Kai hangs his legs out the window of my El Camino as we speed down the highway ahead of Kay and Daamin. The two of them chose to be road buddies. We could have taken one car but Kay still doesn’t like me and that’s fine because I want to shoot her again. We’ve got a GPS mark for the next set of data but Kay didn’t give us much more information. The next piece of code is also in the badlands which makes me wonder why Kay thought anyone would find the actual answers to beat the game. Sure people play in the badlands but most of those people do so because they’re into hunting mutated animals and trying to live off the grid.

“You think you can photograph in the game,” Kai asks staring at me.

“What is wrong with you,” I laugh and look away from Kai.

“Don’t get nervous now, we’re just talking about shenanigans. There’s no shame in that. It’s just a part of life.”

“You don’t need to give me the birds and the bees.”

“I’m just saying, there’s a lot of feeling in these games. The VR systems let us taste food, feel the breeze, cold splash of the ocean. We don’t need to, but we can pee and poop and it feels real. I’m sure we can have shenanigans, it’s just positions and emotional investments. But can we, you know, complete the deed.”

“This is weird.”

“We’ve talked about shenanigans before.”

“Yeah, but there was context there. Right now, you’re just asking off the wall questions out of nowhere.”

“I’m asking because there have to be people who fall in love playing the game right?”

“I can see that happening. People fall in love anywhere.”

I focus on the road and try to drive faster, ignoring Kai and his questions. Occasionally I’ll look over and see what he’s doing. He’s still just riding, playing a game on his data pad, but sometimes I catch him looking at me. He’ll smile and laugh when he sees me but doesn’t say anything. Eventually he puts away his data pad and starts staring at me again.

“Why are you so prudish?”

“I’m not a prude.”

“We’re just talking about shenanigans; you act like I’m trying to shenanigan you up or something.”

“Please never say that again.”

“Say what?”

Stolen content warning: this content belongs on Royal Road. Report any occurrences.

“That you’re trying to shenanigans me up.”

Kai bursts into laughter, “okay, I won’t say I’m trying to shenanigans you up. But can I ask how many women have you had shenanigans with?”

“If I answer will you drop the shenanigans topic?”

“Absolutely not, so you should just tell me.”

“Six.”

“Really, at 30 and you’ve got six under you belt?”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“I thought you’d have more. You’re a nice guy, with a good job, you treat people well.”

“I’m just not into casual shenanigans. I usually don’t partake in shenanigans when I’m not in a committed relationship with,” part of me is annoyed saying this to Kai but it’s easy to speak to him.

“How many dates before you put out,” he laughs.

“I don’t know, depends on the woman. I just go on the vibe. Enough about me, what about you?”

“I’ve only slept with two women,” he shrugs.

“But you were interrogating me?”

“It made you awkward. It’s cute when you blush,” he pinches my cheek.

I push his hand away, “I’m trying to drive here.”

Kai doesn’t say anything for a while, then quickly asks, “do you think Daamin and Kay are having shenanigans?”

“Absolutely. Why didn’t you just say that was the point of all these questions?”

“I told you, I like to see you all flustered.”

“I’m going to crash the truck and take us both out.”

“Alright, alright, but what do you think they did when we were away?”

“I think they’re both super nerds and they have little nerd fights that get them both turned on.”

“You think so,” Kai smiles showing all of his teeth.

“It has to be right? She’s a terrible person and he’s a lizard man. Still, she insists on riding in the car with just him. Any of us could call a four seater car, but she wants to ride with just him. Unless she really has a thing for lizards, then that’s the only answer.”

“Alright, let’s talk about something else, I’m starting to picture them in bed and I don’t need that in my head,” Kai pauses and lets us regain our composure. “I’ve got another question.”

“Alright, go ahead.”

“What was it like when you died? I know I tracked you down and saved your memory, but what did you feel during all of that?”

“Honestly, it wasn’t terrible. Right after I got hit, everything just went dark, and it stayed that way. It was like my mind was just moving through darkness, but unable to think of anything. I was aware of who I was. I kept telling myself I was Alexandre, then I’d lose the thought. I knew I existed but couldn’t put it together.”

“Sounds liberating, like a sensory deprivation tank.”

“You use a sensory deprivation tank?”

“Once or twice. It’s supposed to be the same kind of experience as a drum circle back before I was around.”

“A drum circle? You’re really Indigenous? Not just role playing?”

“Yeah, did you think you were the only one who did a face scan?”

“I was starting to think so. So many people look the same. It’s like 2010 when every video game character looked like Nathan Drake.”

“Okay, I see where you’re coming from and points have been made,” Kai laughs.

“So are the tattoos real too?”

“Everything but my height and the muscles. I’m really 5’8, it took me a while to figure out. When I got glitched swapping characters I defaulted to my actual scan which wasn’t much different. I got my main avatar’s skills and inventory but clothing was all Lady Kai.”

“Well it’s good to meet the real Kai.”

“The real Kai? You’re cheesy.”

“I’m cheesy? You’ve got a lot of nerve, I should kick you out of my truck.”

“You act like I don’t have a car. I’ve got lots of cars.”

“Are you should be driving? You did hit someone earlier.”

“Oh, you’ve got jokes.”