I’m conscious, yet I refuse to face the reality.
I’ve only just woken up a few seconds ago, but I can’t bear to open my eyes. I know where I am. But by keeping my eyes close, I can at least imagine the place I wish to be. A room filled with words, pictures, and colors. A place where things make sense.A place away from here.
If someone were watching me, they would not understand. If someone could read my every thought, they would clueless.
What does he mean I wouldn’t understand?-
Being trapped here comes with un-explainable pain. A ominous feeling radiates from this place, constantly shredding my sanity like sandpaper. The physical pain is not much, but the constant grinding I feel is like torture.
i try to imagine the room with the books but the image doesn’t last too long. Instead its interrupted by a door opening.
I hear steps getting closer from my left side, and feel a gentle touch on my forehead. I slowly open my eyes to meet the glance of the person standing next to my bed. Not out of curiosity for who it was because i knew before she entered the room, but simply because i hoped she could see my desperation to leave.
———————————————————————-
[Nurse Karlin]
Today is the day to give him the news.
Walking down these blue corridors always felt uneasy, but today that burden was lifted off my shoulders, after many days patients have gotten better, the hospital no longer as busy like it was the day the accident happened.
After talking to Dr.Park and other Senior Doctors in the facility, they came up with a solution, a weird solution, one that was sent to administration. It was initially denied, but after more careful observation, extensive rephrasing, and the pull of strings by Dr.Park, the original proposal was passed.
Hanniel is being let outside the hospital. Of course not alone, he will be accompanied by doctor park, a security member of the ward facility, and I.
To my surprised, Han has not been sent to a rehabilitation facility yet, which is already an odd occurrence, but apart from the Chief Executive, the board of directors and senior staff, Dr.Park has always been given a lot of lee way, no hospital would spend so much resources on someone who has just woken up from a coma that lasted nearly a decade. Its already bizarre enough to let a person like Hanniel outside the hospital, considering his unstable condition. It seems like the situation is different than what I had thought. For administration and the other Senior Staff to let this happen. I wonder what Doctor Park must’ve done for this to be allowed.
In front of me is a door, I open it confidently, I know he won’t be able to run out like last time thanks to the security man standing outside , I walk closer and sit down on the chair next to the bed. Hanniel, arms, and legs were tied to the bed.
There is no reaction in Han.
I reach for his forehead to try and wipe off the sweat coming off of him, Han’s eyes slowly open, his eyes a deep black color, mysterious like an abyss, almost lifeless. Just meeting his gaze and keeping eye contact with him is hard enough.
“Hey Han, I am here to tell you good news. Dr.Park and I will be bringing you to a place we think you’ll like. Administration has agreed to let you go there but only on the condition that you have to behave”, I softly tell him the news.
His eyes come back to life, like a fire being ignited, he seems excited so I continue to share with him the details,
“We’ll be bringing you to the local library which isn’t too far. It is scheduled for the day after tomorrow early in the morning”, his glaring eyes now full of life. I’ve finally been able to help this patient which we’ve been hopelessly failing. Even if its only relaying the news, it still warms my heart to see him lively again.
——————————————————
[Dr.Park]
‘What do you mean we can’t let him leave?, even if we do not have the luxury to do that for every patient, if it’s a request of mine, it is for a reason.’- I rebutted at them.
I sat in a chair by the side of a long table, it was a large staff meeting which we’ve been doing a lot more recently than ever before. The large scale ‘incident’ which is still being investigated by the police and FBI really strained the already scarce resources of our hospital, but as the days keep going its finally starting to calm down, at least compared to how it was.
‘You all know more than anyone else in this faculty how much I’ve given up in this hospital. Not only on my own personal life, but also in my own professional one. If I have ever done something it has been for a reason and you all are my witnesses . Director John, Mark, Layla and Mia, why is it that I am being doubted now?’, I spoke out my mind to them.
“This small request of yours is not being denied, but we are simply questioning why its so important that this patient of yours…” The director flips a paper reading out the contents “…Called Hanniel needs so much attention. After his attempt of trying to run away yesterday, words are starting to spread around the hospital, and not only that, but is there a reason as to why you did not report the records of Hanniel to us?, we found his patient files, we know he was in a coma for 10 years”.
Stolen from its rightful place, this narrative is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.
I could only keep rebutting them, “Had I reported those papers he would’ve been sent to another facility, as you can see in the records, he has no immediate family he would’ve been forced to stay in the rehabilitation facility all alone with no hope of getting out. He was found in the back streets of the city, by his current appearance he must’ve been 12 at the time he was found, he must have an indefinite amount of brain damage which no other facility in the state is qualified enough to treat. There is just no other facility with the capabilities, and there is simply no one more qualified than me in this hospital to help Han”.
“Doctor Park, I am not disagreeing with what it is that you are doing, but please be transparent next time. The reason for this questioning is to get you out of digging yourself a deeper hole. helping this patient will most likely be a bigger problem for you and us, if anything happens, it will be directly your responsibility as the most Senior Neurologist of this institute, and we trust in your decision. Your denied request will be re-accessed, and I hope you wont waste many resources on this ‘project’ of yours like before, you are free to leave.”
