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Chapter 4

Dying isn't entirely true. I was, once again torn apart, just lying on the ground and unable to move. Somehow my body still refused to die, and I had no regeneration, so I just lay there, crumbling.

Again time passed by. Lost in my situation I just observed. I could have landed at a worse place. Out of the corner of my eyes I could see small isolated clouds moving across the sky. This place knew day and night, and it was strange to actually get a sense of time again.

Although I was unable to do anything, time went by fast, judging by the switching between day and night. How long had I been in the monotonous planes? I was entirely unable to even make a guess.

Finally one day a wanderer came by. He was a human looking man with an unshaved beard. He was dressed in proper traveling gear and had a sun hat on the head.

He looked curiously at me. Sadly I was unable to move and could not even react. Then he stepped closer and prodded me. By now I had been lying here for a few weeks, collected dirt and become very stiff. Must have taken me for a rock or something. After another look he left again.

A few day later, a small traveling group passed by. I wondered, if it was random chance or if the man had told someone of his find and the curious travelers had decided to take a look. They also seemed interested at first, but later moved on. At times they talked, but I was unable to understand the language.

Every once in a while people came by. I was surprised that there were not only humans. I saw some beastmen, dwarfs and one time even an elven woman passed me by. After stilling her curiosity she left the same way all the other did though. One time a man came by who inspected me differently than the others. He carefully looked me over, became lost in thought and studied me some more. He even tested something by touching me a few times. Luckily he refrained from anything creepy. Then he left again.

And then a middle aged woman around fifty came by. Her long, formerly dark hair was graying. She might have once been beautiful and it was still visible, but a few too many years had passed her. Strangely she didn't look like she had struggled at all, because she was completely unaffected by her journey. Her clothes were slightly ragged and dirty though.

One thing that let her stand out among all the other people I had seen so far was her gaze. It had an intensity to it that was rarely seen. With her sharp eyes she was studying me thoroughly. Finally she pulled over her mule and pulled out some potions. Walking over to me she forced me into an upright position. I was actually astonished, that I didn't break into pieces.

She forced the liquid of a potion with a blue hue into my mouth. Quite a bit spilled in the process, because I was unable to gulp it down. Still, some of it must have entered my body because after a short while I could feel my mana regeneration increase strongly. It was even greater than my consumption right now.

Then the woman pulled out a potion of crimson red. This one was also forced down my throat. Finally she sat down next to me and raised her hands above me. A natural feeling energy enveloped me. I would say it was healing me, but I was so broken that I could not discern any difference.

After a while I was laid out on some blankets. The woman waited a few feet next to me, but kept observing me. Then she repeated the process. Whenever the effect of the potions seemed to run out I would be fed another one. She herself rotated between meditating and using the nature type energy on me. At night she would rest, but always make sure the effects of the potions were active long enough.

Whenever I had regenerated a bit of mana, I would use it on myself with the intention of healing. The mana I could use was very little and took a long time to fill up, so the effect was limited.

On the third day I finally got some feelings back into my body. I was able to blink again. The moment she saw me do that she was laughing out loud and saying some things I didn't understand. Then she held me on the shoulder and gave me a shake.

She must have decided on something, because it was then, that she took of what scraps of clothes I still had on. I watched rather apathetic. Then she took a piece of cloth and some water and scrubbed my whole body. It felt a bit weird but I was mostly numb anyway.

Then she dressed me in some pants and a blouse. The clothes were a bit short and loose. I guess she had chosen them to somehow fit me and not for exact size. She put what was left of my boots to the side. After looking at the remaining rags I wondered why I had kept them so long. The thought had never really crossed my mind under the circumstances.

On the fifth day I was able to move enough to sit up, and roll around. I was also able to talk again. Although I was unable to communicate with the woman I spoke out, just to show her, that I was actually intelligent: “Thank you for rescuing me.”

I knew she couldn't understand, but that was never the point. She still seemed quite happy and nodded.

Deciding on something I pointed out to one of the mana regeneration potions, when she took one out again and asked: “What is this called?” She spoke something and I repeated. I don't know if she was calling the potion, the mana or the effect, but I had decided to make it my first learned word in this world. I had a strong feeling that I would have to depend on these potions.

How should I introduce myself? I knew my old name didn't fit me anymore. It seemed obvious, so I decided to take on my character's name. The question was what I should tell of who I was.

For now I just pointed to myself and said: “Shalyne.”

She pointed at herself and said “Catherine.”

While I was recovering over the next days I tried to learn as much as I could. It was difficult to expand my vocabulary beyond a few words, but I tried to take in whatever possible.

I began to eat and drink. Hunger and thirst had always seemed secondary, and I never knew how starved I was until I took the first bite. Something in my body began to shift and I started to feel more alive. The food was preserved and dry, but it tasted full of flavor to me. I enjoyed every bite.

After a while a pressure started to build up somewhere below my stomach. It was a bit irritating and I ignored it at first, but it increased over time. It didn't feel like pain, but was still very uncomfortable, especially when it started to become stronger. Finally it hit me. I didn't have to go to the toilet in ages, and had completely forgotten about it.

