough people to help. I spared you the agony of failure by doing this; taking a chance on something better laying beyond the hellscape we had created. I sped up what nature already had planned."

"THIS IS NOT NATURAL, LIAM! You just gave up, and now you're watching your handiwork like you're a hero who saved the city. The people down there... there's no words to describe what I just walked through."

"Much better than what would've been. Now, the slate is clean. Take comfort in our newfound freedom, and maybe we can finally find some peace."

I couldn't believe it. I wasn't sure what hurt worse: Being used as a pawn in this twisted, ridiculous scheme, or the fact the man I loved had hidden this lunacy from me this whole time. I was too angry to tell him that there were people here for thousands of years still arguing over the same goddamn issues. I'll let him find that little tidbit out himself.

"Are those little blades to make sure people get along?"

I lift my gashed hand hoping to get a reaction out of him, but he just touches my hand and heals the wound like nothing.

"Blessed Steel. A bit more vicious than expected, honestly don't know how they work, but let's hope we won't have to use them much."

He turns back to the crystal ball and shakes his head. The ball starts to vibrate, and small cracks form on its surface.

"The crystal ball has been used for every era for beings to see what comes next, but no more. Do you see? It's almost over, my love. Do you want to say anything to the final moments of the world?"

'My love'... it stings like acid, but I no longer have a choice. No matter how far I run, I'm stuck here. The beings I dedicated my life to loathe me, and my husband has turned into a monster. All I can do is fall to me knees and hold the ball close as tears stream down my face.

"I'm sorry we hurt you. I'm sorry to all the souls that will never come. I'm sorry it ended this way."

And then it shattered. I was stuck here, condemned with the rest of the planet to this sandy Tartarus, and it was all my fault. All because I couldn't see that my closest confidant had lost hope. All because our will to fight had been warped into something unspeakable. All because generation after generation went against nature, and we never stopped to ask... was change possible?