“No.” I glare at John. “Did you arrange this?”

She looks from me to him and back. “What did I say?”

“Chuck’s heading home,” John says. “Canada.”

“Oh. And there’s nothing I can say to convince you to stay? We can use all the people we can gather. I mean, you wouldn’t have to stay, stay. I’d be happy to open a trade route with Mount Johnson, and you could travel back and forth.”

I glare at her. I purposefully mold my face. Narrow my eyes, scrunch my brows, tighten my lips.

She keeps looking at me.

That usually makes them step away, at the very least. She stays in her chair opposite me.

“That’s a no then? I’m sorry to hear that, well not hearing a yes, but I do understand, I think. But is Canada still a thing after this?”

“My home is in Toronto. My mother’s there.”

“And is she…”

I motion around us. “None of this matters. She’s there. I’m going to be there in time for her birthday.”

She nods. “Well, if you find that the place isn’t as you remember it, you and her are welcome to move here.” She smiles. “But, with that taken care of, we can discuss payment for you helping the town. All the people you brought, it’s a big service, so that deserves a payment of some sort.”

I snort. “Just make sure they all stay here and you’re doing me a favor.” I look at John. “We can leave in the night. That way, they won’t realize until morning and it’s going to be too late for them to latch on to us.”

“I wouldn’t recommend traveling at night,” she says.

“She’s right,” John adds before I can tell her what I think of her opinion. I have no interest in spending willpower on her. But I have to spend some not to snap at him.

“You,” I say, “me, Terry, and Elizabeth will have no problem keeping Patricia safe for one night.”

“You’re forgetting Hanz and Deloy, maybe Albert.”

“They’re staying.”

“Have you run that by them?” Patricia asks.

“Deloy’s a kid. This place seems like they have no problem with non-humans. He and Hanz will be fine.”

“Deloy is—” She stops when John puts a hand on her arm.

“That’s something for once we’re closer to leaving. As is when we’ll be leaving. I know you want to leave as soon as possible, Chuck, but we should make a plan first. See if anyone knows what the road ahead looks like. Where the next settlement is.”

“You can get food, at least,” Amanda says.

“That might be the one thing we don’t need to worry about with Chuck around,” Patrica says with a chuckle.

“Water is something we should stock,” John says. “There’s no way to know if we’re going to be able to drink what we come across. Terry’s been so gung-ho about being a combat mage he hasn’t taken a water purification spell yet. He promised it’s the next one, but he just crossed a level, so it could take a while until he gets another spell point.”

“We have five wells,” Amanda says, “and we’ve been taking all the water we’re allowed each day and putting that in cisterns.”

“There’s a limit?” Patricia asks.

“Each well gives out enough water per day for the daily needs of five hundred people. We’re limited to one well per civilized zone. We were just under two thousand before you arrived, and the only limit on cisterns is the material needed to build them, so we can spare about a month’s worth of water for seven people, even with the influx.”

“You can only build wells in civilized spaces?” John asks.

“No, each ‘tile’ can have a well, but the lower the civilized rating, the less water it produces. We were lucky that Cross Junction was spread so that we started with these five tiles just at the low end of civilized. With this influx, I’m going to have to work out if it’s more efficient to gain a new tile or raise those we have to the next level.”

“Then I hope that works out,” John says, “but yes, we’ll take the water.” He looks me over. “Do you have anyone who can make clothing with some level of armor rating? Chuck’s not having any luck keeping his in one piece.”

She nods. “We have a few leather workers, and Pawel should be able to reinforce them. It’s my understanding you brought a good supply of metals.”

“How long will that take?” John asks before I can protest. It’s like he’s trying to keep me here among all these people for as long as possible.

“You’ll have to ask them,” Amanda says.

I contemplate the untouched mug of beer before me. I am not someone you want to have his inhibitions lowered. I push it away and stand. “You clearly don’t need me.” I walk out into the sun.

I want out.

It’s that simple. I want to find North and start walking.

Well? No opinions?

I really don’t like the silence.

I did promise we’d stick together.

Really? No comment?

Fuck. Just when I need you, so I’ll know what you want me to do, and do the opposite.

Without him as motivation, I take the hit to my willpower and wander the town, keeping away from people as much as I can.

* * * * *

“You aren’t the easiest guy to find,” John said just before I swing the hammer down on the rock and shatter it.

