Respin

The search for the small chitinous creatures almost drives him crazy. At one point he and Serfin are forced to separate to cover more area faster. They need all the time they can get since the likelihood that someone else finds the creature grows by the second. In the case either of them finds the creature, they would contact each other via their communication devices on their belts.

But once they are on separate paths Respin feels his throat tightening. He can't be sure that the small creature is on board. It might as well could be his still frayed nerves acting up.

Multiple times he tries to use his psychic ability, but he can't concentrate enough. Every time he closes his eyes he sees the small creature squashed by Slicer or any other Menkar.

It drives him insane.

Only as he enters the lower much less frequented areas of the Starblazer, he manages to calm down a bit. Despite the sounds being amplified by the vastness of the bowls, Respin feels more at ease. It is the same as with the sounds of the look-out. If the sounds are mechanical, he can ignore them.

Yet the uncertainty gnaws at him and clouds his sixth-sense.

Moving around the darkness of the lower part, Respin is glad he has always a flashlight in his hyperspace-bracelet. Although Menkar can see in the dark, there must be at least some degree of light present. Therefore, the engineers of the Fleet have created a special UV-refracting paint. But to use this paint the UV-light on the walkway need to be turned on and Respin is too nervous to do so.

Holding the flashlight as if it could save him should someone find him, he moves on. He feels sickened by the thoughts of what Slicer might do to the small critter. To save it is the only valuable payback for the help it has offered. But Respin has to keep those thoughts of failure away. With them occupying his mind he can be certain that they will turn real.

I need to concentrate! He reminds himself -- the only other sound around him is the clicks of the claws of his feet. Oh, why do I have to be such useless mess all the time? Why can't I be more like Fin? He isn't afraid to do what's necessary. No matter the outcome. No matter the price.

All the twists and turns of the walkways and the pitch-black abyss below them make him feel like he walks around the entrails of a colossal beast. A beast all too aware where he is. A beast waiting for the right moment to get him. Claws and teeth ready to tear flesh apart.

After some time he must slow down and collect himself. His paranoia flairs up again and again. It can't go on like this. He can't go on like this.

Exhausted he leans against one of the pipes right next to him. To his relief he has passed the meshed walkways. The abyss is gone and replaced by pipes, tubes and cables running underneath the walkway. To his surprise he has found his way to the Recuperation Section deep down in the ship. Most crew members don't like to go near there. After all, this is the place where all those who get fatally wounded are kept in stasis. This is done, so they can either receive the necessary treatment of theatre important enough or for them to survive long enough for their judgment and execution.

A slight tingle in his ears makes Respin turn around. He isn't sure, but he has the feeling that someone is behind him. Afraid to be caught by some meandering guards, he hides behind the great pipes right next to him. Hasty, he turns off the flashlight, as he holds his breath and listens with upright ears.

For few very long moments he only hears his heartbeat and blood flowing through his head. After a while his twitching ears pick up the hum of the various machines, devices and engines. But before he gets comfortable again, he makes out heavy steps and two voices. They are too far off for him to make out even one legible word. Careful to remain hidden he raises his head over the pipe. In the distance the UV-lights suddenly turn on. A mere second later he can see two Menkar approaching.

First, he thinks they are some guards, but then he recognises the horns of one of them. Those upright slightly curved outward horns belong to Captain Slicer. Respins guts tightens in fear. The other one with the short horns and a strange optical device dominating the right half of his face, Respin doesn't recognise. Judging from the pale uniform this ought to be a member of the science-unit.

Suddenly, the UV-light right beside Respin is turned on. Startled he ducks behind the pipe and tries to calm his breathing. All the while the two come closer into hearing range.

"… strange occurrences?" asks Slicer with his bumming aggressive voice echoing clear above the mechanical hum.

"Not that I know of, Sir," replies his much smaller companion in a nasal tone. "The good gal sleeps soundly without any disturbances, Sir."

"Girl?" he wonders and stops right in front of the door and close to Respin's hiding spot.

"I could only perform a few tests on 'er, Sir." he says in fawning tone "A few genetic ones, but I don't want to bore you, Sir."

"Then you know what species she is?"

"Unfortunately… No, Sir. The only results I got were just an 'andful of sequences that just partly resemble the sequences of our species. Sir."

"So she almost a Menkar?"

"No, Sir, I don't think so. But she might be a missing link considering our specie’s evolution."

"And what's that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing of note to your plans, Sir. But there’s another problem, Sir.“

“What problem?”

"Well, yes, Sir. But the problem is she fits the description of the god this cult on Cetus talks about. The pale god or however they call it… I tell you more while showing you the specimen."

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The sliding door opens with a hiss. A second later Respin hears how Slicer and his companion enter the Recuperation-Section. He knows he should continue to look for the black chitinous creature, but the information he has eavesdropped has numbed his entire body. What was I thinking? he reprimands himself, cold sweat collecting on his brow. It was clear from the beginning that she is not a Menkar. But what is she? And the Cult of the Pale God? What's that supposed to mean?

—

Time flies by while different scenarios play through Respin’s head. All the while a shiver runs down his spine to the tip of his tail. Can they be sure this creature has something to do with the Cult of the Pale God? He doubts that the Empress would appreciate this whatsoever regarding the weapon-thing. There’s also another problem.

The connection to the Cult means bad news one way or the other. Just as every ordinary Menkar, Respin knows only rumours about the Cult.

Uncertain he stands up, ready to continue to look for the small chitinous creature. Simultaneously, he hears the door to the Recuperation-Section open behind him with a hiss. Out of pure instinct he lets himself drop back behind the pipes. As he hits the ground, pain explodes at the base of his tail. He suppresses the yelp and bites his lips while covering his mouth with both hands to avoid any possible sound. Being found while eavesdropping on the Captain is another all too easy way to get executed.