With an ashamed look on my face I gestured to Catherine to my lower body and then attempted to get up. She seemed to understand me, and helped me take the steps to some place away from our camp. Then she stripped my pants down and held me up in a sitting position. It was a very shameful way to go about business. It was not difficult to release the pressure, but it felt wrong down there.

Afterwards Catherine helped me clean up and brought me back to the camp. The worst thing was when she tried to explain some corresponding words to me. I never wanted to remember this situation again, but sadly had to repeat it a few more times before I was finally able to take care of it myself.

When I was finally able to slowly walk again I was very glad. It gave me back some of my independence and I vowed to myself to prepare whatever necessary to ensure that. While it seemed that I could depend on Catherine for mana regeneration potions for now, that was certainly no permanent solution. I would have to find a way to increase my mana output and regeneration by a lot.

Another thing I wanted to achieve, was to become strong enough, that I would not fall back into such a helpless situation on the first little gust of wind blowing me over.

How strong was I anyway? It was very difficult to quantify. I was nowhere near the power Shalyne had had in the game. Even when comparing it to my old male body on earth I fell short. Of course I had always been moving around while torn down, but my maximum capacity for any given task also seemed to be below what I had been able to do.

I felt weak. I was unsure of how much I would be able to lift or how quick I could be when I healthy. The only thing where I exceeded my former body was the use of magic. My sense for it had never left me after leaving the game, while on earth I didn't even have anything resembling it. Although it might be argued, that with my own regeneration in the negative I was actually weaker in that regard, too.

What could I do to improve upon myself? Physical training seemed obvious, but that might not help with mana. Perhaps there were some types of training for that as well. Then I remembered that when I had appeared here, some strange messages had popped up. Maybe there were more game like solutions as well.

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The problem came down to my lack of information. I knew nothing about this world, and it clearly worked different from earth. That led to the problems in communication. Without proper language it was nigh impossible to even discuss what information I wanted to obtain. Right now I could exchange a few simple words, but they only described the most trivial and daily issues. Catherine was careful to use simple words when talking with me, so I could understand some of it. But it would still take a lot of effort to progress to where I wanted to be.

While I was pondering these issues, Catherine came up to me.

“We something something walk. Get up.”

She gestured me to get up and I stood up. Then she began to pack up the camp, so I guessed she wanted to leave.

Considering that she had come out here and taken the time to heal me up, take care of me and teach me language, I didn't think she wanted to leave me behind. It also seemed, that she had purposefully made her way here just to find me. After all she had been equipped with everything that had been necessary in my recovery. I wondered what her intentions were.

Nobody would come out and make such an effort just to do some good. At least those were my believes in anything living. She seemed dependable for now, and did treat me well, so she had that in her favor. I had no other choice than to go along with her, and I was thankful for her assistance. Depending on what was on her mind I would have to deal with the situation.

As long as I could pursue my own goals I was ready to put up with at least some inconveniences. Those I would have no matter which path I took, and Catherine also seemed to be a good assistance in at least some of my issues. I would have to wait and see.

When the mule was fully packed, we began to walk. There was no more place on its back, so I had no chance to ride. That meant our speed was slow and we had to make many breaks whenever I grew exhausted. I also had to use my old boots, which were uncomfortable to walk in, but still fit better than the pair Catherine had brought along.

Catherine would often continue the healing when I was resting, and it didn't take long until I could keep up a normal pace. We still had to take breaks, but it was always me who had to initiate them. She seemed completely unaffected.

There was no regular road. The way we took went through the ragged and dry landscape. It even had the familiar color of the gray hills. I must have been very, very close to ending up just there. At least there was some green here and there, but the area seemed uninhabitable and I did not even see any animals strolling around. The terrain didn't really change, so it became a journey without any excitement.

I still enjoyed it though. I began to feel better than I had since the ritual and slowly became more and more lively because of it. Catherine continued to talk to me, so the time was well spent, too. When we rested I always tried to end up at a place with at least some bunches of grass. It was always a lovely sight to watch.

On the third day since we left a message popped up:

Endurance increased by 1.

I stood still and just stared at the message. I was actually really excited. This message meant that I really had an option of becoming stronger. In whichever ways this system worked, I would have to find out all about it and exploit any edge I could get. Min Maxing does come naturally after all. I didn't feel any stronger though. Was training gradual?

Since it had only been the second time of seeing such a message I must have been rather obvious about it.

Catherine looked over to me. “What is it?”

I gestured a popping up screen as good as I could and she seemed to understand. Then we tried to communicate what endurance was. Finally she asked me: “How much do you have?” That was a very good question. I certainly wasn't very enduring, and there had been no such stat in the game that I could compare my current level to. In Ascension, players didn't tire at all. You could go on and on for hours and still fight at full strength.

The messages had never entailed any information of accessing it. I don't know if there even were such methods available or if it would require me to learn them the hard way. Was there a way to access my personal stats? Or even analyze those of others?

“Say something.”

Before I could come to any conclusion of my own, Catherine had spoken to me. I did not understand the word, but repeated after her: “STATUS”

A screen appeared before me, and I became a bit sad.