I found the quarry an hour within my walk and offered to help, with the condition they put me away from everyone else. I’ve been turning large stones into smaller ones for a couple of hours now. Not as satisfying as pounding a monster to pulp, but if I imagine the stones as John’s head, there is some satisfaction in it.

“Didn’t think you needed me.” Stone dust and pebbles fly with another hit.

If you discover this narrative on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen. Please report the violation.

“You can’t be angry I took over the negotiations, Chuck. We both know you—”

I slam the hammer hard enough on the stone it goes through it and ends up a foot in the stony ground.

“Or maybe you are.”

I glare at him, and he takes a step back, raising his hands placatingly.

“What I’m annoyed about is that you wanted me there, with that woman, just so you could laugh.”

“I—” he closes his mouth. “Okay, that was a small part of it.”

The admission surprises me, and I have to remind myself not everyone in the world lives to shift the blame.

“But I also wanted you there because her asking for us to stay isn’t a decision I can make for you.”

I roll my eyes. “You know damned well what my answer was going to be.” I pull the hammer out and move to another large stone. They’re lined up like someone placed them there overnight for all of us to hammer away and turn them into gravel of varying size.

“You could have changed your mind, or her offer could have made you change your mind.”

I snort and break the stone into two with one blow.

“Anyway, that’s not why I’m here. We agreed we needed to talk, Chuck. I was going to suggest we go back to the tavern for a drink, but this is isolated enough. If you’re willing to stop swinging that hammer and sit, we can do that now.”

I consider him, the stone, and my willpower, then put the hammer down and talk a long swallow of water. I send the water skin back to my inventory as I sit on one half and start munching on dried meat.

John sits cross-legged on the other half and waits.

Don’t. Is all my father says.

So, you’re still around. That’s too bad.

“I have problems,” I state, and John nods. “According to the system, all I suffer from is mild Paranoia, a case of bad temper, and I’m not all that keen on being around other people. I didn’t take medication, before you ask. I grew up learning to deal with stuff myself. As you can guess, it mainly consisted of not being around people.” I look at the dried meat in my hand. “And eating. I’ve always been a stress eater. One of the reasons I work out.”

“One reason?”

“People tend to avoid you, when you look like you can crush their heads without meaning to. It’s also something I could get lost in for a while.”

“Like when you pull the pickup.”

I nod. “Or break the stones, before you showed up.”

“If you’re so antisocial, why did you pick Guardian as your class? I’ve looked over the description, and its advantage is in being around others.”

“It was that or the assassin class,” I say, taking another bite.

“That’s… kind of an extreme gap between them.”

So, how much can I tell him?

Nothing.

“My upbringing wasn’t the best, as you can probably guess. My dad… Well, he wasn’t great. My mom worked hard at balancing his influence. I have no idea how she survived what he put her through and still had enough goodness to look after me. When the system happened and I looked through the classes, I went for fighting, because it’s what I’ve been doing my entire life. Assassin was because on seeing it, I could imagine myself murdering my old man.”

“He’s still alive?”

I shrug. “The asshole ran out on us when I was seventeen. Went out to hang out with ‘the boys’ and never came back.” I go back to eating and John remains silent. “My mother, she was always telling me to use my anger in a positive way. Make it fuel for good changes, instead of letting it fester inside me. I’ve never been great at that, but when I saw the guardian class, I thought of her. How being the assassin would be playing the role my father wanted out of me, how being a guardian would be honoring her.”

I shrug.

“I’m sure she’ll be proud of you when she sees you again.”

I shrug again.

“So, how do we go forward?” he asks.

I snort. “Unless you missed it, I’m not exactly the best at making plans. Most of mine, up till now, have been to move ahead and shoulder anything in my way out of it.”

“And you’re realizing you can’t continue that way, otherwise, you wouldn’t have initiated this conversation.”

“Yeah, but that doesn’t mean I know what to do. Going off on my own basically got me dead. It’s you, being a stubborn asshole and spitting at what I wanted that kept that from happening. My stubbornness would have gotten me killed. Yours saved me. I’m slow on the uptake, not deaf to it.”

“Then what we need to do is communicate.”

“Lie, you mean.”

He looks at me. “I’m not sure I understand.”

“What’s communication? It’s you telling me what you think I want to hear, and me doing the same.”

“Do you… actually believe that?”

“No.” I finish two pieces of jerky, then tap my head. “Here, I know that’s bullshit.” I go to tap my heart and stop. “Emotionally? I’ve been lied to my entire youth. My dad didn’t just manipulate me directly, he arranged things so that it looked like everyone was doing it, except him. It took way too many years after he left before I realized that. But it’s there, his voice warning me, anytime one of you opens his mouth. I’m ready for all the ways you’re going to try to manipulate me.”