"I need to make further tests on 'er, Sir. We don't want 'er to go after you, once your plan 'as come into motion. Right, Sir?"

"Do whatever you need to do, but don't let anyone notice."

"Understood, Sir."

Respin hears, or better feels how something bangs against the pipe he’s hiding behind.

"I'm not kidding, Lappor!" Sliced growls and slams beats his fist against the metal. "If you can't hold your mouth, I'll personally murder you and the Mudswimmers you have told about it. And I promise you that it will be a long and painful process."

"Understood, Sir!" yelps Lappor with fear dripping from every word. "I'll keep my mouth shut, Sir!"

Suddenly multiple people coming closer. Whoever it is seems to have important news for Slicer. They have found out, haven't they? Respin thinks sweating profusely. They've found the creature…

"Captain Slicer! Sir, the Empress, She has sent you a message regarding the weapon! You are expected to answer immediately!"

"And you are expected to use the communicators in such cases, instead of running around the ship!" he shouts, then he turns once again to Lappor snarling. "I have my eyes on you, Lap."

Respin hears how Lappor slides down the pipe. Meanwhile, the guards and Slicer hurry away. Slow Respin drops his hands down and moves into a slightly better position, considering he sat up to this point on his tail. A fraction of a second later he freezes again.

Something has touched him.

Something warm.

A second later he hears someone land on the walkway with a very soft almost inaudible thud. Lappor gasps and jumps to his feet.

"By the Gods of the Void!" he exhales panting. "Don't frighten me like that."

Someone answers but the words are too faint for Respin to hear.

"I know! I know! I know! Don't bother me like this! … No! I can't do that! … Please! I'm trying my best! … Not enough? By the Void, can't you leave a poor ol' chap in peace? 'e plans something, yes, but I can't interfere with 'im. … Why?! Because 'e'll have me killed! The plan was that I get out alive! … Okay, fine. But not now. We have two weeks until we arrive at Cetus and I don't want to cause this cruiser to break apart in the middle of interstellar space."

A few moments later Respin feels something jump through the air to disappear in the dark. Lappor remains a moment very still. Then, with a sigh, he scurries off mumbling to himself.

Respin doesn't dare to move for the next couple of minutes. The fear that there is someone or something who could see him keeps him glued to the ground. Besides, his brain needs time to process the information he has just obtained.

—

After catching his breath and calming his racing heart, Respin stumbles back on his feet. With a worried expression, he looks over the pipe to see if he’s truly alone. Breathing relief, he walks around the great pipe and finds himself right in front of the door to the Recuperation-Section. He stops again and looks at the large metallic surface. His distorted reflections on it frowns at him. Through the narrow gap between the sliding doors falls a beam of bluish-white light. Like a cut it draws a straight line across his body and his reflection.

I should be going… he thinks but curiosity gets the better of him. After looking left and right, he steps towards the door. It opens with a hiss.

The Recuperation-Section is bigger than he imagined. Empty plexiglass tanks line the walls and run in tight rows across the wall. Although Respin has never been in and has never seen someone inside one, he feels queasy.

This queasiness gets amplified by the fact they have put the pale creature into one of the tanks in the back of the room. Yet, despite his stomach tightening and his heart racing he walks towards it.

I shouldn't be here, he thinks and slows down. But he doesn't stop. It almost feels as if I don't have a real choice. Once Respin has reached the illuminated tank, he needs a moment to collect himself before he looks at the pale creature in it.

They have dressed this so-called weapon in the usual Recuperation-Patches. A light blue very lose tunic, floating around her like a spectral illusion, and pants of the same color. A translucent mask is placed on her face, which means she isn't able to breath underwater. In regular intervals silvery bubbles raise to the top of the tank. All of this framed by the vast mass of her silvery-white hair, of which a few strains coil like tentacles around her body.

Respin looks at her and the mesmerizing patterns on her pale skin, created by the current and the soft blue light illuminating her from above. The thought that not only the Empress wants to use her as weapon but also Slicer, makes Respin sad and very angry. This can‘t be this pale god they talked about, he ponders. A god wouldn't let themself be confined and used like this. Respin lowers his gaze and frowns. All of this shouldn't be of any concern to me. I'm just a simple, albeit bad Bladedancer and nothing more than a worthless soldier. Why do I worry about this being, whatever it might be? All I should be concerned with are my orders. Why do I feel like this? What's wrong with me?

Slow his thoughts move back to the Cult. The things he has heard about its teachings cross his mind like a soft ray of light. He could quit his service and become a follower of it. The Empire would hunt him down for this frivolity, sure. But everything is better than to help the Empress or anyone else in this madness. A smile crosses his face as he thinks about it. But then Serfin's face appears in his mind. He would follow Respin without a doubt, but he is sure that this isn’t what his Bondmate wants. With a loud crack his communication device interrupts Respins thoughts and makes him almost jump up to the ceiling.

„Respin, do you copy?“ asks Serfin very loud — almost too loud.

Dammit! I've forgotten I have it on! he thinks while pulling it off from his belt. By the Void! I'm so lucky Fin didn't call me while Slicer and Lappor were still around!

„I’m all ears,“ he says into it after taking a deep breath.

„I’ve found him,“ Serfin replies. „We meet at our room.“

„Roger,“ he responds and turns the device off.

Once again, he glances up at the weapon's face before he goes. There is something ethereal, beautiful and calm about this being.

With a sigh Respin turns around but freezes a second later. Her eyes… he wonders and looks back at her. Were her eyes not a bit open a moment before?

Feeling overworked and tired, Respin shakes his head and leaves the Recuperation-Section. He does so as fast and silent as possible.

During his way up to the living-quarters he is neither seen nor heard by anyone on the ship.