Our world is cruel. With the weights of power we all wield, sooner or later we all fail in one way or another. Those we love are left to suffer. The least I can do is grant those who leave a true peace and separation from their mortal pains. –Wu Siwan, the Ascendant of Death

* * *

There was one matter, however, that was more important than my promise to Pollen. I strode through the covered palace walkways, following a bumbling bee that Pollen had designated as a “Groomer.” Apparently, they were her personal attendants and the keepers of her household. They did all the cleaning, all the cooking, and saw to Pollen’s every need. Beyond the inner palace, the scouts and other workers were in charge, but here, the Groomers were second only to Pollen herself.

The bee clasped its front limbs together and bowed its head, gesturing with its mid-legs to a door carved with weaving vines. I nodded my head respectfully to the bee before opening the door and stepping inside.

Xinya sat on a bed, dressed in a brand new dress with honeycomb patterns decorating the collar and sleeves. Where Pollen got such a fine and detailed outfit on such short notice was beyond me, but it fit Xinya perfectly. Nearby, a Groomer nudged a plate of some kind of honey-colored pudding towards the little girl, but she turned away.

“Hey now,” I scolded gently. “The bees might get offended if you don’t accept their treats.”

When Xinya raised her head, a brief smile crossed her lips, but it was quickly replaced with a dark sorrow that darkened her emerald eyes. I knew that look…I knew that look well. Guilt, loss, regret…they were my constant companions.

I sat down on the bed beside her. What should I say? Was there anything that would lift her spirits? She’d been made into an orphan and ostracized by her own people in one fell swoop. No child should have to deal with the pain swirling in her heart.

What would Aya say at a time like this? What would Chouko say? I thought to myself. My sisters were always so much better at dealing with hard situations like this. I was clever, but, by comparison, they were both stars in the heavens that the likes of me could only dream of reaching. But, for all their compassion, they were both gone. I was the one here to try and heal the spirit next to me.

“Your father was a good man,” I said softly. “It was clear to everyone just how much he loved you.”

Xinya didn’t answer. She stared stubbornly at the floorboards, but no tears welled in her eyes. A rim of red clouded them. She’d been crying already, and had no doubt run out of tears. I took a deep breath, preparing myself to share what I’d only shared with a handful of people before.

“I didn’t have a good father,” I began, apprehension gripping my heart. “My mother was a cultivator, like yours, but she died fighting a rival when I was too young to remember. Our father never recovered from that blow.” I paused, trying to judge if Xinya was even listening, but the girl was unreadable as ever. I pushed onward. “My little sister and I were effectively raised by our older sister, Aya, and we were all that any of us ever needed. It was us against the world.

“I’ll spare you the details of a very, very long history, but the short of it was that Aya was taken from us. It spurred me to become a cultivator, and, even then, she died in my arms. I was helpless to save her. Even with all the tricks I’d learned, all the power I had, I couldn’t…” My voice cracked, and I cleared my throat. “At the time, I vowed I’d never let my other sister suffer that kind of fate, but that, too, was out of my control. I could challenge the very heavens, but my second sister died in my arms, just like the first.” I wrapped an arm around Xinya’s shoulder. “Sometimes, it doesn’t matter how much you try, or what you do to stop it, bad things just happen. They hurt, I won’t try to say they don’t. Heavens know the damage I caused when I was drowning in my grief. I was so hurt that I let myself fall to madness rather than face a world without them…and that cost me everything.”

Xinya’s shoulders began to tremble, and she squeezed her eyes shut. Her fists balled into fists in her lap, but she didn’t speak. It was only after several minutes that she dared to open her mouth.

“But, why?” she rasped through gritted teeth. “Why did he have to die? What had we done wrong?!” Fury drove her words louder and louder until she was shouting. “We were just eating dinner! We hadn’t done anything to offend anyone, and they pulled my hair and broke his arm! HOW IS THAT FAIR?!”

Suddenly, my every hair stood on end. I pulled forward a strand of my ponytail only to find that several strands were rising from the rest. Static made my skin tingle, and I quickly waved the Groomer from the room, lest she get hurt by Xinya’s fury.