Shalyne Class: Sorceress Profession: Enchanter Stats:

Strength: 5

Dexterity: 8

Vitality: 6

Endurance: 6

Intelligence:11

Health: 45/60

Mana: 110/110

Mana Regeneration: 1.10 mana/minute (5.10 mana/minute)

Why did I have to be level 1 again? The ritual had really fucked me up. I had already guessed that I was nowhere near as strong as in the game, but this put the final nail in the coffin. I had been completely reset to level 1. Aside from endurance, the other stats were the same way I had distributed them when I created Shalyne. Stats always had a base value of 5, and that had held true even for endurance in a way.

“You alright?”

My depression must have shown. I really had a long way before me. Then I remembered one other thing. There had been many ways I had interpreted possible outcomes for the ritual. One was the inability to level at all. That would really doom me. I was not all that worried though, because I had been able to gain at least one stat in a way alternative to leveling. Time would tell.

“I am weak.”

We both became lost in thought. I wanted to ask more about the system, but for questions such as this my language abilities were entirely inadequate. Catherine wanted to say something a few times, but never spoke out. Perhaps she finally found the right words after a long period of silence:

“You work for me, I help you.”

I nodded. She also nodded, a light smile on her face. Whatever intentions she had, they would soon begin to play themselves out.

Our travel continued on. The land slowly began to change. The amount of grass steadily increased and I also saw some bushes. Some small animals started to appear, but they quickly hid away before we came close. The ground had changed from an almost entirely rocky area to a mix of soil and rock.

While I took in the changing scenery a huge snake had appeared before us. It could hardly hide itself with a length of at least 4 meters. I wondered if it could find enough game out here. It steadily approached us. Catherine nonchalantly threw a fireball at it, wiping it out in one strike. We approached it and then she dissected the snake, taking out a few parts, but leaving the main body behind.

When the first stunted trees appeared we had traveled an entire week. Our speed was very steady by now. I felt so great I was hopping around at times. It had been a very long time since I had been pain free, that it had just become background noise. But now my mind was able to process more trivial sensations.

My bra didn't fit right. It was not a horrible fit, but still uncomfortable. I guess I was lucky that I didn't have some ridiculous rack, elves usually had slim figures after all. But that didn't mean I was anywhere near flat, and the constant twitching never ceased to remind me.

The only thing that still hurt were my feet, but only because of the constant walking and the bad state of my boots. The difference was, that it had become such a focused point, that it was quite an annoyance.

Before I had probably ignored it, but there was also my hair. Its length was below my shoulders and it had a will of its own. Some strands would always dart around right in front of my face. The idea of cutting it somehow made me sad, I had always loved women to have long hair. It was only that I had never had to put up with it myself. Perhaps I would make a ponytail out of it.

Endurance increased by 1.

Another message popped up and gave my mind some distraction. Thinking of my overall stats I realized, that if we were to travel for much longer, my endurance would soon exceed all my other stats.

Once the first little streams appeared the landscape rapidly changed into a forested area. The scent of the air was fresh and full of life. I could almost imagine becoming one of those abominable tree huggers myself. A forest is such a beautiful thing. There are trees and herbs and animals. Lots of wolves of course. Lots and lots of wolves. It's ridiculous really. Catherine constantly had to keep them at bay with some kind of darkness, which streamed out of her hands in long threads as thick as an arm.

It frustrated me, that I had no way to measure the strength of the wolves, or any animal. Considering the fact that strength did not directly correlate with size of muscles and overall height it might be dangerous to even face two look-alikes of the same species. At least the fluctuations in the auras they gave off differed.

“How strong are wolves?”

“Some are weak, some are strong.”

“How do I know?”

Catherine struggled to come up with an answer.

“I can't show you now. You can know it. You will learn it later.”

At least there were some ways of estimating their strength. If you are weak in this world even some mouse can seem scary. I could finally understand the issues elephants seemed to have.

The morning after the second night in the forest Catherine told me while packing up:

“We arrive today.”

I had been curious where we were headed the entire journey, so I had greatly anticipated this. I didn't ask about the place, I would get a much better picture by just waiting and seeing for myself.

About half the day in and a few wolves later:

Endurance increased by 1.

I just smiled to myself this time, but wasn't surprised anymore. I had hoped for one more stat increase, because after the traveling was over my chances to push up endurance would probably decrease.

The area around us was still a hilly, forested area, but there were only few rocks on the surface now. There were no real mountains around, but I guessed the ground level must have constantly risen, because we had followed the same stream upwards for a while. The difference can't have been to great, because it comfortably flowed with a slow speed and the were no steep slopes.

I could see some fish swimming about and lost track of time while watching the stream, because when we suddenly stopped we had arrived in front of a hut. It was separated from the stream by about two more meters of altitude. To both sides of the stream two small hills slowly rose up, and the hut was built close to one of them. It was solidly built of stone with a wooden roof. If Catherine was living here alone than it was quite opulent in size.

She led the mule around the back to a small shed, that was built into the hut, but not connected. She took off the saddlebags and we went around to the front before entering.