My husband to-be is so nervous, you’d think we hadn’t been friends since forever. He stutters and stammers, blushing every time he sees me. But, behind the flustered exterior is a smile that I will cherish forever. He saw me in my wedding clothes yesterday. It is a moment I will cherish until my last breath. – the diary of Zhao Hanako on the day before her wedding.

* * *

The eighth time I Flashed Back, we tried moving faster through the garden. The enemy on patrol hadn’t quite left, yet. He spotted us, called his friends, and we lost them all.

The ninth time I Flashed Back, we waited for the enemy to leave, broke down the back door, and rushed up the stairs to rescue those upstairs. We managed to get Tenri’s parents out of the building, only to find they were already dead by the time we reached the outside. Xinya was alive, but unconscious and possibly in danger of permanent damage to her lungs.

The tenth, eleventh, twelfth, and thirteenth times I Flashed Back, I was able to save Xinya, only to be stopped by random chance. Beams fell, paths were blocked, flames spread to strange parts of the building, consuming the bedroom before we ever even reached Hanako.

The fourteenth time I Flashed Back, Tenri and I rescued Xinya together. After that, we returned to find Hanako, skipping straight past his parents, who were beyond saving. Hanako was already dead, and Tenri was inconsolable. He stayed by her side until the roof began to cave in. I…I don’t know if he made it out…my vision was blurred with tears of frustration and my focus was already on Flashing Back again.

The fifteenth time…I sat down and rested my head in my arms. My body ached. Blood was flowing freely from the tally-marks, and the voices of despair crawled deep from the dark recesses of my mind. I wasn’t sure if it was even possible to save them. Tenri’s parents were beyond saving, already dead by the time we arrived. Xinya was in critical condition, and I’d never gotten to Hanako fast enough to know if there was a chance. Frustration and sorrow reigned in my heart as the physical toll of Flash Back began to manifest. As tears began to well in my eyes, Tenri didn’t know what to do, and I didn’t bother explaining. Once thirty-nine minutes passed, and I was through tormenting myself with visions of Xinya’s still body and Hanako’s blood, I Flashed Back again.

In the sixteenth time, weariness held sway over my body, but I couldn’t stop. I picked up the pace, running as fast as I could. All my energy went to my feet and legs. I didn’t even spare any for Tenri as I sprinted towards town without a word.

I had to know. I had to see if it was even possible.

Hanako might not have been my wife, but she was one of the only friends I had left. If there was even a shred of a chance that I could save her…that if I just found the right combination of actions to get the perfect outcome…to save her…if it was even remotely possible, then I was prepared to Flash Back a hundred times more. I would exhaust every avenue, try every solution, and pay any blood price to see her safe from harm.

Smoke only barely curled out the windows by the time I reached the building. Tenri was so far behind that I didn’t see him. He was calling my name somewhere behind me, but I paid him no mind. I’d have to Flash Back and undo this reality. I just needed to know…

I vaulted over the wall before leaping straight to the upper balcony. A shout from the patrolling cultivator warned his friends of my arrival, but I was through the window before he could stop me.

The window was already broken? I noted silently. It had been broken from the outside, as shown by the glass on the floor. In previous iterations, I hadn’t noticed. Perhaps there was a chance after all.

I rushed to Hanako’s side. She lay on the floor, exactly where she always was. Her wrists were slashed by her attackers, but this time the blood was still flowing, albeit slowly. Hope surged inside me, and I ripped the bottom of my robes, frantically wrapping the injuries in the hope of saving her.

“Ru…ru?” Hanako murmured. “You...you’re here…”

“I am. You’re going to be okay. Save your strength,” I ordered her, but she shook her head.

“You can’t save me,” she said.

“I will.”

“I…saw it…Ruru. It’s fate.” Her voice was soft, and I could barely hear it over the growing din of the flames. However, at the word “fate,” a sickening darkness settled into my stomach.

“Fate and I don’t get along,” I growled. “I will save you, Hanako! Tenri needs you. Xinya needs you.”

Her eyes turned upward in amusement, and she chuckled. Even as I held her in my arms, I couldn’t feel her shoulders shake, she was so weak.

“I saw fate, Ruru,” she insisted. “The flames are my defiance...that you…and Lin…would see in time…”

“We did. It worked. Your plan worked, Hanako. Just let me save you.” I pressed harder on the cloth at her wrists, but she pulled away.

“I am…beyond…help…please don’t waste your time…on me.”

“It’s my time to waste!”

She shook her head. “No, Ruru…Xinya and Lin…need you more than…me.” Her words were coming more quietly now. Her breaths were shallower, and I could barely feel any qi in her at all. With the last of her strength, she reached up, stroked my cheek. “You are more…than your titles, Ruru. Please, take care of them both…for me…”

Hanako’s hand fell into her lap. Her eyes unfocused, and she was gone.

This story has been stolen from Royal Road. If you read it on Amazon, please report it

This time, it was my turn to scream my rage over her corpse. No one in Saikan was sweeter than Hanako. She’d done nothing wrong. It wasn’t fair…

Just like Chouko… The voice of the Hated One…that wicked version of Reili that said such hateful things…whispered in the back of my thoughts, and she was right. I wept over Hanako’s body the same way I wept over Chouko’s…helpless to change anything.

I could end it all, I thought. The cultivators are still here. A big enough blast would catch them, too… It was so tempting. With the Hated One’s help…enough void qi could decimate everything, catching them in the process. Was I strong enough for that? To destroy everything without any restraint? It wouldn’t be the first time…

But…what of Xinya? What of Tenri?