“That doesn’t sound like an easy way to live.”

“Hence, paranoia, the mild kind.”

He nods. “Why didn’t you abandon us?”

I raise an eyebrow. “You think I didn’t try? Those first days, I kept telling the lot of you to leave me alone. I’d start walking, and you’ll fall into step behind me. I thought you’d stay in Harrisonburg. That I was finally free from the lot of you. Then…” I focus on eating.

He doesn’t press, and I consider glaring at him.

“It’s Terry,” I finally say.

“I’d figured he played a part.”

“He’s so fucking earnest, and not in an irritating way, the way Deloy can be. He’s there with answers, if I have questions. He’ll point out stuff I can do better when he notices it, but he doesn’t act like I have to do what he tells me. I know he’s a kid, and that’s probably why, but do you know how rare it is not to be told what to do?”

He chuckles. “That one, I do know. And I have skills in picking up how serious people are about it, which I expect you lack.”

“Try, can’t get.”

“That might not be true anymore. The system has options to buy skills.”

“Which we can’t do because whatever store they’re in isn’t accessible.”

“That’ll probably change at some point. But in the meantime, you’re left with practicing it until you gain the skill.”

“And how do I practice figuring out when people are only suggesting I do something instead of ordering me to do it?”

“By trusting they aren’t looking to manipulate you.”

“I’m guessing you aren’t seeing the problem with that.”

“You can’t look back on our interactions and see that I’ve never manipulated you?”

“The tavern?”

“That wasn’t…”

“So you get how hard it is for me to trust that everything you tell me is without selfish intent? And that’s without me having been at the receiving end of so many cons, I know how they work better than most con men. And they all start with gaining the mark’s trust until they no longer have a reason to question what you say. Then, the betrayal happens.”

“Your father?” he asks after hesitating, and I nod.

He lets out a slow breath.

“I’m not trying to be difficult, John. I’m trying to get you to understand the reality I live with. You probably see the world as this safe place where you—” he raises an eyebrow “—okay, before the system. You saw it as safe with the occasional threat. For me, it was dark and menacing all the time, with the occasional light.”

I snort. “The only thing the system’s really changed for me is how difficult it’s been to be alone, and the level of danger. The sense of it?” I shrug. “That’s no different for me. It’s still a dark and menacing world with the occasional light in it.”

He nods. “Okay. Do you want us to stay here?” he raises a hand as I’m about to question his motives. “I didn’t get how hard this has been for you. I figured you were being difficult mainly because you didn’t want to adjust to things. Now, I see you’ve been trying in the small ways you know how. If you tell me that having us around is that much of a hassle, I’ll talk with the others and we’ll part ways.”

Finally.

I eat in silence.

Well? What are you waiting for?

“It has been that much of a hassle, John. But I don’t want to part ways.”

My father’s protest doesn’t come, and that surprises me as much as I expect I’ve surprised John.

“Why?”

“Terry.”

John doesn’t push as I eat.

“Even before Elizabeth told me about his father, I…. I’m not going to do to him what my old man did to me. Even I can see that he’s grown to depend on having me around. He was terrified I’d be angry at him when you rescued me. That I’d think he told you where I was because of our link.”

“What link?”

He didn’t know?

Of course, he didn’t know. How could he? He had no reason to look into the class abilities.

“No,” he says. “You don’t have to tell me. It’s none of my business.”

“You have no idea how much that is the wrong thing to say,” I tell him, and he stares at me. The effort costs me a noticeable sliver of willpower. “I made him my ward. It makes my switch ability more effective on him. And it adds a few more bonuses.”

“I meant it. You didn’t have to tell me.”

“I know. And I’m making a conscious choice to believe you. Which is why I’m telling you. Because you do need to know. I’ve been holding all my abilities to myself and I’m sure more than once you could have made better use of me if you’d known.”

“Alright. Then, how about we start with all of us sitting together, once we know who’ll come with us, and going over what each of us can do? Then, we can keep working on communicating.”

“Who do you have in mind?” I ask with trepidation.

“I think that those who’ve been with us since before Harrisonburg at least deserve a chance to make the choice.”

I go through half a dozen large pieces of jerky before I’m confident I’m not going to just run off when I open my mouth.

“Okay. Let’s do that.”