If I’d had eyes of Iron, I would bet I’d have seen lightning qi sparking in the room. Xinya was further along with the creation of her core than I’d dared hope if she could summon this kind of strength, even in a fit of unadulterated rage. Or maybe it was exactly because of her rage that it was gathering so densely. After all, Lightning is the aura of heaven’s judgement. Seeking justice and smiting the wicked were exactly what it did best.

I knelt before the little girl. As soon as I took her hands in mine, I felt a jolt of electricity pass through one hand, up my arm, through my body, and back down the other arm into her. It wasn’t painful. She wasn’t even at the highest stages of the Manifestation Realm.

“It’s not fair,” I answered. “Life isn’t fair. It’s cruel and sadistic, and the only light is that which we shine for others.”

“Light won’t bring my father back!” she screamed. “That monster killed him! He ripped his heart right from his chest, all because…” Her voice broke and tears leaked from her eyes.

A sudden CRACK behind me made me jump. I looked back to see a smoking burn on the floor where a tiny bolt of lightning had just struck. I’d have to apologize to Pollen for the damage, but now the goal was to calm Xinya down before she accidentally set fire to the bedsheets or curtains…or worse her lunar aura began to warp the room.

“It…it’s because…” she muttered, wiping her eyes with the backs of her hands.

Reading on Amazon or a pirate site? This novel is from Royal Road. Support the author by reading it there.

I surged upward, wrapping the girl in a tight hug. She buried her face in my chest and wailed. Another stroke of lightning struck the ground, then another. Finally, a third slammed into my arm, forcing my muscles to tense briefly.

“Xinya,” I murmured to her. “It’s not your fault. Shen Yaoxan is a wicked man. Do not accept the weight of his failure.”

“But…but I…I’m the one who provoked him! He died protecting me!” she screamed with everything she had.

Suddenly, the chaos in the room subsided and the little girl slumped into my arms. No doubt that little tantrum had spent all the qi she had, and certainly all her mental energy to control it.

I hooked my arm behind her legs and lifted her into my arms. Sitting cross-legged on the bed, I settled her into my lap and held her around the shoulders. Chiho pulled itself out of my hair and nuzzled against her cheek as she shuddered in my arms.

“It’s going to be okay,” I murmured. What else could I say? What else could I do? Though her loss of control was justifiable, this was exactly why most sects secluded their younger members until they were old enough to control their emotions better.

The unfortunate truth was that Xinya couldn’t return home anymore. Even if the people of Saikan accepted her, only Tenri could raise her safely. Without a master to teach her self-control, she’d end up destroying herself and everyone around her.

Never thought I’d be the one to champion the cause of discipline… I thought. My old Masters must be laughing at me from the afterlife.

Then again, I was 15 when I started cultivating. Xinya was only nine. Six years makes a big difference. Be they cultivator, spirit beast, or yokai; she’d have to be raised by someone with higher cultivation than her until she was old enough to take care of herself.

“Xinya,” I began. “I think it’s time that I started teaching you to control your qi.”

“R-really?” her eyes were as wide as saucers.

I nodded. “Look around you.” She cast one glance around the room before dropping her gaze to her hands in her lap. “To cultivate is to defy the laws of heaven, but that power should never be taken lightly. Cultivators make enemies, and every technique can be used just as much for good as for evil. Even Ascendents can be struck down if they aren’t careful.”

I was suddenly flashing back to my days listening to my old sect leader lecturing me on these same topics. It was the foundation of my path.

“Now, repeat after me: ‘The Light of Heaven is with me.’” Xinya dutifully repeated the start of the precepts. “‘It washes over and around me, soothing my soul and filling my spirit. My anger is wind before the shield of my light. My patience is the sword with which I shall slay it.’”

There was a time when every cultivator in my dominion knew those words, whether they were sect-bound or not. It was one of the founding principles of the Heaven’s Blade Sect.

“If you find yourself with anger beyond words festering in your heart, remember those words. The Light is your shield,” I finished.

“Light is my shield,” she repeated. “Does this mean I need to call you Master, now?”