The splitting of a beam above snapped my attention back to the burning room, away from the thoughts and the grief that threatened to overwhelm me. If I didn’t Flash Back and deny this reality any hold over the world, then it would become fixed. Xinya still needed to be saved…

Wearily I set Hanako’s body to the side and stood. Both my blood and hers dripped from my hands as I drew out my qi to form the lunar sigils before me. With one last look at her glassy eyes, reality shattered again.

* * *

I stumbled and collapsed on the forest road, blood leaking from sixteen tallies on my right arm. A ragged cough wracked my body, but as I tried to push myself to my feet, my gaze drifted to my hand. It flickered, at times revealing the hard earth beyond it.

“Tsuyuki? Are you okay?” Tenri asked. He reached out a hand to help, but I shied away.

“Don’t touch,” I insisted. “Just run. Your house is burning. Xinya is trapped inside. She’s in her bedroom, but you have to go in through the back courtyard. Mind the exploding door and the enemy on patrol.”

“The…enemy?”

“Just go! I’m right behind you!”

For a blessing, Tenri recognized the desperation that cracked in my voice. The heat of the last fire was still in my lungs, and Hanako’s words still rang in my ears. I had to get there…she said to take care of them.

I forced myself to stand, taking a deep breath to steady my body. This was the last time. Even at Iron, my body wouldn’t be able to withstand another Flash Back, the rebound would be too great. Whatever happened this time would be how it would be…and there was still much to do. Xinya needed rescuing, and Tenri needed to be removed from the building before it collapsed on him.

If the timing was right, then Tenri would make it inside just as the villains were leaving, thus avoiding them altogether. Then, if he followed my instructions, he’d save Xinya first, as she was the closest to the exit and the one whose location he knew. If I hurried, I could arrive to the front door just as he brought her out, and I’d be able to prevent him from returning.

So, I ran. Qi and desperation pumped through my body like blood, fueling my muscles with the energy to keep going, even as my own abilities were busy ripping them apart.

The smoke hadn’t yet thickened by the time I rounded the corner. From there, I spied the enemy cultivators just as they rounded the corner, moving away from the scene of their crimes. Part of me wanted to strike at them while their backs were turned, but to do so would only jeopardize the careful timing I’d planned for.

A moment later, Tenri burst out the front door, carrying a little bundle in his arms. Xinya looked around with wide eyes, before setting her on the ground.

“Are you alright?” Tenri asked as I knelt next to them. Xinya nodded.

“But Hanako! She’s in the bedroom! Those men…they tried to kill her!”

Tenri paled. Without a word, he spun around and raced back towards the house. I lunged, trying to grab his robes, but my hand passed right through them as if I were nothing more than a ghost.

“Tenri! Don’t!” I shouted, but he wasn’t listening. I pushed myself painfully to my feet, only for Xinya to try repeating my gesture. Like mine, her hand clasped around only air instead of the fabric of my clothes. She looked confused.

“Uncle? What…why are you…?” As in previous iterations, I flagged down a passing neighbor to take care of Xinya before running back into the blaze, myself. The little girl wailed. “No! Uncle Yoru! You can’t be dead! Don’t leave me!”

I’ll explain later, Meimei, I mentally promised.

Over the blaze, I heard Tenri’s grief. I rushed up the stairs. As expected, he cradled Hanako’s still form in his arms as the flames raged around them.

“Lin…I’m so sorry,” I said, collapsing to my knees next to him.

“Who…who did this?” Tenri said through heaving sobs. I wished nothing more than to be able to touch his shoulder, to lay a hand on him and provide him some small comfort.

“I don’t know who they are, but they wear Lunar Hunt insignia,” I explained.

“Shen Tori? Why would he kill Hanako? What has she done to deserve this?”

“I…” my voice failed. Images of every single time we reached this point flashed through my mind. I wished I had the answers, that I could tell him why his beloved was targeted this way. But… “I don’t know,” was all the answer I had.

“Can you fix it? Go back, rewrite reality or whatever it is your bloodline does?” he begged.

“I…I tried.” The admission of failure was more than I could bear. For all my boasting of being the Master of Reality, there were some things even I could not change. All I could do was mourn.

Tenri rocked back and forth, holding Hanako close. I couldn’t bring myself to disturb them, not yet. Only once the beam creaked overhead, heralding the impending collapse did I stand.

“Lin, we need to leave,” I murmured softly. “The building is going to collapse.”

Tenri looked around at the bedroom he once shared with Hanako. Tears carved trails in the soot on his cheeks, as he pressed his forehead to Hanako’s.

“I can’t…” he said. “This was our home…our room. Her spirit is still here, how can I leave her?”

“She wouldn’t want you to die here with her, come on!”

“Leave, Yoru!” he shouted. Qi resonated in his words, and I realized only too late what that meant. The iron band around my core squeezed, urging me to follow his command. Tenri rarely spoke with such force, I’d almost forgotten that the bond we shared gave him that kind of control over me. He wasn’t even aware of it, but any command he gave me, when enforced with qi, I would be compelled to follow.

I choked, collapsing to my knees to resist rather than follow. My body screamed with agony as my physical self began to flicker in and out of reality.

“Tsuyuki?” Tenri asked, seeing my body become even more transparent.

“Please…don’t stay here…” I gasped. Tenri seemed to finally see the flames as they ate at the walls of his bedroom. He laid Hanako’s body to the side, folding her hands neatly over her chest, before turning to me.

He tried to take me by the hand and drag me away, but his fingers passed right through me.

“It’s the rebound…go…” I begged.

“But, you’re in no condition to escape on your own.”

“I’ll be fine,” I lied.

Tenri was smart enough to see through it, though. After a moment of thought, his qi surged inside him, flowing through his body and reinforcing it with the power of adaptation. Then, he seized me and lifted me into his arms before sprinting for the door.

All I remember after was the sound of snapping beams and collapsing wood, then all was silent.