‘Thank you, Director, but he is not a ‘project’”, I stood from my chair and began to leave the room.
“now onto the next topic, about or budget decreasing again for this upcoming year…” the director quickly changed the focus, and started talking about business again.
The administrators and other directors began to discuss among themselves, No more than 15 or so people were in that room. The director knew I hated these gatherings so she allowed me to skip them, but as i was leaving she said some words that cough my attention
“we expect the governmental funds to keep lowering as tensions withing the other states keep rising….” My footsteps slow down.
“…and we have insider information about possible uprisings to begin within the next few years…“I completely stop just as i began to open the door,
“‘incidents’ like the most recent one has already happened multiple times within other states and are being covered up by officers and FBI, they have finally reached us, but not yet at large scale, so we must begin preparations…” After flipping a few papers the director began talking in detail about such preparations.
I turned around and sat back in my seat, I decided to join for this gathering.
——————————————————————————-
[Hanniel]
Through the dark tinted windows I could see the snow white streets.
Its an early morning, I can see people every now and then. Their colors so vastly different from that of the people in the hospital, they were more alive, It feels warm just seeing them.
We pass by many different large buildings, none familiar to me, they looked far different from the hospital.
We make a stop,and I see through the window, a small shop in the corner. A low metal fence around the store with no gates, only there for decoration with fancy looking metal black chairs and tables neatly organized within the fences, with people passing by.
I could see that the store’s inside is mostly empty except for a pair that was leaving from the entrance, and took seat on the cold metal chairs, why did they choose to be outside when the indoor looked so cozy?. They began drinking from a cup spitting smoke, and happily talked. I could warmth coming from one, the color he gave off was a passionate light red, as if wanting to burst, it radiated, yet something was holding it back, the color wanted to change. Yet the color of the other was a yellowish blue, not so passionate, as if confused as to why she was there.
The girl looked away and landed in my direction, as if being able to see through the dark glass, our eyes met and I understood a bit better, that even outside the hospital, painful feelings were also common.
We started moving through the streets once more, and my view of the pair dissipated.
As we kept going, more and more people started to appear, streets slowly starting to get crowded, some in fancy black clothes, some in not so fancy clothing, some small people in similar clothes gathering around a bus. The amount of people were too many, yet I wasn’t overwhelmed, instead, this feeling of being surrounded by so many felt nice, still, I could feel an unease around the people.
we stopped again at another corner, and from the window’s view I could see a big panel attached to a building, a lady in a suit appeared, the same lady i saw in the screen before, and the news started to play.
“It has been a week since the catastrophe in the subway last Tuesday night, November 21st 2035. The numbers as of today have been confirmed with 584 casualties 275 injured, 184 people critically injured, 87 Fatalities and 12 people still missing and 26 trapped in the rubble, the situation has began to stabilize as the hospitals are no longer overwhelmed and Investigations about this catastrophic incident has begun to bear fruits. with most rescue teams starting to slow down search, hope for the few people trapped is grim.”
The light turned green and we began moving away from the large screen “So far initial investigations have focused on the rail system that is far too old and outdated, said investigations claim that could be the main rea—-” The sounds coming from the screen dying in the distance.
We pass by a few more streets until we make our final stop.
From the car’s window I can make out letters, “A.L Lozac Library” I read to myself out loud. The door on the left side opened, the buff guy with white clothing that has been looking at me the entire time left through said door. Karlin fallows behind him, closing the door on her way out. I hear something opening, and hear buff man in white clothing taking something out.
“You’ll be fine Han, Karlin and I will take care of you, we want to be with you while you get better”, Dr.Park told me from the seat in front of me.
The door on my right that I was leaning on openned, I lost my balance, but Karlin grabbed me by the shoulder to stop my sudden fall. The man in blue clothing behind her, setup that horrible thing again. Karlin grabs my hand and leads me towards the wheelchair.
“I don’t need that,”
The man in white clothing let go off the wheelchair, and takes a step towards me, I hear the car’s front door close.
“That’s fine, he can walk” said Dr.Park.
The man in white tries to protest,
“But Dr.Park, I was directed specifically by administration to tie him to the wheelchair, just in case something happened”.
“Matthew, do you remember who you turned to when your sister was caught in the accident last Tuesday?, It was hard explaining why the area she was in needed an extra doctor.”
The man in white stayed quiet, and Karlin did too, as if she heard nothing. Dr.Park moved in front of me, he grabbed my hand and let me out of the car.
In front of me stood a large building, many windows in all sides, it radiated ice cold silence, yet my gut felt the warm charming whispers hidden within. Dr.Park moved ahead, staying in front of me, showing me the way.
By the front door another figure stood, a man dressed in all dark colors, Dark Gray pants, A black long-sleeved turtle neck, black shoes, with black socks, his deep dark barely brown eyes showed a deepness to him, and his black hair shows flow, moving in symphony with the air. Everything about him seemed so deep, I felt an odd discomfort.
“So by the way he is looking into me, I am guessing this is Han?”
The man and Dr.park shook hands.
“Let me introduce myself, I am ‘forced to retire big shot who now works as the librarian of this place’, you may call me Buck” said the man in all black.