“Strictly speaking, you should have been calling me that before,” I muttered. “But, no. I’m no stuffy sect elder.”

“Then what should I refer to you as?”

“You could try using my name for once.” She thought long and hard about the idea, then shook her head.

“No thanks, that’s boring.”

I couldn’t stop the laughter from bubbling up from my chest. She sure was a bundle of trouble. I wondered if she got that from her father. After all, he was troublesome enough to let his daughter cook the world’s spiciest meal.

“Are you going to teach me how to make those light blades you use?” Xinya asked.

“Maybe someday, but you need to finish manifesting your core first,” I explained. “Based on your display, you are certainly no Seed stage artist. You may have passed right through Seedling to Sapling, maybe even all the way to Branch. Only when you reach Leaf, the highest stage of Manifestation will you be able to learn full techniques, and most will require you to reach Bronze at a minimum.”

Xinya raised her knuckle and began biting it as she thought. “When do we start?”

“Queen Pollen has asked me to look into something,” I explained. “After I get back, we’ll get started in earnest. In the meantime, if you start to feel the urge to throw lightning bolts, remember your shield of light and blade of patience. Anger is not your friend, trust me.” Memories of my sins manifested as flashes of devastating light and silver stone. I forced them aside, shoving back the guilt before it could reach my face. Xinya nodded her agreement and rested her head against my chest.

The trembling Groomer poked her fuzzy head back through the door now that the chaos had died down. Her head turned to see the scorched marks where lightning had struck, but she dutifully approached with her pudding bowl once more. I took it in hand and offered the spoon to Xinya.

“If you don’t want it, I’d be happy to eat it for you,” I teased. She glared at me and dug her spoon into the gelatinous sweet. It smelled like honey and fruit, and I was genuinely jealous.

I was even more so after a look of delight sprang onto Xinya’s face. “It’s really sweet!”

“Can I have a bite?”

“No, it’s mine.” She glared at me, and I pouted. A few minutes later, the Groomer returned with another pudding, compliments of Queen Pollen.

Xinya was right. It was the sweetest thing I’d ever tasted.

Xinya would be in excellent hands with Pollen. The Queen absolutely adored her, showering her in affection and sweets at every opportunity. If anything, I was more worried about Xinya drowning in a mountain of sweets or being smothered in Pollen’s chest than anything else. However, the Queen Bee seemed well aware of her own strength and was gentle with the little girl.

I gave the little girl a tight hug before I set off into the forest.

“Why do you have to go?” she asked. I smiled and knelt next to her.

“As I recall, you said much the same to your dad before the storm, yes? Remind me what it was he said that time?” I remembered perfectly well, but I wanted her to say it.

“‘Those who can must help those who cannot.’”

“Your mother’s words, if I recall.”

She nodded. “But, why can’t Cherry Blossom or Rose Thorn go? You’re hunting other beasts, right? They’re strong.”

“Hey! I’m strong, too, you know,” I protested. “I’ll be fine. Pollen needs me to be a neutral party and talk some sense into the other beasts. I’ll be back before you know it.”

“Can I keep Chiho, at least?”

“It’s going to get spoiled, at this rate,” I muttered to the little pin as it zipped around the little girl’s head and settled into her hair. “One of these days, Chiho, you’ll have to come with me on a mission, and I’ll find out you’re rusty.”

Chiho trilled angrily and zipped over to poke my nose. I batted it gently away, but it continued its assault. Only after its tirade was complete did it drift back to Xinya and set about braiding her hair, using small amounts of wind qi to manipulate the strands. I just smiled and rolled my eyes at its mischief.

“Be good for Pollen,” I instructed the little girl. “Remember what I taught you. When I’m back, we’ll start in greater detail.”

Xinya nodded and wrapped her arms around my neck in a tight hug. I squeezed her back, then stood and turned to the southwest. Part of me felt a little bad for leaving her behind so quickly after she lost her father, but duty called. This safe haven needed to be protected, and, without knowing more about the struggle between the insect colonies, I couldn’t ensure her safety, even here.