A rush of familiar feelings. Weightlessness and blinding light. An odd feeling, like I was forgetting something rather important; right there at the tip of my tongue, yet it runs and hides whenever I try to open my mouth to vocalize it.
Looking around, or otherwise attempting to do that, felt strange. There was no wind in my face forcing me to close my eyes, but it felt like I had to make an exaggerated movement to make any progress at all in the direction I wanted to, like moving through Sol’s mirror near the edge of the conclave. The glare in my eyes felt similar to when I attempted to gaze upon Sol in all of his burning glory, an action in which I learned several valuable lessons from. Those being to find and know my limits, and to not try to glint signs of divinity when it doesn’t want to be seen… I saw dots in my vision for the next several cycles, Sol’s way of punishing an overly curious child.
As I finished the labored movement to look to my right, and the lights began to leave my sight, I recognized that I was in the study of the Center, the large building located within the center of our Conclave. The Center being what the Bright called an open air amphitheater, whatever that is, with a raised pedestal in the middle where his Luminous gathered us to provide lessons from the Book of Sol once every seven cycles. The study was located off to one of the sides of the Center, along its outer edge. The Conclave as a whole used the study as a storage of knowledge, so it was not a small building, somewhere between being larger than our standard living arrangement and smaller than the Center of which it was attached to. Given it’s size, the amount of knowledge contained within its walls it always made it feel more cramped than it actually was.
But… I didn’t know why I was here. I very rarely ever came to this building under my own volition, for why would I work outside the influence of Sol, hiding under a roof where one could not feel his touch. If I was here, it would have been for something important, or the busy work the Bright made us do. By Sol, I hope I wasn’t here for that, her work is always so boring like this ancient form of torture she calls algebra, she loves making us suffer through that. Straining to look in front of me from the rows of bookshelves to my right, like moving my head through Sol’s Reflection… to many stray thoughts, I can think about my baptism later. As my head settles in a forward looking position, I see a desk with a pool of my drool next to a book open to what looked like Luna, the not planet that circles Terra.
At seeing that, I twinge in realization. The Bright had given us more busy work, and judging by the pillow… book… in front of me, it was to study up on some of the other religions surrounding the area claimed by Sol. The Church of the Bright Night, one of the larger other religions surrounding Sol, occupied a mountain range, I’m not sure what it was, but if Sol rises off to the right and sets to the left during the time when he is closest to Terra, walk straight for three days and the mountains on which they preside come into view. At least one more days’ journey is required to reach the domain of Bright Night.
So, I’m doing work I’d rather not do, inside a building I never choose to be inside of willingly, doing research on a religion that doesn’t interest me in the slightest. If this was a dream, I would almost be willing to call this a nightmare because its almost everything I don’t like to do. Not that I detest any of this, I’m just old enough to know what is important to me and mine. Not being more than a late Ray myself, Sol is not far from greeting me for my eighteenth trip around his presence. As much as I love the Church and enjoy the lessons that can be gleamed from his Luminous’ teachings, my life does not have me headed toward a life of work in Sol’s church. Work in his presence? Certainly. But not in his church, I’m not good with crowds or words. You know, those qualities which are required to interact with the congregation.
With that in mind I turned to my left to look out one of several windows which lined the study. This time, the motion felt more natural, less like I was moving through a liquid and more like moving through a stiff breeze. When my head reached its destination, I froze, because what I saw coming through the window, or lack thereof, I shouldn’t be able to see anything as it was dark out and candles weren’t allowed within the confines of the Study for fear of a fire breaking out. Getting up from my seat, which went faster than the times I moved my head, I’m met with a brief moment of weightlessness and movements far more exaggerated than intended in my rush to get to the window.
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Nothing. No stars. No moon. No conclave. Just… Nothing. A void.
But, if there is nothing out there, then how is there light in here? Actually making an effort to turn around rather than just simply looking side to side, I spot the reason for why I was able to see. And at this point in time I’m pretty positive that this is a dream as I am looking at a female floating in the air with black hair running the length of her body, and emanating a soft golden yellow glow from the entirety of her body… somehow?
“Divinity, child. That is the answer to the question you are asking yourself currently” the female said, still unable to determine how old she is. “Girl is a perfectly appropriate designation for this particular form you see before.”
… I wish she wouldn’t do that.
“That is one request I will not be able to comply with, not because I cant, I simply find it quite enjoyable seeing how you all react to knowing that your every present thought isn’t as yours only as you all initially thought.”
Just the present thoughts?
“For the most part yes, though there are a few (garbled noise) that can, but they have more abstracted capabilities pertaining to time or some variant thereof.” As confused as I was, she kept going regardless. “This isn’t how I wanted to meet you to talk, so I won’t talk much longer. Time doesn’t really mean much to me.”
... wait, do I know you?
“No, but it’s not the first time we’ve met either. Long story short, I need you to wake up. Because as fascinating as looking through the last thing that went through your mind is, it’s quite taxing on me as you aren’t even within my realm.”
Divinity, no… you’re not Sol. Opening my mouth to try and speak, I feel my mouth and vocal chords move, but the sound doesn’t immediately follow. “Who…… Are……. You…...?”
“Ah yes,” the girl said, a sly smile creeping across her lips. “Now that is a question you already know the answer to. You just need to think about it a little bit.” She floats down from where she was floating, her glow transitioning from golden yellow to a soft blue, making the rest of the study turn dark. “I’ve almost got you to the ground now, we can talk properly here in a moment. Well a moment for me, it might be a few minutes for you.
Before I could even mouth the sentence ‘what are you talking about?’ she vanished. No poof of smoke, no dust outline, no mirage waves. One second there, the next second not. She said that I already knew her, but with an obvious saint like being, even with my bad memory, I’m fairly certain that I wouldn’t forget someone that looked like her. With the disappearance of the girl whom I supposedly know but have no memory of, the light began to slowly return. As it should be, still dark, but I could make outlines of objects again.
With my eyes darting around, I see a similar blue glow coming from where I was sitting initially similar to the glow surrounding the girl as she left. I attempt to move towards it but the weightless feeling overtakes me again as I end up flinging myself into the chair with minimal effort. Trying to pick myself up, the weightless feeling still upon me, I end up ramming my back into the roof and knocking the air out of my lungs when I hit the desk. Righting myself as best as I could, being getting on my hands and knees with the fewest amount of movements possible. Looking down, my lungs screaming for oxygen but not being able to find any despite having found plenty mere moments ago, I am greeted with the faint blue glow of a moon from the book I was studying.
“Lu……na…..”
That one word took everything I had, and with that, darkness crept in, or so it should have. I jerked up, clawing at the air and gasping for breath.
“Oh good,” a female voice says from off to my right. “You’re awake. So, I have some good news and some not so good news. Which do you want to hear first?”
Looking over at this girl from my dreams, not glowing in any way this time, only one word came to mind after realizing who it was that was in front of me.
“… Shit.”
A slight chuckle, followed by a statement I really didn’t want to hear. “Oh Sol’s dear child, follower of my brother, you have no idea how accurate that statement actually is.”